@sohni_kudi_111: thanks for reply. Exactly my point... that they took so much time to just come in terms of their own feelings and suddenly bringing physical intimacy and all that jazz would kill the essence. there will be no use of writing these 74 chapters. like you mentioned, everything happens at the right time. I was a little upset to see such impatience that i had to ask you guys this.
@kansya: thank you darling for understanding. it feels good when people relate to you and understand your pov. thanks a ton.
@PEARLPOO: thanks poo. it really uplifted my spirits.
@pallavimn: hi dear, thanks for all your support. feel free to express yourself. all i wanted to do was to make you guys understand that there will be romance and a lot of it. but just that give me and the characters to develop to that point.
@payal.gupta177: thanks dear... and some day this story has to end no?
@sillyseema: hey, kuch zyada nahi hua yaar. yes, as you mentioned, love, lust and intimacy are not bad things but then it depends on person to person how they want to experience. some people want to experience those very quickly in their relationships and few others want to explore those sides slowly and gradually with time. and haven't you heard of that phrase- sabar ka phal meetha hota hain? (or i'd rather say 'hot' hota hain)
@PaintedSky: hi... yep. not rushing. you made me smile.
@madhubala123: officially, welcome aboard. About the letter and what you expect out of Maan, I will keep my mouth shut and give you the benefit of doubt.
@idunno: "it is silence.." I loved it so much thanks a ton
@indiegirl: you have invested so much into the prologue. But I am hoping against all hopes that I surprise you.
@TaranaGeet: I hope whatever troubles you, vanishes asap like magic! lappy baby is 6 years old... and for the first time, it has shown signs of old age.
@primafacie: hi, thanks for the lovely note. I asked the question not because I want to change anything between the two but for the impatience that I see every now and then. TBH, i am not averse to physical intimacy (if that is what you think) or the kind that you talked about (real kiss you say) but what I want is time. they will have their moments when they are ready for it, when the words truly fail, when there is nothing that could express what they feel. But impatience does no good, does it? I want to develop that trust and love gradually, till they reach a point of no return. they have now what...not even made it official. how can I jump into things like these?
@tabby999: confusing you say? Isn't it so me?
@taahir004: thank you so much for being here. yes, he could have given into his feelings that night too... but he is what he is. Like you said, right things will happen at the right time.
75.Abhi Na Jao Chod Kar Ke Dil Abhi Bhara Nahin...
"Hmmm...abhi na jao chod kar ke dil abhi bhara nahin..."
hummed the tune that stuck to her head all through her journey from
London to NYC as she ran her finger along the spine of the books that he
had kept so carefully.
song recently had made it to the top of her playlist. The study gave
her this warm fuzzy feeling inside her stomach despite being chattering
cold in the winter. The cold fireplace told her of his condition. He
indeed hadn't been in the study for a while. She picked up a random book
and swayed her way towards the bay window and pushed it open. The cold
rushed in like she had been waiting for this exact moment.
"hawa zara mehek tho le... nazar zara behek tho le..."
shivered with the cold and quickly closed the window, pulling her shawl
closer to herself. her teeth chattered that made her stop singing. She
had woken up in the middle of the night, thanks to her body which was
accustomed to London timings and had wandered off to the study. Maan
wasn't back perhaps. He had been wrapping up work before Christmas and
that kept him busy. That was what Kabir had said. She tried to stay
awake but jet lag had its way with her. post dinner, when she had rested
on the bed, she had fallen asleep in an instant, like magic!
Kanha, is he back? Is he working in his room?
She had been so excited to see him all this while and her Kanha was prolonging this wait even more.
was tempted to go to his room and check on him but it was way into the
night and hence decided against the idea. She fell back on dadima's
rocking chair and with a push of her feet, she swayed, opening the book,
trying to read.
Back and forth...Back and forth...
chair swayed gently and the silence made her drowsy again. Within
moments, the book fell on her chest and her eyes closed on their own.
watched her sleep on the rocking chair that now rocked slowly and
controlled, slowly coming to a halt and blinked his eyes a couple of
She didn't vanish.
shawl remained loosely wrapped around her shoulder and a book rested on
her chest, that moved up and down slowly, giving away her breathing
patterns. He was definitely hallucinating. He had walked in to keep
away some papers before he called it day and his eyes had fallen on the
sleeping beauty. he had come home late and knew that everyone must have
gone to sleep as usual. The house gave a different aura; he had found
when he had entered. Something was off; something was new. But maybe it
was Christmas the next day. May be his mom had planned some dinner the
next day. And he had stopped thinking up until this moment.
shook his head and kept the papers back on his table, chiding himself
mentally to have been behaving stupid. He turned to leave and she was
still very much there.
"You need to sleep..." he cursed himself mentally for behaving like a teenager and walked past her.
sneezed faintly in her sleep and he stopped. Turning back, he saw her
turning uncomfortably in her sleep. He left an inaudible gasp and stood
stunned. Was she really there? Or was she just a figment of his
imagination? He couldn't for the love of God understand the kind of
tricks in mind played with him.
How could she be here at this time?
His sanity asked him.
See it for yourself...
His heart answered.
slowly made his way towards the chair and bend over her, holding the
chair by its arms to stop swaying. She was breathing oh so softly, like
she was seeing a happy dream. With a thudding heart, he raised his hand
and gently pushed away that strand of hair from her cheeks and froze
right there. His hand still in air, he forgot to breathe. It was as if
someone had stopped the flow of time right at that moment, like how a
camera captures a memory. Time captured it too.
She was real!
blinked a couple of times to make himself believe that. she was very
much real and she was in his study, sleeping in his chair, breathing and
alive. She wasn't his imagination.
and surprise made him tremble with so much happiness that he shivered
and knelt in front of her. His hand, in the process might have brushed
her cheeks again that made her come alive from her tiny nap. She arose
like a sun and stopped blinking her eyes when they fell on him, kneeling
right in front of her, dazed still, watching her intently, like he was
seeing her for the first time.
"Maan..." she gasped, not believing that he was really here. she had not expected to see him before morning. but he was here.
His sharp intake of breath told her of his predicament. He did not believe that she was here.
"Maan..." she called out lovingly, leaning closer to him.
Tell me this is no dream...
prayed under his breath and she came to him like an answer. She leaned
closer and cupped his cheeks, her eyes, he saw now, glistened with tears
in the dim lights.
then she slipped into his arms like beads of pearls slipping into the
thread, wrapping themselves around it to make their existence potent.
are really here..." he whispered into her hair, slipping his hands
around her, pulling her close. His happiness knew no bounds. She was
indeed here. she was back. his Geet was back.
His little storm...
heart warmed up, holding that petite little lady in his arms, pressing
her close to himself, making himself believe that she was as real as his
Ohh how he had lived his days without even a trace of her...
dipped his head into her shoulder, taking in her scent, that mild
fragrance that she always exuded; that always soothed him, almost to the
realms of sleep.
she murmured, feeling something she couldn't explain. She knew she had
been excited to meet him but she never knew she would feel something
like this. something like "belongingness". Something like the "feeling
of home". Something like "peace".
was only but a few seconds when she felt it. The difference in him that
had always worried her. They had hugged...no no, she had hugged him
countless number of times but never had she felt then what she felt now.
This was different.
This wasn't the kind of hug wherein he cocooned her in his embrace.
wasn't wrapped around by his warm embrace. It was the other way round.
He buried himself in her, seeking the kind of warmth that he had always
given her. She almost wept with the knowledge dawning upon her as she
slowly wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight.
He needed her...
He had always needed her...
she had been so stupid to have not felt that before. He sought her. She
bit her lips to muffle that cry and wrapped her arms around him,
pulling him close in her small embrace.
Oh dear love, what did you make me do?
breath fanned her neck, setting her skin in goose-pimples. And suddenly
she realized she was no longer sitting on the chair. She had slipped
down unto the rug, kneeling in front of him, holding him in her arms,
gently caressing his head.
gasped all of a sudden, feeling his arms wrap tighter around her and
she let a drop of tear slip down her eyes as Pooja's words floated in
He is yours and only yours. Understand that fact and you don't have to hide yourself in front of him.
Was he really hers?
hands grazed his broad shoulders meekly as she replayed her words. She
knew Maan loved her but to be sitting here, holding him like this, to
know his need of her, to understand his love... It was something she
hadn't prepared herself for. It was overwhelming.
She was needed...
He needed her!!!
thought itself was so powerful that she could help but press a soft
kiss on his shoulder, so soft that he didn't even realize.
felt eons that they remained so, letting their heartbeats calm down and
come in sync like two pendulums swinging in resonance after a chaotic
heard his sharp intake of breath and parted from him to look into his
eyes. He pressed his forehead against her instead, letting his breath
fall on her lips, making her quiver.
"Lavender??? That's new!" he spoke over her lips, smiling softly.
"Huh?" she flicked her eyes open and at him.
He parted and looked at her playfully, "nothing."
She didn't understand what he said but she could see his eyes twinkle in
He held both her hands in his and pressed a kiss on her knuckles, "when did you come?"
Her heart skipped beats as she grabbed his hands tightly, not knowing how to react to that kiss and not wanting to pull away.
this afternoon." She leaned back and sat down on the rug, crossing her
legs and he did the same too, not letting go of her hands.
"why didn't you tell me?" his eyes rife in amusement.
She smiled and whispered, "Surprise!"
watched his eyes go wide in surprise and happiness and he probably
wanted to say something because he opened his mouth but then he didn't.
"what?" she asked, cocking her head to her side.
He shook his head, smiling and leaned closer and pressed a longing kiss on her forehead, "I am just so glad that you are here."
She blinked in awe as he parted and revelled in the chaste kiss that sent tingling sensations down her spine.
It had been so long...
getting colder..." his eyes went to the closed bay window and then
remained at her. Despite the shawl, she was unconsciously rubbing her
arms to generate more heat.
she could say anything, he walked to the fireplace to bring alive the
heart of the fire and she just sat there, watching him work his way
around. The study held so many memories of him and her...the place where
he was himself; the place where he had confessed his love for her. she
sighed and hid her face between her palms.
crackling of the embers made her look up and found him stand by the
fireplace, half illuminated by the fire and half by the dim lights of
sense of deja vu hit her and she suddenly felt so weak in the face of
time as fleeting moments of past flooded her head. She wanted to stand
up and walk up to him and tell him so many things but then stopped short
when she saw him walking towards her and sitting on the floor, right
"Now, tell me everything." he urged.
She looked at him confused, "about what?"
"everything about London...everything about you!"
Her smile widened and simultaneously, her heart thudded.
Everything about her...
dear Kanha, why does he hold so much influence on me? she sighed and
kept looking into his eyes, awed and happy to see him happy. His
happiness twinkled in his eyes which she felt in her too. she had not
expected that happiness.
Someone could be happy because of her too!!
"hey" he stretched and pulled her back from her reverie, "I'm waiting."
blinked a couple of times not knowing how to start, where to start and
probably he had guessed her confusion too for he went ahead and offered
her the respite, "How is Pooja doing?"
It was like he had keyed her and she went off like a hot water geyser springing off the ground.
tell me about her...she has been throwing tantrums like a kid. To be
honest, she just makes me lose y patience. I want this...I want that... I
want to eat mangoes...I feel like crying for nothing, ugh...
He smiled softly at her, watching her blabber. She was so real, so vibrant, so innocent.
"And you know the other day I baked a chocolate cake for her on her demand and then madam says..."
supported himself on the floor with one hand pressed to the ground and
the other hand rested on the knee of his folded leg and kept watching
her. the way her lips moved as she talked of how Pooja got on her nerves
or how her colleagues played pranks on each other. He watched her eyes
twinkle in delight, her lashes sweeping those beautiful orbs moment by
moment; her little nose scrunching up when she spoke of something not
very nice. He watched her lips curve with what words only God knew she
spoke. He watched her hands move animatedly in the air, making patterns
he couldn't decipher, her breathing quick and shallow, her head bobbing
and nodding as she played theatrics and all he could do was just watch
If only he could stop time for a moment and capture every bit of her existence in his heart and soul...
it took me three whole days to convince Pooja that the girl was just
Raj's colleague and that there was nothing wrong with just a silly hug.
And I tell you Maan..."
looked at him and stopped, seeing that look in his eyes. He didn't even
blink. She saw him so lost in something and she wasn't that foolish
anymore to not realize what "something" had taken away his attention.
of red crept her cheeks as her lashes dropped, unable to meet those
love filled eyes that spoke nothing but of sheer happiness.
"Maan." She whispered out softly, unable to bear that gaze.
sighed, letting one of his hands rise and sweep away that strand of
hair grazing her cheek, "Go on. Tell me more little storm..."
swore he hadn't heard a single word she had been speaking till now but
he just didn't want her to stop. He wanted her to just go on. He didn't
want this moment to pass, not when she was back. not when she was this
happy. Not when he was this delighted. His aching heart suddenly called
truce on his sanity. And all it needed was just her mere presence.
He let his finger graze her cheek a bit longer, convincing himself more that this was real.
She shivered in the feel. Countless number of times had he done that but what was it now that made all the difference?
"I...uhh..I just.." she felt so conscious with his gaze that it made him laugh. And he did.
chuckled and laced his fingers with her and brought it close to his
mouth and pressed a soft kiss on the back of her palm, "I am sorry but I
am just so happy to see you here."
words sunk deep into her, more than his touch and that was then she
realized how much he had missed her. It wasn't only her... he had been
standing at the same pedestal as her too.
When she didn't reply, he leaned closer and tickled her forehead, like he always did, making her giggle.
He loved seeing her lips widen into a smile, "tell me more. How about your Boss?"
She twisted her lips, "Ugh don't talk about him."
He raised a brow, "is he that bad?"
She cocked her head to the side, "Of course. Didn't you say it yourself that bosses are never nice?"
was then her eyes fell on their entwined hands and how softly yet
visibly he had clasped her nimble fingers. His laughter made her look up
at him and couldn't help sighing. Her most favourite thing in the
Oh stupid Geet, how can you ever forget this?
She chided herself and revelled in the aesthetic of this moment.
"Of course they have to be "not nice" to get people to work perfectly."
do you agree that you are a slave driver?" she spoke suddenly being
reminded of the days she had worked with him on the 10th floor.
laughter ceased and she felt his thumb tracing unknown patterns on her
palm. So spontaneous it was and so soft that gave away nothing but how
much he had longed for her.
"they are entirely two different things Geet." He couldn't believe how she was relating things.
then please elaborate what you meant by the phrase "not nice"? Doesn't
making people work till they die come under this category?" she made a
He watched her amused and happy and bewildered all at the same time.
"So do you imply that you didn't enjoy working with me?"
fingers kept making soft patterns on her palms, sending soothing
tingles up and down her body. She exhaled and nodded vigorously like a
little child, "Ah han. It was gruelling. I was almost dead by the end of
He scoffed, "that's because you were inefficient."
"excuse me?" she snapped.
Did he just say that?
He shrugged, "You know it better."
"I... I wasn't inefficient. I just didn't know how to work around but then of course I learned with time."
still you made rookie mistakes. Admit it. You sucked and you probably
still do! And that is why your boss keeps shouting at you."
She fumed. How dare he?
watched her face turn red and he had every intention of going ahead and
pulling her cheeks but he held back. She was a wounded tigress now.
"You are so mean. Here I come back after so long and look at you...you monster..."
He just couldn't have enough of her.
"What will it take you to admit your fault Geet?" he asked with utmost seriousness.
She pulled her hand away from him, cringing at the loss of the soothing tingles but she held her stand and stood up.
what does it take you to be a little polite to the woman who travelled
so far just to surprise you? How ungrateful. I am leaving. Bye."
She stood up to leave when he burst out laughing and pulled her hand back.
"Hey Geet stop..."
His sudden pull made her lose her balance and she fell right on him, taking him on the floor.
"Ahhh...you freak..." she screamed.
wanted to scream at him for teasing her so bad but then his laughter
froze her. that was when she realized he was lying on the floor and she
rested on him, his hands wrapped around her protectively. His body
vibrated with that laughter and suddenly she just forgot everything. the
sound reverberated in the silent room, occasionally being interrupted
by the crackling fire and she couldn't help watching his face...so
happy, so content with just having her around.
body shook with laughter and she found herself leaning down and resting
her head on his chest, feeling the happy vibrations in her body too;
hearing this steady and fast heart beats in her ears too.
Monster Khurana is stupid...
She mumbled in her head and smiled.
sighed and held him, until she couldn't hear his laughter anymore. She
could feel his long deep breaths now, slow and rhythmic. She raised her
head and found him looking at her.
"I love your laughter." She confessed for the first time, making him swoon with just that.
She slipped down and rested her head on his stomach, stretching her legs away from him, making a "T'.
still held her hand, quiet now, tracing the lines of her palms, trying
to figure out the way to happiness. The room remained silent and the
"Geet?" he spoke after a long time.
"Umm?" she kept looking at the ceiling, still trying to gauze what he was writing on her palms with his fingers.
"How long are you here?"
She felt her head bob with his stomach, going up and down with each of his breath. She could feel each of his breaths...
"Till 2nd of Janurary."
was all what he said. He never asked anything to her; not even if she
ever planned to come back to him or if she planned to stay back in
They remained still in time for some time when something struck her head. She turned her head to ask him what went in her head.
"Say Maan, what..."
She stopped, watching him sleep, breathing slow and deep, her hand still laced with his, now rested on the rug.
had been exhausted, she realized. He had been working so much and yet
he had the patience to sit with her. he always did this. to say she was
overwhelmed was just an understatement.
one hand rested below his head for support and the other just held
hers, soft yet firmly. Care and concern beckoned her to wake him up and
send him back to his room for a proper night's rest for he desperately
needed it. But she let her heart waver today. She let herself be a
little selfish and closed her eyes, still resting her head on him.
She didn't want him to go.
clasped his fingers tightly and let the events of the evening seep into
her soul bit by bit. And amidst all that, two things now remained in
her head. The presence of Maan right beside her because of her selfish
little act and the lines of the song that had stuck in her head all this
Bas ab na mujhko tokna... Na badh ke raah rokna Agar mein ruk gayi abhi Toh Ja na Paungi Kabhi...