Nightmares (Pt.1)

It had taken her more than three hours to fall asleep. 

Rudra watched the rhythmic movement of her shoulder blades in time with her even breaths, visible through the low cut back of her kurti. He had been watching her twist and turn through half-shut eyes for a long time now and he felt cold fingers grip his heart the way they did every time he thought about what had happened. 

Shifting cautiously, he reached out and gently touched her shoulder. He had thought this through - if she happened to be awake and reacted to him, he would say that he wanted to switch pillows because his was too soft. 

To his relief, Bhavya didn't even stir. His hand lingered a moment too long over her soft skin, his fingers brushing away almost reluctantly as he got out of bed and walked over to her side. What he was doing wasn't exactly prudent but he needed to. For his sanity.

It had been four days since he rescued Bhavya from those monsters and four nights since he has been watching her sleep till the sun rose. 

It was a glaring declaration to himself, a screaming signal of where this was heading and what she was becoming for him but damn it all he didn't care. Not anymore. Not after almost losing her once. 

She moved, the sheets slipping off from her petite form as she curled closer to him almost as if sensing his presence. Rudra let out a low, shuddering breath as dark curls of her hair splayed out to just touch his arm which he had placed as close as possible without touching her. It made him feel better, as if he could reach out and stop anyone from taking her away if needed. 

Things had fallen right into place from the day she had come back and he watched her laugh and smile with the entire family during the day, no one noticing anything amiss. 

Except for him.

He had always been an immature, spoilt child but he wasn't blind. He had seen flashes of terror pass in those curious grey-green eyes of hers, gone before anyone could see them. He had been watching her struggle to fall asleep every night as if she was scared of what she might see in her dreams. 

A soft, cool touch made him start as he realized Bhavya's fingers were clutching his loosely. She was fast asleep, her skin glowing from the moonlight that poured in from the open window. He frowned when he noticed the dark bags under her shut eyelids, visible reminders of how something was bothering her enough to not let her get enough rest. 

He had tried asking her more than once. The words had burned his throat and scalded his tongue when he had somehow gotten them out, anger pulsing in his veins like a raging monster. 

Did anyone do anything to you?

The mere thought of anyone touching Bhavya made him want to punch something hard enough to make his bones shudder. It was a strange paradox; he wanted to know if something had happened almost as much as he dreaded hearing it. 

Right now, he could control the fury building inside him with the consolation that nothing had happened and he had gotten there in time. The disturbing dark images that threatened to take over his brain could be reigned in with the hope that he had managed to protect her, the beautiful woman who lay in front of him as if made of glass and sunlight.

She had been very evasive of the question, laughing it off with a silly joke. It killed him even more - what if he was wrong? What if something had happened to her, something so horrible that he didn't even want to think about it?

His musing was interrupted by a sudden flurry of movement as Bhavya moved restlessly in her sleep, her forehead creasing. "Please, let ... let him go. Please -" She was thrashing now, beads of sweat dotting her forehead as Rudra sat there, too stunned to react. 

He had never seen her like this, so lost, so terrified. It was as if someone had ripped his heart out and was crushing it into fine powder. 

"Bhavya." He finally whispered before taking a grip of himself and gently shaking her awake. "Hey, wake up. It's okay, it's just a dream." She shuddered even more, a tear slipping from her lashes and hurting his heart like a knife stab. 

"Bhavya please," He shook her firmly, his throat burning. "Please - just wake up. I'm here, come back to me. Please." 

She shot up suddenly, heaving for breath as her eyes flitted across the room wildly. Her hair was plastered to her neck and she was shaking. "Ru - Rudra." She spoke brokenly. "You're here." It was almost as if she was reassuring herself, saying it over and over. "You're here." 

It took him less than a moment to throw all caution out of the window as he wrapped his arms around her fragile form, holding her so close that he could feel her thundering heart against his skin. 

"It's okay, just breathe." He said softly, feeling her tremble in his hold. "I'm here. I've got you, okay? I'm never letting you go again." Her bony arms wrapped around his neck and she pressed her face into his chest; the small act of faith killed him. 

"I -" Her voice was so low that he could have mistaken it for the wind. "I saw that you were - that they took you away and ..." She trailed off into a gasp and Rudra shook his head, his throat closing up entirely and not letting any words escape. "You're here." 

Her eyes were puffy and red, tears staining her pale skin. He wiped them away with his thumb, letting it trail across the contours of her cheekbone. "I let you get away once." His voice was hoarse, heavy. It didn't have the teasing lilt to it that it normally had, it sounded - scared. Broken. "Not again. Never again." 

Her eyes - grey and green like the ocean - burned into his. "Never." She whispered before burying her head into his chest, her fingers tightly wrapped in his. 

At that moment, there was so much more he wanted to say, so many things that were there at the tip of his tongue but stubbornly stayed there and refused to escape his lips but somehow, it was enough. 

She was here, with him. 

And that was enough. 

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