What is Maryada?

My pea sized brain is unable to grasp the meaning of the word Maryada coined by Anu Deviji. Today she said she and Anuj stayed in Maryada during their courtship period. So what's exactly is this Maryada? She slapped P, criticized V and Baa for questioning her friendship with Anuj. She claimed she feels for Anuj the same way she feels for Devika. But within few days she was dreaming Anuj lying on her lap. Once she once ditched the friend zone, she grabbed the Maryada zone. During this Maryada phase she lived with Anuj in the same house, hugged him, kissed on his hand and let him kiss her on hand and forehead. So what's exactly Maryada? No sex? If it means no sex or smooch, then what was Pakhi's fault? She was not having sex with Adhik. She said she not only gave importance to her prem but also to her pehchaan? Does pehchaan mean cleaning and mopping ex in laws place? She said P has never done anything sensible in her life. So what does P need to do to be considered as mature sensible woman? Get married then divorced and live in ex husband's house? Yeh Maryada cheez Hain Kya? Kya hai yeh pehchaan? saamajhdaari Hoti Kya koi hume samjhao.

Originally posted by: MOTHERHOOD

My pea sized brain is unable to grasp the meaning of the word Maryada coined by Anu Deviji. Today she said she and Anuj stayed in Maryada during their courtship period. So what's exactly is this Maryada? She slapped P, criticized V and Baa for questioning her friendship with Anuj. She claimed she feels for Anuj the same way she feels for Devika. But within few days she was dreaming Anuj lying on her lap. Once she once ditched the friend zone, she grabbed the Maryada zone. During this Maryada phase she lived with Anuj in the same house, hugged him, kissed on his hand and let him kiss her on hand and forehead. So what's exactly Maryada? No sex? If it means no sex or smooch, then what was Pakhi's fault? She was not having sex with Adhik. She said she not only gave importance to her prem but also to her pehchaan? Does pehchaan mean cleaning and mopping ex in laws place? She said P has never done anything sensible in her life. So what does P need to do to be considered as mature sensible woman? Get married then divorced and live in ex husband's house? Yeh Maryada cheez Hain Kya? Kya hai yeh pehchaan? saamajhdaari Hoti Kya koi hume samjhao.

Pata nahi chal kya raha hai is fattichar serial me..par ye post padhkar by god majja aa gaya😆

Originally posted by: MOTHERHOOD

My pea sized brain is unable to grasp the meaning of the word Maryada coined by Anu Deviji. Today she said she and Anuj stayed in Maryada during their courtship period. So what's exactly is this Maryada? She slapped P, criticized V and Baa for questioning her friendship with Anuj. She claimed she feels for Anuj the same way she feels for Devika. But within few days she was dreaming Anuj lying on her lap. Once she once ditched the friend zone, she grabbed the Maryada zone. During this Maryada phase she lived with Anuj in the same house, hugged him, kissed on his hand and let him kiss her on hand and forehead. So what's exactly Maryada? No sex? If it means no sex or smooch, then what was Pakhi's fault? She was not having sex with Adhik. She said she not only gave importance to her prem but also to her pehchaan? Does pehchaan mean cleaning and mopping ex in laws place? She said P has never done anything sensible in her life. So what does P need to do to be considered as mature sensible woman? Get married then divorced and live in ex husband's house? Yeh Maryada cheez Hain Kya? Kya hai yeh pehchaan? saamajhdaari Hoti Kya koi hume samjhao.

I guess, this is the definition of maryada for Anupama.😉

If Pakhi and Adhik peeled matar together in a closed room, Would that be violation of maryada

Anyways, in today's episode, Anu trying to make Pakhi understand about career building and education was fine. But as a mother, she did not know giving gyaan at this time would not work. Was it necessary to argue with her at that time only and in front of everyone? Was that a lecture or seminar in which everyone's presence was mandatory? Initially, when pakhi was of that age when she could be molded or counseled, anupama used to behave like helpless woman in front of her. Moreover, Pakhi did not say that she wanted to marry Adhik?

Till age of 50, parents whose hormones are still overactive instead of trying to understand emotions and feelings of their young daughter are shouting and giving lectures.

Where was Anu's lecture book when Toshu's marriage was finalizing. He had not any job at that time. Leave that time, even now, when he is going to become a father, he is not settled.

Was Samar settled when he got engaged? Did anyone from Shah's family realize this thing?

Mr shah ne kaunsa sensible kaam kiya hai- shouting, screaming, yelling, using bad language in front of his daughter😆

What do they expect from pakhi then??

If you take Anupama and Anuj's relationship, it bloomed after she was out of her abusive relationship unlike Vanraj and Kavya who were in relationship while Anu and Vanraj were a married couple. The maryada is a thin line between a man and woman that should be respected. VanYa didn't respect that while Vanraj was a married man with three kids that's why their marriage is not a happy one. You cannot be happy hurting others. Anupama was hurt that inspite of the fact that she was Vanraj's wife, Vanraj had a relationship with another woman. Housewives this age can bear anything but no one can bear a souten. It's not her fault Vanraj loved someone else while she was being a responsible mother, daughter-in-law serving her sasural. You need two people to take care of a marriage as it's very easy to break.

Anyways, now if we see Anupama's and Anuj's friendship which was built on care, trust, and samMaan(respect which she didn't get). This led her to be confident, to go out and find herself and also see what is good and what is bad. She got married to Anuj with dignity. What has Pakhi achieved so far in her life? She is 20-year old brat who is looking out for herself. She is fascinated by the high standard living at the Kapadias and she wants that life to get out of the Shah family. She is not in love, she wants out, that's it! This is very normal behavior coming from a school graduate. She hasn't seen the world as of yet, she doesn't know how people are. That's what Anupama is saying, ki pehle kuch bano fir relationship kro. Relationship may be for some people, but in student life its not benefitting at that age because fir padhayi mein dhyan nhi lagega, time waste hoga (speaking from experience). With age, she will understand what she is doing..that's what Anupama is trying to explain her.

There is no harm in having male friends but what Pakhi and Adhik were doing is wrong. If you want to talk, you can talk in front of everyone. If you have to do something alone, that means you're doing something wrong. Sara and Samar are also around the same age, are they behaving like Pakhi and Adhik? No. They know how complicated things will be with relationship, that's what Pakhi is not seeing. It has nothing to do with controlling the life of a girl and letting boys fall in love. Falling in love is not a joke, it should be done responsibly just like drinking. Here Vanraj's reaction is very normal, no father will like his daughter to get close to any boy at that age which is obvious that things can go sexual later if not stopped now. He has grown up from that stage too, he knows, but yes I agree he could have talked to both of them first instead of creating a scene in front of everyone. Just like how Sara and Samar were respecting the Maryada by meeting in front of everyone else, Pakhi and Adhik should too..

I too do not know what Pakhi & Adhik were up to. Were they getting intimate behind closed doors?

If so, any parent would go berserk if they witnessed their 18/19/20 yr old in that situation.

But, what I would hate to see is - if they are creating a ruckus because Pakhi is a girl.

Did Anupama say that Pakhi needs to have pehchaan before Pakhi can be in a relationship? As a mother she might be right, but should word it differently to indicate on what Pakhi's focus & priority could be.

But, very hypocritical of Anu to speak of pehchan. She needs a mirror to look at herself before calling out others for the lack of one!

Vanraj & maryada are poles apart. All said & done - these are not things that can be taught to children. Parents must themselves be examples for the kids to follow. And we all know what kind of examples both Anu & V are!😕

It looked quiet obvious that there were going to be intimate behind closed doors and at the nick of time Vanraj came to stop them. Again, it has nothing to do with the fact that Pakhi is a girl. The problem is she is alone in a closed room with a guy she hardly knows even if he is her distant relative. In India, this is a big thing, because of the society that discriminates between girl and boy.

Yes Anupama did speak about having a pehchaan first (do something in life) before getting into a relationship. Toshu and Samar got into relationship after they finished their school education). 20 year is not a good time to get into relationship, it serves like a distraction from building their career. Anupama told her to wait for the correct time to be in a relationship and meanwhile build her career just like Anuj waited 26 years.

I also agree that parents are supposed to set a good example in front of kids that's why divorce is looked down upon in India. Marriage is supposed to be for lifetime. Children will follow what parents do, which is what Pakhi is calling them out. This is what Vanraj will realize that as parents, we are supposed to be careful with our actions because children follow us.

From what i see Pakhi has no idea adhik has bad intentions to love her. She thinks adhik genuinely likes her like anuj loved anupama 26 years. Not pakhi fault if she trusts adhik. Did not anupama trust vanraj 26 years and than only opened her eyes. Love is blind.

But i think pakhi likes Adhik wealth of kapadias and their bungalow than adhik himself. We cannot compare samar and sara relationship of maryada because they are not in love yet. I am sure when Sara loves samar all hell will break in kapadia house as Samar and Sahhs are not their class as per Barkha and ankush and even Adhik. They will all shout at Sara just like pakhi being shouted by Shahs. No parent or sibling or uncle/aunty want their daughter or sister to fall in love with lesser class people or with misbehaving kind of people like Shahs. Class is not only about wealth its a familys culture and behaviour and full city knows Shahs culture and crass behaviours. So which parent or brother like adhhik want his daughter or sister to marry in Shahs not anyone. Rakhi does not like Shahs and kinjal marrying Toshu and shes right somewhere. Which one of us in real life want our sisters or brothers or daughters marrying into Shah family answer honestly? None is it not? Looking at behaviour of majority Shahs no one want their kids or siblings marrying them.

Vanraj Baa bapuji and anupama may not accept this but no good family will be ready for marriage in their family because of all their characters and past. Same way Ankush and Barkha will not accept Samar and Shahs for Saara not only because they are not rich but their characters and way of behaviour is not good in society. Even today in asia or world people see more than money and richness character of family. Shahs will be lowest placed based on how all behave there. Adhik is better that way ankush is good human, sara is good and so is anuj kapadia, Malvika and GK. Only barkha is a bit after money but otherwise Kapadia are much better in culture and character compared to Shahs if any person looks from outside. I do not consider Adhik as a kapadia but hes better than Vanraj and Baa and Toshu. But still most of adhik family are better humans than Pakhis. So adhik family must be tensed about pakhi coming to their family than other way or sara marrying in Shahs.

We cannot compare anuj anupama love story with adhik pakhi because they are 45 year olds when they married not 20 year old kids. At 45 years love is different its more about compatibility than wealth or attraction etc unless its someone like Vanraj who has ulterior motives for loving Malvika or kavya thats to take advantage of them or their wealth

Its not necessary that if parents are bad than kids will follow them. Many bad people or criminals have good kids and vice versa. But in Shah family this rule does not really hold good except for Samar may be. With Saamr too way he behaved with nandini was very bad throwing rings at her etc

Anupama wanted to say when anuj and anupama were jiust friends to dono dosti ka maan rakha

Ar unke jo relationship they woh dosti ke daayra mein hi tha

Pakhi said that adhik and she are just friend t but anupama ne dekha ki pakhi और adhik close as a that both are getting close to each other

a anupama wanted to say ki jub tuk Anupama aur anuj friend they tub tuk anuj और

Anupama ke relationship friend ship ke daayra mein hi tha

Friends ship ke relationship mein rehkar anupama aur anuj ne lovers ki tarah act nahi kiya tha

May be anupama wanted to say if pakhi and adhik are just friend to friend ke daayra mein hi rehna chahiye

After anuj accident anupama ko laga ki ab anuj uska dost nahi balki pyaar hai to anupama ne friend ship ki maryaada tod di and she started getting informal with anuj

Originally posted by: radhika_2001

It looked quiet obvious that there were going to be intimate behind closed doors and at the nick of time Vanraj came to stop them. Again, it has nothing to do with the fact that Pakhi is a girl. The problem is she is alone in a closed room with a guy she hardly knows even if he is her distant relative. In India, this is a big thing, because of the society that discriminates between girl and boy.

Yes Anupama did speak about having a pehchaan first (do something in life) before getting into a relationship. Toshu and Samar got into relationship after they finished their school education). 20 year is not a good time to get into relationship, it serves like a distraction from building their career. Anupama told her to wait for the correct time to be in a relationship and meanwhile build her career just like Anuj waited 26 years.

I also agree that parents are supposed to set a good example in front of kids that's why divorce is looked down upon in India. Marriage is supposed to be for lifetime. Children will follow what parents do, which is what Pakhi is calling them out. This is what Vanraj will realize that as parents, we are supposed to be careful with our actions because children follow us.

Why so you keep pretending what pakhi did is wrong? Its only wrong for sexist regressive people. Why does she need to achieve something before taking a normal decision for a 20 year old?

And don't backtrack, its 100% because pakhi is a woman. If she was a boy you won't have this thinking and won't write paragraphs defending it

Next what, she should achieve something before eating and drinking water too? You need a pechan before eating pizza? Once again an adult getting into a relationship is demonized. Once again grown women are infantalized

In india its a big thing because people keep defending regressive things and keep making excuses for it

Once widow burning was also a regular thing. Imagine if people had been making such excuses then - but killing widow is totally India's culture. Its ok. We would still have innocent women burned

Saying its india its india doesn't make the series less regressive

The makers chose to show this. They chose to write this

Also its always weird to me that people only have these excuses when such regressive things happen. Are extra maritial affairs a regular thing? Yet every hindi series has it. Are super rich people and all houses being bungalows a regular thing in india? Yet every series has it

So makers can add non regular things when it comes to extra maritial affairs but when it comes to women its always regressiveness and more regressiveness with people defending such things