Nazar

FF: Manthan: Vish ya Amrit (completed)

Nikita_99503 thumbnail
Visit Streak 180 0 Thumbnail Easter Egg Contest Winner (2023) 0 Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 4 years ago

Okay, having nothing else to do, I just thought of writing something. Do tell me if you guys liked it or not, especially if you didn't like it....

PS. Sorry in advance if you don't like it...


Table of contents:

Part 1: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/151753363

Part 2: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/151819541

Part 3: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/151879875

Part 4: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152013708

Part 5: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152084607

Part 6: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152174007

Part 7: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152219502

Part: 1

A shock for the Rathods

        It was a special day for Rishi... After all, it was his birthday! Everyone was busy preparing for Rishi's birthday party without any inkling of the future... Everyone was happy and excited.

        Vedashree was busy preparing for the morning pooja. Suddenly, a cold chill ran down her spine... She began to feel as if something really bad has happened or is going to happen. She had just folded her hands in prayer when Chaitali came there asking Vedashree if they should go and wake up Pia and Ansh. Vedashree agreed and they both prepared the breakfast tray and ascended the stairs to Piansh's room...

        They opened the door and entered. A shocking sight greeted them... Pia was lying unconscious on the bed with her body slowly turning blue. And Ansh... Where was he???

CRASH!!! 

        Vedashree dropped the breakfast tray and they both rushed towards Pia.... 


Ved: Pia!!! Ye kya ho gaya ise? Chaitali jaldi jakar sabko bulao... (looking around worried) Aur... aur... aur ye Ansh kahan hai?? (calling out in a loud voice) ANSH... ANSH... Kahan gaya ye?


        Everyone gathered in the room around the bed. They all were worried...


Avi: Rishi, jaldi jakar ambulance ko call karo. 

Rishi: Ji papa.

Ved: Mujhe nahi lagta ki ye koi mamuli baat hai... Hume turant Nishant ji ko bulana chahiye.


        They called Nishant but his phone was out of reach... After trying for several times, they were finally able to contact him.

        Meanwhile, the entire house was shrouded in gloom... Only the sounds of Vedashree's sobs were audible in the room. The decorations for the birthday party were lying on the floor, completely forgotten... 

        Nishant and Saavi arrived there. One look at Pia was enough to tell him what had happened to her.


Ni: Pia par kisi zeher ka asar hua hai.

Chai: To phir hum Pia ko hospital lekar jaate hain. Yahan kyu ruke hue hain?

Ved: Nahi Chaitali, mujhe nahi lagta ki ye koi mamuli zeher hai...

Ni: Sahi kaha aapne Vedashree ji... Ye zarur koi bahut khaas aur khatarnak zeher hai.

Ved: To phir ye zeher hai kaun sa?

Ni: Abhi main kuch nahi keh sakta. Mujhe thoda waqt chahiye pata lagane ke liye... Sabse pehle hume ye pata lagana hoga ki ye zeher Pia ke shareeer main gaya kaise... (looking around him) Ye Ansh kahan hai? Use zarur pata hoga ki aakhir Pia ke saath kya hua hai...

Ved: Pata nahi... Subah se gayab hai. Hum sab abhi use hi dhoondhne ja rahe the...


        And all of them went looking around for Ansh. Ultimately they found him in the balcony relaxed, playing video game on his mobile phone...


Ved: Ansh, tu yahan kya kar raha hai?

Ansh: Maa... Lagta hai aap par umar ka asar dikhne lag gaya hai. Aapki aankhe kharab ho gayi hain kya? Dikh nahi raha video game khel raha hoon...

Ved: Tu yahan aaram se video game khel raha hai aur wahan dekh Pia ko kya ho gaya hai...

Ansh: To main kya karu? Main koi doctor to nahi hoon... Aur please ab mujhe disturb mat kijiye...

Ved (crying) Ye tu kya bol raha hai Ansh? Kya ho gaya hai tujhe?


        By this time, Nishant had come there and he had seen what the others didn't... There was a black half-moon on the back of Ansh's neck. It didn't take him much time to realise that Ansh had turned into a Davansh completely.


Ni: Rehne dijiye Vedashree ji. Is se baat karne ka koi fayda nahi hai. Gudiya jeeye ya mare, ise koi fark nahi padne wala...

Ved: Ye aap kya keh rahe hain Nishant ji? Ansh Pia se pyaar karta hai... Ise kaise fark nahi padega? (turning towards Ansh) Tu kuch bol kyu nahi raha hai?

Ansh: Aap itna ro kyu rahi hain?

Ni: Main theek keh raha hoon Vedashree ji... Ansh poori tarah se Davansh ban chuka hai. Is par aapki kisi baat ka koi asar nahi hone wala.

Ved: Nahi... aisa nahi ho sakta... Mera Ansh Davansh nahi ban sakta..


        Ansh came forward and waved a hand a few inches above Vedashree's head as if trying to feel something.


Chai ( looking scared and confused): Ye tu kya kar raha hai Ansh?

Ansh: Janne ki koshish kar raha hoon ki inke sar par aisi kaun si aansuon ki tanki hai jo khaali hi nahi hoti...

Ved: Ansh... Tu pagal ho gaya hai kya?

Ni (interrupting them): Achha ye batao Pia ke saath kya hua?

Ansh: Pata nahi. Achanak se behosh ho gayi aur neeli padne lag gayi. Mujhe laga ki marr gayi... Anyways, ab aap aa hi gaye hain. So, can you please remove her from my bed and my room?


Nishant left from there in anger.

        Back in the room, Saavi was frantically trying to stop the poison from spreading in Pia's body but in vain. Pia's body had turned completely blue.

She saw Nishant and rushed to him. 


Sa: Dad kuch pata chal Di ke saath kya hua? Unki body main zeher kaise gaya?

Ni: Nahi...

Sa: To ab hum pata kaise lagayenge ki Di ki body main kaun sa zeher gaya hai?

Ni: Gudiya ke baalo ke zariye...

Sa: Baalo ke zariye?

Ni: Haan...


        He went and plucked a strand of hair from Pia's head. Then he took out a copper bowl and poured Ganga-jal in it. To it, he added Jabakusum flowers, Tulsi leaves, Sarpika poison (which Divya had given him) and sandalwood.

        Both Nishant and Saavi folded their hands and closed their eyes. Nishant was chanting the Vish Bodh Mantra which he had read in the Sarp Shastra. They opened their eyes.


Sa: Dad isse kya hoga?

Ni: Isse hume ye us zeher ke baare main pata chal jayega.

Sa: Main kuch samjhi nahi dad...

Ni: Is duniya main sirf teen zeher aise hain jo Sarpika par asar kar sakte hain. Pehla hai Neelkesh Naag ka zeher; dusra hai Patal Lok main milne wala Harit Vish aur teesra hai Jamuni Vish jo ki Daayan Vriksh ke jado se banaya jaata hai.

Sa: Okay... So, is liquid se hume kya pata chalega?

Ni: Us zeher ka rang... Neelkesh Naag ka zeher gehre neele rang ka hota hai. Harit Vish hare rang ka aur Jamuni Vish...

Sa:  Jamuni rang ka?

Ni: Correct... Ab is mixture ko dekho. Ye abhi sunehre rang ka hai. Jab main isme ye baal dalunga, to ye usi rang ka ho jayega jo zeher Gudiya ko diya gaya hai..

Sa: To ab isme Di ka baal daale?

Ni: Haan...

        He added Pia's hair to the mixture. They waited for a few moments... The liquid in the bowl took a deep violet hue.

Sa:  Dad, ye to Jamuni rang ka ho gaya...

Ni:  Iska matlab Gudiya ko Jamuni Vish diya gaya hai... Ho na ho, is sab main Mohona ka hi haath hai. Uske alawa ye zeher koi aur bana hi nahi sakta...

"DAAADDD!!!"


        Saavi who was looking at Pia suddenly gave a loud cry and pointed towards the bed. Nishant turned and saw what she had seen. Both were shocked...

Edited by Nikki_srk - 3 years ago


DO NOT COPY THIS POST AS THIS IS EXCLUSIVE TO INDIA FORUMS


Created

Last reply

Replies

114

Views

6461

Users

5

Likes

77

Frequent Posters

Nush_Rat thumbnail
Visit Streak 750 0 Thumbnail Visit Streak 500 0 Thumbnail + 7
Posted: 4 years ago

Amazing one dear! Keep it up! πŸ‘πŸΌ

Waise, itne sare atrangi naam kaha se leke aye? πŸ˜†

Special thanks for Ansh's dialogue. Can't wait for the next part. 

Madhura.. thumbnail
Anniversary 14 Thumbnail Group Promotion 7 Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 4 years ago

Nikki, it's written beautifully. Thrill is there. Expected to see some Rishi scenes. But Ansh is DV, loved his taunts to Ved and aasuon ki tanki was epic.

Continue soon, you ended at cliffhanger

Nikita_99503 thumbnail
Visit Streak 180 0 Thumbnail Easter Egg Contest Winner (2023) 0 Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 4 years ago

Amazing one dear! Keep it up! πŸ‘πŸΌ

Thank you so much...😊

Waise, itne sare atrangi naam kaha se leke aye? πŸ˜†

Don't you know? I am a part time Reevavanshi myself!!!πŸ˜†

Well, 50% credit goes to my knowledge of Hindi vocabulary and the rest 50% goes to Nazar... After all, ek saal tak dekha hai. Kuch to asar hoga hi na...πŸ˜†

Special thanks for Ansh's dialogue. Can't wait for the next part. 

Most welcome... I knew you would like that dialogue.

Edited by Nikki_srk - 4 years ago
Nikita_99503 thumbnail
Visit Streak 180 0 Thumbnail Easter Egg Contest Winner (2023) 0 Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 4 years ago

Nikki, it's written beautifully. Thrill is there. Expected to see some Rishi scenes. But Ansh is DV, loved his taunts to Ved and aasuon ki tanki was epic.

Thank you... I am glad you liked it.

Continue soon, you ended at cliffhanger

Sure... As soon as I complete the editing of the next part...

Edited by Nikki_srk - 4 years ago
magicworld thumbnail
Anniversary 5 Thumbnail Group Promotion 5 Thumbnail
Posted: 4 years ago

U write beautifully Nikki😊

Nikita_99503 thumbnail
Visit Streak 180 0 Thumbnail Easter Egg Contest Winner (2023) 0 Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: magicalM

U write beautifully Nikki😊

Thank you... Glad you liked it.πŸ€—

Hallyumint thumbnail
Anniversary 5 Thumbnail Group Promotion 5 Thumbnail Commentator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 4 years ago

Nikki 😑 I have a complaint !


Why didn’t u write sooner.  πŸ˜‰ Arre yaar your stories are terribly interesting. I really love the way your mind works. I liked the suspense at the end. Interesting choice of title can’t wait to see how it ties in.



Ansh Ansuan ka tanki πŸ˜† This was the part i missed about EDV the most



Whenever u get the time do post the 2nd part. This looks promising 




Oh and yes this was an easy read clutter wise. πŸ‘πŸΌ


Edited by Hallyumint - 4 years ago
Nikita_99503 thumbnail
Visit Streak 180 0 Thumbnail Easter Egg Contest Winner (2023) 0 Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 4 years ago

Nikki 😑 I have a complaint !

Sorry *holds ears*πŸ˜†


Why didn’t u write sooner.  πŸ˜‰ Arre yaar your stories are terribly interesting. I really love the way your mind works. I liked the suspense at the end. Interesting choice of title can’t wait to see how it ties in.

Well, actually first I got busy with my assignments, then Diwali preparations and spring cleaning... After that, you went on a vacation and Nushy had her exams... Besides, I wasn't too confident about the story myself...

 Plus, I am writing this story just because you encouraged me... So how could I post it while you weren't here??

Ansh Ansuan ka tanki πŸ˜† This was the part i missed about EDV the most

I know... Even I missed this thing about the EDV... So, I included it here...

Whenever u get the time do post the 2nd part. This looks promising 

Well, I will be posting the next part within a day or two...


Oh and yes this was an easy read clutter wise. πŸ‘πŸΌ

Thanks...

Hallyumint thumbnail
Anniversary 5 Thumbnail Group Promotion 5 Thumbnail Commentator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Nikki_srk

Nikki 😑 I have a complaint !

Sorry *holds ears*πŸ˜†


Why didn’t u write sooner.  πŸ˜‰ Arre yaar your stories are terribly interesting. I really love the way your mind works. I liked the suspense at the end. Interesting choice of title can’t wait to see how it ties in.

Well, actually first I got busy with my assignments, then Diwali preparations and spring cleaning... After that, you went on a vacation and Nushy had her exams... Besides, I wasn't too confident about the story myself...

 Plus, I am writing this story just because you encouraged me... So how could I post it while you weren't here??

Ansh Ansuan ka tanki πŸ˜† This was the part i missed about EDV the most

I know... Even I missed this thing about the EDV... So, I included it here...

Whenever u get the time do post the 2nd part. This looks promising 

Well, I will be posting the next part within a day or two...


Oh and yes this was an easy read clutter wise. πŸ‘πŸΌ

Thanks...


Have more confidence in yourself. It’s good i mean it sincerely