Mess - A Samrat-Pakhi SS [Part 6 - Page 12]

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Posted: 17 days ago

Hello everyone! 


Whats this? A Pakhi centred story? I must be out of my mind. Though I know how hated (and frankly annoying) Pakhi is, I also didn't hate her in the beginning. She was just a normal person in an unfortunate situation. She has clear flaws but to me, that makes her even more interesting. 


So yes, this will be Pakhi-centered. This will be her and Samrat's love story. Hopefully I will be able to rally some of you along for the journey. 



Part 1


Pakhi was a miserable mite. 


Her life was a mess and she was beginning to suspect that she had no one to blame but herself. 


She, Pakhi Patil, was the only child in a loving home. Of course she was spoiled. Her parents doted on her. She was used to getting whatever she wanted. Until recently she believed that she was kind and humble and reflected the values her parents instilled in her. 


However, here she sat, Patralekha Salunkhe, the eldest Chavan Bahu. She was mouthy, rude, opinionated, and simply tolerated, rather than loved.  


She despised this feeling. It was hard for her to identify what the feeling was exactly, but whatever it was, it was loathsome. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream, rip her hair out, tear the curtains down, throw up, curl up into a ball. She wanted to cry. For the first time she understood that she was alone. Entirely and utterly alone


She sat on the floor, her back against the bed, arms curled around her knees. She found herself in this position often. It was comforting. She needed comfort and she felt that no one in this house gave her any. Sure, they gave her praise and affection, but comfort was nowhere to be found. Not today, not after her latest introspections. 


--


This all started when Badi Mami came down with a bout of flu. She was confined to her room by the family doctor to rest and recover. 


Until this time she thought she understood how the Chavan household worked. Badi Mami, or Kaku, as everyone else called her, was the unchallenged matriarch of the household. Everyone looked up to her, respected her, abided by her wishes, and hung onto her every word. 


Ninad Mama and Omi Mama admired her greatly. Ashvini Mami and Ninad Mama clearly had a distant relationship and did not get along. It appeared that Ashvini Mami didn’t get along with any of her sisters-in-law, appearing outspoken and impudent. Sonali Mami admired Badi Mami and always tried to please her. Aai, or Mansi bua as she was lovingly referred to, held Badi Mami in high regard and stayed away from the governance of the household. Karishma was an unwelcome, but tolerated member of the household. Her and Mohit’s relationship was a love match, but was visibly strained. Sai was the outcast, the one who created barriers in relationships. She, Pakhi, was beloved by all except Sai and Ashvini Mami and seen as the perfect Bahu to lead the next generation. 


However, without the presence of Badi Mami, Pakhi saw a different side to the Chavan household. The family members were smiling, laughing, and cracking jokes. The environment was so relaxed it felt like she was at her own parents’ house. 


She observed as Ashvini Mami and Sonali Mami giggled like school girls in the kitchen, happily making the morning meal together. She stood off to the side, bewildered at their camaraderie. Where were the snubs? Where was the blatant show of power between them? When they were joined by Karishma, she faced no contempt from Sonali Mami. Rather, they appeared to be a loving mother-daughter duo. Even Sai was welcome amongst them with nary a word from Sonali Mami. 


When Pakhi had made a comment to correct Sai’s language, she was met by disgusted looks from Sonali Mami and Karishma and a swift reprimand from Ashvini Mami, rendering her speechless. 


The day continued in such fashion. At the dinning table various couples sat together and she observed a healthy dose of flirting amongst spouses. Even the ever serious Ninad Mama smiled happily with his wife, and helpfully gave Sai some fatherly advice regarding her education.


Pakhi observed her new family and felt like she had entered the twilight zone. Who were these people? Why had she never seen them act like this before? Why were they so different when Badi Mami was present?


--


Badi Mami’s flu lasted some days, and as these days went by, this happy and carefree air within Chavan Nivas continued. She observed that this lightened atmosphere and lack of daily conflict had caused Sai and Virat to come closer too. At times there was a secret smile shared between them, as though sharing an inside joke, and at other times, simply seeking our each other’s eyes in the crowd. It spoke of a quiet intimacy that made her blood boil. 


In these days Pakhi would act - in her opinion - how she had always acted in the home, however it was made abundantly clear to her that her attitude was unappreciated and unwelcome. Even Aai, at one point stated, “Patralekha beta, that tone was not necessary.”


All of this made Pakhi question her role within the family. She always perceived herself as the good Bahu, the beloved Bahu. She had Badi Mami’s approval. The Matriarch’s approval. That was everything. But she was starting to understand that that was all she had. She was not loved or favoured. She had approval and affection by association only. 


It appeared that the good Bahus were Sai and Karishma. She had thought Karishma to be weak and petty, only interested in engaging in kitchen politics. How could she think any differently? Her first experience of Karishma was of the girl snooping and listening at her door. Instead, it seemed that Karishma, once the only Bahu of the younger generation, was kind and lively. She found joy in little things and made effort to know small details about family members, who were always delighted that someone remembered their likes and quirks. 


Then there was Sai. What could she say about Sai? She loathed her. Sai was married to her love, her Virat. Sai was mouthy and rude, especially to Pakhi. Sai was the reason that Virat was slowly breaking his vow to her. It was all Sai’s fault that Virat’s attention was straying from her. However, Sai was not the villain she, or even Badi Mami, had made to be. She saw a soft and sweet side to her that kept reminding her that Sai was just a teenager, just an 18 year old girl who had experienced great loss. Pakhi had, duty bound, taken meals for Badi Mami, and made sure to check on Badi Mami often. However Sai, behind the scenes, took full charge of her care. She made check-in calls to the doctor daily, tracked her medication and symptoms, and made meal recommendations to help better Badi Mami’s health. She did all this without Badi Mami knowing, pushing Ashvini Mami as her informant so she would not aggravate Badi Mami. She did this for someone who showed open contempt towards her. 


--


As time passed, Badi Mami’s health improved, until one fine morning she descended the stairs and joined her brothers in law for tea. Pakhi immediately felt the tense air returned. She had not noticed before, however having experienced openness, this tense atmosphere was stifling. 


For the last few days she had been mostly silent, simply observing rather than participating. She decided to continue this and see for herself the difference in everyone’s behaviour. 


Sai entered the living room in a flurry, just as Pakhi was serving tea. She made a comment about having to leave early for university and running late. No one else seemed to mind and Ashvini Mami rose to give Sai some breakfast. Badi Mami made a face and a comment about Sai. Sai, never one to back down, made a comment back. Pakhi observed the smirk of Bad Mami as she glanced at Ninad Mama, and sure enough, he made a statement to correct Sai. Pakhi noticed that Badi Mami glanced subtly at her. This was usually the time that she would try and put Sai in her place, however she just wasn’t feeling it today so she continued to sip at her tea. The conversation fizzled out and Sai moved to the table. Pakhi met Badi Mami’s glare head on. 


Things continued in this fashion. Pakhi chose to remain silent when conflict arose between Badi Mami and other household members, especially Sai. She simply observed. And what she saw she did not like. She noticed that Badi Mami would make instigatory statements towards the members of the house she disapproved of. This included Ashvini Mami, Karishma, and Sai. This would divide the house as some would try and defend, while others would agree with her. The term divide and conquer floated in her mind. Everyone wanted to be in her favour because she appeared powerful. However, what they didn’t realize was that they were essentially humouring a small minded old woman. They gave her the power that made her powerful. 


Another, more jarring, observation Pakhi made was that she was being groomed to be the next Badi Mami, the next Kaku of the household. Her statements and attitude were far more accepted by Badi Mami than the other bahus. When a statement was made Badi Mami, she would look to Pakhi for a reaction. Had she become that predictable? Badi Mami enjoyed watching her put Sai and Karishma in their places. She drew clear parallels between the 3 women of the older and the younger generation. She, Pakhi, was meant to be the ring leader, the oppressor. While Karishma would be the suck-up, and Sai the outcast.


Well, no more!


Pakhi sensed Badi Mami’s frustration when she kept mum and refused to insert herself into family conflicts. She had made the decision to keep to herself and keep her advice to herself, and she did so. She sensed that Badi Mami was displeased with her and she frequently met her narrowed gaze impassively, almost innocently. Pakhi was not one to back down from a confrontation, and she waited for the day that Badi Mami might raise question at her changed behaviour. She refused to fall in line and keep perpetuating this unpleasant atmosphere. 


--


With family conflict reducing, Pakhi noticed a lightening in the home atmosphere. She also noticed the tides turning quickly against her. Karishma, who she suspected her aligned with her simply because she was Badi Mami’s favourite, was seen bonding more often than not with Sai. Soon, they became inseparable. To be fair, they were likely similar in age and had a lot in common. 


Seeing a happy Sai seemed to bring about a happy Virat. Pakhi didn’t know how to feel about this. Should she be happy that Virat, her love, was happy? Or should she be envious that it was Sai who brought the carefree smile that had once enchanted Pakhi, back to his face?


Pakhi then tried to find her place in the house. It certainly was NOT with Sai and Karishma. She would never stoop so low. She was not going to communicate more than necessary with Badi Mami. She was clearly disliked by Ashvini and Sonali Mami. 


She turned to Aai, her mother-in-law for friendship but initially found this to be a difficult task as well. At first, Aai seemed uninterested and disapproving of her. Part of Pakhi worried that Samrat had shared with his Mother whatever he knew of her and Virat, but another part suspected that Aai was just unamused by her past behaviour within the home. When she did spend pleasant time with Aai, this time was spent talking about Samrat. 


This created more distress for Pakhi, for instead of focusing on Virat, her thoughts were now consumed by Samrat, her husband


At the time of the wedding, her thoughts were focused solely on Virat. Initially she had focused on her disappointment at Virat not contacting her, then her hurt at Virat not saving her number, then her pain at discovering she was marrying his brother, and then her final heartbreak at Virat’s request to marry his brother. It was Virat, Virat, Virat. Every thought was about Virat. 


In all of this, and all the subsequent events such as Virat marrying Sai, she had forgotten Samrat. Pakhi had forgotten that she was married to an actual living and breathing person. A person who has his own relationships, his own wants and desires, his own life. 


She, Pakhi, was Patralekha Salunkhe, wife of Samrat Salunkhe. Whether she liked it or not, she was tied to Samrat. She was supposed to share her life with Samrat. Samrat had conveniently been called back to action before he and her could establish any kind of relationship or routine, and since then he was MIA - missing in action - leading to her putting him entirely out of her mind. 


Putting Samrat out of her mind seemed an impossible task now. How could she? In spending all this time with Aai, seemed to also spend time with Samrat. Aai spoke of his difficult childhood, of them moving frequently to different army bases and his loneliness as a child. She spoke of his pain at losing his father and moving a final time to Chavan Nivas. She also spoke of her pain and fear of him joining the army and of her daily pleas  for the fates to somehow return her son, her lifeline to her. Pakhi was not heartless. She might not have given Samrat any thought, but this kind woman, her mother-in-law, often brought tears to her eyes with her sadness. Eventually, Aai seemed to see Pakhi as her kin. They were both army wives and the loss of a husband was their shared experience. She wished she could do something, anything to ease Aai’s pain.


Pakhi knew there was nothing she could do, so she would sit and listen. She would laugh at stories about Samrat, coo at baby pictures of Samrat, get mad at his childish shenanigans, and cry at his loss. Having a partner to process these emotions seemed to have greatly helped Aai.


However, the more she thought about Samrat, the less she thought about Virat. But Virat was always there, always hovering in her brain. 


Pakhi was starting to understand Virat’s dilemma. His mentor’s dying wish was that his daughter be cared for, and Virat was simply a man of his word. It was one of the more appealing things about him; his resolve. Though this resolve seemed to be taking him away from her more and more. 


Pakhi was also beginning to understand something; there was no happy ending in store for her. In no world would the conservative Chavan clan accept a relationship between Pakhi and Virat. Even if Varat meant what he claimed; that his and Sai’s marriage was only a convent arrangement which would eventually end. If it did end, no one would look to pair Virat with her. Pakhi would always be seen as Samrat’s wife. If it turned out that Samrat ….. did not survive his mission, she would be expected to remain his widow. If he did return and they did not wish to be together, they would divorce and she would be returned, disgraced, to her parent’s home. And if Samrat remained MIA, she would be expected to wait for him for eternity. No one would accept any kind of relationship between Pakhi and Virat. 


Virat had doomed her. Or rather, she had doomed herself. She could have said no to his ask. She could have backed away. She said yes to Virat’s condition simply to be closer to him. Friendship was better than nothing, she had rationalized.


She was an impulsive fool. In anger she had blocked Virat’s number. And similarly, in high emotion, she agreed to marry Samrat. She sealed her own fate. There was no getting out of this. No escape from this situation. And there was no one to blame but herself. 


Yes, Pakhi was a miserable mite. She felt tears slide down her cheeks and hugged herself harder. There was no happiness in store for her.




I'd love to hear your thoughts


-Ally



INDEX:

Part 1 - Page 01

Part 2 - Page 03

Part 3 - Page 05

Part 4 - Page 08

Part 5 - Page 10

Part 6 - Page 12

Edited by Allyson - a day ago
Posted: 17 days ago

Awesome . You have expressed Pakhi’s dilemma so well .iIt was interesting to see Pakhi change .  It was not an overnight change but a gradual one . I can’t wait to see what happens if Samrat is back 

Posted: 17 days ago

Hey,it felt really nice, I'll be honest, that I am a full force Sairat bird and I get too much irritated with didi,but I do want you to continue this mess.

Would like to read through it. Would love to see if she will atleast try to redeem herself as a human being here.

Hope you will continue it soon💕

Posted: 17 days ago

What a beautiful write up towards gradual redemption. 


I would love to read more of it. She is also an independent women with her own thoughts who kind of got lost. I think she stopped herself before spiraling down any further.


Hope Samrat was really MiA/ In a secret mission and didn't run away.

Posted: 17 days ago

Lovely!!!!


The observation of the house were quite on point!!!


Pakhi understanding all that was a welcome change.... If the show displays even half of it, it will be great!!!!


Waiting for samrat to return!!!


Continue soon!!


Happy writing!!!

Posted: 17 days ago

Originally posted by sukri


What a beautiful write up towards gradual redemption. 


I would love to read more of it. She is also an independent women with her own thoughts who kind of got lost. I think she stopped herself before spiraling down any further.


Hope Samrat was really MiA/ In a secret mission and didn't run away.

💯 I agree ..I would want to see a redemption graph for pp too 

Every one deserves a chance at happiness

Posted: 16 days ago

Originally posted by 404_NotFound


Awesome . You have expressed Pakhi’s dilemma so well .iIt was interesting to see Pakhi change .  It was not an overnight change but a gradual one . I can’t wait to see what happens if Samrat is back 


Thank you! 


One thing I dislike about Indian shows is how characters change overnight. She didn't become like this overnight, nor will we see overnight change in her. Thanks for giving this a read and sticking by. 

Posted: 16 days ago

Originally posted by Shristhi2002


Hey,it felt really nice, I'll be honest, that I am a full force Sairat bird and I get too much irritated with didi,but I do want you to continue this mess.

Would like to read through it. Would love to see if she will atleast try to redeem herself as a human being here.

Hope you will continue it soon💕


I love SaiRat as well and obviously ship them, but I feel like there's plenty of stories about them. poor Samrat needs some live as well. 


Thanks for giving this a read!


Ghum Hai Kisikey Pyaar Meiin 


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