Today the whole episode was about marriage. On one side Sage Parashuram told Shiv Dhanush will be the means by which Sita will get her worthy partner, someone her equal.
On other hand we saw Kaikeyi Dasrath marriage breaking down. Reason for Kaikeyi the marriage was for love. She thought Dasrath loved her enough. But for Dasrath his second and third marriage was to get a heir. Dasrath says she didn't provide him heir and it was after Putrakamesthi Yajna their sons were born. And Kaikeyi asks another valid question. Is bearing a child a woman's only responsibility. And this war of words made me look into the concept of marriage itself. How it becomes successful or a failure. What is its foundation
An ideal marriage is the one in which a man and a woman shares values, deeply love each other and want to unite in body, mind and soul. And when a society blesses such a union the right foundation of marriage happens. The ritual is for showing the society that from today these two people are man and wife. Just because the ritual happen they don't become man and wife if acceptance is not there from the mind. Children are a byproduct of such a union. But if you are marrying just to get an offspring the foundation of the marriage is concentrating on results than the action. And BG always tells concentrate on action, not on result. When you focus on results you are sure going to do a wrong action as happened in Dasrath's case. He was desperate for a son. So to get a second wife he had to give vachan that her son will occupy the throne of Ayodhya if he is the eldest.
And now comes the second part. Secret in marriage. Why this became a problem. There are many marriages that happening as deals even today in many political and business families. But if both the partners concerned enter the marital bond knowing the details of the deal, over time they might work together to make the marriage based on love, trust and understanding and bring it to right foundation. Many such marriage succeeds also. That's because both partner know the deal. But what when one partner is denied the truth. Here not only Dasrath committed the mistake of not telling her, but her father and brother also didn't find it important to tell her the basis on which marriage is happening. All 3 are equally responsible for the illusion Kaikeyi believed in. But yes as husband Dasrath should have told her upfront. But coming it now, Dasrath disagreeing, using harsh words Kaikeyi is hurt. And she is angry. Truth has to be told at right time. Else truth becomes the big problem. And secrets between husband-wife can always ruin the marriage.
Now last thing. Is woman only responsible for child. Even today society questions woman only for childlessness. Only she is called incomplete without a child. While creation process involves both man and woman. Actually man is the initiator, woman is only the carrier. Still the stigma is always suffered by woman. And everytime this one aspect is held against her irrespective of all other achievements. Also time society need to ponder does a woman becomes a mother only if she gives birth. Then how come Yasodha became Krishna's mother and Sunaina became Sita's mother. And why do we call Mother Thereasa or Mata Amritandamayi. These woman never married and have no biological children. Woman encompass the divine love or maternity feeling. Yes it becomes evident when you give birth. But even without giving birth every woman is blessed with that instinct and when she showers her maternal love across, protecting she does become mother even without giving birth.
And Janak says he doesn't want to go against nature. What did Dasrath get going against nature. By doing Putramesthi Yajna. With Shanta's sacrifice. The 4 sons became the point of contention on the throne. If only Shanta was there, would there have been disharmony in his family to this extend. Because the question of son doesn't occur at all. We have to ponder.
Shiv Shakti
