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blue5sky

@blue5sky

Goldie

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: Nisha0604

Oh! No Asma

I am very sorry

I didnt mean to offend you at all or him

I just meant to say, you were so innocent and young how did you have such maturity to take his words in the right way

Thats amazing👏

Please don't say that..

No offence taken because I did not think you that even crossed your mind.

And thanks for calling me mature ...I love it when people call me that..i usually only hear impulsive and moody 😉.

Aadmi accha tha ( my mentor yes took a while to see his goodness) and we all seen our dad's work through their cadres with only transfers and gheraos for rewards. So i did not think it was unusual.

Update eppo...Waiting for RnB 😳

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Kjolovesbabies

@Kjolovesbabies

Goldie

Posted: 8 years ago

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/topic/4519850

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Prakrithy

@Arya1991

Senior Member

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#TheFeminist v/s #R&BFanGirl - An Eternal Battle, on "A bit."

This one's for Namu.

Because nothing is defined clearly in blacks and whites, everything falls into varying shades of vague grays.

Because you don't have to be one OR the other.

Because being a woman is about being contrary - Feminist & FanGirl, Spoilt & Disciplinarian, Author & Critic...

Because YOU can be both and rock it.

Because. Just because.

1. II's intimate knowledge of Abhi's food preferences, and pestering him about it. While ignoring R&B.

(FanGirl: How dare you?! So much attitude? You've never done any of this for your own hubs!! Whatever happened to being #GoodIyerWife, huh? If he was mine, I'd wait hand and foot on him. Humph. You don't deserve such a Moorti of Mardaangi*, like R&B. #IfOnly #WishHeWasMine 😕

Feminist: Oi! Whatever happened to #AthitiDevoBhava?! Guests are god. And, to be treated as such as long as they're in your home. Being #SatiSavitri comes only after that, and is entirely optional too. Besides, even if she did mollycoddle and pester R&B about his food, he'd not appreciate it. He'd just be silent about it. #AttentionSeeking #UselessMelodrama 🥱)

2. "What happened to becoming a CFO, Plant Controller, Finance Director etc di?" Abhishek mocked.

(FanGirl: Aye! HOW dare you? You think her sasuraal won't support her? That her hubs (#TheDude) will tie her down at home to take care of the babies? Humph. He's not you. Or a neanderthal. Yenna nee nenaichee?** Her hubs is a filthy rich man, who'll get help to take care of the babies, and work from home himself. #TheCompleteMan #HotDaddyR&B #RandomIdiotIyer 😡

Feminist: ::growls angrily at Abhishek:: You completely, idiotic, imbecile pig!#StupidIyerNeanderthal, would you ask the same question of a man with impending fatherhood? How dare you compare a woman's emotional and mental capabilities to handle work, family and life with that of you silly, simple-minded men? 😡

Me: ::glares daggers at Abhishek:: If you weren't a fictional character, I'd have skewed you onto a spike and grilled you slowly over an open flame. While you were still fully conscious. You bloody, chauvinistic arsehole. #StupidIyerNeanderthal 😡)

3. Ranjan and II's bond.

(Ranjan's immediate answer to #StupidIyerNeanderthal's imbecilic question was adequate proof, to all parties present, of his unquestionable, unequivocal support of his daughter(-in-law) and his faith in her abilities. Not just him, I'd say he spoke for the Bhallas.

#TeamRanjan #GottaLoveBhallas

Actually, their bond has been displayed for quite a while now. Ranjan loves his gudiya as much as his own daughters, possibly even more.

II has been serving as a rickety footbridge, slowly bridging the distance between the estranged father-son duo. In her insanity, her antics, her Iyer pride and her reluctance to claim anything as hers, she has given them a lot to bond over. Their love for her, and her future miniatures, will serve to connect them, in a way they haven't connected since Savvy's death.)

4. R&B's silence, his caveman thoughts and breaking his silence with "A bit."

(FanGirl: Ayyooo! AIIYYYOOO!! Semma cute di ivan! Yenakku venam!!^ Him sniffing her and getting aroused. And wanting to do indecent things to her 😳 Give him to me! I'd even let him carry me off, caveman style, while I'm in the middle of a conversation!! #CavemanR&B #BeMine #IfOnly

Feminist: Oi! Why does everything link back to sex in your stupid head, huh?#CavemanDude Ugh. Fine. I agree it's kind of a natural consequence of seeing your mate carrying your child. But, at least be respectful about it! Tossing her over a shoulder, it seems. Idiot. #NeanderthalR&B 😵

Me: ::swoons:: #HotDaddyR&B #WantMyR&B )

#Arya

Translations:

* Idol of Manliness

** What did you think?!

^ So cute he is! I want him!!

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Srividya

@moonwearer

IF-Rockerz

+ 3

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: blue5sky
I don't know if my mentor is turning in his abode 😕.
Well I'm not sure what it sounded like to you guys...i only took as him trying to tell me to stay balanced and away from over estimating myself. In the place we worked motivation, personal strength and bonding was the norm.

I agree with you too emotions and passion are what helps create and stay together.
Work can and usually does consume you. And that 's what makes us what we are!😊

Asma definitely your mentor had his reasons for saying that. I dont know whether what i wrote sounded audacious...the ideas we exchange many times help clarify perspectives...the reason i ordered the book is to see what i need to understand about my belief.

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blue5sky

@blue5sky

Goldie

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: moonwearer

Asma definitely your mentor had his reasons for saying that. I dont know whether what i wrote sounded audacious...the ideas we exchange many times help clarify perspectives...the reason i ordered the book is to see what i need to understand about my belief.

Hummm.. to say and be understood and cared about...cant ask form more can I.

Im glad you got the book. It's something that came out over a decade ago. But kinda holds true..

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Vibhuti

@SparkleV

IF-Rockerz

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

Hey,

A Person standing outside our house, somehow getting uncomfortable or awkward, having numerous pre conceived notions about us, asking for entry. What we'll do? kick him from our door?

This is what i felt in this thread.

I knw i knw no one cares about what i felt and it should be like that only.

its just i couldnt take it, since morning its troubling me therefore letting it out.

You may think am making a mountain out of a molehill...You can and you must.

May be I'll get few not so pleasant answers or replies just like the new one got...but i'll be alright since you all are like a family! a virtual one!

So what i am saying, even i had received 3 PMs regarding MISUNDERSTANDINGS while judging the author.

Well who needs to be judged!

Sosy and Nisha both are blessed.. her Writings show what kind of a person she is 👏 and this is coming out of a proud member and reader.

but cant we tackle/reply/answer in a better way possible..believing the person is genuinely confused about us.

her' next posts clearly depicted she doesnt meant to hurt anyone or insult anyone.

It means we are not letting new people in?

i felt so. Am here since 9th thread, now i find atmosphere quite different, pls dont suggest to leave, i cant😳

SoSy is the most most most beautiful tale ever! I can and i will say that in my 70s too😛 and So is Nisha!

I just couldnt take that sarcastic replies and teaming up against one new entry!

but yes, anyone doesnt owes me any kind of explanation, its me who is at fault, you can blame this on my age, immaturity? or am naive? anything.

but whole this matter was itching me since morning.

I would be okay if i could share this and get myself taught by any fellow member, even messaged ashu but she is busy

nevermind, maine bol diya hai, you can throw ande tamatar decorated with lovely words. 😆

never meant to hurt anyone, i actually cant think to do so, believe or not :)

Edited by SparkleV - 8 years ago

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Prakrithy

@Arya1991

Senior Member

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: SparkleV
Hey,
A Person standing outside our house, somehow getting uncomfortable or awkward, having numerous pre conceived notions about us, asking for entry. What we'll do? kick him from our door?
This is what i felt in this thread.
I knw i knw no one cares about what i felt and it should be like that only.
its just i couldnt take it, since morning its troubling me therefore letting it out.
You may think am making a mountain out of a molehill...You can and you must.
May be I'll get few not so pleasant answers or replies just like the new one got...but i'll be alright since you all are like a family! a virtual one!

So what i am saying, even i had received 3 PMs regarding MISUNDERSTANDINGS while judging the author.
Well who needs to be judged!
Sosy and Nisha both are blessed.. her Writings show what kind of a person she is 👏 and this is coming out of a proud member and reader.
but cant we tackle/reply/answer in a better way possible..believing the person is genuinely confused about us.
her' next posts clearly depicted she doesnt meant to hurt anyone or insult anyone.
It means we are not letting new people in?
i felt so. Am here since 9th thread, now i find atmosphere quite different, pls dont suggest to leave, i cant😳

SoSy is the most most most beautiful tale ever! I can and i will say that in my 70s too😛 and So is Nisha!
I just couldnt take that sarcastic replies and teaming up against one new entry!
but yes, anyone doesnt owes me any kind of explanation, its me who is at fault, you can blame this on my age, immaturity? or am naive? anything.
but whole this matter was itching me since morning.
I would be okay if i could share this and get myself taught by any fellow member, even messaged ashu but she is busy
nevermind, maine bol diya hai, you can throw ande tamatar decorated with lovely words. 😆
never meant to hurt anyone, i actually cant think to do so, believe or not :)

Hey SparkleV,

I'm going to be very honest here. I'm sure I'll have a lot of people upset with me due to the same, but we all get over it eventually.

I agree whole-heartedly with you.

The thing is... This is a free-for-all forum. Everyone can come in here, read and comment on these threads. There might be days that these people love us. And, there might be days that they absolutely hate us.

Everyone here is free to state their opinion (the newbie who criticised Nisha, and all those who bashed her in defense of Nisha).

What I'm saying now, is purely my earlier experiences, my personal opinion, and how I chose to deal with it.

I was an active member of the Software Symphonies gang, right from Thread 1.

Somethings similar have happened a few times earlier as well. When someone expressed displeasure with anything here, they'd be bashed, irrespective of what they were talking of. Sometimes it was because of misunderstandings, sometimes due to not having views similar to most of us here. Whatever the cause, most of these people never come back here (actively. They might become silent readers.).

Just because they express a bias against us...

Does it mean that we treat these people with the same bias that they treat us?

I wouldn't. Because it makes us just as biased as them.

Wouldn't it be better for everyone involved to just agree to disagree and move on?

I mean... All of us argue with friends and family - on all sorts of things. Sometimes we find a way to compromise, sometimes that doesn't work. Does that mean that we won't hear the person out? Or that we won't agree with anything else that person says either? Or that we exchange harsh words that probably alienate them forever?

Words have a lot of power. They can make and break people.

All I'm saying is...

Maybe we need to consider our words (its implications and possible consequences) before putting them across to others. If we claim to be "tolerant", we need to hear them out, irrespective of how much we disagree with them. Maybe even ignore that particular point of contention for the time being, and prove them wrong over time with our actions.

Edited by Arya1991 - 8 years ago

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Vibhuti

@SparkleV

IF-Rockerz

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: Arya1991

Hey SparkleV,

I'm going to be very honest here. I'm sure I'll have a lot of people upset with me due to the same, but we all get over it eventually.

this reason took hours of my day whether to write or not.

I agree whole-heartedly with you.

thankyou very much. seriously. thanks!

The thing is... This is a free-for-all forum. Everyone can come in here, read and comment on these threads. There might be days that these people love us. And, there might be days that they absolutely hate us.
Everyone here is free to state their opinion (the newbie who criticised Nisha, and all those who bashed her in defense of Nisha).

What I'm saying now, is purely my earlier experiences, my personal opinion, and how I chose to deal with it.

I was an active member of the Software Symphonies gang, right from Thread 1.
Somethings similar have happened a few times earlier as well. When someone expressed displeasure with anything here, they'd be bashed, irrespective of what they were talking of. Sometimes it was because of misunderstandings, sometimes due to not having views similar to most of us here. Whatever the cause, most of these people never come back here (actively. They might become silent readers.).

Just because they express a bias against us...
Does it mean that we treat these people with the same bias that they treat us?

exactly, being rude to rude (whom we felt that such person was rude while conveying) is not the only solution.

I wouldn't. Because it makes us just as biased as them.
Wouldn't it be better for everyone involved to just agree to disagree and move on?

I mean... All of us argue with friends and family - on all sorts of things. Sometimes we find a way to compromise, sometimes that doesn't work. Does that mean that we won't hear the person out? Or that we won't agree with anything else that person says either? Or that we exchange harsh words that probably alienate them forever?

agreeing again.

Words have a lot of power. They can make and break people.

They break the most, since everyone cant take rudeness to sleep. I cant

All I'm saying is...
Maybe we need to consider our words (its implications and possible consequences) before putting them across to others. If we claim to be "tolerant", we need to hear them out, irrespective of how much we disagree with them. Maybe even ignore that particular point of contention for the time being, and prove them wrong over time with our actions.

Thankyou for the much needed reply!

I appreciate your honesty 😊 it was a puddle not everyone would love to step in.

Am Vibhuti :)

Politeness is all am asking for, but it doesnt mean anyone will come up and blabber any damn thing about the author or members, No one can mess with our author neither anyone can bring up any kind of deficiency in the tale!

i have sent my apologies to 'her' since it was required by me to calm myself.

thanks again😳

am actually feeling 'good'!

Edited by SparkleV - 8 years ago

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dristi64

@dristi64

Goldie

Posted: 8 years ago

VIBHU, ARYA

Nobody is keeping anyone out. But we don't really seek entry to a place by initially criticizing someone, do we? I genuinely believe that the new person was confused and didn't know how to put across her words. She acknowledged my post where I had written so and then shared posts with some of the others, too. I thought we were all good from thereon. Didn't know this was brewing😕

Also, we know how some people on the forum can get too carried away. Can't really blame ppl for being defensive either. With time, we do get attached to some things and ppl more. Maybe that is the case with Nisha and the story. This is no longer like any other thread. The same ppl would get defensive about you girls, too if the situation arose. So as valid as your ideas of tolerance are, so is their defense. We should definitely be kinder in our words though. I hope we all can learn BALANCE some day. That is the trickiest word ever.😳

Edited by dristi64 - 8 years ago

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Vibhuti

@SparkleV

IF-Rockerz

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

This content was originally posted by: dristi64
VIBHU, ARYA
Nobody is keeping anyone out. But we don't really seek entry to a place by initially criticizing someone, do we? I genuinely believe that the new person was confused and didn't know how to put across her words. She acknowledged my post where I had written so and then shared posts with some of the others, too. I thought we were all good from thereon. Didn't know this was brewing😕

Also, we know how some people on the forum can get too carried away. Can't really blame ppl for being defensive either. With time, we do get attached to some things and ppl more. Maybe that is the case with Nisha and the story. This is no longer like any other thread. The same ppl would get defensive about you girls, too if the situation arose. So as valid as your ideas of tolerance are, so is their defense. We should definitely be kinder in our words though. I hope we all can learn BALANCE some day. That is the trickiest word ever.😳

She actually hadn't criticized, She mentioned about what she was told by
her mates about author , What i think is she was being honest and said what she heard, Her words were quite twisted and some of 'us' took it as totally against our beloved. Believe me, I would not take any harsh or defaming words for any Sosyian or story.
We could be lil eassyy that time, is all am saying!
People are defensive, its actually good and beneficial , it clearly depicts our bonding! and cheers to that!
Umm..let me bring manogna's posts for a Sosyian, didnt we told her politely in beginning, even the one was targeted took the matter easily and calmly :)
Balance in life is required.
This is debatable, but i dont want to be emerge as controversy.
Everyone has right to deal with situations as they feel.

Just like Arya said 'Words are powerful'.
Thanks di for replying!

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