So, you see, this was no love at first sight situation or whatever either. Those storywriters are lying to you all about that too. I mean if you know what love is, you know that it is impossible to fall in love just after taking one look at a person. It took me 4 years to comprehend my feelings for her. Don't tell me it only takes some people 5 seconds. That's complete bull.
Anyway, at that point, I was in a complete dilemma and I wasn't sure of how I felt about her. Maybe she simply looked refreshing after months of not seeing her. Or maybe I just missed her as a friend and was disappointed to know that in our last year together, we wouldn't see each other as often as we used to. Whatever it was, I didn't know, and I tried my best not to care.
I had other responsibilities on my shoulders which involved getting into the topmost colleges of the country and writing brilliant essays which would enable me to do just that. I had to make my parents proud of me. After all, they had come to America years ago in the hopes that their children could take advantage of the country of opportunities. I wasn't going to let a girl get in the way. Especially a girl who I had no chance of being with in the future.
I had my mind set completely on how this year was going to be and that was that.
Then why did I go to Kriti, Sahana's best friend, towards the end of the day and ask for Sahana's screen name?
Honestly, this love crap is the most poisonous thing ever. You're just hurt all the time and you can never devote yourself to one thing completely. That person's thoughts seem to emerge out of nowhere in the end and you just get aggravated all the time.
Yet, when it's new, and you don't know the pain it's going to give you later, you succumb to your feelings and end up doing the most foolish things. Like getting her screen name from her best friend all randomly just so you could talk to her.
Once I had finished all my school work and ate dinner, I sat on the computer and stared at my list of friends. She had to be a normal teenager and sign on eventually, right?
Playing a game of Solitaire, I occupied myself until I realized it was time to pray the final prayer of the day. As I sat on my prayer mat, I thought of what she did when she got home. Did she hang out with her friends until late? Or did she sit home and help her mom around the house? What were her hobbies? I smiled, imagining her sitting on a large sofa, reading a book, completely immersed. It seemed like the type of thing she would do.
I was still thinking of this when my younger brother, Faisal, came in and sat down on his own prayer mat. He gave me an odd look and raised his eyebrows.
"Having fun praying?"
I wiped the smile off my face and shrugged. "Why not? Anyway, you shouldn't interrupt when someone is praying."
He hid a smile as he put his hands in front of him and closed his eyes.
I let out a deep breath of relief that he hadn't asked any more questions. And this time, I focused solely on God.
When I went back on the computer, I decided I would shut down the computer and forget about Sahana. I had risked my brother getting suspicious and he had a big mouth. There was no point putting my neck on the line again.
However, as luck would have it, when I went back on, Sahana was online. Life was so unfair. When I was waiting for her, she wouldn't sign on. When I had determined to sign off, she came. She was freaking taunting me. Debating on what to do, I moistened my lips and sat down.
To instant message or not to instant message. That was the question. What was the answer?
Unable to bridle the temptation, I clicked on Sahana88.
Sahana88: hey Rahil
Rahil1357: i hope u don't mind i have ur sn
Sahana88: no its fine
Rahil1357: oh ok…so what are u doing?
Sahana88: served dinner a while back...decided to read this book i got from the library but it was pretty boring so came online…you?
Rahil1357: oh i was just working out…decided to take a break…
I hated lying like anything but I couldn't tell her the truth. Hey Sahana, I was waiting for you to come online. Yep, working out was definitely a better choice.
Rahil1357: so…um what book were you reading?
Sahana88: The Da Vinci Code
Rahil1357: thats an awesome book
Sahana88: yea…sure…that's why I read the first chapter and was struggling not to fall asleep
Rahil1357: as you continue, it'll get better. so keep on reading it
Sahana88: alright i'll give it another shot if you say so…
Rahil1357: good…hey you know what other book u should read?
And so the conversation continued for 47 minutes. I learned more about Sahana in those 47 minutes than what I had known about her in 4 years. She loved to read and write, and had even written a book. I asked her to send the story to me but she refused, saying it wasn't that great. I'm sure it was though.
I also found out that she had a small family of 4, which included her parents, her older brother, and her. However, she had a large extended family, and all of them lived in New York. She thought the best times of the year when her cousins would get together at gatherings and laugh the night away telling anecdotes of what had happened to them.
I also learned that Sahana wanted to pursue a career in law and had wanted to do so since she was in 4th grade. I wondered how this was possible though since she was so quiet most of the time. I'm sure she had a lot to say but it didn't seem like she really wanted to talk. There was this indifference in her personality that was alluring yet frustrating. I couldn't figure out whether she wanted to talk to me further or was trying to get rid of me with her impassive responses. I'm sure it's not surprising to know that I kept on making conversation either way.
That night, I went to sleep, content at heart, for some undistinguishable reason. It's not like we had shared any romantic moment. In fact, we were basic with our conversation, revolving everything around school and future plans of education. Nevertheless, I still went to bed with a smile playing on my lips.
Topic started by Neelam08
Last replied by umrao_jaan