Tod Da-e-Dil

3 years ago

Dark Charm

@WildestDreams

Mainu deyo na wafaavan mainu dhokha dedo

Dhokhe vich bada hi swad hunda ae

I Act

The first thought Harleen made was the most banal that could exist: she hated hospitals.

Trivial, yes. But who could love those places? Not even those who worked there, probably. Those nauseating white walls, the pungent smell of disinfectant and drugs, the patients who dragged themselves along, put a sense of anguish and depression that pressed on the stomach like an invisible metallic plate.

And the worst part was that the person she was going to meet was unable to drag himself or make any movement.

She felt her head detached from her body as she walked almost in a trance through those labyrinthine corridors. She finally arrived at her destination and she saw them all there. Relatives and friends. Harleen rushed to meet his aunty, her eyes swollen with tears, her face pale.

"How is he?" Harleen asked.

"He was lucky." she replied, her voice broken.

They turned to the room. Sunny was there, with all those wires and tubes sticking out of his arms, his eyes closed, his black hair scattered across the pillow. He really made an impression.

It was only half an hour after the phone call, but Harleen felt it was a lifetime. She felt like one who was walking quietly in the park and suddenly finds himself in hell.

"Hello?"

"Hello. May I talk to Sunny, please? On his cell phone I was unable to contact him."

Silence at the other end of the line.

"Are you a friend of him?"

"Er ... yes."

Still silence.

“I am his aunty. He ... now ... now he's in the hospital. He had a car accident. "

An accident, of course. Harleen knew it wasn't like that. Everyone knew it. 

"Why?" Her aunty cried. "Why did he do such a reckless thing?"

She did not speak for a few minutes.

"Not why." she finally said, clenching her fists. "But for whom."

Sunny had fallen in love for the first time. That was the only mitigating factor that Harleen had been able to grant him for being stoned in that way. He had heart-shaped hams over his eyes and he couldn't see what was self-evident to everyone: Sonia didn't love him, she was just using him.

It had been like watching a sleepwalker walk inexorably towards a precipice and when it was over, it was as everyone had predicted it would end: with her letting him go and him getting completely destroyed.

But Harleen knew it would only be a matter of time before he did some bullshit. She didn't think, however, that he would go that far. He hurt himself because of her.

                                                                                    II Act

Kithe nighahan kithe nishaane si

Gallan si sachiyan ya laaye bahane si

The doctor put a hand on her shoulder, making her jump.

"Come on, lady, go home."

"No." Harleen shook her head vigorously. "I want to stay here, he might wake up."

"You need to rest." he said

"I'm not tired." In reality she was exhausted, she hadn't eaten all day. But she didn't care.

"Go home." repeated the doctor "There is no news for now, but when he wakes up you will be the first to know."

"Do you think he will recover, doctor?" she asked

"I am optimistic. There are no injuries to vital organs. He is a strong guy. "

Harleen made a face.

"No he is not. That's why he's here. "

The other smiled.

"With a friend like you, I'm sure he'll get through it all."

Harleen smiled pale. Then she stretched.

“Maybe you are right, doctor. It’d be better if I go home to sleep for at least a few hours. "

***

Initially the movement was so slight that Harleen thought she was just imagining it. Then she saw it clearly. Sunny had raised his hand.

"Sunny!" she rushed into the room and almost threw herself on his friend.

"Oh, thank God, thank God!"

Tears began to roll down her cheeks.

"Harleen ..." he moaned in a very low tone.

“Yes, I'm here, dummy. I am here, do not be afraid, now everything is fine. Everything will be fine. Are you thirsty? Here, wait, don't make an effort, I'll get you some water, I'll take care of it. I will take of everything! "

                                       ****                                   

"You're recovering beautifully." Harleen smiled at him a few days later.

Sunny grimaced.

“I'd like to go back to eat something decent. "

“Well, did you want to go around bullshitting? This is the punishment. "

A silence fell between them that lasted a few moments.

"The speech is coming, right?"

"Of course yes. I just want to know how the hell you came up with such a thing. "

Sunny bowed his head.

"You already know the answer." he said

"Yup. But it's so absurd that I can't believe it. Unbelievable, Sunny! For that girl? "

The other bit his lip.

"Why do people choose to love those who harm them?"

Harleen put her hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Each of us accepts the love she/he thinks she/he deserves."

A sob escaped from Sunny’s chest. Harleen began to rub his back tenderly.

"So I deserved it?" Sunny asked

Harleen shook her head.

“You just wanted her to love you, Sunny. You wanted to believe with all your heart that she reciprocated, that she felt the same things. It's normal. It is human. But now it's over. "

Sunny rested his head on her shoulder. Harleen hugged him then gently pushed him aside.

She looked him in the eye.

"Now you could really find the love you deserve. "

She raised her hand and touched his cheek.

"And maybe she's closer than you think."

They stood there for a moment, motionless. Then Harleen got up quickly.

"I'm sorry, I have to go now."

***

Idiot. She was repeated this in her mind the following days. Did she have to choose that moment to make him understand her feelings? She made a fool of herself.

Yet, this was the case and she was no longer able to hide it. For a long time she had considered him just a great friend, but in the last few months what she felt had evolved into something deeper, something she had tried to deny, then suppress and finally accepted, even knowing what it was. A feeling without a future.

But she would have been happy with being a friend, it wasn't a play, nor a role that weighed on her, she just needed to be close to him. And now she had ruined everything.

She never went to see him in the hospital anymore, she was too embarrassed and she was sure that he understood and that he didn't want to see her.

However, she kept herself informed of his condition and was the one who rejoiced the most when he was discharged.

One beautiful day he rang the phone.

"Hello?"

"Harleen?"

Her heart leapt in her chest.

"Hi Sunny!"

"How are you?"

"I'm fine. And you're fine too, I'm really happy you're back home.” she said.

“We haven't seen each other for quite a while."

Harleen remained in an embarrassed silence for a few moments.

"Sure..." she finally said, vaguely.

"That's why I called you." he said

The other swallowed.

"Oh yes?" she swallowed.

"I was wondering if the two of us ..."

"The two of us..."

“If you wanted to go out for a drink. We haven't done it in a long time. " he continued.

"You're right. We haven't done it for long. " Another of the things for which she had to thank the very nice Sonia.

"See you soon then?" he asked hopefully

"Perfect." Harleen answered, happy as she hadn't been for in months.

III Act

Aithe saareyan di gall jism’an te ruki ae

Roohan wala pyar barbaad hunda ae

Harleen ran. Her heart was beating in her chest like a drum. She was nauseous. She heard him calling her, but she didn't want to turn around. She didn't want to listen to him. Never again.

She stopped in front of the house and took the keys, but her hands were shaking so much that she couldn't get into the lock. Sunny took the opportunity to join her.

"Harleen, please, let's talk about it."

"Go away."

"Please let me explain."

“Explain what? I understand perfectly well, you know? I'm not as stupid as you thought, or rather you hoped! You took me to that bar just to get the excuse to see her! And if I could, with great difficulty, accept that ... ” her voice broke. “What happened next did not. You kissed me, do you realize? You kissed me to get her attention and make her jealous! " Her eyes filled with tears. “How could you? Knowing how I felt about you ... I thought you were a friend, how the hell could you do this to me?! "

"I ..." Sunny bit his lip. "I love her. I'm sorry, okay? But I can't accept that she left me. We were so good together ... I want her to come back to me. I'm sure it was a moment of confusion, she ... "

“You… you can't speak seriously! What the hell is in your head? What the hell have you become? " Harleen was incredulous.

"I am sorry. I never wanted to get to this. But I couldn't tell you because you would never have accepted, so I was forced to do so. But it's also your fault, you didn't behave like a friend, if you had done it, all this would never have happened. "

Harleen was  speechless.

Sunny took a step forward.

"Listen to me." he said

The other withdrew.

"Stay away from me." she screamed.

"Harle ..."

"Do you remember when I told you that you choose the love you think you deserve? Well, how true it is! You deserve it, you deserve each other, you are the same. " There was no anger or pain in her voice, not anymore, her tone was flat and cold. "But not me. I don't deserve this love. I don't deserve you. And you, Sunny, you don't deserve me. "

"Harleen ..." 

The door finally opened. She walked into the house without even looking at him, then turned around one last time.

“Goodbye, Sunny. I hope it was worth it“ The door closed with a final bitter sound.

Jehda dil ton nibhave

Ohnu puchhe koyi na

Jehda tod da e dil

Ohi yaad hunda ae