Episode #178: Duties, Dreams and Dramatics.

Posted: 2 years ago

Felt the need to make this post. Don't ask me why, I don't know. 

I slept for less than 3 hrs last night so forgive me for the short analysis. I decided to pick only the most important parts of the episode. 


Image

Men are often let off the hook for their actions or behavior and in patriarchal families like the Sabherwals, the blame lands on the women. 

Unmarried men - mothers 

Married men - wives


And this does not come in defense for Anokhi. I am also considering Devi a victim of this circle. 

Remember, how easily Devi was blamed for Shaurya's actions? Not just Tej, but even by Shaan in Anokhi's library humiliation track. Why was only Devi blamed when the whole Sabherwal clan has the same soch? 

Today, Shaurya Sabherwal is married and his wife is held responsible for his rebellion against their age old parampara. 

It does affect women deeply when something like this is hung over their head. There is no doubt that women are core of a family, however, it is wrong to hold her responsible for keeping the family together. That not ONLY her job. 


Image

Anokhi tried to explain this to Shaurya. She wanted him to understand that things get worse when he back-answers to support her. 

She wants to be accepted in her sasural. 

A newly wedded bride who is trying to adjust with a new family does not want to be treated like the 'other party' or in other words, the enemy.


Image

Shaurya not understanding her point wasn't a new thing. He merely wants to avoid drama. And could not clearly see her point, also he is annoyed with Badi Maa poking his insecurities to the surface. 

The fact is, men usually tend to ignore household matters. They think these things are trivial, mostly because women themselves are more into the matters inside the house while men assume that their role ends with earning for the family and outdoor chores. If men get even half as involved as women are in familial issues, they will see things the way women do. There is nothing called as "women are more sensitive than men". 

It will take a while for Shaurya to understand this and its sad that these issues won't be addressed adequately. 


Image

Shaurya took her words seriously and sat quiet ๐Ÿ˜‚

Anokhi and Shaurya both know that Anokhi is being targeted and are both trying to understand how to deal with these situations. 

Also, Shaurya is no fool. He saw how Devi made Rai ka Pahad just to accuse Anokhi. So even Anokhi needs to mind what is to be demanded of her husband. After all, most husbands do as told in matters concerning the family. 


Image

The fight was cute. And real as well. 

Dekho sau baat ki ek baat... Dating and Marriage equations are very different. The problems, the solving methods, and the level of understanding between each member of the family get involved. Also, once you start living with your spouse, you start noticing and learning more things about them. Living under the same roof does change the dating phase. 

However, I do not appreciate Shaurya taking his pillow and heading their fight outside their room. 


Image

Shaurya's annoyance is reasonable too. 

Shaurya is confused and upset too. 

He is unable to understand why things are changing between them after marriage and what exactly are Anokhi's expectations from him. It is natural. 

Let's be honest, Shaurya thought it would be easy to stand up for their relationship and support her dreams, not only because he worked on himself and changed... But because he did not include his family in his rapid calculations. Living with the family was their happy decision but he forgot that clash of ideologies was not just between Shaurya-Anokhi but also between Sabherwal clan and Anokhi. 


Image

When there are constant fights, accusations and taunts thrown at a person who can stand tall and call out the bullshit, there are gonna be after shocks. Here, the after shock is ShaKhi fights. Anokhi cannot and should not compromise while Shaurya should start to understand that his 'under the carpet' attitude does more harm than good. 

Anokhi is trying to fit in this new family while trying to keep her real self intact, it is obviously going to cause friction between Sabherwals and her, also in the husband-wife relationship. They are living under the same roof, sharing the same food, so clashes will happen. 


The fact is, had there been more time, makers would have taken it slower and given us everything we need but we know the unfortunate truth. 


Image

I genuinely respect the fact that they are trying to cover the MAJOR patriarchal issues they originally had planned to show post-marriage. Yes, we want romance and intimacy in this last leg of the show, but as a member of the audience who loves SAAKK for keep the tracks rooted to reality, I am completely in sync with everything. 

Married logo se pucho, newly married phase mei kitni ladaiya hoti hai..! It is because both are adjusting and getting to know each other. Romance dikhane mei makers ka kuch nahi jata, but pyaar sirf touch mei nahi feel mei bhi bayan kiya jata hai. And ShaKhi are expressing their feelings too well. 

Posted: 2 years ago

The execution speed and the new tracks have become too much even for us now who are used to greater-than-normal speed of SAAKK..


The issue raised is very pertinent. It is always the woman who is blamed for all actions of men, be it mother or wife.. Somewhere all the constant fights have left Anokhi defenseless and Shaurya powerless.. Both have clearly moved on from the honeymoon phase of the relationship and are in full husband-wife role now..

BM understands Shaurya and is using his insecurities and Anokhi's straightforwardness to cause friction between them.. It will be really interesting to see how all the tracks are solved with new ones being added daily in just 8 more episodes..

Posted: 2 years ago

Agree with everything you say except the fact that Shaurya should remember that Anokhi is new to the household and his family never wanted her as the daughter in law. Leaving the bedroom is the first mistake and refusing lunch is the second. Especially if he joins Shagun for lunch, then that is the ultimate insult to Anokhi.

Anokhi is trying to please too much. 

In fact the problem is the timeline. Everything being shown is reality but at rocket speed.

Posted: 2 years ago

Originally posted by AK_2010


Felt the need to make this post. Don't ask me why, I don't know. 

I slept for less than 3 hrs last night so forgive me for the short analysis. I decided to pick only the most important parts of the episode. 


Image

Men are often let off the hook for their actions or behavior and in patriarchal families like the Sabherwals, the blame lands on the women. 

Unmarried men - mothers 

Married men - wives


And this does not come in defense for Anokhi. I am also considering Devi a victim of this circle. 

Remember, how easily Devi was blamed for Shaurya's actions? Not just Tej, but even by Shaan in Anokhi's library humiliation track. Why was only Devi blamed when the whole Sabherwal clan has the same soch? 

Today, Shaurya Sabherwal is married and his wife is held responsible for his rebellion against their age old parampara. 

It does affect women deeply when something like this is hung over their head. There is no doubt that women are core of a family, however, it is wrong to hold her responsible for keeping the family together. That not ONLY her job. 


Image

Anokhi tried to explain this to Shaurya. She wanted him to understand that things get worse when he back-answers to support her. 

She wants to be accepted in her sasural. 

A newly wedded bride who is trying to adjust with a new family does not want to be treated like the 'other party' or in other words, the enemy.


Image

Shaurya not understanding her point wasn't a new thing. He merely wants to avoid drama. And could not clearly see her point, also he is annoyed with Badi Maa poking his insecurities to the surface. 

The fact is, men usually tend to ignore household matters. They think these things are trivial, mostly because women themselves are more into the matters inside the house while men assume that their role ends with earning for the family and outdoor chores. If men get even half as involved as women are in familial issues, they will see things the way women do. There is nothing called as "women are more sensitive than men". 

It will take a while for Shaurya to understand this and its sad that these issues won't be addressed adequately. 


Image

Shaurya took her words seriously and sat quiet ๐Ÿ˜‚

Anokhi and Shaurya both know that Anokhi is being targeted and are both trying to understand how to deal with these situations. 

Also, Shaurya is no fool. He saw how Devi made Rai ka Pahad just to accuse Anokhi. So even Anokhi needs to mind what is to be demanded of her husband. After all, most husbands do as told in matters concerning the family. 


Image

The fight was cute. And real as well. 

Dekho sau baat ki ek baat... Dating and Marriage equations are very different. The problems, the solving methods, and the level of understanding between each member of the family get involved. Also, once you start living with your spouse, you start noticing and learning more things about them. Living under the same roof does change the dating phase. 

However, I do not appreciate Shaurya taking his pillow and heading their fight outside their room. 


Image

Shaurya's annoyance is reasonable too. 

Shaurya is confused and upset too. 

He is unable to understand why things are changing between them after marriage and what exactly are Anokhi's expectations from him. It is natural. 

Let's be honest, Shaurya thought it would be easy to stand up for their relationship and support her dreams, not only because he worked on himself and changed... But because he did not include his family in his rapid calculations. Living with the family was their happy decision but he forgot that clash of ideologies was not just between Shaurya-Anokhi but also between Sabherwal clan and Anokhi. 


Image

When there are constant fights, accusations and taunts thrown at a person who can stand tall and call out the bullshit, there are gonna be after shocks. Here, the after shock is ShaKhi fights. Anokhi cannot and should not compromise while Shaurya should start to understand that his 'under the carpet' attitude does more harm than good. 

Anokhi is trying to fit in this new family while trying to keep her real self intact, it is obviously going to cause friction between Sabherwals and her, also in the husband-wife relationship. They are living under the same roof, sharing the same food, so clashes will happen. 


The fact is, had there been more time, makers would have taken it slower and given us everything we need but we know the unfortunate truth. 


Image

I genuinely respect the fact that they are trying to cover the MAJOR patriarchal issues they originally had planned to show post-marriage. Yes, we want romance and intimacy in this last leg of the show, but as a member of the audience who loves SAAKK for keep the tracks rooted to reality, I am completely in sync with everything. 

Married logo se pucho, newly married phase mei kitni ladaiya hoti hai..! It is because both are adjusting and getting to know each other. Romance dikhane mei makers ka kuch nahi jata, but pyaar sirf touch mei nahi feel mei bhi bayan kiya jata hai. And ShaKhi are expressing their feelings too well. 

True the fights seem so so real and their tries to resolve also seems to realistically treated.

After 5yrs of marriage.. I still get into such fights almost every 2-3 days and then similar manana...๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚.. both r confused how to handle and how to handle

Posted: 2 years ago
Originally posted by Jiggy7


The execution speed and the new tracks have become too much even for us now who are used to greater-than-normal speed of SAAKK..


The issue raised is very pertinent. It is always the woman who is blamed for all actions of men, be it mother or wife.. Somewhere all the constant fights have left Anokhi defenseless and Shaurya powerless.. Both have clearly moved on from the honeymoon phase of the relationship and are in full husband-wife role now..

BM understands Shaurya and is using his insecurities and Anokhi's straightforwardness to cause friction between them.. It will be really interesting to see how all the tracks are solved with new ones being added daily in just 8 more episodes..

Yes. It is too fast but a part of me is also glad its not too stretched. 

True! They have entered the husband-wife zone. More like pushed into that zone. 

I trust the makers to end it decently  Fingers crossed. 

Posted: 2 years ago
Originally posted by kiranpri


Agree with everything you say except the fact that Shaurya should remember that Anokhi is new to the household and his family never wanted her as the daughter in law. Leaving the bedroom is the first mistake and refusing lunch is the second. Especially if he joins Shagun for lunch, then that is the ultimate insult to Anokhi.

Anokhi is trying to please too much. 

In fact the problem is the timeline. Everything being shown is reality but at rocket speed.

Shaurya is an imposing character. He often uses my or highway formula and hence jab pyaar se baat na bane, toh zor se manva leta hai. He thinks he can do the same here and help Anokhi get settled into the family. 

I would wait to see what that Shagun lunch thing is all abt. Yes, Shaurya should not have left the room. 

Anokhi is not trying to please too much. She is trying to understand the dynamics and find some stability in that family bcz thats how families work. But the thing is the efforts are one sided. Sabherwals leave no chance to corner her and that is why it is getting so engaging. 

Edited by AK_2010 - 2 years ago
Posted: 2 years ago
Originally posted by AK_2010


Shaurya is an imposing character. He often uses my or highway formula and hence jab pyaar se baat na bane, toh zor se manva leta hai. He thinks he can do the same here and help Anokhi get settled into the family. 

I would wait to see what that Shagun lunch thing is all abt. Yes, Shaurya should not have left the room. 

Anokhi is not trying to please too much. She is trying to understand the dynamics and find some stability in that family bcz thats how families work. But the thing is the efforts are one sided. Sabherwals leave no chance to corner her and that is why it is getting so engaging. 

Anokhi knows the family does not like her as Shaurya bride but is trying to force the issue. Sometimes you need to take a back step, unfortunately Shaurya has always been pampered and he is expecting same from Anokhi.

Let us wait and see what that lunch with Shagun gives...

Posted: 2 years ago

๐Ÿ‘wow as usual superbly explained ๐Ÿ‘

Unfortunately due to time constraints it seems too many things are happening. But they are still trying to cover a lot and give a justified ending. 

Posted: 2 years ago

Great post Akshu! You brought up a very good point that women , be it as wives or mothers ,get blamed many a times for boys/menโ€™s fallacies. Shaurya is trying , so is Anokhi. One needs to be a little more emotionally available for his partner , the other needs to be a little more self aware of what she wants.
Shaurya always wanting to shrug the issue off and sweep it under the rug is something I can relate to in a way. I donโ€™t like confrontations, but I know I need to face it before things become worse.
As for Anokhi, sheโ€™s walking a thin line, conflicted about Shaurya and his family. Naturally her age also plays  in on how and when she reacts. 

I love how they show both of them taking turns in being patient / impatient, mature/immature with each other. ๐Ÿ˜„

In a way Iโ€™m glad they are (hopefully) getting done with the fights now as they need each other for the actual soch ki tak kar with the Sabhs in the later , more crucial episodes. The family dynamics especially Devlok plotting is getting a little tiresome. But I understand they are needed to take the story forward. I hope it all ties in together at the end. The MUs and small fights are so relatable and realistically done, I just wish the writers balance the episodes and donโ€™t drag it out.

 Otherwise they are doing a wonderful job of bringing up valid, very real issues.

I had a few other things to write about your wonderful post but I didnโ€™t save my draft and lost it ๐Ÿ˜! 


Posted: 2 years ago

I'm going rainbow on my reply!

Originally posted by AK_2010


Felt the need to make this post. Don't ask me why, I don't know. 

I slept for less than 3 hrs last night so forgive me for the short analysis. I decided to pick only the most important parts of the episode. 

Men are often let off the hook for their actions or behavior and in patriarchal families like the Sabherwals, the blame lands on the women. 

Unmarried men - mothers 

Married men - wives

And this does not come in defense for Anokhi. I am also considering Devi a victim of this circle. 

Remember, how easily Devi was blamed for Shaurya's actions? Not just Tej, but even by Shaan in Anokhi's library humiliation track. Why was only Devi blamed when the whole Sabherwal clan has the same soch? 

Today, Shaurya Sabherwal is married and his wife is held responsible for his rebellion against their age old parampara. 

This is a great point! The patriarchy continues because men hold women responsible for all the faults and the ills they experience. Instead of taking their set of the blame, it falls on the women. Just like Anokhi's "faults" are blamed on her mother, Shaurya's "behavior" is blamed on his mothers. When we have the nature vs nurture argument, the nurturer is always the mother. Even nature is addressed as Mother Nature. It's a joke that's thrown around that 'compliments go to the father and complaints to the mother'. I guess with marriage that transfers to the wife. 

It does affect women deeply when something like this is hung over their head. There is no doubt that women are core of a family, however, it is wrong to hold her responsible for keeping the family together. That not ONLY her job. 

Anokhi tried to explain this to Shaurya. She wanted him to understand that things get worse when he back-answers to support her. 

She wants to be accepted in her sasural. 

A newly wedded bride who is trying to adjust with a new family does not want to be treated like the 'other party' or in other words, the enemy.

Women should not be assumed the core of the family. That in itself is an issue. If a couple come together to create a family, then the responsibility should fall on both of them. Obviously depending on the structure and function of your family, there will be division of responsibility but it shouldn't have a gender bias. 

Anokhi's thought isn't wrong, but her method of explaining is wrong. She wants him to support her, but not vocally. That's not really feasible. She wants him to voice his support without going to war for her. That's not fair to expect from a loved one, to only half-ass their support. She also expects him to read her mind...again very unfair. It's okay to have expectations of your spouse, but expecting full obedience isn't right. 

Shaurya not understanding her point wasn't a new thing. He merely wants to avoid drama. And could not clearly see her point, also he is annoyed with Badi Maa poking his insecurities to the surface. 

The fact is, men usually tend to ignore household matters. They think these things are trivial, mostly because women themselves are more into the matters inside the house while men assume that their role ends with earning for the family and outdoor chores. If men get even half as involved as women are in familial issues, they will see things the way women do. There is nothing called as "women are more sensitive than men". 

It will take a while for Shaurya to understand this and its sad that these issues won't be addressed adequately. 

I can't even argue the family set up since that's the family Anokhi agreed to be married into and also the one she wanted to grihpravesh into. She wanted to be the ideal bahu. She chose to keep the family dynamics where men go out and work and don't get into "women's work". She wants all the responsibility of the bahu. All of this would be small potatoes in any newlywed couple's lives. ShaKhi's issues are really only complicated by the machinations of Devlok. And as a viewer, feeling that time crunch and the sadness of these issues not being appropriately addressed, is making us antsy. 

Shaurya took her words seriously and sat quiet ๐Ÿ˜‚

Anokhi and Shaurya both know that Anokhi is being targeted and are both trying to understand how to deal with these situations. 

Also, Shaurya is no fool. He saw how Devi made Rai ka Pahad just to accuse Anokhi. So even Anokhi needs to mind what is to be demanded of her husband. After all, most husbands do as told in matters concerning the family. 

I didn't mind that he sat quiet initially, but when she looked at him, that should've been the signal to jump in. Clearly ShaKhi have to work on communication. They need to find the signals that work for them. If Anokhi is standing up for herself, then sit back and enjoy the show. If Anokhi is staying quiet and looking at you, jump in and defend her. I feel bad for Shaurya having to learn how to be a husband! This is why he wanted a Shagun-like wife who just moved in and took care of stuff and left him alone. Who told him to fall for the opposite?๐Ÿ˜†

The fight was cute. And real as well. 

Dekho sau baat ki ek baat... Dating and Marriage equations are very different. The problems, the solving methods, and the level of understanding between each member of the family get involved. Also, once you start living with your spouse, you start noticing and learning more things about them. Living under the same roof does change the dating phase. 

However, I do not appreciate Shaurya taking his pillow and heading their fight outside their room. 

I'm glad he addressed their deal of not going to bed angry. Again not a real feasible thing to follow through. If couples are able to do that, then kudos to them. I'm someone who'll get pissed, yell at the hubby, go to sleep and then talk it out the next day. I agree with Shaurya, personal space is a thing you need!

Shaurya sleeping in the hall is stupid...go find another bedroom in your alishaan house! If we had more time for more scenes, Anokhi would've totally found him and fixed things at night. For the sake of drama, they can't get on the same page too soon. 

Shaurya's annoyance is reasonable too. 

Shaurya is confused and upset too. 

He is unable to understand why things are changing between them after marriage and what exactly are Anokhi's expectations from him. It is natural. 

Let's be honest, Shaurya thought it would be easy to stand up for their relationship and support her dreams, not only because he worked on himself and changed... But because he did not include his family in his rapid calculations. Living with the family was their happy decision but he forgot that clash of ideologies was not just between Shaurya-Anokhi but also between Sabherwal clan and Anokhi. 

Shaurya had on rose colored glasses. He thought love was the solution to everything. Too bad his Badi Ma doesn't love him like he assumed and she's not worthy of his love. Shaurya's change for Anokhi occurred in their own love bubble. When that new Shaurya met the real world and real people, he couldn't withstand the pressure. I hope Shaurya can meld the two Shaurya's together or else he will really feel like he's missing in his own love story. 

When there are constant fights, accusations and taunts thrown at a person who can stand tall and call out the bullshit, there are gonna be after shocks. Here, the after shock is ShaKhi fights. Anokhi cannot and should not compromise while Shaurya should start to understand that his 'under the carpet' attitude does more harm than good. 

Anokhi is trying to fit in this new family while trying to keep her real self intact, it is obviously going to cause friction between Sabherwals and her, also in the husband-wife relationship. They are living under the same roof, sharing the same food, so clashes will happen. 

The fact is, had there been more time, makers would have taken it slower and given us everything we need but we know the unfortunate truth. 

All of this would be palatable with more time and classic SAAKK storytelling. I'll always have a regret of all the things that COVID took away, one of them is the story we deserved. 

I genuinely respect the fact that they are trying to cover the MAJOR patriarchal issues they originally had planned to show post-marriage. Yes, we want romance and intimacy in this last leg of the show, but as a member of the audience who loves SAAKK for keep the tracks rooted to reality, I am completely in sync with everything. 

I am soooo impressed by the way they're telling the story and the issues they care to take up. Even in a tie crunch, they've made a choice to stand by the story they wanted to tell. I'm glad to have experienced this show in real time, with this fandom, and with these great discussions. 

Married logo se pucho, newly married phase mei kitni ladaiya hoti hai..! It is because both are adjusting and getting to know each other. Romance dikhane mei makers ka kuch nahi jata, but pyaar sirf touch mei nahi feel mei bhi bayan kiya jata hai. And ShaKhi are expressing their feelings too well. 

As one of those married people, I can vouch for the stupid fights newlyweds get into. Especially when you're living and adjusting to a new person in your space constantly. Taking a new person into account when you make decisions. Caring about the wants and needs of another person can be exhausting and can cause frustration. 

I hope they tie up all the loose ends this week(2 episodes) and early next week(3 episodes), so that the last 3 episodes can be the healing process and the cute scenes we all deserve. 


Akshu thanks for this post!!



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