Debate Mansion

Marriage dreams when fails !!!

sadashivan thumbnail
Posted: 18 years ago

Marriage and Attraction: Relation is successful as long as there is attraction between the partners. Attraction of actions, attentiveness, beauty, behaviour, caring nature, sexual satisfaction and etc, contribute to prolong relation. Activities to attract partner becomes slow and casual as involves in normal and daily responsibilities leads to escaping the second role. A person has mainly two roles in married life, one for spouse and the other with Job/ responsibilities. Partner and family attraction influences to conduct responsibilities to benefit the family and thus the involvement in responsibilities intensifies that elapses attention to spouse.  Especially women undergo this stage involving intensely in their free services of taking care of children and maintaining house. After reaching from office male partner expects his wife fresh and sexy who is heavily tired of hardship. A disappointment is the major factors for fading attraction towards her. Men too face this situation when they deeply involve themselves in their responsibilities in office or elsewhere. Failure to give time for the family or wife is the serious complaint, woman in the house does not grasp thus blames husband for the negligent behaviour. Both become responsible for dieing away attraction to keep healthy relation. Attraction of partner normally fades as time passes; this is natural and the real truth.  

Marriage and external attraction/infidelity: Fading attraction drives to incline towards fresh and new attractions so can gratify self and fulfil what is lost. Those who are exposed to external environment are easily dragged towards these attractions.  Each woman or man working are exposed to external atmosphere, is bound to hate or approve one of many she/ he meets or contacts as behaviour of an individual influences others to observe and analyse personality as good or bad or so-so; (look, character, action and etc) in all conditions of yes or no or so-so has the ability to attract in negative or positive one to like and another to despise, so-so characters generally lack to attract deeply as becomes normal.  Escaping from this situation is impossible as the brain reacts instantly to beware for right or wrong. The approval indicates the acceptance of personality that matches own. In the offices and other work places spouses meet their colleagues of both sexes. Working men and women spend more on working hours than staying with spouse. Spend most of their day with them eating, chatting, and joking etc; these develop warm relation to step further to get closer. Working woman of strong character having happy married life limits to move forward and strong character with shattered married life will definitely move forward to get closer, will not even care the social impact. On the other hand woman of weak characters are easily motivated to luxury of emotions irrespective of home atmosphere. As far as men are concerned major percentage believe if she agrees I will not miss the golden opportunity but many would wish secretly in order to avoid any clash at home. This is the dream and an expectation of a man, yes, if the relation at home is unsatisfactory becomes journey to heaven. However, no one can stop imagining the dominant personality of colleague (opposite-sex). That means colleague's personality has influenced enough to remember and entered in the life. Now working woman/ man maintains relation with two, one physical relation and the other in imagination. The comparison of spouse and the colleague begins, environmental effect of home and spouse if is stronger he/she inclines towards home and if not the affection starts with the colleague. Colleague's initiation helps to establish union, some manage secret relation and some dare to get rid of old relationship. Sexual appetite is essential need of an adult. Some are content and some have great desire due to genetic characteristic, for them controlling sexual desire is very difficult. They need to extinguish their hunger so are in hunt for buddy. Most women control their sexual desire despite inadequate sexual appetite; such people are normally upset, restless, tedious and etc; in their life. Sexual appetite is natural process connected with our body and brain functioning, as the relief is by the process of releasing so controlling is not normal can lead to major psychological diseases such as depression, sickness and lifelessness etc; are enough to invite blood pressure, mental and physical problems etc.  

Reasons for a woman and man to get involved in extra marital relation may be as I feel: 

  1. Powerful emotional and physical attraction of a colleague or other associate pulls the mind and heart to submit.
  2. Dissatisfaction and boring emotional and physical relation with spouse leads extra marital relation. Dull life especially women live in home waiting long-long for spouse.
  3. Lack of motivation for deep involvement in home activities.
  4. Fading spouse's sexual attraction is a step to establish extra marital relation.
  5. For woman it is also revenge the spouse in cruel relation.
  6. Genetic characteristics of individual for emotional and sexual desire for more sex, variety, addiction, curiosity, drawing opposite sex's attention to become special.
  7. Open mind for the relation. "Ok, I do not mind having extra relation as we now in modern society".
  8. Weak and submissive behaviour to submit to other's intentions.

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