Mere Paas Tum Ho v/s Kaamna

Yaay!! I finally saw Mere Paas tum ho, the Pakistani drama. Kaamna is said to be inspired from Mere paas tum ho. I am really not that good at binge watching.. so a series of 23 episodes took more than 2 months to complete.

I saw this to compare both the shows.. I was genuinely  curious of this show after the topic by @~Raina~

At first I was going to write long rant but now I decided against it. I'll write it in parts

First I'll go with characters and then just the general decisions both the shows made and finally overall opinion.

Disclaimer: These are just my opinions and I don't claim that my opinion is better than anyone else. I am also open to a nice healthy debate if anyone wants to .

Danish Vs Manav

Yaay!! Let’s start with what I know will make most people angry. I do not like Danish that much. Ok so now that that is out. Let me explain

Danish: He is played by Humayun Saeed, who is a well liked actor according to what I heard. This not against the actor, but the character he played. I just did not like him much. Especially in the beginning.. but even till the end I did not like him much. I felt sorry for him. He is really good actor, so in many scenes I cried when he was in pain. Etc…etc.. But still, just because I felt sorry for him, it doesn’t change the fact that I really did not like him.

As a government employee: He was an honest government employee but they always show that he is honest because of his Abbu(father). And most confusing is the first episode where he did take a bribe for that stupid necklace. And then after some episode he is all about not taking the bribe because the road was not well done.. The problem here is, I couldn’t understand his stand. It was not written clearly. See, His father’s reasoning to not partake in corruption was correct. He, as a government employee had a huge responsibility towards government and people of his country. But Danish did not exactly realize the meaning behind it properly. He was doing it out of fear and respect towards his father. He always says.. “Abba khwab mei aayenge aur poochenge” Respecting your elders is right.. but please understand what they are really saying and then do it. Danish was not really able to understand it, and that was why his honestly was wavering… fear is never a strong base. Yes, he later did not take the 10 lakhs when he saw that the road was not done and he had to sign some document related to it. But what about the first bribe he took for that stupid necklace. That was also something bad. He never thought about it which makes me think that he was not really smart. He is not really able to understand the reality.And there is that line, “Yeh meri mehnat nahi.. meri keemat hai” which he says to Mehwish when he gets the 10 lakhs bribe. Even then, he couldn’t understand the message that his father gave. He is still not getting that he is answerable to the people of the country. He felt it was insulting him on a personal level as he had a price tag on him. I still wonder if he did not see the incomplete road,then would he sign the document or not.

As a Husband: Now, the other thing which I did not like about him was that he was not likable as a husband. He was controlling, possessive and maybe even a little bit of a jerk. Oh! I commented once in this forum that I thought Manav had a patriarchal mindset… but that is almost nothing compared to Danish. This was why it took me so much time to complete this series; in the beginning he was definitely irritating to say the least. Ok your wife is beautiful and many people flirt with her but dude, why are you getting so worked up. Just because someone is flirting with her doesn’t mean that she is going to fall in love with that stranger. And there is no need to ‘protect’ her from everyone.. no need to have fist fight.. Yes, of course, if she says that she is uncomfortable with the flirting, you can help her. But till then she can protect herself. The way Danish acted always made me feel that he had trust issues. He did not believe in Mehwish much. He was always scared that Mehwish will leave him anytime. And the whole debacle around, “Nangi kamar wali blouse”and the dance with Shehwar. Maybe it was the feminist inside me… but I always get irritated with his dialogues reasoning his patriarchal mindset. “ladki meinaa karni ki jurat aajaye na, usse koi bhi fateh nai kar skta”  I just don’t like these dialogues. It reeks of toxic masculinity. “Poocho mere paas kya anmol cheez hai… mere paas tum ho Mehwish”Maybe I am the most unromantic person in the world because I really would not like to be called ‘cheez’ no matter how much ‘anmol’ I am. I was actually rooting for Mehwish to leave him. Yes, he is giving her whatever she wants, he is desperately trying to make her the happiest wife in the world but still in fear that she will leave him and not out of love. Maybe I am reading too much deep into it. He even stops her from working because he s scared that someone would ‘steal’ her. Heck, she can not even take a lift from a guy without his permission. There were many people in the comment section that they wanted a husband just like Danish and I felt like the only one praying that my husband better not be like him.

As a Father: I also did not like him as a father. He was a caring father but only during the happy days. He was such an emotionally unavailable father that I just wanted to hit him. Yes, the one whom you loved so much left you for someone else. You are heartbroken. But your son also woke up to a morning in which his mother was not there. He was also feeling abandoned by his mother, the one who cared for him till now, the one who took care of all his needs.  Just try imagining his pain… but nooope you pain is just more painful. His depressed,emotionally distant personality forced the poor 6 year old to mature fast to even suggest his father to put him in boarding to reduce his father’s pressure.And stupid Danish, instead of thinking about the reason behind his son’s request, he is like cool… let me just dwell in my suffering first. Thanks Son. Then he was called by his son’s school to discuss about his son’s decreasing performance he had the audacity to compare his pain with his son’s. “You are just thinking of your pain… but my pain is more because if a wife leaves you she is not your wife anymore…but even when a mother leaves you she is still your mother” Dude… this is not a competition about who has more pain. Do your duty as father.. Seriously I hated him more as father when compared to him as a husband. Again the comment section is like, Roomi and Danish bond is so pure.. Yeah,no thanks to that stupid father.. It is because of the Son.. only because of him.. Roomi is such an angel… he is caring and understanding.

So, now that you guys read about Danish, my views on Manav

Manav: He is played by Abhishek Rawat. I have not seen him before in any series but know about shows he was a part of like agle janam mohebitiya hi kijo and service wali bahu.. I am happy that the writers of this show got their chance to correct many things from Danish character while sketching the Manav character

As a government employee: Definitely a tremendous improvement from Danish. Yes, he is doing it because of his father but he is also doing it because he knows the responsibility he has. There are some comments saying that he is unrealistically idealist but I disagree. He is idealist but definitely a relatable character. He is only concerned about his work. He not going and stopping others from corruption. He is not poking his nose where it doesn’t belong. But he will not partake in corruption because he believes in doing so.That is why I feel he is relatable. The bribery arc was handled much better in the Indian version. He did get tempted but the temptation just lasted for just few hours. He actions were more based on his strong sense of righteousness rather that the fear. That was why he was not wavering in his stand. And he returned the bribe but still extended the time period for the stalls to move out. Here,it is not bad because his ideals are not too rigid. Because, in the end, a person’s humanity is much more important than his ideals and morals, isn’t it?

As a husband: Better than Danish here also… but still has that patriarchy after all.. come on, we can not really avoid that after all.  Manav as a husband is much more emotionally available partner, less controlling and less possessive. He tries to find out the reason behind his wife’s depressed state and tries o fix it. He is comfortable in leaving Akanksha to fend for herself in case of unnecessary attention.He is happy for her when she decides to re-start her modeling career. But… he is not exactly free of the patriarchal mindset also. It is really subtle… That is why when I commented about that many people did not like it. Through Manav’s action we see that he somehow thinks that he is the provider and the wife is care giver. He is really not able to see himself as co-caregiver and co-provider. He does not see that these duties are to be shared equally by both of then instead of dividing it among themselves. He is creating silos. When Akanksha begins pestering him about the bungalow he does not even suggest her to be his partner, get a job and together, let’s strive for this mansion. Instead after getting defeated in front her ‘zid’ he decides to shoulder the whole burden on himself because he is the sole provider after all. And when Akanksha starts working, the moment some problem arises in the household, he blames Akanksha for being unable to manage both the duties properly. Yes, he does ‘try’ to help in kitchen but that is superficial help compared to moral support. There was an incident when Yathu was locked out of the house and Akanksha couldn’t pick up his call. Here, he scolds her for her irresponsible behavior which is ok. But what is not O.K is that they did not discuss what they should do to avoid such things in future. He did not for a second think that now, he better teach Yathu his phone number also, because Akku might face a similar situation even in the future. He can become the care giver when a similar situation arrives in the future. No… Akanksha should be able to avoid such problems in the future as she is the only care giver of the family after all. See.. all these actions make me think that he has a light problem of patriarchal mindset..it is subtle but still there. But he is better than Danish because he does notsee Akanska his ‘sabse amnol cheez’ but that his ‘kismat achi hai ki Akankshameri zindagi mei aayi’. Call me strange, but words like these have much more impact. Akanksha is not something he owns but a living breathing human being who came to share her life with him. Yes, Mehwish also chose Danish as her partner and was a human being etc..etc.. but words do have some impact after all.The jealousy is also handled here much better. When Manav finally realizes that Vaibhav is having ill intentions towards his wife, he is furious. But here, we can understand that he believed Akanksha.. he trusted herself to defend herself. But this time he does not doubt on Akanksha’s fidelity but is scared for her as she could fall in some trap. She, unlike him, is unaware of the conniving nature of Vaibhav Kapoor. This time Manav’s fear is justified.

As a father: Again, it was really good…so much better than Danish.. but not without any faults. He is really an attentive parent. He puts Yathu’s pain in front of him.. helps Yathu get over his worst fears. He is so much better than Danish.. but then Manav’s problem comes back. Manav have the problem of providing everything to his loved ones even when some of the demands seem to be absurd. Just like Akanksha’s  bungalow we see that Yathu have Sakshi maam. Itis really absurd that Sakshi can not go to a working woman’s hostel and still visit Yathu time to time and help him overcome his fears. There is no need for her to stay in their home to treat Yathu. But now Manav unconsciously chose Sakshi to be the new care giver for his child. He does not still understand it.But they are still doing the provider-caregiver equation unknowingly. He is scared that Sakshi and Yathu are going too close but he not realizing that he is the one unconsciously encouraging that bond to grow stronger. He can not say no to loved ones.. he always yields to any absurd demand be it buying an expensive bungalow or letting a stranger grow close to his child. Love does not mean fulfilling every demand.. if that was the case, then many kids did not get proper love. How many times a kid have been denied of something? Maybe because of financial reasons or maybe health issues or maybe just so unrelated personal reason… but everyone have been denied of something or the other in their lifetime. They move on. Life makes the move on after all. But Manav unconsciously protects Yathu from the reality of denial. Maybe I am over thinking it.

Mehwish v/s Akanksha

Now here, this is interesting. I like Mehwish a little bit more than Akanksha but when I think about it, comparing Mehwish and Akanksha is like comparing apples and oranges.

This is going to be short. So let’s start with Akanksha this time.

Akanksha:  She is played by Chandini Sharma. The reason I wanted to start with Akanksha is because of the simple reason that she is not one of the leads of the show. Yes,the show’s name is based on her name, ‘Kaamna’ which Vaibhav gave her but the show is defiantly not about her. The Pakistani drama was about a couple who separated due to their different ideology but the Indian show is about two men with opposing ideologies fighting among themselves. Oh! And a stupid woman gets caught in the middle. Akanksha is just a materialistic and stupid woman. She does not have her own identity. If anyone asks her tell me about yourself, 5different times, she would 5 distinct answers. And it is not her fault. The show writers were not clear with her character sketch from the beginning. They just had 2 personality traits, those were materialistic and stupid. She does not have her set of ideals or morals. She can be easily manipulated. She does not value love be it familial love or romantic love. She is so written so poorly compared to her counterpart that it feels so bad for the actress. She was a loving and caring mother but then turns into a psycho mother who scares the hell out the child. In the beginning we see her a slightly more intelligent… planning before a second child.. talking about divorce in non-judgmental way.. but then she becomes whiny.. Apathetic… Dumb… Selfish… We learn that she has never learned of hard work because of her stupid dad. She won Miss Indore because her dad bribed the judges… so in a way she was stupid because of her dad.. for her everything she wanted was served in front of her in a satin pillow. That was just the way of life. Life always favored her because she was the center of the universe. There was no need for her to earn anything. So when her husband pampers her so much she does not feel anything out of ordinary.. after all she should be treated like that. And when a handsome millionaire proposes her and promises to provide her with everything, she does not think that she have to take an action. It is just universe is pampering her as usual. And interestingly she is not thinking that she is a beautiful woman and that is why this is happening. No… The universe favors her because of who she is . Just because she is special. She can understand that people can feel jealous of her after all she is special, but she cannot accept the fact that there are people who do not like her. How can her son hate her? How can her mother hate her? How can her sister hate her? There must be something wrong.. after all the universe loves her… she is special.. Even in her mind, She did not choose Vaibhav.. universe gave her Vaibhav.  That is why I say she is not a lead in this show. She is a side character who lives in her own delusional world. I am sure if Niharika never came, she would just a happy person. She does not care about things like Vaibhav’s love or her families love or her child’s future.. as long as she can live in luxury. She just do not want hardships in life because hardships do not exist for special people after all.

Mehwish: She is played by Ayesha Khan. She is defiantly really beautiful. But Here is the key difference. She is a beauty with brains. Not just that she had class. She had her ideals and moral. In fact she was a person. She was the 2nd lead of the show. She was not manipulated. She understands everything. And she makes her decision not the universe. She knows that she is beautiful and her self-awareness was strength. She was ready to earn her dreams. She was ready to face hardships but when she saw there was away to avoid those hardships she just chose to do that. She knew the consequences of her actions. She knows that she is not that center of the universe. People can hate her for what she did. But she chose to be hated by many not-so-rich people. She understands that Shehwar Ahmad likes her only for her beauty but she accepted it as a sacrifice. In return, she would get all the materialistic things that she craved for. She was a capable woman. In fact if she was married to Manav, then there would have not been an affair at all,as Manav would have supported her to pursue any career of choice from the beginning of their marriage. We see her saving the money for herself for that stupid necklace. She is ready to earn only if her husband (Danish) was not overly protective and trusted her more.  If she was married to Manav, She would have enjoyed their marriage much more because she was a woman who appreciates respect along with love. She would have liked a sense of freedom. We can see that when Mehwish is treated poorly by Shehwar when there was a company crisis.She does not say it aloud but she definitely would not have tolerated it second time. And she did not. When Shehwar rejected her after his wife’s return, it was not a woman who was cheated; it was the woman who lost her gamble. She gambled with her life knowing fully well that it was a gamble. Maybe I am giving her much more credit than she deserves because of my bias towards Danish. But Is till feel Mehwish chose that path as she felt slightly suffocated and was blinded the riches. Although she appreciated the efforts by Danish to make her happy she was also unable to express her dissatisfaction. She wanted to change her fate herself. When her son refuses to meet her, she is hurt and angry. But she does not suspect even once that her husband poisoned her son’s mind. She understands that her son is angry at her. She just wants time to persuade him.And unlike Akanksha she also understands that the child she abandoned will not be easily swayed by expensive gifts, she just wants to spend time with him to make him like her back, that too, only during weekends. She threatened her ex-husband, made her lover threaten him again but when she learned that she cannot have it her way then, she decided to wait until Roomi is ready. That is why I felt that Mehwish is a lady with class. Unlike Akanksha, who is refusing to accept realty and whines most of the time.

I’m speechless. In comparison of both shows -  You have analysed every character with each other so brilliantly  👏  

Waiting for Shehwar - Vaibhav, Roomi - Yathu etc

Would it be right to compare Salman - Khushalji? 

Enjoyed reading your posts. I still haven’t watched Mere Paas Tum Ho, but still enjoyed the comparison

I think for a Pakistani show mehwish was much better written than Akanksha.The patriarchal mind set of Danish is to be expected its in line with most of their shows.

So beautifully penned 👏

And yathu is so overacting

Rumi was way cooler

And sakshis role was way better played in mere pass tum ho.

Sakshi is becoming bossy!

Last but not least, when is vaibhavs wife showing up!

That woman was amazing....

Shehwar v/s Vaibhav

Finally, a post where I can say many good points instead of bitching. I loved both the characters. I have said that comparing Akanksha and Mehwish is like comparing apples and oranges. So, Here comparing these two men are like comparing the Jokers of batman films. Some like Jack Nicholson while others like Heath Ledger. But what we are forgetting is that both the versions were perfect fit for the movies they were in. They were the perfect villains for their heroes. Like a square peg in a square hole. Similarly Shehwar and Vaibhav, were perfect for the premise of the show. So let’s start:

Shehwar: He is played by Adnan Siddiqui. I don’t know much about him but God!! He is so handsome. No… He has a presence. He exudes an aura of class… of intelligence… of charm. He is a magician of words. When I first saw him, he felt like Jakie sheriff or Amithab Bachchan.. There was an important air around him. And when he flirts… it feels hypnotizing.. So contrasting compared to Danish, who, by his own accord, is a man of few words. Shehwar was just a businessman. He had a wife who was living separately from him. He was not divorced yet.. but he was lonely. When he first meets Mehwish with her friend, then he flirts with her.. just a casual flirting.. nothing too deep. Mehwish was a little bit intrigued but again nothing too significant.. It was in their second meeting that things started to move.. even before the dance.. it was when they were talking to each other. He was quick to catch that she was somewhat dissatisfied with her life at that moment. And He was intrigued by this beautiful and smart woman. And then rest is history.

When you actually think about his.. his style is simple.. he just talks and listens.. he even listens when it is not uttered.. Mehwish was attracted that kind of attention. Yes, he flatters her.. but his attention is also kind of flattery. Interestingly, I don’t think it was just her beauty that attracted him. Yes, of course she was gorgeous.. she was too beautiful.. but she also had sense of class… her eyes had some kind of spark ..Shehwar saw in her beautiful companion with whom he can have some fun as well as some nice conversations. He even enjoys their talk.. Because just like Mehwish, he also needed the attention… the kind of attention which he couldn’t get from his wife. He was not too eager for marriage but was not entirely avoiding marriage either.. that just shows that he liked her but did not love her.

He never had a proper relation with Danish. In fact he doesn’t care about him. Even when he got slapped by Danish.. he just let it go.. After all he had way too much in his mind.. he did not have time to breed unnecessary enmity between random people. He is a businessman and His time is money. He has his integrity. He is prideful. He enjoys the power, the authority, and he works hard to be in that position. He is a person who loves himself more than anyone else. He loves his position. He earned that position.

In way he is similar to Akanksha here, because he does not value love, be it familial love or romantic love. But the similarity ends there. He is not stupid like Akanksha. He is really intelligent, hard working. He is also power hungry.

Actually, he did not exactly crave for Mehwish. He flirted and she went along. But he never actually needed her. If she had not chosen him, then he would have just accepted it and went along. His Actual love was his work, his position, his authority. That is why, when his wife took that away from him, he was heartbroken… he was not that affected when both his wife and lover left him. His wife later forgave him but she did not allow him to continue in previous position. He was just so insulted by that condition that he decided to just leave. His work was his love and his identity.

Vaibhav: He is played by Manav Gohil(I am damn sure that, this name causes confusion during many scene rehearsals) Whenever I saw him in this serial, I thought I saw him many many times.. in other shows but only after wikiying him I realized that I have never seen even one of his earlier shows. But this proves that he has a real celebrity face. A face that makes you immediately think that he is some sort of celebrity. Manav gohil said that he wanted to do this role as he wanted to get out of his good boy image, which, as I see, is working perfectly well.

Just like I said, He is the second lead of the show. He actually have more fun interactions with his enemy ‘Manav Bajpayee’ than his ‘Kaamna’ By now both Manav and Vaibhav know each other so well… Each other’s strength and weakness. Maybe this happened because compared to Chandini Sharma, Both the male actors were in the industry more, and they may had more time to improvise and smoothen the characters. This is just my guess though.

Vaibhav is really different from Shehwar. While Shehwar was apathetic but charming businessman Vaibhav was a selfish and corrupt businessman. While Shehwar was a character written for Mehwish, Vaibhav seemed to a character written as anti-thesis for Manav. Be it be bitter taunts at each other or witty remarks, their conversations are always fun.

Compared to Shehwar, Vaibhav is more into the villain territory. His corrupt practices are shown more than his attraction towards Akanksha.

His attraction towards Akanksha is also not in much deeper level. With Shehwar and Mehwish at least the relation was not just physical attraction.. it did look like it was much more deep..(But not love though) With Vaibhav.. Everyone knows that Vaibhav is not actually in love.. Everyone means everyone.. Rane.. the servants.. his office staff.. Heck!! Even Akanksha knows that Vaibhav does not love her. And Vaibhav also knows that it is only his wealth that attracts her.

Interestingly, I feel that because Akanksha is so stupid and can be easily manipulated, that is the reason why Vaibhav wanted her. When you see him.. he is surrounded by many intelligent and successful women, like Maya.. Meera…etc.. but he only have romantic relationships with women who can be duped.. like that air hostess and some other model in the beginning. He is not looking for a meaningful relationship with anyone. He just wants few fun moments.. that’s it. If it was Mehwish.. he would have tried flirting .. but as soon as he realizes that Mehwish is not that stupid.. maybe he would have given up. With Akanksha though.. He is like, he got a toy or a puppet.. who can only move when he want.. He like that kind of control.

With Shehwar-Mehwar, it was a couple who liked each other but with Vaibhav-Akanksha, it is a Owner and toy relation. Akanksha is his entertainment. You can see that difference in the flirting strategy of both of them. Shehwar was mostly seducing her through his conversation. Yes, he did present her with a diamond necklace (Which looked like a fake to me… I blame the production house for it) But, still, his game plan mostly depended on his magic with words. Vaibhav, on the other hand, was mostly just flexing his money power in front of her. Gifting her new dress.. making her wear expensive clothes during the rehearsals.. Making her call him ‘Richie Rich’(UGH!!! THE CRINGE!!!) Calling her princess.. queen.. etc… His game plan was simple.. allure her with riches… Although, It may also be because Manav Gohil just does not have that kind of sexy voice like Adnan Siddiqui

It was implied that Shehwar had many romantic relationships.. but we do not see it.. in fact only Mehwish came close to him so much that they almost married. If it happened before, his wife would have already known.. So, I guess, it is safe to assume that only Mehwish reached there. But with Vaibhav we know that, he definitely had many many flings.. and many girls thought they would marry him… but he dumped them when the ‘M’ word even came in the conversation. He defiantly do not want to marry Akanksha, but he is not going to dump her yet.. he is just waiting for the moment when he is completely bored of her.

The difference in approach towards a relationship by both the men can be because of their respective situations. Shehwar was in an unhappy marriage, his wife was simply a stranger to him. He was looking for a companion to remove his loneliness of his life.. but not exactly love.. as I said, he loves himself more than anyone else.. Mehwish was just that companion.. Beautiful, smart and young. Vaibhav is not a victim of unhappy marriage. In fact, he seems to be just ok with his current state of life. He is rich, has freedom to do anything, go anywhere. No one is there to interfere with his daily matters. Vaibhav seems to be somewhat younger than Shehwar.. so, Shehwar, might have enjoyed the bachelor kind of lifestyle for some time… but then he reached a stage where he also craved for a companionship in his life. Vaibhav may not have reached that point in his life.. or maybe he just does not feel the need for it. After all, there are of course some people who do not feel the need for a companion in through out their life.

Now That I said comparing both these characters are like comparing Jokers of different batman movie.. there is still people who have their favorites.. So my favorite is Vaibhav.Even though I love Shehwar and his sexy voice. Vaibhav seems more like the second lead.. a villain … a much more involved character in the show. And I am sure many people also see it that way. Proof? You can see that during the whole enquiry arc.. when Vaibhav came back.. it was then we, all felt that the war has just begin.. otherwise Akanska was not even considered as Manav’s equal there. Manav could easily defeat Akanksha.. but when the promo showed the face of Vaibhav.. everyone were like.. now the fight has begun. How will Manav defeat Vaibhav.. everyone were guessing.Manav and Vaibhav has nice chemistry.. when they both are on screen together, you are enjoying the tension between them.

 Another reason to like Vaibav is simply because he is sometimes so funny. I am a simple woman.. I like actors with nice comedic timing

 Who is your favorite?

Originally posted by: Ms.S.K.

I’m speechless. In comparison of both shows -  You have analysed every character with each other so brilliantly  👏  

Waiting for Shehwar - Vaibhav, Roomi - Yathu etc

Would it be right to compare Salman - Khushalji? 

@bold My personal Opinion is that Salman's Indian version will be the Ansh, Manav and Akanksha's College friend. His wife Riya is also a common friend like Ayesha of the pakistani drama.. But lets see... What happens in the future.. Maybe it will be Khushalji after all