Malaal-Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Jigar walked in slowly. He saw his mother and aunt crying their hearts out. His sister in law trying to keep them calm. His Baa crying silently. And his wife, the one who was responsible for this, was sitting quietly, looking at the two dead bodies, with what seemed like shock, disbelief and longing. He felt his knees go weak and suddenly a hand grabbed him.

“Jigar please, contain yourself, please Jigar.”, It was Ahem’s voice which seemed faraway. Jigar walked slowly towards his children. The bodies of his children, wrapped in white as usual. But not alive this time. Not asleep. But dead. He sat besides Rashi and touched Sahir and Samar’s faces. His young boys. He always thought that one would become caring like him. The other one would become naughty and clever like Rashi. But she made sure that none of it would happen. She made it sure. She killed her own children. She killed his children. He looked at her in disgust and saw nothing. There was nothing on Rashi’s face. No sorrow. It felt as if her face was paused. As if she was stuck in time.

Rashi’s soul was dead. It resided in her twin babies and now they had ceased to exist and so had Rashi. She couldn’t clearly hear the cries around. The figures of her mother-in-law and Kakiji were floating in front of her eyes. Someone was shaking her. Who was it? Maybe Urmila. But she couldn’t respond because she had lost everything. She felt a strong, painful grip on her arm and some force pulled her up. It’s Jigar. The ice on her face suddenly broke as she saw her husband in front of her. She felt pain in her heart as soon as she realised what Jigar must be going through.

“Jigarji!”, she cried  and hugged him. And she suddenly got pushed away. There was disbelief in Rashi’s eyes. 

“Why did you do this huh? Why Rashi! Answer me!”, Jigar screamed, shaking her. 

Every family member stood there in confusion, and Hetal and Kokila exchanged confused looks.

Rashi couldn’t even say a word. She didn’t even understand what was Jigar saying. Was he asking her that why did she kill their children? 

“Jigar dikra, what are you saying? Please dikra, control yourself.”, Hetal told Jigar softly.

“No I won’t Ma. You all don’t know what kind of woman she is. She killed her own children for her selfish greed. All I can feel is disgust when I look at you Rashi. You are a bloody characterless woman!”, Jigar screamed into Rashi’s face. And then he did something that no one had ever expected from him. He took out a bundle of money and threw it straight into Rashi’s face. 

“Here’s the money you wanted Rashi!”, he screamed.

Everyone looked at him in shock. Kokila put her hand to her mouth in disbelief.

Rashi could feel her face getting hot. The money in her face. The words “You are a bloody characterless woman”, hit her like sharp knives, piercing right into her heart. Her mind wasn’t asking her any questions anymore. It was telling her that there’s nothing left in her life anymore. This man that she loved doesn’t love her. He doesn’t respect her an ounce. He doesn’t feel her grief. And he just threw money on her face. Realisation and anger took over her. It wasn’t her home anymore. It was never her home. She had changed herself for her husband, left all her greeds behind, buried all her insecurities and selflessly loved the family; all for Jigar. And what does she get? Humiliation? Accusation? Character Assanination? She couldn’t bear it anymore. Even looking at Jigar’s face was getting difficult, such was the hatred that had suddenly born inside her. All this while, she stared without blinking at Jigar and moments seemed like hours. Then, she slowly moved. Passed Hetal and Gopi. Her eyes were blinded by tears, so she held tightly onto the staircase railing and climbed. To her room. One last time. She shut the door behind and after some seconds, heard the cries of Hetal, Gopi and Kokila. 

“Rashi! Rashi dikri, please open the door. Look, we will talk to Jigar. Don’t worry beta, I’m sure there’s some misunderstanding in his mind. Rashi!” Hetal was crying from outside.

“Rashiben please! We all are here, your family is here Rashiben. We will sort it out.”, Gopi pleaded. But all they heard was the shattering of glass. After some time, Rashi opened the door and silently walked out, with her suitcase. Hetal, Kokila and Gopi saw shattered glass of Rashi’s wedding photos inside. Rashi walked past them, an expressionless face pasted on her. 

“Rashi!”, Kokila said loudly. Rashi stopped and turned to look at her.

“Rashi, you should not make this hasty decision. We shall sit and ask Jigar what’s wrong with him. Be patient Rashi.”, she said softly.

Rashi walked to her and Hetal smiled, but her smile was short lived when Rashi brought Kokila’s palm out and put her mangalsutra in it. Kokila looked at her with wide eyes.

“Rashi, how can you...”, she said but was interrupted by Rashi’s voice.

“Our relationship is over. Me and Jigarji are nothing from now on. I will miss you all.”, she said and went downstairs. They followed her calling out her name. Meanwhile Jigar, who hadn’t moved a bit, saw her approach him. He gave her a disgusted look.

“What do you want huh? More money? Or an apology? Tell me.”, he said with disgust. Rashi flinched a bit. His words hurt him like anything. She smirked and took her ring off. 

“Just wanted to say Goodbye, Jigarji”, she said and threw the ring at him. It bounced off this chest and rolled to Radha’s feet.

“You are a lier Jigarji. A big lier. You said you love me? No, you didn’t. Because you never even trusted me a bit. You had the audacity to call me characterless, although you are the only man that I have ever loved and now I regret it. You are breaking me apart when my...when my children are dead in front of me? You never loved me Jigarji, and would never be loved till you die.”, Rashi said in a stable, poisonous voice. Jigar’s expression told her that he didn’t care about what she had to say. So she simply smiled and continued,” Signed divorce papers will be sent to you in some weeks. Good bye.”

She turned around, and walked out slowly, her mother following her. Hetal fell on her knees and cried , while tears rolled down Jigar’s face as he ran to his room.

All this while, only one person was smiling. It was Radha. 

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