Love, Unrequited [Thread 2 : Pg 140] - Page 54

38. For Granted

‘You want to eat noodles? I can whip it for you too.’

‘No, I am meeting someone in half an hour,’ she replied, following him to the kitchenette.

‘Oh’ He put a vessel filled with water on the stove. Extracting a noodle packet from one of the shelves, he tore it open before dropping the noodles into the boiling water. Once the noodles were cooked, he drained them, mixing it with sauce.

‘Are you sure? This is a lifetime opportunity. I have been told I cook noodles really well.’ On the other stove, he put a small skillet, in which he fried eggs.

‘Told by whom? Your past girlfriends?’ When the white of the egg was set and the yolks still runny, he flipped them over the noodles, proceeding to season it with spring onion.

‘Girlfriends? What girlfriends?’ Placing the food and a glass of water on the kitchen island, he drew the counter stool for her. She sat down and he did too, taking the stool next to her.

‘Right now my status is that of a ditched groom, Kirti.’ Twirling some noodles around the tines of the fork, he brought it to her lips. ‘One bite?’

She shook her head. ‘Eggs!’

He remained clueless.

‘We have a Satyanarayan Puja tomorrow. I have to go get Havan materials from the market. I have already shampooed my hair. Now, if I eat non-veg, I will have to shampoo again. I have to sit in the Puja too.’

He nodded in understanding, before proceeding to fill his mouth with the food. He was so hungry; he did not even look up once.

‘How long since you had a proper meal?’ She had asked him when he had opened the door. He looked pale and depressed. There was a horde of beer bottles near the sofa. Also, a strip of paracetamol tablets along with painkillers. His eyes were sunken, boasting of bags underneath and his voice hoarse as he said, Hi.

She had felt guilty ignoring him for so long.

‘Are you sick?’ She had pressed the back of her hand on his forehead. ‘You are running a fever, Tejas!’

‘I was,’ he answered. ‘102 last night. Now it has broken. 99 degrees last time I checked.’

‘Which was when?’ She probed.

‘Today morning.’

‘Have you eaten a proper meal?’ She checked her watch to see how much time she had to spare. ‘Should I cook you some porridge?’ Where was his family? Did they not care a bit about him? And Sana! Where the hell that woman was when her fiancé was sick here?! Was the wedding really off?

‘No,’ he prevented her from walking to the kitchenette. ‘I will cook myself.’ All the years Kirti had known Tejas, she never could understand his need to cook for himself. He had never allowed anyone to cook for him. Cook and serve for you, he will, though.

‘Why have you been drinking when you are unwell?’

‘Valid question,’ he replied, finally looking up as he finished his meal.

‘What is wrong, Tejas?’

‘Everything?’

She looked at him without any pity or judgment. Silently waiting for him to feel comfortable enough to unload his miseries. She might not be his family or fiancée, the one he must truly want by his side but she would be always there in a true friend’s capacity.

‘Like I told you the wedding isn’t happening. You didn’t think I was kidding, did you?’

She was guilty as charged. ‘I didn’t think it was so serious. It was a small altercation after all over the destination of a wedding.’

‘Small altercation?’ Tejas sneered. ‘You should have seen her throwing a wobbly.’

‘But how does it matter, where the wedding happens? You both are in love and are getting married, it is what holds significance.’

‘Go and tell this to Sana’

‘Uhm, if she’s so adamant, why don’t just go along with her?’ Kirti asked. ‘One would have to give in or call a truce. Settle for Goa or Jaipur palace. Money isn’t an issue for you people, is it?’

‘No one is ready for truce, Kirti. If I take Sana’s side, my grandfather begins to see me in a bad light. Not that he ever needs any reason to do that. He has never liked me. I don’t want him to loathe me. I hate this vicious grip he has on me but I cannot stop from wanting to please him. I thought Sana would understand but she has her own game going on. And when I look around for support, there’s no one.’

Kirti sighed. She had never understood the Gupta family dynamics. But she knew Sana, and resented her for making a play of the emotions of Tejas. Did she not know how precious love was? That not everyone had the good fortune of their feelings being returned?

‘Give it sometime, Tejas. When she realizes her mistake and misses you, she will come back to you.’

‘She won’t,’ Tejas replied. ‘She has her purpose fulfilled. Now, she won’t look back at me.’

‘Purpose?’

‘Yes, I was a means to an end. She needed me to draw Nishit’s attention to herself. Once she had that, she got rid of me.’

‘But Nishit has a girlfriend, doesn’t he?’

‘He had girlfriends in the past as well. Didn’t stop him from going after what was mine. Have you forgotten Ahana? He asked her out despite knowing I liked him! He always goes after what is mine. Why? Just because I shared with him what should have been only his. His parents! He already was getting little attention because Prasanna’s condition required utmost care. With me in the picture, he lost that as well. But what fault was mine!?’

‘Nishit will not go after Sana, Tejas. She was his cousin’s fiancee after all.’

‘I bet he’s going to drop Mithila like a hot potato. It is going to happen in a few days. I know the guy. Diwali party, yes, just wait and watch, you. They have always had some unresolved issues and I was a fool to think she loved me. Whenever she needed his attention she used me! Just wait Kirti you’ll get to hear that they have become an item soon.’

‘Why should I wait?! How does it concern me?’ Her annoyance was very much discernible. Her insides were twisting at the knowledge of it. She hoped Nishit would prove to be a better man than this. Or else Mithila would be so heartbroken.

‘Am I so unappealing, Kirti? So damn replaceable? Do I have no merits to recommend me to people? Is it so hard to love me?’

‘Don’t beat yourself over it, Tejas. This is a bad phase, it will pass soon. There are many people who love you. Truly and deeply. People who really care about you.’

‘Where are they? I can't see anyone,’ he whispered, the pain clear in his voice. Putting his head on the island, he murmured something.

‘What?’ She asked, putting her head on the island, imitating him. 

‘Are you crying? Don’t cry.’ She said passing a hand over his head, comforting him.

He turned his head to meet her eyes. His and her eyes on the same level. ‘I wish it were so easy to weep. I feel bad, really bad. Like a grey cloud is following me but no tears are leaking.’

‘It will get better,’ she repeated like a mantra.

He stared at her for long minutes and she did not look away thinking if he needed courage from her gaze, she would lend him all she had. After all, during her low years - when her father had passed away, when she had failed Pre Boards, when she had not gotten a job, when Umang’s episode had happened - she had borrowed all the courage she had needed from him. He had patiently listened to all her sob stories. Every step she had taken and looked back, she had found him, through thick and thin.

‘I have realized Kirti,’ he grabbed her hand which was grazing his head, clasping it in his own, he brought it between them. ‘There’s only you.’

‘Hmm?’ 

‘I have had an epiphany in the past few days. That there’s only you. Only you who were always there. Only you to whom I am indispensable. You won’t throw me away for new people in your life. It’s only you who'd come to me even in the middle of floods. Who loves me to the moon and back. Don’t you?’

He was intertwining their fingers, and she felt tongue tied at the turn the conversation had taken.

She lifted her head up, sitting up; he followed her suit but did not leave her hands.

‘There’s only you who really see me for who I am. Who loves me with all my flaws. Look no one came to see me here. No one. I have been off the scene since so long, but no one cares. Except you. Kirti,’ he gave her hand a tug, and she was pushed closer to him, as he looked at her with new found eyes, his gaze taking in every feature of her and lingering over her lips. 

‘I have to leave, Tejas.' She snatched away her hand from his. 'I...I said earlier right, I was ...an appointment. Let's talk later.’ 

She picked herself up and began to leave.

‘Kirti,’ he called.

She did not turn but did stop.

‘I won’t be able to attend the birthday party. I am leaving for Dubai early in the morning.’

‘Eat properly and don’t drink alcohol. If anything drink water,’ she said and took off.

XxxX

‘I am here to meet Mr.Nishit Aggarwal,’ she informed the receptionist. It had taken two reception counters, and a few peons, long winded walks in the whole office premise and use of an elevator to reach here.

‘Do you have an appointment Ma’am?’

‘He had asked to come between 11:30 - 11:45 am.’

‘It is 12:30 pm now, Ma’am.’

‘Yeah, some work came up,’ she said sheepishly.

‘Your name?’

‘Kirti Singh. I am his...friend.’

Kirti watched as the female staff looked into her I-pad. ‘Ma’am Nishit Sir has a different appointment now. I don’t think you will be able to meet him now.’ 

‘Can you just inform him that I’m here?’

The female receptionist looked her up and down and then pursing her lips, phoned and relayed her arrival to the boss.

‘I’m sorry Ma’am but you are late. He is busy. If it is really urgent you want you can wait, there’s this little slot around 1:15 pm when he might be free.’

Kirti decided to wait after all it was her fault. Sitting on the plush sofa, that spoke of luxury and comfort, she rewinded in her head what had happened at Tejas’ place. She dissected each and every word spoken. Doing this she did not realize how the time flew and it was half past one.

‘He did not come out?’ She asked. ‘At 1:15’

He should have the receptionist thought. Going by her boss’ nature, she knew he took walks during his free time. He liked to stretch his legs, he’d said. Cooped up in one room wasn’t him.

‘I don’t know,’ the woman said.

‘Did you tell him that I was waiting for him?’

‘I did.’

Kirti looked at her phone. The messages she had left for him had been seen but unanswered.  She decided to stay for a few minutes more. If he doesn’t come out, I’ll leave. When he did not appear for another fifteen minutes, she began to leave. 

She typed a last text. ‘Seems you’re busy. Next time, maybe. Tomorrow we are celebrating my grandmother’s birthday. If you can take out some precious time from your schedule…’

She had covered a few steps away from his office, when the huge door opened. ‘Ma’am, Ms.Singh, Sir, has called you inside.’

She looked at her phone. Her text yet remained unread. So a coincidence?

‘Hi,’ she said, pushing back her annoyance at being made to wait. ‘That was a long wait. It might not look like it but I am a useful person and had been appointed to run household errands. All delayed now.’

His office was huge. Could easily house two rooms, an entire apartment of a middle class family. 

All glass and steel. A large table with work assortments. Walls filled with abstract paintings. A sofa, center table. Then a door that leads somewhere. Room within a room? 

The office was transparent from inside. So, if the blinds were not closed, he could easily see the happenings of outside. 

It did not strike her immediately there then that he might have easy access to the picture of her waiting for him.

‘You could have left. It was not like anyone asked you to wait. Anyway our time slot, it lapsed long ago. You had no business waiting here. Time, people, opportunities - one should not take them for granted.’

‘Right, I had no business.’ 

In a shirt, pants, tie, lapel jacket, he looked very intimidating and strange. The grand office setup and cold attitude also did not help. She had to gather her entire strength to hold her own.

‘So why did you want to meet?’ He asked. She had grand plans of making up for the last time’s cancelled lunch but his detached and dismissive stance pushed her into her shell.

‘Tomorrow is Dadi’s birthday. We are having a small, really small party.’ Nothing like your celebrations ‘So, Biplab wanted you to come tomorrow along with Prasanna.’

He had been standing up until now, but now gesturing to her to take a seat, he pulled back his chair and seated himself. She remained standing though. She was leaving anyway.

Sorting out files, he said, ‘What Biplab wants, why should it matter to me?’ He tapped something on his laptop. Then looking at her, he said, ‘Why should I come, because only he wants?’

‘No, I mean...let me rephrase it, Dadi would be happy. Last time, she was unwell, but she likes you. It would be nice to have you there that is if you have time. No pressure.’

He stood again then, as if sitting down while she stood bothered him. All fanciful notions, Kirti!

‘So this waiting so long is all philanthropic business. Biplab...Dadi. Fine, I will not delay any more of your errands. Thank you for waiting. I will have to see if I will be able to make it tomorrow. I will try though.’ He dismissed her.

‘Please do. I will be waiting. For you. And your sister, of course.'