Lack of remorse and victim blaming- the problem with SBRK

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Posted: 5 years ago
I've been a silent reader in this forum for long but after recent episodes feel as if I must share my views. I am not against showing an extra martial affair on Indian tv and if anything think it's a subject that should be addressed as it is a true reflection of modern society. However I have two major issues which I feel are ruining the show for me:

First of all the lack of remorse shown by Kunal and Nandini. It's a sad fact of life but a married man or even woman can fall out of love with their spouse (often without reason- will address this in point two) and in love with someone else. It's unfair on the spouse but it happens, wether we like it or not. Showing a husband cheating on his lovely wife (as Mauli is!) is uncomfortable and sad for us viewers to watch, but it can happen. The extra martial affair to evolve from emotional to physical also can happen. However what the issue here is the total lack of remorse that is shown. Both Kunal and Nandini don't seem to have any regard for Maulis feelings here which doesn't make sense as both characters are shown to be good people at heart. Yes good people can also sometimes make the mistake of falling in love while married or in committed relationships. But good people would be guilt ridden, not behaving like love sick teenagers and taking selfies and secretly holding hands during pujas. This lack of concern for Maulis feelings really doesn't make sense to me and the fault must lie with the cvs as opposed to the characters themselves. Somewhere down the line the cvs could show Kunal and Nandini together and the viewers may even accept them if they dealt with the situation responsibly, instead of casting Mauli aside as if she is insignificant, which is currently being shown. The kind of scenes we are being shown currently are doing less to teach society and more spreading a dangerous message that it's ok to trample all over someone's marriage if you feel your love is pure and sent from God.

My second issue is what was said by Zoya in the precap to Mauli- aap khud sochiye aapke aur kunal ke rishte me kya kami reh gayi- think yourself what was lacking in your and kunals relationship. This kind of disgusting victim blaming was portrayed by zoya herself in Bepanah and now she is spreading it here also. There doesn't HAVE to be anything wrong or lacking in Maulis relationship to make her husband cheat. Yes often there are problems between couples which can cause EMAs but that isn't always the case. Before Nandini came along Kunal and Mauli were shown as the perfect couple, so why must Mauli now look for problems and flaws in herself to justify her husband's cheating? The sad fact is that some women can be the most perfect wives to their husbands and they will still cheat. So far the cvs have shown Mauli do absolutely nothing to deserve Kunal cheating on her so now to have someone tell her to look for the problems within her and her relationship is a dangerous and disgusting message to send.

My final point here is that in my eyes the majority of blame lies with Kunal. Yes Nandini is being a bad friend and very selfish but we must not forget she is also an incredibly vulnerable woman. She has been abused and exploited by her husband for years so I can see how she could fall for someone as loving and protective as Kunal. Once again it doesn't justify her lack of remorse towards Mauli but still I can have sympathy for Nandini and her situation. But there is absolutely no redemption for Kunal in my eyes. He had the perfect wife in Mauli and other than physical attraction and the need to play hero/satisfy his saviour complex I can't understand kunals behaviour at all. For me the only character worth watching the show for is Mauli but if they start showing her blaming herself as zoya wants her to do then will sadly have to switch off.
Posted: 5 years ago
Wasn't a fan of what Zoya said either - perhaps she was speaking from her own experience since her husband cheated on her because she lived in a world in her own without knowing the problems in her marriage ... Zoya doesn't know all about the lives of Kunal/Nandini/Mauli however I guess she's planting the seed in Mauli to do some detective work because things aren't what they seem,

Not saying there is any problem with Kunal-Mauli's marriage bc the CV's have completely disregarded any reason there and as you point out yourself  - EMA can happen without any reason at all

I think the CV's are trying to find some reason to justify the EMA since everything is a mess and there is so much uproar...they'll probably make it out to be something Mauli did in the marriage - it's a horrible way to proceed the show, but if the show makers are hell bent on continuing this nonsense, then it seems they're aiming to make Mauli the reason for Kunal's infidelity 

I have no words for Nandini - she's a full on backstabber with no feasible redemption arc...complete gone case. The CVs could make her completely psycho/dark character who has lost all sense due to her trauma - kind of like Maya in Behyadh 
Edited by sweetsorrow18 - 5 years ago
Posted: 5 years ago
Kunal feels that he is in love with Nandini..then what has he been feeling for Mauli!!!
I also felt that the two most important people in Mauli's life don't give a hoot for her feelings..and romancing right under her nose. Even when Mauli was introducing Nandini to Chakor, there was not an ounce of guilt on Kunal's face.
Posted: 5 years ago
Why was there no issue in that marriage before Nandini started dancing in rain? And suddenly after rain dance he realised he was living in unhappy marriage all these years f**king Mauli's life day and night. I will never understand this falling out of love without any reason, but even if such thing exist, he should have fallen out of love without any reason before Nandini entered. 

Even if there was any problem, still neither husband nor wife has right to cheat. They can talk and solve, or they can talk and separate. If they want to find a problem in marriage, they should have included one from begining, but they themselves made them extra perfect and now they are indicating toward non existing issue.

This so called bold and unique concept is nothing more than a big blunder. Problem is that they have painted Rajdeep extra black and Mauli as extra white. They have included overdose of violence in Nandini-Rajdeep marriage and overdose of perfection in kunal-Mauli marriage. Now, they want people to accept injustice happening with Mauli as side effect of Rajdeep abusing Nandini.  Like everytime Rajdeep would come and torture Nandini, in return Nandini would go more close to kunal, and that's alright for them. That's total apple and orange comparison concept. They are narrating a story 'abused has right to turn abuser'. 
Edited by Metis - 5 years ago
Posted: 5 years ago
Originally posted by White..Magic


😆
I remember Maya fixing camara even in washroom to keep tab on her husband, and same face as Zoya was taking all kind of bullshit from aditya when the show started. Maya used to imagine her husband cheating on her and making his life miserable based on imagination, but same face as zoya calling EMA as 'Paak'. 😆 Zoya is completely twisted minded woman, even Aditya should run as far as posdible from her. High level bimbo. All kind of illegitimate relations are 'Paak' in her dictionary. She is not loose character like Nandini, but if we compare their mentality, both would look like soul sisters.

So, obviously she'll be talking in favor of Paak rishta and asking Mauli to go and find faults in her marriage forcefully even if there was not any to begin with.

Why was there no issue in that marriage before Nandini started dancing in rain? And suddenly after rain dance he realised he was living in unhappy marriage all these years f**king Mauli's life day and night. I will never understand this falling out of love without any reason, but even if such thing exist, he should have fallen out of love without any reason before Nandini entered. 

Even if there was any problem, still neither husband nor wife has right to cheat. They can talk and solve, or they can talk and separate. If they want to find a problem in marriage, they should have included one from begining, but they themselves made them extra perfect and now they are indicating toward non existing issue.

This so called bold and unique concept is nothing more than a big blunder. Problem is that they have painted Rajdeep extra black and Mauli as extra white. They have included overdose of violence in Nandini-Rajdeep marriage and overdose of perfection in kunal-Mauli marriage. Now, they want people to accept injustice happening with Mauli as side effect of Rajdeep abusing Nandini.  Like everytime Rajdeep would come and torture Nandini, in return Nandini would go more close to kunal, and that's alright for them. That's total apple and orange comparison concept. They are narrating a story 'abused has right to turn abuser'. 




Perfect 👏 couldn't have said it better 
Posted: 5 years ago
This is wat I ve been telling like a broken record in the forum & irritating the shit out of every1 in the forum. How is there absolutely no guilt or remorse? Even spouses who never loved their partners will feel guilt/unease in the presence of their partner esp when the lover is also in the same room. In fact tats how most of them get caught. They arouse the suspicion of their spouse by their behavior.

Here K & N r showing no guilt or fear or unease. So amount of psychobabble or mumbo jumbo from the forum waasis can make me understand tis 😕
Posted: 5 years ago
Kunal & Nandini not having any remorse or guilt about betraying Mauli & roamancing in presence of her is whats wrong. can understand them falling for each other. Can get Kunal getting attracted to or being in love with Nandini. But that doesn't explain them acting like immature people.
Posted: 5 years ago
There is no comarison in Zoya and Mauli except for the fact that both were cheated and Zoya feels that she wasn't available for Yash when he needed someone to understand his conflicts. She thinks lack of emotional intimacy led to PooSh. 
Even though it was absolutely wrong but it still looked convincing. 
This EMA doesn't look convincing since Kunan have no remorse of what he is doing even when they are in front of Mauli. Lack of conscience is appaling here. 

Zoya doesn't know this situation. But she just gave an advice from her persective and experience. On some levels, it doesn't apply on Mauli at all. Since, it's Kunal who is maintaining the distance even when Mauli is repeatedly asking him about what's wrong. Mauli is there for Kunal while Zoya wasn't there for Yash emotionally on many occassions. 

That affair even though wrong looked convincing on some levels,  while this one doesn't. Ema is real but it has to strike the right cord on some level to understand. 
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