Malaal- Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

Rashi was walking in the dark corridor of her house. She couldn’t have alcohol as she hadn’t recovered completely and that lead to her being so restless. She could never tolerate silence; which was very common during nights and now she had to face it in full consciousness. She limped back and forth, her hands shivering a bit. 

“Relax Rashi please. See control yourself. You are stronger than this.”, she was telling herself continuously.

Jigar was roaming in the house as usual. He had passed Rashi’s room several times, touching the door but controlling the urge to open it at the last moment. 

He had has arms crossed to his chest and was taking slow steps.

“You would really need to do something Jigar. She’s the love of your life. For God’s sake, get some strength to face her. You would have to-“. Someone bumped straight into him and he involuntarily caught hold of the person.

It was dark; none could see each other’s face, but each of the two recognised immediately who’s skin was touching them. 

Rashi’s breath was caught in her chest; she shivered hard on the touch of his arms; after all it was two long years since that skin had rubbed against hers.

Jigar swallowed his urge to pick her up and kiss her like anything. To hold her and tell her to stay with him forever.

Rashi brought herself back to her senses; she was getting weak in the knees by now.

“Mr Modi. Will you please leave me?”, she said softly. She didn’t have the strength to be angry. She had enough emotions underlying already.

“No.”, Jigar blurted out. He had no idea what he was saying. Rashi’s eyes widened.

“Doesn’t matter. I will move away myself.”, she said and slipped out of his grip.

“I will always do.”, she added and turned around, trying hard to control her tears. She walked away quickly to her room.

Jigar stood their motionless. A tear rolled down his cheek.

“I will move away myself.” The words were echoing in his ears.

“And I will always love you.”, Jigar said out loud to the silent corridor.

                   *********************

“Don’t talk to me okay!”, Rashi whined on the phone while she sat on the dining table. She noticed the Modi Family there and moved to the hall couch. Gaayu brought her juice and she nodded in acknowledgment.

“This is not done Ishan, okay fine whatever.”, she said as she cut the call.

“What happened Rashi Di?”, Gaayu asked.

“That idiot isn’t coming today. Has some work in Delhi for some days, packing for that.”, she said sadly.

Although Jigar and others sighed with relief, Jigar couldn’t ignore the sadness on Rashi’s face. She looked extremely disappointed.

“Is he such an important person?”, Jigar asked softly but suddenly. Rashi looked up and walked to the dining table. She sat opposite to Jigar and smiled.

Jigar’s heart skipped a beat. 

“He’s the most important person here. Besides another person though.”, she said and looked into Jigar’s eyes.

Gopi and Ahem froze, Kokila stopped chewing midway and Baa smiled. Jigar’s heartbeat ran at full speed and he was about to cry out of happiness.

“And who’s that person?”, Jigar asked softly. Rashi smiled.

“Gaayu.”, she said and smiled even more. 

Everyone froze. Even Gaayu felt bad for Jigar. Jigar blinked hard and looked away. He clenched his fists and prevented a tear of anger escape his eyes.

Rashi laughed a bit and looked at everyone. “Why are you all so shocked?”, she asked confidently. They then looked at Jigar and her expression mellowed down.

“See Mr Modi, I am sorry if I made you think that it was you. But that doesn’t change the truth that it isn’t you.”, she said and stood up to leave.

Jigar was looking at her with a broken expression. Rashi turned around again.

“But there’s one more person. It’s Harshad.”, she said and smiled.

Jigar felt like killing someone instantly.

Gaayu put her hand to her mouth. It was hard to see such tense environment.

“Why not marry him?”, Kinjal blurted out, raising Rashi’s blood pressure suddenly. Kokila gave her a stern look.

“Because marriage doesn’t really give much, isn’t it?”, she said with a smirk and gave a prolonged look to Kokila.

                    *********************

Jigar entered his room and noticed for the first time that almost everything there was in red colour. He couldn’t believe his eyes.

“Rashi has specially made my room according to my favourite colour?”, he thought with a huge smile.

“Drop that smile already.”, Rashi’s voice said from behind.

Jigar turned around and stepped in front of her. And as fate had it, the conversation felt awkward.

“Thanks Rashi, umm, for-“, he said softly.

“For making your room red?”, she asked in a soft voice, taking a step closer to Jigar. Getting very very close to him. Jigar’s heartbeat stopped for a moment. He could break down any moment.

“Yes.”, he managed to utter.

“Really? You really thought that?”, Rashi said with disgust and moved back, crossing her arms. Jigar gave her a confused look.

“Mr Modi, red is the colour of love for lovers. But it’s a colour of blood for enemies. A colour of danger. A colour of warning. And that’s exactly what I want to do: warn you. Do not even try to coerce me into getting back with you. I would never would, get it? And I must suggest you, leave soon, otherwise you would have to witness things that you would never like to. Like seeing other ‘important’ men with me. Men who managed to respect me more than you did. Some of which maybe very very close to me. I know it hurts you and I love that.”, she said with a venomous tone and left the room.

Jigar stood there with tears in his eyes and slowly sat on the floor, the world spinning infront of his eyes.

Rashi quickly walked into her room and shut the door. She sat with the door and controlled her urge to weep loudly. Today there was no Ishan, no alcohol, it was just her and her pain, her love, her hatred and her need to be loved.

                     ************************