Chapter 27 Matured

Flashback in blue

~26~

Bliss was what she felt as she lay on their bed watching the moonlight stream through their window. She wondered if she had ever felt anything close to this in her previous life. She did have her moments when her children were born, when Toshu first called her Ma, when Samar first kissed her, when Sweety laughed for the first time... yes there had been plenty of blissful moments but there had been never one with her ex-husband. It had always been fear for her with him. Fear that she wouldn't be able to fulfill his needs, fear that he would leave her, fear that she would never be loved... fear, fear... it had always been fear... but today she felt none of it. His love had engulfed her and transformed her. He never judged her for what she did, always made her feel enough. This feeling of bliss was all because of him. She let out a happy sigh when she felt a warm hand wrap around her waist. Pulling her closer to him, he rested his head on her shoulder and nuzzled against her neck breathing in her scent.

"I thought you were asleep, wifey..."

"Anuj..."

"Hmmmm?"

"Thank You..."

He lifted his head a little and looked at her with his eyebrow raised.

"I have never felt like this before... you know... before I met you... I never knew I could lay naked in my husband's arms and feel so safe and loved. I never knew that I can say whatever I want during sex and my husband would still enjoy. I never knew the bliss of being able to openly communicate my needs to my husband without being judged. I never knew if I had to stop because I felt tired or sick or had mood swings, my husband wouldn't feel offended. I was always afraid of failing... of spoiling the sex... of being a disappointment..."

She sighed a little and shut her eyes as the nightmarish images of the times her ex husband had scolded her for not being able to please him flashed. His harsh words during the initial stages of their marriage still echoed in her ears

"Shut up, shut up... who cares what you feel... now you spoilt the entire mood. Now how can I have sex with you. Why don't you shut up and do what I say woman?"

A lone tear fell out her eyes at the memory. She immediately felt his lips on her cheeks wiping away the tear and smiled. Opening her eyes, she found him looking at her. He nodded in negative

"Its over. You are with me now. You are so so loved, my Anu. You are mine."

She nodded and wrapped her hands around him cuddling close to him.

"I know... I feel so safe here, Anuj... Never let me go... ever... I love you..."

Placing kisses on the top of his head, she said

"Make love to me again, Anuj... I need you."

The moon continued to lend its soft glow as he gently eased her pain fulfilling her need.

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