Chapter 29

Chapter 24

"Bhai! Aapka phone."

"Thanks Neeti. Itni der kahan reh gayi thi. Tune..." Swayam stopped the second he saw Niyati's face. Her eyes were swollen and she had dried tear tracks running down her face which she tried her best to hide.

"Neeti? Kya hua? Kisi ne kuch kaha hai kya?" Swayam was thoroughly alarmed. A crying Niyati was never a good sign.

"Kuch nahin bhai. Bas Taani ki yaad aarahi thi", she replied and left.

Swayam wasn't convinced. Niyati was never a cry-baby. And though she loved Taani to bits, she wouldn't cry over her just because she was missing her.

Sharon obviously feeling the same said, "You should talk to her. Maybe not now, lekin ghar jakar. Shayad tumse apni problem share kar le woh."

"Woh is waqt akele rehna chahti hai. I know woh kuch nahin batayegi", Swayam said with a sigh.

"Nahin Swayam. Koi kabhi akela nahin rehna chahta. At least ask her. Woh batayegi ya nahin baad mein decide karlena."

Swayam looked at her quizzically. Since when did Sharon become caring and sensitive?

 

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          Rey didn't turn up for any of his classes. In fact, nobody knew where he was. Everybody tried calling him but his phone was either unavailable or out of coverage area. Only Sharon had been able to contact him once and he informed her that he was fine and wanted to be alone for some time. Rey's disappearance right after Niyati gave way to suspicion that something had happened between the two. Though why they both would have an altercation was beyond anybody. Rey was a sweetheart who couldn't even hurt a fly and Niyati hadn't been very long in St. Louis to start picking fights. Nobody could understand what could have happened that caused the two most level-headed people they knew to react so violently.

 

                    Rey couldn't stop thinking. Couldn't stop the onslaught of pain, memories and regret that Niyati's words had triggered. Couldn't get Niyati's disappointed tear-stricken face out of his mind's eye. Her trembling voice laced with pain and anger kept echoing in his ears. Rey didn't remember how long he stood in the same spot after Niyati left. All he did remember was the need to escape the shackles of regret that threatened to entrap him and weigh him down. He grabbed his car keys and drove mindlessly for hours, hoping to appease his troubled soul, before stopping at a desolate area.

                    Sitting on the hood, he cried for the first time in many days. Cried for letting Taani go, for causing her so much pain albeit unknowingly, for the future he could never have with her. Though he was in so much pain that he could hardly think straight, he could never regret what happened in the Rehearsal Hall with Niyati or wish it never happened. Niyati's outburst cleared a lot of things that had been bothering him since the time Taani left. It was as if Niyati's words had cleared the debris of unnecessary, unwanted thoughts clogging his mind and paved way to clear understanding. He now understood why he could never get over Taani, why he couldn't just let her go and live his happily ever after with Kria. He understood why she was always on his mind. Because he had wronged her, he thought bitterly.

          Niyati was right. He never really understood Taani. If he had, he would have known how head-over-heels in love she was with him. She had left Jodhpur just for him. Took all his rudeness and atrocities during her stint with Shivam and during her time as GS in her stride, never complaining once. Bore all his misdirected anger with a grace he retrospectively understood and appreciated. She had gone to the lengths of changing her appearance to look like Kria in hopes that Rey noticed her and liked her back. When the girl was willing to do all that, what were the odds that she wouldn't have focused on her career if he had insisted?

                    Rey ran his hands through his hair. He wanted to lash out, pull all his hairs out, do something to get rid of the guilt and pain gnawing his chest. One wrong move, and his future crumbled like a stack of cards. He never realized his actions could have such a grievous impact on his future. Then he stilled as another thought crossed him. Wasn't he repeating the same mistakes again? When would he ever learn? He was behaving the same way with Kria as he did with Taani. He was taking her for granted. He was prioritizing his pain and grief over hers. Just like he didn't pay any heed to Taani's needs and feelings, he was subjecting Kria to the same.

 

          Rey wiped his tears. If he really was ashamed of what he had done and wanted to right the wrong, he would have to be strong. If he ever loved Taani truly, he would do exactly what she would, make everyone around her happy. He knew it must have been the hardest decision Taani ever had to make, to spend the rest of her life with Vishesh. But she did. Not because she wanted to move on, but because she knew that would make everyone happy. She knew that seeing her happy with someone else would give Rey the push he would need to carry on with his life. Even when not together anymore, she was concerned about his happiness. And Rey thought, if he really wanted to apologise and atone for all his mistakes, actions were required. Not empty words.

                                                 

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