Does Amber need professional help?

silvermoonlight thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

I feel like Amber hasn’t gone through the grieving process in its entirety 


He has anxiety issues and some depression it seems 

Yes online dating is scary for someone of Ambers age and because he is so socially isolated 


I feel like he should talk to someone about his loss and feelings 


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coolniki thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

I agree. He is still stuck in the past. I am surprised that Niya hasn't noticed it or she think the way he behaves is fine.

Bana thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Yes I hv been harping in that in my posts here. It is not normal to keep pillows & a photo like someone is sleeping there every night on ur bed - thats psycho. It is ok to be a grouch but not to dislike & find fault with each & every soul around u for no solid reason. Ambar’s character has obvious psychological issues - how cld an educated daughter & a doctor friend miss the signs?

Also he is a 50 yr old man not a sadhu sant. It cannot be that he has no physical urges, as a widower he has just suppressed them coz of our conditioning & values. I dont get his absurd aversion to even a casual touch fm a woman.

I wonder if the show writers even realise that in their attempt to create an “athrangi” character many of the behavioural traits they hv written for Ambar border on latent depression & mental illness.

Edited by Bana - 4 years ago
Sakurablossom thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

I watched few episodes and I thought of the same thing. 

He has signs of depression. 

silvermoonlight thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

He is not ‘psycho’ ...that’s a very damaging term to use for those suffering from mental health issues

he has signs of depression and anxiety which is probably why he doesn’t like to be touched 

Also I don’t think the woman had any right to keep touching him if he already expressed discomfort 


If the roles were reversed and it was Amber doing that then every would scream harassment ...regardless of gender unwanted touching is harassment 


Amber had to become a father and mother to Nia all of a sudden and in trying to take care of his daughter he forgot about himself ..his needs and desires as a man ...his only identity is being Nias father 


I’m hoping Guneet becomes that partner he shares his feelings with because it’s not easy for a man to show sorrow loss and grief openly


His character kind of reminds me of Hanuman Singh from Patiala Babes who also had a lot of bottled emotions from the death of his wife and in one episode he lets it all out ...too bad the character and show got so badly butchered ☹️


Edited by silvermoonlight - 4 years ago
Sakurablossom thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: silvermoonlight

He is not ‘psycho’ ...that’s a very damaging term to use for those suffering from mental health issues

he has signs of depression and anxiety which is probably why he doesn’t like to be touched 

Also I don’t think the woman had any right to keep touching him if he already expressed discomfort 


If the roles were reversed and it was Amber doing that then every would scream harassment ...regardless of gender unwanted touching is harassment 


Amber had to become a father and mother to Nia all of a sudden and in trying to take care of his daughter he forgot about himself ..his needs and desires as a man ...his only identity is being Nias father 


I’m hoping Guneet becomes that partner he shares his feelings with because it’s not easy for a man to show sorrow loss and grief openly


His character kind of reminds me of Hanuman Singh from Patiala Babes who also had a lot of bottled emotions from the death of his wife and in one episode he lets it all out ...too bad the character and show got so badly butchered ☹️


True. 

Word psycho is used very casually by most people.

Also that woman should have stopped when he showed discomfort. His date was disaster at so many levels, I'm happy it ended.

Hanuman Singh was different in a way that despite his sorrow he was really warm and polite towards everyone unless someone really crossed a boundary. 

Bana thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

I am not using the term psycho for his depression. I recognise that as a mental illness that I wld nvr belittle. Depression is one of the problems of this character. It is a normal problem. 

Pretending as if someone dead is alive to the extent of recreating their sleeping figure on the bed is completely abnormal bordering on psychosis. It is one thing to keep the departed’s photo near ur bed or her keep her usual chair at the dining table unoccupied, in her memory or as a homage. But putting 2 pillows covered w a sheet like a body & photo for face is creepy. The writers are treating both things the same but they are not. They shd hv done better research before showing something so extreme & creepy just to establish he is missing his wife.

Bana thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: silvermoonlight

He is not ‘psycho’ ...that’s a very damaging term to use for those suffering from mental health issues

he has signs of depression and anxiety which is probably why he doesn’t like to be touched 

Also I don’t think the woman had any right to keep touching him if he already expressed discomfort 


If the roles were reversed and it was Amber doing that then every would scream harassment ...regardless of gender unwanted touching is harassment 


Amber had to become a father and mother to Nia all of a sudden and in trying to take care of his daughter he forgot about himself ..his needs and desires as a man ...his only identity is being Nias father 


I’m hoping Guneet becomes that partner he shares his feelings with because it’s not easy for a man to show sorrow loss and grief openly


His character kind of reminds me of Hanuman Singh from Patiala Babes who also had a lot of bottled emotions from the death of his wife and in one episode he lets it all out ...too bad the character and show got so badly butchered ☹️


I dont know whether we are shown a different edit version in my country - I watched the scene again (where he jumps up & says washroom) & that was the first time the lady touched him. Understand his discomfort but to behave like she was about to molest him!!

Again I feel the writers are going overboard in trying to “show” us Ambar’s character, rubbing it in with every scene & every pore of his body screaming out ‘look I am khadoos’, not trusting the viewers to get it from the signs. 


Edited by Bana - 4 years ago
Nature-Happiness thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

He clearly shows symptoms of trauma. He has been totally traumatized. I don't think this has got to to do anything with depression. Depression is something that makes you feel hollow, and thoughts of suiciding. He doesn't have any hollowness or that feeling of killing himself. All this has something to do with his past. And that lady was nonsense. What does she think of herself? 


And, Hanuman Singh was not at all like him

 He was extremely cordial with people, and extremely shy and cute. He had fondness towards certain people. And was very warm. Unlike, Amber. Amber is traumatized because of something, and that's what made him this.

Edited by Nature-Happiness - 4 years ago
silvermoonlight thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Nature-Happiness

He clearly shows symptoms of trauma. He has been totally traumatized. I don't think this has got to to do anything with depression. Depression is something that makes you feel hollow, and thoughts of suiciding. He doesn't have any hollowness or that feeling of killing himself. All this has something to do with his past. And that lady was nonsense. What does she think of herself? 


And, Hanuman Singh was not at all like him

 He was extremely cordial with people, and extremely shy and cute. He had fondness towards certain people. And was very warm. Unlike, Amber. Amber is traumatized because of something, and that's what made him this.


Depression has many ways of expressing itself ..it’s a common misconception that people who are depressed are suicidal ..it’s a spectrum disorder than can be mild to severe ...and yes he is traumatized so perhaps he might have some kind of ptsd ...he went through a lot when his wife died especially her family members and he had no one to share his anger, grief and sorrow with 


Also I didn’t say Amber and HS are alike ...but they both experienced the loss of a spouse and both bottled their emotions 

Amber made his daughter and business his life 

HS drank to numb his pain ..yes he was cordial and warm and wise but he too warned about his darker side ...the animal in him..that animal was his bottled up pain 


both men never dealt with the loss or their spouse and it took a toll on them