OS - With or Without You

Hello people, 

I wrote this OS when news of the leap and children first came out but I didn't finish it then. Unhappiness with the current track made me want to finish it now. Ironically this story has a Pari to but not really the same as the show. Anyways I hope you like it and I wish this was how the show had gone. 

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Mauli stared at the reflection in the mirror. The woman in front of her was unrecognizable. Mascara running down her cheeks, dry red lips and an outfit; too sparkly, too flamboyant, too Nandini-esque. This wasn't her. What had she been thinking? Asking Nandini to return her cheater husband to her and accepting him back; knowing fully well that he'd only come back on Nandini's request. She was a doctor for goodness sake. A well-respected, hardworking successful doctor. Why did she think she needed a man to raise her child? Kunal was pretty much jobless anyways. Her hand involuntarily ran over her stomach, where a very tiny, tiny bump was forming. Anger coursed through her veins as she remembered Kunal rendering the pregnancy as fake and then asking for a Kasam. She hadn't given it. He had proven right then and there he didn't deserve her and he most certainly didn't deserve her baby; her angel. Slowly, Mauli wiped away her tears and began packing. The job offer in Kolkata had come in a week ago and she had accepted it an hour ago. She would raise the child as a single mother. She would love her child with everything in her and be the mother and father both. She didn't need Kunal or anyone else for that matter. Because she was Dr. Mauli, no last name needed, and she was strong, kind, beautiful and she would be the perfect mother. 

15 Years Later 

Ahana raised her hand to press the doorbell but pulled back almost immediately. On a whim she had boarded the plane from Kolkata without telling her Ma, who she hoped hadn't realized she was gone yet but knew soon would. Even if she had come back form the hospital nearing 2 a.m last night her Ma would be up by 8. It was Saturday and it was their day, Ma and Ahana day. Ahana felt guilty for missing it, for putting her Ma through the worry that she probably would but she needed to come here. She needed to meet him once. Her Ma had never hidden anything from her. Ahana knew the entire truth but there were things that even her Ma couldn't properly explain. Those things needed to come from him; Kunal Malhothra, her sperm donor of a father. Not that Ahana considered him her Baba or her Papa or her anything really. No she had a Baba, even if she didn't call him that yet, even if her Ma was still in denial of her feelings for that Baba, Ahana had a father figure. Ashish Das had been there through her entire childhood. He had taught her to ride a bike and then fed her ice cream when she fell down. Arguments with her Ma, were always fixed by him taking her side. He was everything a father should be, everything Kunal Malhothra never could be. She made a mental note to herself that as soon as she got back home, she would find away to get Ashish uncle (Baba) and her Ma together. Her Ma was scared she knew, not only for herself but also for Ahana. She knew heartbreak too well but Ahana didn't miss the way how her Ma's eyes would sometimes linger longer on Ashish uncle than a normal best friends would. And of course it wasn't a hidden fact that Ashish uncle was totally and completely in love with her Ma. He would die for her and Ahana too. Yes, she would bring them together as soon as she returned to Kolkata, but first she was going to deal with this. Taking a deep breath, she rang the doorbell. 

A frenzied Nandini opened the door, looking tired beyond measured. She was beautiful Ahana would admit but everything about her seemed fake. Fake extensions, fake eyelashes and a fake personality. Ahana hated her and she would always hate her. She was the woman who had broken her Ma. Her Ma had done her utmost best to help this woman and only gotten betrayal in return. In Ahana's eyes, she was B*tch, though her Ma would have had her head for using such coarse language but no other word really fit the mistress standing in front of her. 

"Beta aap--" Nandini began but was instantly cut off. 

"Aap please mujhe beta toh mat kahiye. Main aapki koi beta nahi hoon," Ahana snapped. Almost immediately, Nandini's eyes began to moisten and Ahana had to stifle a laugh despite her anger. 

"Oh please itna bura kuch toh maine boli bhi nahi. Yeh rone ka natak please mat shuru kijiye. Mujhpe toh nahi chalegi." 

"Nandini kaun hai?" another figure appeared at the doorway. Ahana's breath hitched at the sight. 

"Thank god main apni Ma pe gayi. Aap pe jaati toh I would have look so bad nah," Ahana said with a smirk causing a frown to appear on both Kunal and Nandini's face. She didn't really think so. He was pretty handsome if she was honest but this vindictive urge to hurt him, like he had hurt her mother was beginning to fill her. Her Ma had said not to hold grudges, not to hurt anyone but these people in front of her right now, Ahana couldn't help but detest. 

"Matlab kya hai? Tum kaun ho beta?" Kunal rubbed his eyes sleepily. 

"Matlab meri Ma kitni pretty hai aur aap toh matlab like not good looking at all. Meri ma na bohot acchi hai par I think thodi bewakoof zaroor thi pehle. I mean shakal say bhi aap itni achi nahi ho aur personality bhi I think borning hai aur natue toh matlab ghatiya hi hai aapki," Ahana said it jovially, but her words were laced at anger. Her Ma would have scolded her for talking to an elder this way, no matter who they were. But Ahana's Ma was a kind forgiving soul, Ahana was a spitfire. The two people in front of her didn't warrant her respect and she'd be damned if she was going to give it to them. 

"Hum aapke Ma ko nahi jaante. Kaun hai voh aap kyun aaye hai, Kunal ji humme kuch samajh mein nahi aa rah hai," Nandini said in a victimized tone, leaning into Kunal. 

"Haw aap badam nahi dalte kya kheer mein? Yadash itni buri hai. Tch tch bas 15 saal lage aapko apni 'sabse achi dost' ko bhoolne mein?" 

Realization began to dawn on the couples face. 

"Tum Mauli ki bachhi ho?" Nandini said a grin breaking on her face, "meri Mauli--" 

"Aapki Mauli?" Ahana said exasperatedly looking between the delusional woman and her silent husband, "pagal hai kya aap? Ghar tod di, zindagi barbad kar di par abhi bhi usse apni Mauli bolne ki himmat karti hai aap? Matlab dimaag hai bhi ya nahi? Meri Ma aapki kuch nahi lagti." 

"Tum galat samajh rahe ho. Mera voh matlab-- main kisi ki ghar--" 

"Please," Ahana held up a hand, "yeh sab bholipan na aapke husband pe chalta hoga par mujhpe nahi. Gir gaye the kya inke bahon mein ya inke bed pe. Khud gayyi thi na? Kisi ne gun rakhe toh nahi kahan ki meri Ma ki husband ke saath affair shuru karo. Toh please mere saamne bahane maat banaiye." 

"Tum mere aur Mauli ki beti ho? Par Mauli ne toh kahan thi ki voh pregnant nahi hai phir?" Kunal asked quietly, reaching a hand out towards her. Immediately Ahana moved aways. 

"Ji nahi main sirf aur sirf meri Ma ki beti. Aap ke saath mera koi rishta nahi. By the way Ma ne yeh kabhi nahi kaha ki voh pregnant nahi. Sirf Kasam nahi di kyun ki aapne uski self respect ki saath khela. Kyunki aap to yeh hi chaahti thi na? Ki preganancy fake ho taaki aap apni mistress ki paas wapis aa jaye," Ahana glared at the couple. 

"Beta main aur Nandini--" 

"Please mujhe safai nahi chahi," Ahana's held her hands together in front of him, "mere nazron mein aap dono mere Ma ke gunegaar ho aur hamesha rahoge. Main bas yeh puchne aayi thi ki, pregnancy ki baat sunke aap khush kyun nahi huye? Agar voh fake pregnancy vali baat kabhi hoti hi nahi toh kya, toh kya aap mujhe aur Ma ko kabhi apnate hi nahi? Ma ko chodiye mujhe pyar karte aap? Ya iss aurat ke paas chale aate humme chodke?"

Her words were met with silence as Nandini sobbed and Kunal wracked his brain for the right response to give his daughter. He didn't have one really, not an answer that wouldn't shatter his already terrible image of him in his daughter's eyes. His daughter. That sounded so foreign to him. They had tried of course, Nandini and him for a child. The first time was a miscarriage and the second time an abortion due to complications. But he had been willing to try again but Nandini had refused. It wasn't worth it she had said and Kunal had been too tired to argue. 14 years and Nandini and him still felt like an affair. She was beautiful and he, well he guessed loved her but that was it. No friendship, no fun, no anything else. And just love didn't seem to be enough. His thinking was cut short by a ringtone he noted to be Mauli's favorite song. 

"AHANA," Mauli's voice boomed despite the phone not being on speaker, "DEHLI MAIN KYA KAR RAHA HAI TU?" 

"Ma voh main---" she was cut off by a rambling Mauli. Her Ma, from what Ahana understood, was angry, anxious and very very worried. In order to tolerate the yelling, Ahana kept the phone away from her ear and on speaker. Kunal stared awestruck at the phone in Ahana's hand. He could hear so clearly the old Mauli; the Mauli, the Jaana, she had been before Nandini entered their life. Had she moved on? From the consoling male voice he could hear in the background, he figured she had. It upset him for some reason but that sensible, albeit small, part in his brain knew he had no right. He had moved on while being married, she had every right to when she was divorced. 

"Ma, main Kunal Malhothra se milne aayi," Ahana said suddenly, biting her lip. Silence echoed over the phone. Mauli was shocked, a rare feat to be accomplished. 

"Ma kuch bolona please," she whispered, hoping against hope that her Ma wasn't mad at her. 

"Pari," Ashish's calm voice came, "tu thik hai? Abhi unke saath hai?" 

Since she could remember, Ashish had always called her Pari. She was his angel. Ashish had a story too. He had just lost his mother when a pregnant Mauli had arrived in the apartment. He used to listen to loud music and consumed himself in alcohol but that hadn't gone over well with a very hormonal Mauli. She had rushed to his apartment and given him an earful. It was the wake-up call Ishan so badly needed. The incident had not only built a permanent friendship between Mauli and Ashish but also started off his story with Ahana. He made it a point to be there for Mauli throughout the entire pregnancy and he was the first to see Ahana when she was born. Until Mauli had started to explain the entire real story to Ahana at the age of 7, she used to call him Baba and then she'd stopped. She didn't know if she had the right but she really wanted to. He felt like he dad. And he missed it really, like she did, because blood be damned, they loved each other like a true father-daughter duo. 

"Haan unki saath hoon aur bilkul thik hoon. Maine na already Kolkata ki flight bhi book karli hai. 3-4 baaje tak toh aa jaungi promise. Ma?" 

"It's okay baby. Samajhti hoon mai tumhe par mujhe bol ke bhi jaa sakti thi," Mauli said sweetly. 

"Sorry Ma, I love you." 

"I love you too shona. Khayal rakhna apna," finishing the phone call Ahana looked up to face Nandini and Kunal. While Nandini was simply crying, the guilt was evident in her father's eyes. 

"Mere sawalon ke jawab nahi di aapne. Nahi haina aapke pas? Atleast acche wale toh nahi hai joh aap mujhe dena chahte hai ya jo main sunna chahti hoon," her voice softened, "I think mujhe pata tha ki aapke paas answers nahi honge. Par, I guess main apse milna chahti thin. Curiosity thi ki aap kaise ho kya ho. Par ab mil chuki ho, par mujhe aapko jaana nahi hai." 

She smiled, a smile devoid of malice but equally devoid of love. He was her father, that connection didn't let him hate her anymore but he was her mother's culprit, and that connection wouldn't let him love her. 

"Beta aandar ao. Kheer," Ahana rolled her eyes at the clueless woman. 

"I hate Kheer," she emphasized, "aap shayed samjhe nahi. Mujhe aap done ke saath koi rishta nahi rakhni. You're nothing for me. Nafrat karti thi par ab voh bhi nahi karni. Milna tha, mil liya, kahaani khatam." 

She flashed another smile before turning on her heels, feeling every bit the confident girl her Ma had taught her to be, and flaunting out of the building. 

"Ek minute," a voice shouted from behind, just as she was about to step into the cab. Ahana twirled to find a huffing and puffing Kunal running towards her. 

"Tum khush ho aapni duniya mein?" he said out of breath. 

"Bohot khush. I love my life. Meri Ma duniya ke best Ma hai. Kabhi koi bhi cheez ka kami nahi hone di. Mujhe na kabhi aapki zaroorat hi nahi hua. Ma toh thi hi, par Ashish unlce bhi thi. Mere Baba hai voh. Mujhe sab kuch manti hai voh, aur meri Ma ki baad agar meri life mein koi maine rakti hai toh voh hai Ashish uncle, mere Baba. Main khush hoon bohot khush." 

"Aur Mauli?"

"Pehle pehle nahi thi. Main choti thi toh samajhti nahi thi par ab sochti hoon toh samajhti hoon ki meri Ma ki smile toh fake thi. Par mere liye voh strong thi. Meri Ma na. meri Hero, meri sab kuch hai. Aur ab khush bhi hai. Thoda mere wajeh se, thoda Baba ki wajah par sabse zyada khud ki wajah se. Unhe na kabhi kisi aur ka zaroorat hi nahi thi. She's no damsel in distress, she's her own knight in shining armor. Dr. Mauli. Logon ki zindagi bacha ti hai. Baba aur meri zindagi roshan karti hai. Aur ab khulke aapni zindagi jeeti hai. Voh bhi bahut khush hai."

"I'm glad," Kunal said softly, "Saare questions ke sawal main de nahi paungi par ek ka answer hai. Tumhe agar main jaanti, toh mai kabhi nahi chodti. I know tumhe iss bat pe shayed yakeen na ho aur I wouldn't blame you for that par phir bhi I wanted to say it, ki tumhe toh chodke main nahi jaati. Yeh nahi kahungi ki, I didn't want to go back to Nandini or that I didn't want the pregnancy to be false, par agar main par agar mere samne tum duniya mein aa jaate, toh tumhe chodke nahi jaati main. Tumhaari Ma itni achi hai ki shayad I would have fallen in love with her again. Par jitna khush tum dono ab hona, utni khushi nahi de pati main. Kyunki I'm not that good of a person, unfortunately.  I want more than anything to ask to be a part of your life. But I won't. Because I really don't deserve it. I just hope you and your Ma and, and your Baba, you all stay happy." 

"Thank you," and instinctively because this would probably be the first and last she would get the chance, Ahana hugged her father. Shocked at first, he returned it with more fervor. As they pulled away, she gave him a small wave before getting on the taxi, ready to return to her home; her family. 

It wasn't after she was far too gone that Kunal realized he hadn't even caught her name. He knew Mauli had yelled it through the phone but he hadn't really heard it. Like too many things in his life, this was too late. It was once in a lifetime thing for him, meeting his daughter. Someone else would applaud when she graduated, someone else would do her kanyadaan, someone else would hold her child for the first time. Not him; never him. He wasn't destined to know her, not one thing, not even her name. And frankly, if Kunal was completely honest, it wasn't even half the punishment he deserved. But he hadn't lied when he said it. He really did hope against hope that Mauli would be happy and his daughter would be happy too. He didn't deserve it but they most definitely did. 

Loved it dear