@Fary: the VM is all kinds of adorbs!! Fav bit is probably the chawl too... love the song.. I don't remember if I have heard this before though...
I was all smiles throughout... very very sweeet..
Anyway, since I haven't really written too much about the monologue... I actually wanted to write a small something about it!
So here goes nothing:
Of love, vulnerabilities and expressions!
"Raita Phail Gaya"
Quick learner, confrontation-ist, naive... Khidkitod Annika was the first one to accept that this... this unexplainable magnetic sort of emotions/ thread that continued to tie them together was love.
But love is such a paradox in itself that it both weakens and strengthens us at the same time. So while it was obviously Annika who accepted to herself about falling in love with her baggad billa... it is not really surprising that it's been Shivaay who has been fighting with those feelings LONG before Annika even started to think along those lines.
"Annika ki baat alag hai..."
"Jo Annika ke sath hota hai...woh...dusron ke sath nahi hota"
"Mere hote huye.. aise kaise jaan chali jaayegi.."
Her name was always a revered whisper. The closest desire that he kept hidden from the world. Probably hidden even from his own conscious self. Sort of as if she were a forbidden desire that weakened him right at the core.
She was beautiful. Not just outwardly... but also her selfless innocence that thought about others long before it thought about herself.
"Kaise pyaar nahi hota Annika?"
Being the ultimate protector... the foundation of the Oberoi family... SSO had no space for love for all the right reasons. Being in love meant exposing his heart to the world... a world that was constantly looking to target his family.
So he tried. Futile, yet persistent trials to keep himself and his family safe from his own vulnerability.
Trying to break her, he battled with himself as he felt the power of his own blows as if stricken on his own flesh.
"Tooth tum rahi thi...par bikhar mein raha tha"
In a sense, all his efforts were also to selfishly keep her safe... because he had always known one thing.. she was too good for him.
"Tum itni acchi mat bano Annika... kyunki mein itna acha nahi hoon.."
But the vulnerability grew everyday. Every time his eyes met her dark chocolate eyes... he knew that he lost a little of himself to her.
He inflicted pain on both her and him as a result of these growing vulnerabilities... but he was losing. The first time for him... the first for her.
And through those trails, he stumbled through the way as he realised just how much the vulnerability effected them both and everyone around them.
Jealousy, hatred... extremity of every kind circled in a fire around him as he fought with love. To ultimately coming down to his knees in front of her... for her.
And he didn't do it because he thought she was some ethereal goddess or the ultimate perfection.
Because really, love isn't about revering the other person to some god-like position.. it's about revering that overwhelming feelings that are brought about by that person.
"Annika mera guroor hai..."
He might speak that aloud, but there is more there. And anyone let alone Pinky... who doesn't hear the unsaid is deaf. Because when love like theirs has been tested... it personifies into an overwhelming flood of emotions... that just cannot be expressed in mere words.
The words make his eyes shine just a little more. Saying her name out around doesn't send him into a tizzy... that's all fluff writing... her name makes him happy.
Not the happy that he has felt with his family... but 'complete' in happy.
The unsaid words are whispered in the caresses between two souls... "Tu hai mere jeene ki wajah..."
For you, BW!! I wish I had more time... I would love to edit and rewrite some parts I know.. but too much chores lined up for Sunday!