P. S. . . . nothing.

"Oh you are such a cuddler Mr ACP"

"Is that a problem?"

"No, not at all." she smirked, and then cherished the moment by closing her eyes as his strong arm snaked around her tiny waist and his head burried deeply in her neck. He inhaled her scent, and then both of them drifted into a peaceful sleep.

________________________________________________________________________

The sun graced the earth by showing up at the exact same time as always, its rays pouring all over the place and literally making a hole in the earth. it was the month of June, and in Mumbai, the temparature was already 39 degree celsius. Everything was in absolute system, like it should be, The sun's rising, the rays bursting through clouds, the people and their regular activity, everything is and always will be in system. Where does Death fits into this? Nothing. Where does the people who are affected by Death fits into this circle of life? Maybe for a while they will mourn about it, but eventually they will find their way back to the system. Like some famous poet had said, Nature don't stop for anyone. We are all here to be the part of system, we lived like this, and we will die like this, in system.

When Riya Mukherjee Rawte died after 2 years of too-happy married life and 29 years of life as a whole in a plane crash, the people surrounding her did the same. They mourned for a while, they sweared that they won't be able to move on over her death, but eventually they did, it was not their fault, it is what its supposed to be. Her parents moved back to Kolkata cause they could not stand being in the same city where she used to live, not because they wanted to move on, because they could not stand the fact that they had to see their daughter dying. Everyone was, directly or indirectly, back in the system, according to the rule of nature.

Everyone but, her husband, ACP Rawte. Well when God was writing fates of the childern of his, maybe for some reason he was very pissed and his all anger got reflected on this poor guy's fate, cause there is no other reason that why he should be the biggest unlucky guy in this Earth in terms of love. His first wife got killed by some criminal, and the second one died in a plane crash. None of them lived their life fully, and they both took a part of his with them. He was never the same after his first wife, he is worse after the second one. He was very happy with the second one, maybe for happy than the first, and it was hurting more than the first time cause finally in his heart he was accepting that it was his happily ever after.

There was some positive sides too, if it is any positive. He didnt shut himself after her death. He even arranged her funeral (he didnt have the courage to attend the first wife's), he didnt shut down himself from his own parents and was in touch with them. He was in touch with her parents. He was good in work too, no excess anger management problem or that poker face. From outside, none can pin point on him and say that something was wrong with him, but there was something wrong in his behavior. People are not supposed to be that much normal after they lose their wife, the wife whom they love so much. He didnt cry over her body. He didnt quite confront his loss.

The 39 degree- ish rays was not enough for break Rawte's beauty sleep, and suddenly out of nowhere the alarm started to buzz. Still closing his eyes, he threw a pillow towards the alarm and the pillow landed perfectly on the clock, effectively shutting it down. exhaling a frustrated breath, his fingers started to search for someone near him on the bed, but all he could find was the blanket which was over him and cold mattress.

And it hit him.

The realisation hit him hard and his fingers curled into a ball, taking the mattress with it. He burried his head deep and deeper into the pillow, swallowing something with great difficulty as he suddenly felt his throat dry, which was nothing to do with water or his Cutting Tea. He suddenly turned around and got up, all of his fingers into his hair and pulling them, like punishing himself for something.

It was the same course of action like everyday, since she was gone. Everyday morning he wish he could find her sleeping beside him, but it don't happen ever. The cold mattress besides him is a painful reality that she was gone and is not coming back, ever. He spend some time cursing his fate, and then got up, take quick shower to calm himself, then make breakfast. He eat breakfast, all alone and then head for office. It was going on for 6 months, 18 days, 2 minutes and 10 seconds. . yes, he was counting.

But today was different. For a wild moment he thought to skip office and spend the whole day like this, lying in bed and cursing his life, when something strange happen.

His doorbell rang.

He frowned hearing the bell, then got up from bed, sulking like always. His eyes fell on the clock and he groaned, nearly 8 am, the person who is out there better have a nice reason to come so early. He opened the door, and glared at particularly nothing as there was none at the door. Someone did a mischief.

He was about to turn around and go inside, when his eyes fell on a box which was kept near the door. He bend down and picked it up, looking here and there in the hope of the person who kept it here but there was none. He took the box and went inside, closing the door, he kept the box carefully on the table and opened it. Inside it was a cake, on which this was written.

Happy 3rd anniversary my khadoos, from Me.

He can swear that his heart momentarily stopped reading the words, specially the khadoos part. He knew that the juniors back in office call him that behind his back, but the only person who used to call him this in his face was. . .

Can it be. . .?

Shaking off the dizzy feeling, he quickly checked the box, nearly tearing it apart in the process. Nothing on it, no address of sender nothing. But, there was a CD.

His heart started to beat very fast, like it can give Bolt a solid competition in the matter of speed. His hands shook as he put the CD into the video player, and his knees gave away as he sunk into the floor. His eyes filled with the unshed tears, both of happiness and pain, as the screen filled with her face.

"Happy Anniversary Arjun!!!!"

Ah, that beautiful melodious voice. He closed his eyes, trying to absorb the blissful feeling. It feels like ages that he heard her voice, though every night he hear it in his dreams, feel her touch, inhale her scent.

"I know, I know. . ."

His eyes snapped open hearing her voice and he concentrated more on it.

"You must be thinking so silly I am, that I am sending you a video message on our Anniversary day. But if, you are seeing this video, then probably I am dead." She laughed, and he frowned in confusion. She knew she wont be here during his birthday?

"No no, I am not dying, I mean. ." Her face was amused, like the whole idea is a mixture of ridiculous but exciting to her, "my vitals are strong. No cancer or brain tumor or anything. You know, I was reading a article about Indian army, and came to know they write letters to their family before they go in the battlefied. If they don't come back alive, Army send their letters with their belongings to their families, so the letters become the last letters of their life. And of course, I was inspired by that."

He rolled his eyes, trust her to come up with these kind of ideas.

"Now, don't roll your eyes at my idea." Her face was little bossy type and he chuckled hearing it, "Maybe it will be silly to you, but its not, okay? I know, I know, we are not part of army, but we are part of police department, right? Army people do their job in the battlefied, we make society our battlefied. Even there is no guarantee of our life, is there?"

He nodded, finally getting from where she came up with this idea. She smiled in the TV screen.

"See? You see the world through my eyes, and world will become more beautiful."

He smiled again, the tears making their way through his cheek. She slapped her head in the video.

"No, I didn't make this video to give you philosophy about life and all. Its our anniversary, and as I am not there, you are probably sulking. I already gave you the first of gifts, yes, more are on their way." She gave a shy smile, making him smile too along with her, "Now its your turn to give me gift. First, I want you to go to bathroom and get a nice, long shower. Shave that stubble, please, though I love it but please, shave properly." Her voice turned bossy yet again, and he said aloud, 'Yes ma'am', like she can hear him.

"Good." or maybe, she did hear him. She smiled like she had heard him agreeing to her, "Then, eat the cake. I know, you hate sweets, but please, little bit? For me?"

He nodded.

"Good. Then I want you to properly dress up, wear that white shirt and black jeans, ok? That's my favorite. And then, get out of the house and take a lung full of fresh air. It must be ages since you did that, is not it?" She narrowed her eyes, "and then go to Cafe Latte restaurant. Our favorite place, go there and order a proper breakfast meal."

"Ok, that's all for now. Like I said, more gifts are coming, but don't try to guess how and when they are coming, ok? I am smarter than you ACP, samjhey, ya samjhaoon?"

He laughed hearing her sentence. She laughed too, and then gave him a long stare, her eyes filled with love.

"P.S. . . nothing." She wanted to say something, but didn't. She shook her head, and just like the way she appeared, out of nowhere, she vanished.

After one hour, ACP Rawte was on the streets on Mumbai, without his ETF SUV, walking down the road, taking lung full of air (filled with the dust and smoke coming out of traffic), freshly dressed, properly shaved and dressed, going toward Cafe Latte.

 He reached Cafe and sat on the very same table where they used to sit every time they came here, be it to celebrate some small things or just to grab a bite. He was going through the menu, when suddenly a waitress came and placed some plates filled with food on his table.

"Excuse me?" he frowned at this and looked at her. The waitress smiled kindly at him, before speaking, "Are not you Arjun Rawte?"

"I am." He nodded. She smiled once again and then took out a card (with a rose inside it) and a small piece of paper. She handed it to him and left, not before wiping a small tear drop from her eyes.

He stared at the waitress, and then saw the card. The card was all pink, and he knew it is his second gift today. With shaky fingers, he opened the card.

For my Dear husband

You make me happy just being with me.

With love. . . Me.

His fingers ran over her familiar handwriting and then he placed the card near his lips, kissing over it. He kept the card and took the piece of letter next, his one hand holding the rose softly. He started to read it.

Our favorite restaurant, Cafe latte. I swear Arjun, this place had witnessed our love story since the start, and can give solid competition in this matter to ETF.

He laughed reading this.

Remember our first date here? And then countless dinners lunch and break fasts here? The manager know us inside out, and the waiters know what are we going to order, how wonderful, is not it?

By the way, you checked out the waitress who just served you? If you even dare to lay your eyes on her Mr. . .

He chuckled at her harmless threat.

Ok, coming back to my rants, this place is very special, both for me and you. We have countless memories with this place, and I am sure even after I am gone, you will make many memories in this place, because, the food is very good, and, we just cant shut ourselves from the rest of world, right? You tried it once earlier too, and it didn't work, of course, or I would not have been wearing the Rawte title after my name.

He smiled in this part.

So, don't even think to avoid those places or memories we made, ok? I just can't stand you shutting me, it doesn't matter if I am alive or gone. Running away from stuffs don't make things better, and you are not a coward who runs away from problems, right?

"You always had such confidence in me. . " he said to himself.

Enough of my rants. Now, just have a look on the food and you can then see my brilliant thinking behind it.

He finally looked at the food and smiled widely.

See? I know, I know, I am just brilliant. You know how much I had to try to remember the menu of our first date? You know I just cant remember details, but finally, I managed to do so *patting my back*. But as ours were a dinner service and its probably morning now, I modified little with the menu. French toast, Your favorite Coffee with minimal sugar, fruits, Eggs. Remember our dinner date, that was French menu so toast, coffee because of the sweet in the end, fruits as you are too much into fitness and eggs, because its my favorite.

He smiled again reading the lines, like he can hear her own voice telling all these to him in a bossy chirpy manner.

Eat all these and stuff yourself properly, because, the day had just started and there are lots more to come. Enjoy!

P.S. . . did i just call myself Problem?

He laughed aloud at the PS part and several other people gave him weird looks, but he just didn't care. He inhaled the beautiful fragrance of the rose, let his eyes linger little more time at her hand writing, and then he munched on the food.

After almost 45 minutes, he was very much full and was walking aimlessly toward somewhere. He didn't remember the last time he had eaten so much, and even he was taking occasional Dakaar to let others know how much he had eaten. He was smiling to himself, and the all of a sudden stopped walking as he realised where he had finally arrived.

The flower shop from where he used to buy flowers for her.

He didn't know why but he entered inside, pushing the glass door. The old lady, who used to know him since the time he started dating Riya and bought flowers from here for her, smiled seeing him and waved. He smiled back.

"Long time no see darling." She said, "The regular?"

The regular means a mixture of roses, orchids, lilies and some other flowers, like he always used to buy for her. For a moment he thought to say he wont buy, but he nodded at her and the lady immediately started to arrange flowers for him. He was looking around the shop, when the lady called him out and handed over a card to him.

"Read it." Her voice was excited, but her eyes were filled with tears. He took it, the familiar excitement coming back.

Now now, I am sure you must be thinking how on earth I know from where you used to buy flowers for me. Here is a secret, there are perks of dying.

He rolled his eyes at her first line.

I know, it was a stupid joke. Well I did little researching, as that's the thing I do best, and also, wives know everything about their husbands, samjhey, ya samjhaoon?

He chuckled and started to walk away from the counter toward the flower section.

I always loved flowers, you know why? No, I assure you it has nothing to do with feminine quality. Its very fascinating, that flowers stay beautiful only for very short time, and yet people love them. When someone's pet dies, they fear so much to have a new one because they are haunted by the earlier one, but did you ever see anyone dreading to buy new rose because old one had died?

He shook his head.

I know right, No, none ever do it. See, flowers has such a charm. They stay in our lives, they die every day and every day they born in a new way, still fresh, and no haunting memory too.

I want to be that flower in your life, Arjun.

His heart beat skipped a beat reading the line.

I want to be the flower who always stay in your life, without any complication, without any dreading memory. It doesn't matter that I am gone, I want to reborn in your life every day in new ways. A part of your life, who you remember with a smile and not tears, just like people remember flowers.

Too much philosophic?

He nodded, smiling.

I will soon go back to my cheerful avatar, cause I have a reputation to live up to. Buy some fresh flowers and go back to home. See them and remember me, of course, smiling. There, a gift is waiting for you.

P.S. . . nothing. Go home, Arjun.

Going back to home never sounded this much exciting since she was gone. He literally ran for his home, and fumbled with his keys as he unlocked the main door. Inside, he saw a big box wrapped in gift wrap was waiting for him, with it there was a card too.

Open it.

He did so, tearing apart the wrapper, and he gasped. It was his old guitar, which he thought he had left in his old house. It looked clean, brand new, with wires and proper tuning.

But yet, it was the very same, there was a nice big A as a sign on it.

He continued to look at the guitar, and then snapped out of it, realising this time there was no letter. Disappointed, he stepped back little from his gift, when he noticed there was a audio recorder on his table.

He sat on the floor and then pressed the play button.

Hum hain iss pal yahan, jaane ho kal kahan. . . hum mile na mile, hum rahe na rahe. . . hmm hmm...

Her unmistakable voice.

You always used to think this song was such a sad type, but this song was my all time favorite. Remember, I made you sing this after I came to know you used to play guitar in your college days?

He nodded, remembering the time.

Maybe that was first and last time you played for me. Why you stopped playing, Arjun? You know you could have been a handsome sexy rockstar?

He chuckled.

Maybe because you fear. You fear playing guitar will evoke some past memories. You are so afraid to get hurt, but you keep forgetting one thing, its not in our hands. We have to get hurt, only then we can stand up and rise in our lives.

And why you dread past memories? They are always so beautiful, and they can never get changed, the best part about them.

He sighed, closing his eyes.

So, in this anniversary day, I am giving you back your guitar, and only making a small request, don't stop playing. No matter what, just don't stop. Music is such a wonderful media, how can anyone shut himself from it?

And now, I want to give me my second gift.

His heart beat increased as he realised what she might request.

Your heart beat is rising? It should, cause my request is very dashing, and enthusiastic like me.

"Oh boy." He gulped.

Sing my second favorite song, please, Arjun?

Her voice was puppy like, and he banged his head in the table. He shook his head vigorously.

What? I am ordering you, sing, now!!!!

And the audio ended. He looked around in his home to get some divine intervention, but finally pulled himself up from floor and adjusted the guitar to fulfill her request, because he will do anything for her, it doesn't matter if she is alive or not. He shook his head at his wife's crazy wish, and then sighed.

"this one is for you Ri." He looked toward the ceiling, closed his eyes, took a deep breath and pulled the strings.

At the same time, the neighbor of his house jumped as they heard some animalistic sound was coming from Rawte house, which they realised to be a song. The younger lots jumped on their couches and some even mimicked rockstar's crazy poses as the air filled with a very famous song.

OH BAWARIYA MAIN KITNA TANHA TANHA LONELY LONELY TERE BIN OH BAWARIYA!!!! TERI YAAD YAAD YAAD MEIN TARPE JIYA OH BAWARIYA!!!!! SAANSON MEIN ANKHON MEIN NEENDO MEIN KHWABON TU HI TU OH BAWARIYA TERI YAAD YAAD YAAD MEIN TARPE JIYA OH BAWARIYA MAIN KITNA TANHA TANHA. . .

(From Khiladi 786 Lonely song by Yo Yo Honey Singh)

Khadoos, akdu, sadu kahinka!

Did you say something?

No, not at all

Her sweet smile

How can you be so careless?

None can be so perfect like you, Sir!

Her angry glares

Would you like to spend your rest of life with me?

I would love to.

Her eyes filled with love for him.

Oh, you are such a cuddler Mr ACP

Is that a problem?

No, not at all.

Her shy smile.

He tortured his bed side lamp's switch as every memory hit him. The time in the clock was 5 in the evening, and he was lying on his bed. He felt as if he can see his whole journey with her like a film, filled with drama, comedy, romance, and tragedy.

Her letters, her audio messages, the things she told him, the things she made him did. . . all are so perfect, the timing was so perfect. Only after the letters arrival he realised how miserable he was without her. It was as if he had finally reached the lowest point of being miserable, and she felt it, that's why started to send these to him.

The planning, the delivery of letters, all are so perfect, all this points that she knew him so well, inside and out, but maybe he failed to know her properly. He still can't pin point who exactly is sending the letters on her behalf, there are very less people who had key of his house to deliver the guitar. Nevertheless, he didn't care about the sender, as long as the letters are coming, its fine with him.

But the letters won't come whole his life, one day they will stop too, and he have to go on without them.

He was sure she will teach him how to live without her.

He snapped out of it as the door bell rang. He walked lazily toward it, and then started to run as he felt maybe this can be the next letter. The postman gave him weird looks as he hurriedly signed and snatched the letter from him. Closing the door, he tore apart the envelope, and frowned.

One ticket for Kolkata?

As he hoped, there was a letter too inside it.

I am sure after me, you kept contact with my family, and if not, here is a wonderful chance to establish it. I am presenting you one ticket for Kolkata, my city. Go there, bond with my crazy family and visit my beautiful city. You always used to wonder what is the hype with my city, right? You will see now, especially its the month of October and Durga puja will be in next few days.

What are you waiting for? Go pack your bags, because if my planning is exact (which always is!)the train is on 9 o'clock and its already 8.25.

His eyes widened and he looked at the big wall clock. Damn it!

Go go go! Pack your bags and get a nice long holiday in my city. You will love it, and you need it too. There is another letter with this ticket, read it after you get your seat and sitting on train, ok?

PS...Hurry up!!!

In record 12 minutes he packed his bags and ran toward his SUV heading for Mumbai Central station. On the way he informed Rathore that he is taking leave for indefinite of time. He reached station and ran toward platform no. 18. He could see the train leaving platform and he made a run for it, in mind thinking Riya must be so happy seeing him running behind a train much like DDLJ. He finally get inside the train, and after some more minutes found his seat and sat on it, catching his breath. He then took out the second letter and started to read it.

You know the most scary day of my life? After the anticipation if I can make it to ETF, the next day in my most scary day list is have to be the day when I informed about you to my parents.

My mother was always very much supportive of me, but my father wasn't. He had long list of reasons that why he should refuse this relation, number 1, you are my boss, number 2, you are also police officer, number 3, you are 6 years older than me, number 4, you are not bengali.

But still i managed to convince him for this relation, you know why? Apart from the obvious reason, I was head over heels for you, the main reason was finally I found someone with whom I was so eager to spend the life, and when I did, it just didn't make sense that I let him go for stupid reasons or spend another second without him.

The first time I met you, of course, none of us can forget that. I thought you are some criminal who trying to temper with evidences, and you counter attacked me when I tried to catch you. I swear, I so wanted to punch your face that time, but later I was so embarrassed that you are my boss! My whole face was red and my darling BFFs could not stop teasing me at least for a month.

I admit it, yes, from the very first time I was attracted to you. There was something about you, maybe your silent care for others, maybe your deep philosophical talks, maybe its your working style, or maybe it was all me who was attracted to you and tried to see little bit more into you. I just could not understand why you hide yourself from the rest of world, why you just cant show your real self to the world?

Later, when I come to know about your past, I felt sad. But Arjun, I swear, never for a moment I pitied you. You don't need anyone's pity, you just needed someone who could break your walls and see into you. I am so very thankful that you let me in, and I am just very much lucky that you share the same feelings like me.

When I came closer to you, I saw the real Arjun, who was underneath all the worries and sorrows. The caring honest stubborn, but loving person, and I fell more for him. As long as I was with you, I met the real self of yours every day, and I am again thankful to you for letting me see him.

You know what? When other women used to complain about their husbands, i used to feel bad for them. They maybe didn't get someone as amazing as you, and I am so lucky to get you. I am not lying, really, till date i just could not get any faults in you, my bad! But yes, there is only one problem with you, which is your biggest strength too, you are very much attached to the people you love and anything happen with them, affect you. I saw you falling into the deep pit of emptiness after your thirst for revenge was satisfied, I saw you cursing yourself every time there was a single scratch of my body, even if it was because of the nature of our work or outside. Your life just stops whenever there is something out of place happening around you.

Trust me when I am saying this, Arjun, but you don't need anyone to go on in your life. You are very much capable person to go on with your life, but just stop trying to control everything around you. Things won't happen like we always think, because, then what will the fun in them?

Try to be the part of system Arjun, try to get along with things. Don't be alone, because loneliness hurts. Don't curse yourself for the things which are out of your control, let things go. Let the real Arjun came out, let others see him and let others love you. Trust me, when someone loves you with all their heart, you feel wonderful too. I felt it every day staying with you.

Lastly, enjoy your stay in my city, and do visit the golgappa stall there. You can never eat Mumbai's golgappa after you taste that, I bet!

With Love,

Me

PS. . . still out of breath after the DDLJ type run?

PPS... Happy Anniversary Love.

Kolkata is a rich vibrant city with full of colors, hustle bustle and wonderful people. Anyone who had ever tried to find out about this city had heard all these, and right now He was witnessing the madness, named Kolkata.

It was a unique city. While on the way to Riya's parents house, he saw every kid in every lane or field was playing football, and it was so weird, India is a country famous for its cricket mania but this city balance both the sports. There are hundreds of taxis and lots of traffic jams, but there are so much greenery too, sometime along the way you completely forget its a metro city and not some country side. The citizens, you can see the perfect balance of old traditions and new fashions, the Addas (hang out) which goes on in every tea stall even in office working times, both old and new generation representing there. The lanes named after the people who shine this city's name in independence movements or literature, and the shocking part, some bengali old song playing during the traffic red signal. All in all, its a different and unique city, totally different from rest of the world.

He always used to wonder his wonderful wife was a different creature from a different planet, who manage to make her own place while mixing with everything. Now he can see from where she was coming from, this city was the reason. The mixture of old and new, the acceptance of new things while with due respect to old, the rich culture and the open mindedness, he was already loving this city.

This was the first time he came here. During their marriage talks her parents stayed in Mumbai, even the wedding happened there. This was the first time the Son- in- law was coming home, and the parents had no clue about it.

When the taxi stopped in front of the house which's address he gave, Arjun noticed lots of people were entering and exiting the house, the locality was on high excitement and her house, if he had reached at correct address, was decorated beautifully.

Suddenly he remembered that Once she had mentioned every year her parents arrange Durga puja in their house, and its going on since her Grandfather's time. According to her letter Puja is coming in some days, so the hustle bustle inside the house explain it all. She always used to tell they will once visit city during this time, and now when finally he is here, she is not with him.

He sighed and then shook the empty feeling trying to engulf him. Giving the taxi driver his money, he clutched tight the strap of his bag and entered inside the house, taking deep breath.

Some people give him curious looks, some people giggled seeing him, some ran and walked past him banging into him, while others were constantly talking in Bengali and he had no clue what they were saying. His eyes searched for any familiar face, when his eyes fell on the corner of the big house.

He could see the idol of Durga was in making. It was almost ready, just have to paint it and add her weapons. Some people were working on the other idols Lakshmi Saraswati Kartik and Ganesha, and in front of the Durga idol, one lady was talking to an older man who was listening and nodding to her. He felt familiar though he could only see her backside, and then he realised it is Riya's mother, his Mother-in-law.

He started to walk toward her, his heart thrumming loudly in his chest. A voice even said what will she think about his sudden and unexpected arrival, but he counter argued that he will manage her reaction. He stopped right behind her, waiting patiently for her to finish with the older person and turn to him. The older person noticed him and gestured the female, and then she turned to him.

Arjun smiled little at her, who in response stared at him with her wide eyes. Riya got her mother's eyes, deep brown ones in orb shape. He lowered and touched her feet to take blessing, and she kept her hand on his head, giving so.

"You finally arrived." She said in shaky voice, but still she smiled through tears, "I was expecting you."

He stood up, his face showing confusion, but then he saw her expression changing into somewhat tensed face and he realised who might have just arrived.

Riya's father.

He was different than last time he saw him, he was wearing Dhoti Kurta, he was much more serious. He stared at him, the shocked expression hidden brilliantly under his composed face. He sometimes wonder how can he be Riya's father, she was never this much serious.

He took his blessing too and he gave. Her mother gave him a warm look, and he somewhat composed himself, for a fraction of second his eyes were filled with unshed tears but then it was gone. The men gave each other another look, then he walked away, leaving behind Mother-son.

"You were expecting me?" Arjun asked, and she nodded, smiling, then wiped her tears with the corner of her saree. She called out someone and some young boys and girls arrived. She ordered them to show him his room, and then all of them walked toward another corner of house.

Once he stepped inside the room, he felt he was at peace at once. None mentioned it to him, but he knew, this had to be Her bedroom.

He kept his bag in a corner of room, and let his finger run over the bed sheet. It was ridiculous, he was not sure if Riya ever touched this bed sheet or kept her feet in this room in last 2 years, but yet he felt her. He sat on the bed, resting his frame on both elbows which he kept on his knees and sighed.

"Don't think your father still likes me."

He could not hear anything in reply, but he knew she was smiling at him.

"I will mend this. I swear." He said to her, and could actually see she was smiling at him fully.

The next couple of days passed in absolute rush. He was always busy with the distant cousins and brothers of Riya's who never left him alone even for a second. He didn't mind though, it was the first time he was the centre of attention, it was overwhelming but it was nice. The feeling of a big happy family, filled with Uncles cousins aunts. . . he never had them since he comes from a nuclear family. The day started with the elders, who fused over his meals and lack of appetite, then the whole day passed with cousins and brothers who used to recollect stories of Riya's childhood. In evening they often used to hang out in locality, or go to shopping, or see how other families who arranging puja since many generations are doing with decorations and used to get tensed about the rising competition. All in all, these all things were new to him but not unpleasant. He was loving this family and it was loving him back, just like she had predicted. If he let others in, others will let him in too.

It was the Ponchomi or 5th day of bengali month. Today they will unveil the Idol and start the puja. In the evening the priest along with the elders were doing aarti of idol, and he along with others were standing near them, praying to the God. He never believed in God, yet he was standing there folding his hands in front of the god.

Suddenly one cousin nudged him, and he noticed Riya's mother was ushering him to join in the puja. He at first could not believe it, but then he walked toward him, and along with her and Riya's father, hold the big lamp and offered prayer to God, feeling more into the family than ever.

In the evening, suddenly he found himself alone with Her father in the quiet backyard far from all the hustle bustle inside the house. For one moment he decided to walk away, but it was a nice opportunity to talk to him and he could not afford to miss it.

"Thanks for letting me stay." He started a conversation, looking at his face, "Sorry to jump without any news."

"Sorry and Thank you in same sentence." He answered in grave tone, and both of them stayed in silence. Arjun dueled in his mind, but then came straight into the point.

"Why you dislike me so much?"

"because you stole my Daughter." He didn't even deny his accusation. He turned fully toward him, his face the same composed mask devoid of any emotion.

"I never quite digest the face that My daughter was so away from me. I always thought she will settle in some nearby locality, I will get to see her every day, and I will choose the groom for her." He sighed, shaking his head, and Arjun was shocked to see him smiling, he can't remember if he ever saw him smiling.

"But my daughter, she always do the unexpected things. I never thought she will choose such a career option for herself, neither I ever imagined she will settle so away from me, You know when she was this small, I could not even stay without seeing her more than 1 hour. It killed me."

"She was so adamant to marry you, for the first time she was this much sure about something. I felt you are stealing her from me, that you took her away from me, and till date, I could not deal with this fact."

"You still hate me?" Arjun asked in quiet voice.

"I can see why she was so sure about you." He replied instead, "You are a remarkable person. When you open yourself, You win everyone by your charm. You are alike me in this regard."

Both the men stayed in silent. After what felt like eternity, Her Father spoke again.

"I hated you when you appeared so normal during her funeral, no tears or trace of sadness. I felt you are either running away from the impact, or maybe you didn't love her as much as me, that's why you were so less affected. I wanted to console you, Son, wanted to cry with you, tell you to be strong, tell you we are there for you, but you took that away from me. And for this, I don't think I can ever forgive you."

With that, he walked away from him.

That night, when he came back in his room, he saw a letter on his bed, with a fresh white rose. He opened it and sat on the bed.

Enjoying my city? Cleaned bowled by my Kolkata, are not you? I told you, you are going to love it.

So, won everyone's heart in my family, eh? Are you trying to replace me, ACP? Well, I don't mind, neither I am jealous, so you can stop chuckling or raising your eye brows at me. I told you, you open yourself up and let others in, and you will get more love in return.

This is going to be the final letter, Love, because there are only some other things I have left to say to you.

His heart sank after this.

You can function without me, so I will spare you the lectures, but the most important thing, stop hurting yourself Arjun. Deal with the fact that I am gone and not coming back.

I am trying !!!

I know I know, you are glaring at me and telling you are trying your best, but lets face it, we both know you are not doing it properly. You must be thinking what I know about dealing with death that I am lecturing you about you, I might not know anything about Death and the hurt it brings with it, but I want to only say you this, The pain I will feel during my death, it will be nothing to the pain you are causing to yourself. It will kill me every time you are hurting yourself over my going.

I am not telling you to burn my pictures and all lock all the memories. I am not telling you to start this from tomorrow. I know it takes time, and there are all the time for you in this world, but you try, and lets try this by dealing with the fact. One question, Arjun, you yet put garland over my picture?

He shook his head.

No, right? I knew it. . . I know you can never gather the enough courage to put it. It will take time, but surely one day you can. . . I know it.

He shook his head vigorously, suddenly he could not see properly as his eyes filled with tears.

What I am trying to say. . . I don't want you to enter in that house and immediately sigh that here I used to live but now I am not there. I don't want you to sigh instead of exhaling breathes. I want you to live your life, and not only thinking that how wonderful it would have been if I was alive. I am not alive, I am gone, and now its your life to live. Think about me as a beautiful part of your life, like people do for flowers, remember?

He nodded.

Its ok to miss me, but don't make me everything of your life. Its your life, I was and always will be a part of it, not the whole life itself, samjhey, ya samjhaoon?

And now. . . the part I dread the most, but still I have to say this. . . don't be afraid to fall in love. Don't beat yourself if you feel the same feelings like you used to feel for me, ok? Don't be so harsh on yourself, its okay to fall in love, third time the charm? I am just a small chapter, maybe your happily ever after is yet to come. But when it does, just don't let it go, okay?

I never properly say how much I love you, neither I said those three magical words to you. Now I am saying this, I love you Arjun, I love you so so much. My heart actually aches with joy thinking how much I love you, its not humanly possible for someone to feel like this but I do. I am so thankful for the time we spent, our beautiful married life, thanks for letting me in and making my life blissful by loving me. Thanks for loving me the way I am, imperfect and silly. Thanks for making me perfect by simply staying with me.

Wishing all the happiness and best blessing for you

With Love

Me.

PS. . . nothing. Just, I love you.

He cried and cried, finally letting out all the sorrows and tears he had buried deep inside him after her death. He didn't realise when someone entered in his room and leaned beside him on the floor, but when he felt someone's hand on his head, he leaned toward the person and hugged her tight.

The person, Riya's mother, tried to stifle her own tears while consoling him. She patted his back as he cried in her chest, finally venting out all bottled up pain of his.

"Why me?" He said to particularly none, "After everything I went through, this wonderful woman happened to me, but then she was gone. What is the point? Where is the justice of God here?"

"It was destiny Beta." She answered quietly, "She was not your happily ever after, but it was sure quite an experience to know her, eh?"

After some time, he backed away from her, wiping the tears from his face. She started talking.

"On her funeral day, I found her diary and some other stuffs, and these letters too. Knowing her, I was not least bit surprised that she wrote letters for you thinking if she is suddenly dead what will happen to you. She knew you will survive, but she knew you will hurt yourself inside. She knew you so well that I was surprised. . the letters were scheduled for your anniversary, so I started to send them cautiously on the exact timings."

He looked up to her, surprised to finally find she was the one who was sending her letters.

"The planning were so exact, her words, the way she described everything in the letters. . . when my daughter become this much wise and thoughtful?'' she could not hold herself and started to sob, holding her face in between her palms.

3 months later, Cafe Latte

"the regular, sir?" The waitress asked Arjun as he just sat on the table which he usually acquire. He smiled in response, nodding.

"The very same."

After some 5 minutes, there was his cutting chai with the same breakfast like every day, French toast, eggs and fruits. He munched on them, while talking in phone to his boss in ETF. Suddenly he heard a sound near his table and saw a lady just slipped on the cold wet floor. He hurriedly got up and helped her to stand, and to everyone's shock, the lady was laughing at her own fall.

"Thank you so much." She thanked him, still laughing, and in response he laughed too. His eyes fell on her eyes and he noticed her eye color was deep brown.

"Hi, I am Riya." The girl offered her hand, and he gave in, his facial expression surprised.

"Mukherjee?"

"Pardon?" the girl frowned.

"Your surname?"

"Oh. . . its Singhaniya." She smiled, still holding his hand.

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