Nazar/ Piansh Stories - Page 36

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Nikki_srk

Not a bad idea...

Anyways, I was just wondering what would be the main talks between the ladies as they seldom used to talk to each other except when fighting or boasting about their powers...

Exactly! 

The idea was epic but we can't really explore it much.


Right now I can only think of Dola suspecting Mo to have an affair and she'll talk to Kala about it. Pr might scold them and call Mo useless who can only use her beauty to lure man. Ved can say in Madhura's tone - Kuch To Sharam Karo. πŸ˜›

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

Exactly! 

The idea was epic but we can't really explore it much.


Right now I can only think of Dola suspecting Mo to have an affair and she'll talk to Kala about it. Pr might scold them and call Mo useless who can only use her beauty to lure man. Ved can say in Madhura's tone - Kuch To Sharam Karo. πŸ˜›

That could be a nice chat between the sisters... Plus Dola can have her trademark "haina Dola"..."haan Dola" too, nahi?

Also, maybe Pr calls Mo useless and then Mo, Dola and K have a battle of words? With a totally unexpected remark by Ved??


Anyways, I also scanned several forums today in search for some inspiration...

Edited by Nikki_srk - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Nikki_srk

That could be a nice chat between the sisters... Plus Dola can have her trademark "haina Dola"..."haan Dola" too, nahi?

Also, maybe Pr calls Mo useless and then Mo, Dola and K have a battle of words? With a totally unexpected remark by Ved??


Anyways, I also scanned several forums today in search for some inspiration...

I had a topic to discuss in the other thread. Interested? 

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

I had a topic to discuss in the other thread. Interested? 

Sure... Why not?

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Posted: 4 years ago

Okay then, I am quoting you there. πŸ˜Š

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Posted: 4 years ago

Nushy!! Am here finally, today was busy as it's our New Year, Gudi PadwaπŸ˜ƒ

So finally you ended the story you started, πŸ˜ƒ

As I mentioned, this definitely becomes a FF.


Firstly, you write brilliantly, flow, emotions, stanzas, in short the nuances ya creative language me bole toh, technicalities.πŸ‘


Coming to the chapter, I quite loved Ansh again confirming with kids, and them being confused. Even loved Pia's emotions train, and Ansh staring in cupboard was epic. Then him sharing the actual story with Pia, the transparency and everything in relation is great.


Loved Piansh's emotional discussion, on how Pia got an offer and her turmoil and Ansh supporting her and she should go ahead, and he took her for granted was also good. They both discussing and talking it out, and it will have it's pros and cons, and then ending on a fun note was very good.


Now, a few critics I do have too,

The childhood part and all was good, but somewhere I felt, it's getting repetitive in your stories. Like yes, you explored a different dimension, maybe that was your plan. Plus this over all flavour I did find of Ansh being at fault, like am not saying a black and white thing, but something like except saving Pia, Ansh has actually done nothing or knows nothing...again this may differ and you may not find it, and I did cos I really appreciate his character a lot, and often we expect a few things from our favs, and the narrator shapes the story and even their favs get in play. So knowingly or unknowingly. Don't take me wrong.

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Posted: 4 years ago

Happy New Year to you Madhura! πŸ€— πŸ₯³ 


Wow! If I get a thumbs up from you for technicalities, then I must have done a really great job! πŸ˜Ž


Well, I did have this issue with the original writers that at points they were focusing too much on the kids' power but when it required an intimate touch, they were always confined to PiyAnsh. It never should have been. I personally liked Episode 219 where Piya hugged Ansh after coming back to the present time but ran towards Adi when he too, came back. 


About transparency, that't what I love most about them. Even when either of them was hesistent, the other would sense the problem in their behavior and come forward to help. So definitely I was gonna go with it. πŸ˜Š


I am glad that you liked the ending. πŸ˜Š


Coming to the critics part.


I am not taking your comment in the wrong way. But I didn't really understand what you meant by pointing Ansh black. Can you elaborate? πŸ˜’


About repetition, even I feel that in all three of my FFs, I have added their childhood essence which might seem repetitive. But I guess, it's because of the lack of insight that the makers showed in original show.


I mean, I still give them a lot of points for trying to keep a balance between the romantic angle and supernatural angle and that they did address the insecurities a couple of times. But if I judge it on a general basis, it was still inadequate. 


You just get to know that you have a six years old daughter and you missed out her whole childhood, it's a lot to take in. But Ansh was rather casual and the focus shifted to their reunion. Then again, Ansh showed isolating himself tendency quite frequently in the post-leap phase. Like in Dev's track he was convinced at first that he shouldn't be with Piya and then the Noble Idiot Saga in Angad's track then again blaming himself for that awful KSR Ansh Track. So at certain points, I did want Piya to question him. 


So I guess, that's the reason these things and the back stories are popping up.


Because I believe, your own experience, specially if you had any horrible experience at your childhood, it does change your perspective and you might behave a bit differently than others.


Like in Grey's Anatomy, if you see Meredith and Richard now - they are an awesome duo but it literally took 6 Seasons for them to get close and even with that, the basic story was same - Richard had an EMA with Ellis (Mer's mother) but how it affected Mer at different points and how her personality become twisted - that was the exploration and a beautiful one. πŸ‘


Again in case of Amelia, basic story is same that her father got shot in front of her eyes and she went to a dark place, became a drug addict in her teenage days and later her fience died of a drug overdose and their baby died. From that point on, she tried becoming sober in complete sense.


But this same story was explored in different episodes in different aspects. Like when the entire crew were busy saving a little kid but she realized how the other kid must have been scared to death because he was the one who shot the boy thinking the gun to be a toy or years later how it still frightens her to conceive a baby - that's where the basic story's aftermath has been shown. 


Phew! I have written a lot to justify my blooper! πŸ˜› 


My point is, they both have been traumatized and again quoting Grey, that for someone who has faced trauma it's the regular things that make them freeze at times. For any other couple, a normal fight wouldn't be this serious. But here the people involved actually have complex with their past and their decisions. So they over-analyzed it and it led to another disaster. 


Honestly, this is not exactly the end I had hoped for. I was thinking to bring Piya in the AD. But since Nikki brought Ansh back, I had to rethink the story that included a proper conversation.


Otherwise, the story might have an alternate ending. πŸ˜Š 

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

Happy New Year to you Madhura! πŸ€— πŸ₯³ 


Wow! If I get a thumbs up from you for technicalities, then I must have done a really great job! πŸ˜Ž


Well, I did have this issue with the original writers that at points they were focusing too much on the kids' power but when it required an intimate touch, they were always confined to PiyAnsh. It never should have been. I personally liked Episode 219 where Piya hugged Ansh after coming back to the present time but ran towards Adi when he too, came back. 


About transparency, that't what I love most about them. Even when either of them was hesistent, the other would sense the problem in their behavior and come forward to help. So definitely I was gonna go with it. πŸ˜Š


I am glad that you liked the ending. πŸ˜Š


Coming to the critics part.


I am not taking your comment in the wrong way. But I didn't really understand what you meant by pointing Ansh black. Can you elaborate? πŸ˜’


About repetition, even I feel that in all three of my FFs, I have added their childhood essence which might seem repetitive. But I guess, it's because of the lack of insight that the makers showed in original show.


I mean, I still give them a lot of points for trying to keep a balance between the romantic angle and supernatural angle and that they did address the insecurities a couple of times. But if I judge it on a general basis, it was still inadequate. 


You just get to know that you have a six years old daughter and you missed out her whole childhood, it's a lot to take in. But Ansh was rather casual and the focus shifted to their reunion. Then again, Ansh showed isolating himself tendency quite frequently in the post-leap phase. Like in Dev's track he was convinced at first that he shouldn't be with Piya and then the Noble Idiot Saga in Angad's track then again blaming himself for that awful KSR Ansh Track. So at certain points, I did want Piya to question him. 


So I guess, that's the reason these things and the back stories are popping up.


Because I believe, your own experience, specially if you had any horrible experience at your childhood, it does change your perspective and you might behave a bit differently than others.


Like in Grey's Anatomy, if you see Meredith and Richard now - they are an awesome duo but it literally took 6 Seasons for them to get close and even with that, the basic story was same - Richard had an EMA with Ellis (Mer's mother) but how it affected Mer at different points and how her personality become twisted - that was the exploration and a beautiful one. πŸ‘


Again in case of Amelia, basic story is same that her father got shot in front of her eyes and she went to a dark place, became a drug addict in her teenage days and later her fience died of a drug overdose and their baby died. From that point on, she tried becoming sober in complete sense.


But this same story was explored in different episodes in different aspects. Like when the entire crew were busy saving a little kid but she realized how the other kid must have been scared to death because he was the one who shot the boy thinking the gun to be a toy or years later how it still frightens her to conceive a baby - that's where the basic story's aftermath has been shown. 


Phew! I have written a lot to justify my blooper! πŸ˜› 


My point is, they both have been traumatized and again quoting Grey, that for someone who has faced trauma it's the regular things that make them freeze at times. For any other couple, a normal fight wouldn't be this serious. But here the people involved actually have complex with their past and their decisions. So they over-analyzed it and it led to another disaster. 


Honestly, this is not exactly the end I had hoped for. I was thinking to bring Piya in the AD. But since Nikki brought Ansh back, I had to rethink the story that included a proper conversation.


Otherwise, the story might have an alternate ending. πŸ˜Š 


Thank you for the wishes, again!!πŸ€—πŸ˜ƒ

Definitely you did.

Well true, and agree.

Coming to critics, I told you didn't paint him black, but overall flavour is he is useless, am not using Euphemism here and telling straight.

You have analysed those tracks, but there were many tracks Pia too messed up. Both suffered equally. It wasn't as casual, to be honest but then let's not get in show discussions, and views can differ.

I would like to give you a suggestion, you could utilise it or not, your choice. Move on! Like accept the show ended, and don't try to just take revenge from Ansh for all mess Creatives did, I believe what's happening in your stories is you are trying to strike that balance of show and mess show had with your story. Instead, take some characterestics from the show, and add a few of yours and make it. Try it from an unbiased and equal views, where both have pros and cons.

Ofc childhood plays a part, and I don't deny that but it got repetitive in your stories, like possibly fireflies had got repetitive in mine. But if you still want to use that, give a few instances and how they coped with them, and make them natural and not one is stronger. There could always be more layers or backstory for Ansh too, if you ask me. But here it seems, read the story with an open mind.

Like Pia had her reasons to blast on Ansh, but Ansh did it just like that, like useless or I dunno. He had no reason, and seemed to do it...now ofc it's normal too, and then again I did confess that the way you connect to Pia, I do to Ansh..but just try doing in a balanced manner.

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Posted: 4 years ago

Okay, about the ending. You also planned something differently, yes you had to change how Nikki had written.Gets challenging.

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Posted: 4 years ago

Okay! Got your point. πŸ‘πŸΌ


But honestly, I feel you have a preconceived notion that I want to take revenge from Ansh. πŸ˜†


It's not like that at all. In fact, nothing can really justify Piya's action in this story too. So what? She just got accepted at a program that didn't suit her and it gave her the right to bash her husband? No way! In my opinion, Ansh was the better spouse in this story because he only gave it back after Piya had crossed her limit. Even at the end, he took the lead and assured her that they'll make it work.


Ansh had every reason to be angry with Piya because she practically called him useless. It's very natural for anyone to reply that they are completely capable of taking care of themselves and they don't need the person accusing them. Now Ansh definitely had no idea that there will be Kohrayan essence and it would send him back to another dimension. So how is he the criminal here? He is rather the victim of the circumstances. 


I have issue with particular tracks and I am being honest here, I had issue with Bhootu and YMMKD at particular tracks too! Those stories were finite so the list is short, Nazar is 400+ episodes so the list is long. And I would be honest, both the writers of the other two shows had planned their stories in a much better way than Gul and Mrinal did. 


So no, I  have no issue with Nazar in general and I am more than happy with the way it ended. πŸ˜ƒ


So far, the stories have been continuation from the show's particular tracks like Pari Revival or Adi-Piya reunion. So I had to work with the information given in the show itself.


I still tried to include Mridul in the revival one and probably I'll add other details in future, considering I get any idea.


Don't get me wrong, but I'll quote your dialogue here. Try reading the stories with an open mind.


You are way too attached with Ansh's character as I feel no matter how much I try to humanize Piya or portray her shortcomings, you always feel I have tried to glorify her and paint Ansh as the black sheep. That's not the case here.


As the writer I have complete clarity on that. If you still feel otherwise, then we can agree to disagree. πŸ˜ŠAfter all every one of us has different way of interpreting the same thing. πŸ˜Š 

Edited by nushy1995 - 4 years ago