*From & To Sathish* - Thread 4 - Page 2

Time away from her is time spent lying awake on the bed
Life away from her is living a lie in my head
I don't know what writers and poets said
But hear my thoughts instead
And that time away from her is time being undead

                                         Jannal oram 115


In psychology, a first impression is the event when one person first encounters another person and forms a mental image of that person. Impression accuracy varies depending on the observer and the target (person, object, scene, etc.) being observed. First impressions are based on a wide range of characteristics: age, race, culture, language, gender, physical appearance, accent, posture, voice, number of people present, and time allowed to process. The first impressions individuals give to others could greatly influence how they are treated and viewed in many contexts of everyday life.

The police station is looked on by the public as a place to avoid,a weird place that is ventured into only as a lost resort and a place largely shunned by all kinds of people from the public.Policemen,the police dept and their work places are largely left to their own styles of operating and the majority of people that i know of and even me have come away from the contact with the men in khaki left with a bitter taste in the mouth and mind.

But things have improved and the cops are more approachable and lend their ears more readily and pay more attention to the public and their small and large grievances alike.Yet,a deep aversion or even repulsion exists in the minds of the public when you mention police or maama which is actually very derogatory to the men in uniform for most of them join the force with good intentions but become hardened and also turn bitter.One is seeing and dealing with the scum,evil and all manners of criminals and the other is because of the ungodly working hours and poor pay for the amount of effort that each and everyone put in their jobs.

Maybe it is this anger,bitterness and the thoughts that they are avoided and looked down upon by the very people they protect that gives them that look,that policekaaran kannu as it locally termed and they see everything and everyone with that look which who knows might be the look and feel of their soul.

But taking the liberty to elaborate,let me take you into what cops actually think,feel and expect from us and here i give you a few examples and i bet you will be surprised.

                                what cops want


Most news can be misleading

They appreciate being appreciated

The world has made them cynical

They know people are afraid of them and that bothers them

They and their families too are threatened with death and injury

They get nervous and scared too

Listening to them is the simplest way to avoid conflicts

The public should be better informed

They too get angry and upset when officers abuse their power

They want to get to know us



A police constable stood in the entrance and he deferred doing what he would do to most of the civilians that entered the station for the minute he laid eyes,his police eyes on Raman who was marching boldly into the compound,the police knew a good and successful advocate from one who worked for a biriyani and a cutting in the tasmac.Honestly,it is the truth and the reality on the streets and outside the courts.

Normally,the constable who stood guard will ask the civilian coming in as to what he wants or who they have come to see and generally grandstand making himself the man of the hour and enjoy lording over the people who cringe in fear and worry at they very sight of a khaki uniform forgetting that he is just a constable.

But then that is with people from the lower strata of life and not with people who are rich,powerful,educated and definitely not with lawyers who look like they are really good lawyers and in reality are.

Raman climbed the four steps into the station,halting briefly to recognise the constable and warmly said " Good morning" and the constable who recognising the accent of the english and the look of raman,shrunk a few sizes and grinning widely,wished him back " vanakkam,vaanga sir."

The large hall of the mylapore police station was like a faculty room in a school and in one glance,raman took in the head constable who had just started his day shift and placing his tiffin box on the desk mumbled loudly " adaa,ennappa ithu,my wife does not give me anything other than idlis or pongal and then she keeps pointing to my large tummy."

Raman knew that he was the highest ranking officer at that moment and going up to his desk,whispered " vanakkam" and the head constable doing the same thing that the constable at the entrance had done " vaanga iyya,sit down.sollunga,how can i help you?"

Raman looked at him " i need to see the inspector" and the head constable " sir has gone for his morning shift rounds and should be back any moment.please wait sir."

Raman nodded and thanked him and then his eyes caught the news paper on the table of the head constable and cursed silently for there he was with vijaya bhaskar and his parents at the wedding that they had attended the previous day.

If Raman thought that he could finish his work of filing an FIR without being reconginsed from the newspapers,then he was wrong for like i mentioned policekaaran kannu does not miss much and definitely the head constable with years of service,immediately caught his expression and his eyes instantly went to the papers.

Rather than jumping at the papers,the head constable a veteran ate his pongal and sambhaar and smoothly laying his hands on the thanthi paper,flicked in casually and saw the headlines and was slightly disappointed for he had been suspicious of raman and his grimace and had expected some crime but there was nothing like that.

And then,the head constable saw the color pics and recognised raman next to vijaya bhaskar and then everything changed for there is a pecking order and surely the grasp of power that exudes and flows from THE FORT touches everything and charging that too with its govt and ruling power.

The head constable sat erect and for a moment was lost as to the protocol of treating people close to the ruling party and did not know how to go about asking raman as to who he was or waht he wanted.

Just like the public wanted to avoid the cops,the cops themselves try to avoid men in power for they are left feeling uncomfortable and abused.

And now here sat raman whose pics with the future chief minister vijaya bhaskar splashed in color in all the news papers and the poor man just sat there looking at raman.

Raman's face filled with irritation and just when he thought of going and waiting outside,the sounds of a jeep coming in alerted him and everyone else to the arrival of the station inspector.

Head constable and all constables included jumped up with their caps on and saluted the Inspector who acknowledged their salutes and shooting a glance at raman walked into his cabin and the head constable ran behind him and raman looked on with irritation for he prided himself on his powers to do his duty and did not require publicity of any kind to aid in that.for he was a man who believed in the law and had firm faith in the courts.And moreover his high court bar council membership was a powerful post by itself and which would last for many decades while parties would come to power and also disappear the very next day.

The head constable came running out and requested raman to go into the inspectors room.

Raman stood up and thanked him,which left the man preening in delight and raman carrying his handbag walked tall into the inspectors room and Inspector Devasagayam looked up and politely asked raman to take a seat.

Raman took out his cream and blue embossed visiting card and if the Inspector had any doubts about raman's pedigree,it vanished for he sat erect in the seat and leaned forward with his hands on the desk " Mr.raman,how can i help you today?"


Edited by deepak_satish - 6 years ago

                                Songs playing in my atmosphere


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6TXPNybrmk

Kodaline - Brother

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXjaqhAkZB4

Keith urban female


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yW7w8F2TVA

James Arthur - Say You Won't Let Go

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBumgq5yVrA

Passenger | Let Her Go

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS9o1FAszdk

The Script - The Man Who Can't Be Moved

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNznPGirzfg

Max Jury - Numb

                                    
Edited by deepak_satish - 6 years ago

                                  Jannal oram 117


Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.


Raman exited left from Kutchery road and his eyes caught the soft yellow lights of the inside of the towering st.thomas church that was opposite him and then was soon driving swiftly on santhome high road exited it and entered the marina beach stretch called Kamarajar promenade passing the Bay of bengal that lay on the right like a blue carpet and thinking how lucky the many popular people of tamil history and culture that stood on the marina enjoying the sea and the views but also unluckily being bathed by crow shit,everyday and constantly.He thanked the rains for at last keeping the men and women in black and stone clean and free of birds and their refuse.

It was a short drive and soon,Raman passed the police headquarters on his left and taking a left,entered dr.radhakrishnan saalai and soon turned again for a left and then immediately turned right into chennai citi center and waited as the security checked his vehicle and waved him by.He dived down and down to basement 2 and stopped again to get the car pass and soon found a spot in the bowels of the complex and the sounds and workings of all the central air conditioners never failed to amaze him with their hums and grunts and raman stood for a second enjoying the rather alien feel of the basement car parking.

Then recollecting inspector devasagayam's eyes and advice,he knew that the cop would be sending a posse of constables to take over the scene of crime and also to subtly give him some security and that meant not much time left to dilly dally and so Raman strode quickly and rode the escalator to the first floor and then quickly mounted the stairs and entered the second floor of the chennai citi center where landmark had its bookstore.

It was 9.15 am and the mall looked largely deserted although there were the usual teenage couples hanging around here and there and the usual group of college and high school kids who maybe had come to catch the 10.00 am show at INOX cinemas.More than anything,Raman realised that people generally hung around single,doubles or in groups just to loiter and shoot th breeze,to see and to be seen.What they saw and what they wanted to see them is well,opposites and unlike poles.

Raman turned the corner and headed towards the vast six door entrance of Landmark and his eyes took in everything and raman's eyes saw everything and missed nothing.He saw the shutter was downed nearly three quarters and from where he was,he could see many feet,a few of them uniformed in blue pants and black shoes and  he counted three pairs of sneakers and floater foot wear and then he laid eyes on the man who stood guard outside the shutter and Raman's senses tingled and alerted him to danger and clear,present and immediate danger.

Raman's advocate brain worked out what was happening and he instantly ruled out robbery and he knew that the thugs who had attacked shreekanth last night had come back for the same thing that he had come and that meant the disks which contained the security camera footage.

Raman adjusted his cuff and casting his eyes to his left walked past the man who stood outside the bookstore and immediatelt turned left into a corridor of small shops and saw that two girls standing outside a service door that obviously was the side entrance to landmark associates.

He looked at them and asked how many and one girl answered " there are five of them sir.And they are beating up our manager and there are six of our colleagues inside.We both came to keep some boxes out here in the corridor for them to be cleared by the maintanence staff and so we just managed to stay out of their clutches."

Raman placed a finger on his lips " calm down and call the police and don't worry everyone is going to be just fine."

He entered the door and turning to the two young girls " i am locking the door now from inside and i request you to get away from here and wait until the cops arrive.Leave now."

Saying this,raman shut the door and taking long strides exited the large store room of the book store and entered the air conditioned floor of the store itself and heard mild and mellow piano music being played on bose speakers and raman shook his head for he never liked elevator music or this vague and unknown quantity of so called lounge music.

And then,the quiet and eerie 12,000 sq feet area of the store was comically disturbed by a loud ringtone of a mobile that obviously belonged to a fan of the one and only superstar.

Podhuvaaga En Manasu Thangam
Oru Pottiyinnu Vandhu Vittaa Singam
Unmaiye Solven, Nalladhe Seiven
Vetri Mel Vetri Varum
Aaduvom Paaduvom Kondaaduvom
Aah, Aanandham Kaanuvom Ennaalume


The shelves stood about five feet and a few inches and so the six feet figure of raman could be seen by everybody,friends and foes included.Raman's walk and his calm body langauge projected peace but his mind was now a seething and raging volcano and although his body did not know it as yet,his brain had already worked out the situation and how best to tackle it and then just forgot about it for his hands and legs would move for the years of training had blessed him with supreme muscle memory,which meant,his body would react and strike without even having to tell it to strike.

Raman saw the manager,a middle aged man who was bleeding from his forehead and stood crying in fear and pain and also the other staff members who stood petrified as they faced their five captors who brandished large wicked looking knives.All five had scarves around the neck and raman knew instantly that they were there for the same purpose as he and that they meant business and in their terms it clearly meant that they would kill and would not stop killing until they got what they wanted.

The man who stood facing the manager was obviously their leader and he turned to face this new and unknown threat that advanced boldly towards them and brandishing his knife he moved towards raman threateningly and as in ancient times,the two worlds of good and evil collided.

The man,obviously a north indian was mouthing some expletives and raman knew that it was not hindi,bengali or marathi but some other langauge and then the man right handed,holding the knife in his right hand swung it from his right with all his might and found nothing but empty air.

Raman,a grand master in judo stepped back and delivered a Mae-giri with his left leg to the right side of the now exposed man and in the nearly quiet of the bookstore called landmark,everyone present heard ribs cracking and the pitiful scream of the man as he collapsed to the floor.


"You must be shapeless, formless, like water. When you pour water in a cup, it becomes the cup. When you pour water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle. When you pour water in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can drip and it can crash. Become like water my friend. Bruce lee



                                       Mae-geri: Front kick

The front kick in martial arts is a kick executed by lifting the knee straight forward, while keeping the foot and shin either hanging freely or pulled to the hip, and then straightening the leg in front of the practitioner and striking the target area. It is desirable to retract the leg immediately after delivering the kick, to avoid the opponent trying to grapple the leg and (unless a combination is in process) to return to stable fighting stance.

The front Kick described is the typical basic front kick of Karate or Tae Kwon Do. But Front Kick can also be defined more broadly as a straight forward kick directly to the front, and then include several variations from many different styles. A front kick can be delivered forward in a penetrating way (hip thrust), or upwards to attack the head.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcsja0pVFt0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FAgUAWcIig

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0dHwNLWMz4

Jannal oram 118


"You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might pray also in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance.? Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet


Prayer (from the Latin precari "to ask earnestly, beg, entreat") is an invocation or act that seeks to activate a rapport with an object of worship through deliberate communication.From Biblical times to today, the most common form of prayer is to directly appeal to God to grant one's requests. This in many ways is the simplest form of prayer. Some have termed this the social approach to prayer.

Various spiritual traditions offer a wide variety of devotional acts. There are morning and evening prayers, graces said over meals, and reverent physical gestures. Some Christians bow their heads and fold their hands. Some Native Americans regard dancing as a form of prayer.Some Sufis whirl. Hindus chant mantras. Jewish prayer may involve swaying back and forth and bowing. Muslims practice salat (kneeling and prostration) in their prayers. Quakers keep silent. Some pray according to standardized rituals and liturgies, while others prefer extemporaneous prayers. Still others combine the two.


                                                                           I pray for you

There is an even more powerful version of praying to god and the supreme creator and that is when you pray for another person,for another soul and you pray from the most purest and powerful part of your soul.That prayer stems from good,the real and true love.

When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them, and sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you... Life is full of blessings

Jeeva sat at her desk holding her head,confused,scared,hurt,totally lost and lonely.But more than anything,she felt an unbearable guilt at having forced raman and their relationship to such a situation and then she remembered his face,his lips and more importantly his words " i love you jeeva and i will love you and stand by you,not matter what the odds and the situations are and i will never let go."

The weight,the burden of her pain and emotions raged in her body and getting up she went to the window and looked out at the city as it lay under the november monsoon clouds and looking up at the skies,prayed " god,if you can hear me,please grant me this.grant raman a beautiful life and protect him for he is the pillar on which we have built our lives on and it is his strength that guides us and lights our lives."

In landmark bookstore,on the 2nd floor of chennai citi center,Raman stepped over the fallen man who had been beating the manager and his staff members and advanced towards the remaining four members who looked at each other and with their knives and long sword like weapons moved forward to face this new threat.

The four thugs from orissa knew that this was it and that now the situation had changed dramatically for now it was kill or be killed or worse be arrested for they knew that by now the cops would be on the way and that meant that if they did not move now then, they would never be able to escape and throwing caution to the wind,the four slowly spread into half a circle and began to cover and crowd raman.

The store manager,bleeding from a cut in his cheek,held it and along with his few staff members stood as they a live show,a demonstration of what the art of self defence was and what martial arts really meant and how it should be used for defence and sometimes for offence.


Raman stood calmly,his arms loose and feet nimble and spread a little wide for easy transference of power to any one of his legs and in the direction that it led him.He was not the least bothered about the knives or the wicked looking swords for he knew that he would be able to avoid them and worse comes to worse,he would manage to escape with the least amount of injuries.

                                         MANY YEARS AGO

Raman knew that the situation had escalated to the maximum and that meant use of deadly force and the words of Grandmaster Toshiro Daigo,Kodokan 10th dan who is one of only three living Kodokan 10th dan (and one of only 15 to have attained this rank), having been promoted at the New Year Kagami biraki Ceremony, January 8, 2006 along with Ichiro Abe and Yoshimi Osawa.

Kodokan  or the Kodokan Institute, is the headquarters of the worldwide judo community. Literally, ko means "to lecture", do means "way," and kan is "a public building" together translating as "a place for the study of the way." The Kodokan was founded in 1882 by Kano Jigoro, the founder of judo, and is now an eight-story building in Tokyo.

Raman had been a part of the Indian national Judo team that had taken part in the exhibition matches that had taken place on the same day as the ceremony and had won two of the three matches and narrowly lost the third one.Raman had been 19 years old then and in his final year of college and already had 8 years in the art of judo was a certified 2nd dan black belt.

Later in the evening,Raman had gone for a quiet stroll to check out Tokyo and after walking for nearly 30 minutes had found himself in a quiet and serene area and had walked with a smile plastered on his face for the area gave him a sense of peace and spirituality.

Then spotting a small green bamboo gate and realising that it was a temple for Buddha,raman had entered the temple premises and leaving his sandals outside,had washed his feet,hands,face and had entered the rather desolate place and had sat down to meditate for a few minutes.

Lost in the beauty of the place,Raman had lost track of time and on opening his eyes found that he had meditated for nearly an hour.Then realising that he was not alone,he turned to the old man who sat a about ten feet away from him and not wanting to disturb the gentleman's peace,slowly got up and had gone forward to bid goodbye to the Buddha who sat there lost in an eternal trance.

After bending low and whispering prayer,Raman had turned around to leave and then his eyes caught the eye of the man who sat there staring back at him.Raman had immediately bowed and hurried towards him and falling to his knees again bent his head low in total respect and devotion.

Kodokan Toshiro Daigo had gently patted his head and then had spoken in flawless English " Child,did you realise the mistake you did and why you lost your third match when you could have easily won it."

Raman nodded " yes master,i hesitated to use my full power for i thought it would be too much of an overkill and would also convey a sense of arrogance to the others who were there and because i let my mind wander for that one brief moment,my opponent Taishi mifune threw me to the mat and beat me in that match which was tied until then."

Kodokan Toshiro Daigo smiled " child,heed my advise and remember it for in your life,you will cross many moments like that and if you hesitate,then it will mean loss,terrible loss.So,please remember that if you are going to use deadly force,then don't hesitate and unleash hell and trust yourself and your judgement."


                                       Landmark bookstore

Raman remembered Kodokan Toshiro Daigo words for like this situation,he had made use of the great masters wisdom only once before and that was when he had intervened to save Vijaya bhaskar and his sister that evening in the college campus and now like then innocent lives were at stake and once again he stood calm and collected while his enemies gathered around him.

His mind tranquil and calm like a deep,blue lake with nary a ripple on its surface,Raman stood lightly on his feet,ready to transfer power to any one of his four limbs and at that moment,his hands and legs were hammers in disguise and then the attack was launched.

The first of the four was the nearest and he stepped forward and came within raman's reach and his right leg acted with a mind of its own and burst in a full front kick and with contact made,a milisecond later the same leg speared back in a reverse kick with ramans full weight on his left toes and it was done so gracefully and skillfully and so quickly that it was over in a blink of an eye and two more crumpled to the floor,the front and the first thug with a broken jaw and the rear and second one with a crumpled sternum.

85 kilos of pure muscle and bone that made ramans legs had accelerated and delivered nearly a 1000 pounds of force in a split second and now the other two screamed and jumped at him and raman changed tactics and holding his arms to his face like a boxer went to his knee and another 1000 pounds of force landed on the tummy of one of the thugs and the last one now really lost and scared began to back out and that is when the whole situation got worse,way worse than raman could have foreseen.

The sixth man who stood watch outside the entrance with the shutter down,entered and without any notice raised his handgun and shot at Raman.


                                         Kanchipuram kamakshi amman

Raman's parents and jeevas parents stood waiting for kanchi kamakshi's darisanam and the curtain was opened and the kanchi amman smiled at all of them benevolently.Shaktivel folded his hands in prayer and whispered " amma,i pray for my son,i pray for the well being of raman.I don't want anything but his well being.And if it is possible,then yes,i want Raman to be born as my son again and again."

valliammai prayed " kamakshi thaaye,please bless my son with a long and healthy life and bless him and jeeva with a happy married life.That is enough for me."

Mani prayed " amma,i pray for the safety and well being of my family and raman and his family.Just grant me enough life and energy to see my daughters get married and then you can call me whenever you want and i will come readily.Please bless Raman with more strength and a healthy and long life."

Kamakshi stood before kamakshi " mother,you have given me the greatest husband a wife can wish for,blessed me with two lovely children and made me the proudest mother and now you have brought raman and his parents into our hearts and so i pray for his well being and his parents well being.I want nothing but the best for all my loved ones.And is pain,sorrow and suffering should come our way,let me take it and bear it instead of my family.That is all i ask of you,mother.Please grant my wish and bless us all."


                                     Landmark bookstore

The man who had stood outside the store peeped in and was shocked to see his gang members on the ground and only one stood and was about to attack the man who stood before him and without any hesitation,the man drew a handgun and shot randomly at Raman.

Unlike what is shown in the films,the sixth man used a handgun but not a high tech automatic that the police dept and armed services use,but rather an old revolver and when he cocked the trigger and shot at Raman,the loud noise and the ugly snout of the weapon was enough and he just went low and dived behind then bookshelves and then two things happened,both in favor of Raman and those who were present there.

The second and third bullet missed raman and hit the fifth thug who fell to the ground screaming in pain and the man shooting adjusted his aim and stepping forward moved in the direction oframan and shot again and the handgun exploded in his hand.

A handgun or for that matter any kind of firearm can explode,malfunction at any given time and that is why gun owners are told and taught how to maintain their firearms by regularly cleaning it and oiling it and also store it in a dry place.

The revolver that was being used had been purchased on the black market and the shooter had no shooting skills or any idea how to maintain a handgun and had mostly used it to threaten people when it was required.

The handgun exploded and the reasons could have been because of an

Obstructed barrel
Incorrect ammo caliber in firearm
Cracked/weak barrel
Reloaded(& sometimes top shelf as well) ammo with too great a charge of gunpowder
Ammo with too little gunpowder in case, doesn't leave the barrel, then you pull the trigger on another round,,,,,boom

It exploded and the man who was holding it lost three of his fingers just like that and the shrapnel from the ripped barrel sped at great speed and sprayed into his face and he wailed and screamed in pain as one metal fragment ripped into his eye.

Raman leapt to his feet but no more action would be necessary for all six were down and the manager and his staff members just looked at Raman as if he had descended from the heavens and they came closer to him and he looked at them " are you all okay.is anybody seriously hurt.Please tell me for i will rush you to the hospital?"

The manager looked at Raman " sir,we don't see such stuff even in films and yet here you are and thank god safe and sound.Sir,who are you sir?"

Raman smiling shyly " I am just an advocate and the reason i came here was to meet you and ask your help for my case?"

The manager looked at him with wide eyes " sir,you just saved our lives and we owe everything.so,please ask and don't hesitate and we will do it."

Raman hesitated " i think these people here came for the same reason as i have done.It was my client shreekanth who was hurt last night and so i came here to see the footage,that's all.I have already filed an FIR in the station and so i guess it is okay and legal to see the footage."

The manager grabbed raman's hands " Boss,you are not just an advocate but god for only god could have so miraculously arrived at the correct time to save us all.

Please wait for a moment and i will be right back."

Running into the office,he quickly inserted a brand new 64 gb USB 3.0 version flash drive into a computer terminal and began to transfer the last nights security footage into it.

Sub inspector Matthew kannan parked his bullet near the entrance of the mall and the security men deferring to his uniform quickly informed him that they had gun fire in the mall.

Sub inspector Matthew kannan  immediately alerted his inspector and the area Assistant commissioner who in turn informed the commissioner and in a matter of minutes hundreds of armed commandos and police teams landed and surrounded the mall called chennai citi center.

The police headquarters is situated on the marina facing the gandhi statue and the chennai citi center mall was about half a km away and hence the quick arrival of the police teams.

Shots fired,gun fire,terrorists,attack,hostages were the words used and it spread like wildfire and had a viral effect and ten minutes later,the tv crews,journalists descended on the mall hungry for breaking news and ratings.


                                        Inside Landmark bookstore

Raman checked his mobile and saw many whats app messages from his lawyer friends and opening them saw that the place he was in at the moment was the eye of the storm.Realising what had happened,he looked at all of them and softly " The police are here not in dozens but hundreds.Please i request you to not reveal my looks or who i am and give me some time to leave quietly."

Looking at the manager and looking at the cameras which had so obviously captured everything " Is it possible to erase what has been recorded" and the manager sadly " no sir,for this feed also goes to the main security mall database and that is not in my control."

Raman shook his head " no,not necessary for then you will get into a lot of trouble and they cops will ask you why you erased the footage from your servers."

Looking at all of them " so,tell the truth but be vague about it and it will take them at least some time to get to me and that too only for questioning."

Saying this Raman bid goodbye to all of them and sneaked out of the side entrance and carrying his handbag and wearing his coat that informed the world who he was,slowly made his way out,one among the many panic stricken people who were rushing out to save themselves for suddenly a rumor that the mall had been taken over by terrorists."

Raman slipped away and out of the multi layered cordons that had been placed around the mall and standing far away from the place took out his mobile and made the call.

Vijaya bhaskar,son of cabinet minister durai pandi sat next to his sister Kavita and both were glued to the 100 inches led tv as channel after channel brandished " breaking news.Terrorists take over chennai citi center" and  both were worried for the people who might have been taken hostages by the terrorists.

Cursing violence and the terrorists who indulged and dealt with it,Vijay got up and went to his room to change from his tee and tracks to formal clothes for he had an event to attend in a well known and popular college and where he was going to speak about the current youth and their goals for the future.

Vijay's mobile rang and his sister kavita picked it up and answered the call and she heard him on the other side " Ma'am,My name is Raman.Can i please talk to mr.vijaya bhaskar if he is there or if he is busy,can you please ask him to call me immediately."

Kavitha's heart missed many beats for the man she had been wanting to call had called himself and she answered " Raman sir,this is vijay's sister kavita speaking.If you can kindly hold for a moment,i will take the phone to him.Sir,how have you been?"

Raman " i am fine miss.kavita and i hope you are well too and please no sir and just call me raman or ram."

Kavita boldly " okay ram and only if you call me kavita without any miss."

She ran to vijay's room and gave him the phone and her lips formed the name " raman."

Vijay grabbed the phone " sir,raman sir.Such a pleasant surprise."

Raman slowly explained the situation to vijay who thinking quickly " raman sir,no problem.Please stay where you are and i will pick you up in twenty minutes and then we will decide what to do and how to go about it."


Vijaya bhaskar dressed quickly and ran towards his car and the driver got in and then he was pulled back by kavitha " Anna,what is going on? is he okay?"

Vijay with a smile " he is okayma.but looks like the others he has left behind are not okay and the situation is slightly messy and so he needs my help to sort it out.Actually it is messy for him but it is a situation that can make him instant hero and a person who will be familiar all over the world in the next few minutes."

Seeing her confusion " Raman sir did what raman sir is meant and born to do and that is to save,help,protect and defend and he has done it the same way that he protected us and saved our lives."


    A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself. ...
    A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles. ...
    A hero is someone who understands the responsibility that comes with his freedom.

                                   Surprising Ways That Heroes Improve Our Lives

Heroes produce a recently identified emotion called "elevation

Recent research suggests that heroes and heroic action may evoke a unique emotional response which Jonathan Haidt at NYU has called elevation. Haidt borrowed the term elevation from Thomas Jefferson, who used the phrase moral elevation to describe the euphoric feeling one gets when reading great literature.

When people experience elevation, they feel a mix of awe, reverence, and admiration for a morally beautiful act. The emotion is described as similar to calmness, warmth, and love. Haidt argues that elevation is "elicited by acts of virtue or moral beauty; it causes warm, open feelings in the chest.

 Heroes heal our psychic wounds

Tens of thousands of years ago, when humans first tamed fire, tribe members huddled around a communal fire at the end of each day for warmth and protection. But the act of gathering around fire encouraged another activity -- storytelling. The first stories told were no doubt tales of heroes and heroic action, and these tales were a salve for people's psychological wounds.

Hero stories calmed people's fears, buoyed their spirits, nourished their hopes, and fostered important values of strength and resilience. Life now had greater purpose and meaning. There's no doubt that humans today are no different from our early ancestors. We are drawn to good hero stories because they comfort us and heal us.

 Heroes nourish our connections with other people

Storytelling is a community-building activity. For early humans, just the act of gathering around communal fires to hear stories established social connections with others. This sense of family, group, or community was, and remains, central to human emotional well-being.

The content of hero stories also promotes a strong sense of social identity. If the hero is an effective one, he or she performs actions that exemplify and affirm the community's most cherished values. The validation of a shared worldview, told vividly in storytelling, cements social bonds. Heroes are role models who perform behaviors that reinforce our most treasured values and connections with others.

 Heroes show us how to transform our lives

Comparative mythologist Joseph Campbell believed that heroes undergo a personal transformation during their hero journeys. In every hero story, the hero starts out missing an important quality, usually self-confidence, humility, or a sense of his or her true purpose in life. To succeed, the hero must recover, or discover, this quality. Every hero story tells of a journey toward vast personal transformation.

Campbell (1988) believed that all of us undergo a hero-like journey throughout our ordinary human lifespans. During our lives "we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness. Only when we heroically risk change and growth in our own lives will we reach our full potential. As spiritual teacher Richard Rohr notes, hero stories inspire us all because they call us all.

 Heroes turn us into heroes ourselves

Good heroes use the power of transformation not only to change themselves for the better, but also to transform the world. In the classic hero journey, the newly transformed hero eventually transforms society in significant and positive ways.

Psychologist Eric Erikson's stages of human development suggest a similar hero trajectory for all of us. Adults grow in significant ways and then in mid-life reach a stage of generativity, which Erikson defines as the time when people give back to the society that has given them so much.

The emotion of elevation, which warms and uplifts us, also includes a desire to become a better person. According to Jonathan Haidt, elevation "motivates people to behave more virtuously themselves. The elevation we feel upon witnessing a heroic act transforms us into believing we are capable of heroic acts ourselves.

Conclusions

People need heroes because heroes save or improve lives and because heroes are inspiring. But we also need heroes for surprising reasons that go beyond the direct benefits of heroic action. Heroes elevate us emotionally; they heal our psychological ills; they build connections between people; they encourage us to transform ourselves for the better; and they call us to become heroes and help others.

In an earlier post, I discussed several ways that heroes make us smarter. In this post we've seen how heroes improve us emotionally and behaviorally as well. Spiritual gurus argue that hero stories also lift us spiritually. There seems to be no end to the ways in which heroes improve us individually, interpersonally, and societally


https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/why-we-need-heroes/201404/5-surprising-ways-heroes-improve-our-lives

 Regrets and my musings

Regret a feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over an occurrence or something that one has done or failed to do.

"The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd - The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world's existence. All these half-tones of the soul's consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.
Fernando Pessoa


Regrets,mistakes aside the ache and yearning comes from the constant questioning of what is right?what is wrong? Is this the right path?am i doing it right?

People and that includes peers,wise and unwise and a cartload of do-gooders and well wishers who will slap your back and say breathe,live and enjoy.

I try to do my best to lengthen my two soft pink flaps called lips into a semblance of a smile that hopefully conveys gratitude and a hint of thanks but seeing the horror and disgust in the person to who it is i am trying to convey,i realise that the smile did not reach my eyes and that my eyes instead conveyed to him,her or them to go ... themselves.

Sorry,for the disgust and revulsion stems and erupts without control for it is a reaction.A reaction,when i am told to bury my head in the ground,shut all my senses and cut out all questions and do what zombies do and run and chug along like a spoke in a wheel or if you allow me another nut in the machine.

I have lived with this soul called my wife and i have known her for 33 years and i just realised that i know very little of her and wait,please before you open your own flaps called lips and come with an automated response and that is " satish,there is something wrong with you( right you are for there is something wrong with me if you think asking and questioning is wrong) you don't love your wife enough( do you,do all of you do and for heaven' sake what is love) you should listen to your wife,really listen ( really,that is your comeback and that is the answer)

At the end and just before the titles begin to roll in the film spiderman ( hold on to your skirts and undies for i know that there are so many spiderman versions and so you will ask which) and i mean the first part that released in 2002 with tobey mcguire ( best version) and the hero recollects his uncles words " remember peter,with great power comes great responsibilities" and the words were so profound and so hard hitting and it took my rather naive and under developed brain to realise that those prophetic words were for super heroes and not for mere mortals like me and so i tried foolishly googling if those words had a reverse meaning ( meaning if great responsibilities come with great power) and i found none for the power comes first and then you learn to be responisble.W*F GOD.

But please hold on to your skirts and undies for a bit longer for the end is near and here.Many years later,not unlike Archimedes who ran out naked from his bath screaming Eureka after discovering a method to measure the volume of an irregularly shaped object,i too suddenly screamed and that was because the water was bloody cold and yet it cleared the cobwebs that fogged and clogged my brain and i understood that even me,a mere mortal,a weakling has to be responsible even with my limited powers.

Yes,with great powers such as the flaps called lips and with even greater power that is called the  mind, i have to be responsible when i talk,try to talk sense( usually nonsense) and generally when i flap my lips and realise that i have just misused my powers.

well,if all that flapping made sense to any one of you,then you will know that i aim to become more quiet,stop flapping my mouth and generally have a drugged look on my face and float on this voyage called life.

All this flapping reminds me of that great mind who flapped his thoughts and EUREKA came the most important commandments among the hundreds of others that he penned down.

Theeyinaal sutta punn Aarume
Aaraathe naavinaal sutta vadu.

Sorry,but i haveto,gotta translate

wounds created by fire will heal,But
wounds created by words will not heal and remain

Aiyo,appo ennatha mudivu.Enna koduma saravana.Enna mathiri manushanga eppadi thaan pozhaikarathu

                                        Randomly coherent

"A truly great book should be read in youth, again in maturity and once more in old age, as a fine building should be seen by morning light, at noon and by moonlight. Robertson Davies

Reading a book that you have already read a few times is a beautiful experience, a solitary one,a voyage with you holding hands with the author carrying on a conversation about why's,do's and dont's.It is much akin to making love to your lover again and again,wait no for that does get boring after a ...

But the book is a mystery filled with prose,thoughts,emotions,cravings,passions,secrets of dark nature and everytime you pick up the book it becomes a new experience and i go " wait a minute,those words do mean something else" and for me a single line of prose is enought to light my fires and shoot me of into dream realms and eyes wide open, i trance blank myself and like infinity,multiple arrivals to that particular moment begin to appear and i walk them all,the multitude of paths though the writer himself has taken the one,which is logical,practical and that which suits his mood and need the most.

Books are filled with prose and yet many are written so beautifully that they can be classified as poetry. Poetry,yes for if a beautiful woman can be classified as poetry when she walks,talks and laughs then why not a great book.For,when the beautiful woman rejects you,i promise the book will never unless you reject it.

Ayn Rand's fountainhead,J. R. R. Tolkien's The lord of the rings,John connolly's charlie parker series etc are a few books that i read a few times every year and i find that as i get older,the books seem to project a different meaning and thought.Early onset of dementia,i suppose or simply changing times and changing values.

Once a regular visitor to yeloor library,T.nagar,i soon tired of the travel and futile madman search for a parking spot and also the scary traffic restricting my plans to sunday and one day.So,back to Murugan library a n offshoot of the ancient beast Easwari lending library,lloyd road and i have to admit that they have kind of spruced up their space and the collections of books that occupy that space.

The only irritating thing about that library is it lies in the basement of gokul arcade,adyar and using your mobile is a bit of pain.But sweet charmer satish,flashes his molars and gets to use the library's landline phone to call home to talk to Big Momma and give her the choice that is spread all over the library.

But off late,the slight recoil of the staff has alerted me to the fact that my molars aside,i sneakingly think that they have been alerted to my Bi-polar affliction.

But poor me,judge me not too harshly for my bi-polar situation is all about " To be or not to be" and that my friends is a whole shitload of problems and afflictions.

                                  Redemption 227

Renuka ended the call and placing her mobile next to her,she looked at her dad Kandaswamy mudaliyar,who not getting any answer from her " Renuma,how is he? how bad is rudran hurt?"

Renu " he is hurt and that is all i know of at this moment dad.But now i know and all of us know that there is not going to be any wedding tomorrow morning for there are far more important matters to attend to.The only thing we can do right now is eat,sleep well and get up and fly out to delhi with our batteries fully charged."

Kandaswamy clasped his hands and renuka placing her hands on his and squeezing them softly " dad,this is rudran's life and since we are a part of his,it is our life too now."

Seeing the confusion on her dad's face,renu sadly " dad,i don't have answers to most of the questions that are in your eyes.But let me comfort you  and at least try to answer some of them with what little i know of who rudran is and from the line he descends from."

Kandaswamy mudaliyar " i know for sure that whatever you are about to tell me will only increase my confusion and muddle this whole matter even deeper."

Renu looked at him and for the first time,kandaswamy mudaliyar noticed a flicker in his daughters beautiful black eyes and wondering if what he was seeing was reflection of some light from somewhere,he rubbed his eyes and looked at renu again and the flicker began to blaze like flames and then renu took her dads right hand and placed it on her tummy where his grandson made his home and an electric shock like energy raced through him.

His mouth opened wide and his eyes opened wide in awe as he saw in his mind what his daughter and grand daughter wanted him to see and were revealing.

Thousands of men,armed deadly warriors were on their knees prostrating before a mighty warrior who stood facing the morning sun and next to him was a huge lion and then the man turned and kandaswamy mudaliyar recoiled in shock and fear for it was rudran himself and his eyes were blazing green.But behind Rudran stood another mighty warrior but it was as if he stood in the shadow that rudran cast and his eyes blazed orange and even though Kandaswamy mudaliyar was seeing this through his daughter and grandson,he saw,felt,and heard everything like it was happening in front of his eyes.

He stood alone, drenched in blood and although sweat poured down his wounded body,it just could not wash away the blood that welled up from the cuts and gashes in his body.The blood from his wounds mixed with the blood from his enemies that had splattered on him,when he had chopped their heads off and like many streams running down a hill they ran down and formed a puddle at his feet. He stared at the blood in amazement and wondered at the color for he could not differentiate between his blood and the blood of his enemies. But it was the pain that he felt deep inside his soul that hurt him the most and he knew that there would be no cure or balm for that pain and he also knew that there would be no end to all the killing which he would be doing. A gentle breeze lifted his long hair and they fluttered like flags behind him and he heard her whisper and her lullaby. He turned his face to the east  and heard his blind mother's soft voice singing for him  and he smiled gently as he felt better.

The thousands of warriors raised their hands and yelled loudly "Maasilan,Mamannan,kathiravan,azhagan,meykandan, engal kula deivam Kavin"


 I am fire and i am water. I am hell and i am heaven and i will bring peace to you.

  The boy who went into the dark and came back with light.