Chapter 13

Devakshi FF: Reaching Out

Part 11

Sonakshi observed Dev very carefully as he took a deep breath and begun talking again.

"Main 7 saal ka tha jab mere papa ko business problems hona shuru hua. Tab main bohot chota tha, zyada samajh nahin thi mujhey business ki, par itna janta tha ki problem jo bhi thi serious thi."  Dev got up from the couch and started pacing while Sonakshi observed his every move and listened to his every word. Her therapist senses had kicked in the moment Dev had expressed his wish to tell her about his problem. From his body language she realised that he was apprehensive. Dev continued, " Tab Neha 6 saal ki thi and Riya aur Nikki 4 aur 3 saal ke, respectively." He paused again and looked at Sonakshi, " Oh, aap Riya aur Neha se toh mil chuki hongi. Meri ek choti behen bhi hai Nikki. Iss waqt Mumbai me hai, studying." Sonakshi smiled a little, " Pata hai. Neha ne bataya tha." Dev nodded. "Toh uss waqt humey sab kuch bechna padh raha tha. Humari cars, sab luxurious items aur bhi bohot kuch." He looked up at the ceiling wistfully, " In fact humey toh apna ghar bhi bechna padha, mere dadaji ne jo pai pai jodhke banaya tha."

He came back and sat down again. " Neha, Riya, Nikki aur main, chaaro Delhi ke ek bohot hi expensive school me padhte the. Toh humey apni school bhi change karna padha. Main tabhi thoda samajhta tha, par Neha aur Riya bohot naraz the. Woh samajh nahin pa rahe the ki unke favourite cheezon se unhey duur kyun rakha ja raha tha." Dev laughed a little remembering something, "Riya ne toh yeh bhi kahan tha ki agar uske favourite doll ko kisine sell karna chaha toh who uske haath tod degi." Sonakshi smiled thinking back to the Riya she had met. "Haan" she thought, "Bilkul tod deti."

Dev seemed to go back to that impassive expression again. "Hum sab ek saath rehkar ek dusre ka hosla badhate, par papa iss situation me kuch zyada hi affected ho gaye the. Dheerey dheerey, woh har roz ghar late aaney lagey." Dev sighed deeply, " Kehte the losses ka dhakka sambhalna easy nahin hai, isiliye kaam zyada hota hai. Par phir baad me ma hume papa ke ghar aaney se pehley hi sula deti thi. Kehti thi ki agar papa dekhengey ki hum jaag rahey hai toh woh bohot naraz hongey." Dev looked at Sonakshi directly again and said, " Par baat yeh thi ki papa ko pasand tha, ghar aakey humse khelna. Toh mujhey tab yeh samajh nahin aya ki ma aisa kyun kehti thi."

Abruptly Dev clenched his fists and stood up, " Mujhey tabhi samajh jana chahiye tha ki kuch theek nahin tha. Ki ma mujhsey kuch toh zaroor chupa rahi thi." Sonakshi knew that they were approaching the harsh truth. So she quietly asked him, " Dev...aap poolside chalna chahengey? Wahan khuli hawa me shayad aap better bol paye." Dev looked at her for a long moment and then nodded. He started walking out to the poolside, while Sonakshi scurried after him. There was a long bench on one end of the pool and a series of relaxing chairs on the other side. Dev walked towards the bench telling Sonakshi, " Aap wahan baithiye." Sonakshi went ahead and placed herself on the bench while Dev remained standing in front of her, at the edge of the pool. Keeping his back to her, Dev said, " Papa se milna toh humara band hi ho gaya tha. Jab hum sote uske baad hi who lauttey aur humare uthne se pehley hi woh nikal jaatey." Sonakshi questioned, " Aap aunty ji se nahin poochtey the, ki woh kyun aisa kartey the?" Dev nodded, " Haan poochta tha, par woh kisina kisi baat se iss baat ko taal deti thi, aur phir main bhool jata tha, afterall meri beheno ki responsibility thi mujhpar. Unhey iss garibi se protect karke rakhna tha humein." Sonakshi nodded understandly. After pause she said, " Phir kya hua?"

Dev looked up at the sky, like he had been earlier that evening. " Phir ek raat ko kuch zor ki awazo se meri need toot gayi. Kuch der main confused tha par phir mujhey samajh aya ki papa chilla rahe the aur ma ro rahi thi. Main jaldi se neechey gaya unke paas. Wahan jakey jo maine dekha, ussey toh meri puri duniya badal gayi." Dev grew quiet after that. When even after five minutes he didn't say a word, Sonakshi opened her mouth to encourage him but he beat her to it, " Mere papa theek se ek jagah khade nahin ho pa rahey tha, aur meri ma apney ek gaal pe hath rakhkey ro rahi thi, unke saamney khade hokar. Ma ko rote dekh unhoney kahan, "Rona band karo" and he raised his hand!" Sonakshi took a sharp breath in. "Par woh ma ko kuch kar paye, uske pehley hi main unke samne jake khada ho gaya. Uss din main bohot roya tha, bohot chillaya. Papa ko ghar se bahar nikalne ki bhi koshish ki, aur uskey liye mujhey bohot maar bhi khani padi unsey. Par jo aadmi iss hadd tak gir sakta hai ki woh sharabi hokar apni biwi bachhon ki parwa karna chhor deye, uss admi ko main ghar me kaise rehne deta."

Sonakshi was awed, " Dev...aap sirf 7 saal ke the! Aapney itna bada faisla khud liya?" Dev walked back to her, " Toh kya karta main Sonakshi? Meri beheno ko abhi poori duniya dekhni thi. Main unki zindagi ko aise hi nahin janey de sakta tha." He took a deep breath to calm himself. " Uske baad teen saal tak maine padhai ke saath saath kaam bhi kiya, taaki Neha, Riya aur Nikki ki life achhi ho sakti." Sonakshi looked at him, " Aapke papa ka kya hua?" Dev looked off into space, " Mere 10^th birthday pe, ma ne apney haatoh se halwa banaya tha. Teen saal me, who pehla din tha jab hum khush the. Par papa se who bhi dekha nahin gaya shayad."

Continuing to look off into space he said, " Raat ko jab khana khake hum sone waaley the papa aye. Teen saal me pehli baar dekha uss din papa ko hum sabne. Par unki halat pehley se aur bhi kharab thi. Andar aatey hi who chillane lagey ki hum logo ne unhey barbaad kar diya. Ki humari wajah se unki yeh halat thi...jab ma ne unhey rokna chahan, bachhon ke saamne yeh sab karne se, toh unhoney meri ma ko itni zor se dhakka diya ki who girte hi, floor se sar takrakar khoon nikalne laga unke sar se. Phir unka gussa meri taraf aya." Dev shuddered, " Woh jaise bilkul pagal ho gaye the. Unke haath me ek knife thi..." Dev looked at Sonakshi, "Main bhagne laga taaki who mujhtak na phunch paye, par usi beech Nikki aa gayi mere aur unke beech." He stopped.

" Dev...phir kya hua?" Dev didn't say a word. Sonakshi tried again, " Dev...phir?" This time when he spoke there was no emotion in his tone, it was like she was speaking to an emotionally dead person. "Kya karta main? Nikki meri behen hai. Agar main kuch nahin karta toh woh Nikki ko mar dete." Sonakshi gripped Dev's hand, " Dev...kya kiya aapney?" Dev looked at her, " Unhoney bhaagte waqt knife gira di thi. Jab who Nikki ka gala dabane ki koshish kar rahey the maine usse uthakar unhey maar diya...seedha dil mein." He let a sob escape, " Maine apne papa ko maar diya Sonakshi. I'm a murderer." And with that he broke into violent sobs full of pain. Sonakshi could feel every bit of his pain. She let her tears roll down freely this time. Sonakshi had guessed that Dev's suffering was huge, but never in her dreams did she imagine it to be this. She couldn't fathom the situation he must have been in when he had done this. She could only cry for him, that is the only thing she could do at the moment.

Dev tried to control his emotions and dried his eyes with his hands. Trying to bring his tone back to normal he said, " dara diya na aapko? Ab dusra tenant dhoodne ka time aa gaya." Sonakshi's eyes widened, wiping her eyes she said, " Yeh kya keh rahey hai aap Dev? Main kahin nahin ja rahi. Aap pagal hai kya?" Dev looked at Sonakshi in wonder, " Aapko...apko mujhsey darr nahin lag raha? Ek insaan ka khoon kiya hai maine Sonakshi!" Sonakshi took his hand in hers and said, " Apni beheno ko bachane ke liye, apne aap ko bachane ke liye aur apni ma ko bachane ke liye. Aapne ek aise aadmi ko mara jo mentally unstable tha aur apne bachhon ko marna chahta tha." Dev shook his head, " Court ne bhi yahi kahan tha. Unhoney toh proudly kahan tha ki maine apni family ki jaan bachayi. Par maine apne papa ko maar diya Sonakshi, aur mujhey sazaa bhi nahin mili." Sonakshi defended him fiercely, " Woh aapke papa kehlane ke layak hi nahin hai Dev. Agar woh sahi miney me aapke papa hote, toh who kabhi aapko marna nahin chahte." Dev let his tears fall again, " Par who mere papa the Sonakshi. He was my father by blood." Sonakshi wanted to end Dev's suffering. She wanted to protect him from the harshness of the situation, so she did the only thing she could do. She wrapped her arms around Dev tightly and let Dev cry his tears dry. All the while she kept repeating a single line, " Aap galat nahin the."

Later that night Sonakshi had walked Dev to his room. He looked totally drained and so did she, but she was extremely happy that he had shared his problem with her. Before he entered his room, " Main humesha aapke saath hoon Dev. Aapne kuch galat nahin kiya." Dev said nothing but looked at her with immense gratitude and happiness. He couldn't believe she hadn't run away yet. Instead she had stayed and tried to convince him that he was not wrong. In an urge of happiness he had hugged her, tightly. And Sonakshi had wrapped her arms around him too. Reluctantly letting her go he had retired to his bedroom with a small, "Thank you." But neither of them could sleep till much later. Both lay in bed, thinking about different things about the evening. But the common factor was, that they both wished that they never had to let go of each other.

**2 Months later**

Sonakshi took her packed lunch from Riya's hands and said, " Thank you Riya! Aaj bohot saare patients baaki hai. Pata nahin kab khane ka time milega." Riya giggled, " Arey Sona Di, aap itna zyada tension na liya karo. You're amazing at your job. Sab achhey se ho jayega." Sonakshi gave Riya a warm smile, " Tumhey mujh par bada faith hai ajkal?" Riya giggled again, " haan woh toh hai. Uska valid reason bhi hai" with that she winked at Sonakshi who just laughed rolling her eyes. Before Sonakshi raced out the door Riya yelled, " Mere pagal bhai ko bol dena kal ghar pe dinner hai. Woh bhool jatey hai. Aur yeh bhi kehna ki aapko saath le jaye!" Sonakshi nodded still laughing and  stepped out onto the pavement. Ever since Dev had told her about his big incident two months back, she had seen vivid changes in his character, which Riya and Neha credited solely to Sonakshi. He was not so guarded anymore, he smiled and joked more. And most importantly, he had made Sonakshi his closest friend and confidante. Sonakshi had also done the same.

She had shared her life with him, her childhood memories, she told him about her family and also about her father's death. Sonakshi had always been apprehensive about broaching the subject about her father because she knew that father was a touchy topic for Dev. She didn't want him to close off like a tortoise again. But when she had finally shared, she was surprised to see exactly how wonderful a person Dev was. He let her cry on his shoulder when she missed her father and even tried to cheer her up. Sonakshi was so proud of Dev, he was a friend worth having and she couldn't fathom why that stupid Natasha had ever hurt him. Over the course of these two months Dev and Sonakshi had become even better friends that Dev and Ranveer, it seemed. They worked in perfect sync.

Sonakshi never had many friends in school. She was so focused on her studies in her wish to succeed in her career that she never took the initiative to make friends. Her family were the only friends she had. But now she had made so many new ones. She could depend on each one of them- Tina, neha, Riya, Ranveer and her best friend Dev.  Stepping into the hospital elevator she thought back to the days followed by Dev's confession. He had seemed uncertain, uncertain of her presence, fearing that she would be off any minute. It had taken Sonakshi more than a week to make him realise that she was here to stay. But once he realised, he was a changed man. In fact it was now a usual sight for Tina to see Dev leaving early saying, " aaj Sonakshi mujhey zabardasti movie dekhne le ja rahi hai" or to see Sonakshi come to the office and say, " Dev abhi bhi kaam kar rahey hai naah, unhey bahar nikalo Tina, nahin toh woh pagal ho jayengey" followed by which Tina and Sonakshi would literally push Dev out of the office and the three of them would go out for an ice-cream trip.

Collecting three patient files from her desk she made her way to the wards. She had three more patients to sit with before she went home. Dev had brought a new DVD that they planned to watch tonight. Dev loved animated films and so did Sonakshi. Tonight was their movie night. She couldn't wait.

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It took her almost four and a half hours to finish all her patient visits. Her last patient was Mr. Shukla. Sonakshi snapped her notebook close and said, " Aaj jaldi so jaiye Mr. Shukla, tomorrow is a big day. Biwi aur Beti se milne ki excitement chehrey pe dikh rahi hai." Mr. Shukla didn't smile but nodded vigorously, "Sonakshi, kya tumhey lagta hai ki who khush hongey mujhey dekhkey?" Sonakshi smiled, " Kyun nahin? Yeh bhi koi poochne waali baat hai?" Mr. Shukla asked pleadingly, " Agar nahin huye toh? Agar woh darke chaley gaye toh?" Sonakshi kept her hand on top of Mr. Shukla's trembling one, " Agar aisa hota, toh woh khud aapse milne aatey hi kyun?" Mr. Shukla wanted to believe Sonakshi, but he wouldn't believe it until he saw his family tomorrow. After bidding him goodnight Sonakshi left, but not before she teased him about putting his best shirt and pant on for tomorrow. Mr. Shukla gave all his blessings in his mind, to this girl who never stopped hoping good things for him.

Stepping out of the hospital Sonakshi sat on Swiggy. Starting it she thought back to Mr. Shukla.  Dev and Mr. Shukla had a lot in common. After Sonakshi had learned about exactly what had landed Mr. Shukla in the hospital, she couldn't help but compare him to Dev. She had learned through the course of these two months that Dev had indeed been to a psychiatrist at one point in his life, but after two sessions he had stopped. Sonakshi had tried to make him talk about it, to make him accept that he did it in defense, because he didn't want to face the reality. But everytime he would shut down and push her away. He would ask her not to discuss it and Sonakshi would have to listen to his him because the matter was his after all. She couldn't force him.

She would often subconsciously connect Dev to Mr. Shukla, thinking of ways to get through to Dev as she had to Mr. Shukla in these past two months. As she parked her scooty and got into the elevator, she was struck with an idea. She widened her eyes and said, " Main Dev ko samjha toh nahin sakti, par Mr. Shukla se mila toh sakti hoon!" She clapped her hands together in happiness. "Shayad woh unhey dekhkey apne mann ke darr ko janey de. Mujhey unki madad karne de!" Stepping out of the elevator she excitedly walked to the door. He would have to agree once he saw Mr. Shukla and his family meet tomorrow. She wouldn't let this chance go. She would most definitely heal him, her Dev. Sonakshi's heart leaped up in her chest.

Her Dev? Why had she said that? And why did her heart just behave like that?

She didn't know, but she would definitely find out.

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That's it!

okay sorry, that's a joke. Scroll down for the next Chapter!