SS 57 Common Love - Page 91

Am good.

All haze settled now at your place? Hope you ain't facing any problem now and enjoying your break with your R&B.

How is O?

Nams, girls who marry someone of their own choice against parents wishes , I think go through this, it's a sort of cross to bear. I am not entirely sure of this though.
But two three people whom I know have expressed this to me saying
" most times it's ok but on a few days we hv it real bad, that moment, you think if this marriage is worth it, may be it would have been better, if I had married someone my parents chose for me. "

It's not easy to see your parents having to compromise on culture, food , life style to accommodate the son in law/ daughter in law and other way round too when you see your spouse doing things for the inlaws which they wouldn't hv been comfortable doing during the initial adjustment period and in some , may be their whole life. Cos sometimes the life style, food, culture, practice , religion are such a mismatch, so distinct and different that it actually is no one's fault . And I think that this thought or self doubt comes. But most times, I wouldn't think I that the person who has this self doubt acts on it or follow up on it.
Cos all these people whom I'm talking about are still married and having a normal life.

And I think these girls just need a sound board to voice this out when they are feeling low coz they surely cannot share it with neither their parents nor the spouse .
It's a cross they hv to bear.

I think in today's context the horoscope matching or parents choosing Maapillai custom is slowly falling apart...
An iyer boy /girl brought up in Delhi  one brought up in Mylapore Madaveethi, Srirangam  and Bangalore may have some common aspects but a lot of differences.
I see that all around.  . As it is a sardar family residing in chennai whit 2 girls one with a circle of friends who were Tam brams so she was keen only on finding an iyer groom. She argues she cannot adapt to a Punjabi household...A marati speaking student of mine argues i find nothing in common with a pune based professional other than the community...how will i spend my entire life that way?

Being born and brought up in Bangalore their preferences of cuisine seems different. bearing the influences of the place they grew up or lived in.
I find this the case with a lot of the nephews and nieces raised in different parts of the world.

Home plays a major role in shaping our beliefs in our childhood, in young adulthood it becomes friends and the circle we move in and later the work place if we stay long enough and the new relationships we forge has a bearing on how we operate.

In our system where the girl marries and moves in with the husband and his family in most cases you need to find acceptance and mentoring in the customs and practices.
A dysfunctional home can be confounding to someone like II who is all the time seeking acceptance and validation from those around and bends backwards to do what would make others around happy.
The two are temperamentally different in many aspects. If they communicate and realise the space if affords it can be a harmonious symphony...if that doesn't happen it will be quite an uphill climb...the dude is accustomed to it she is a novice in trekking teamed up with a high altitude trekker. He needs to see how the pace can be matched...she has not even got acclimatized  expecting her to move to a summit attempt is trying.

When parents  choose your spouse  you have someone to blame when you make the choice you are accountable...in both you need to work to make it succeed

That's for Arishka ki mamma.

Asma take care!!

Hope II will understand that ranjan's happiness about her hosting a function at MM is more than what hurt he might feel if she 'betrays' chachi's invitation!!

II blaming the minute he entered her life,well,its a moment that happens in everyone's life!we will feel we r completely secure in whatever decisions we made,at good times.but switches all those off when a clash of thoughts n reality happens!that moment in sosy was one among those incidents which make us feel II n rnb r real...as afterall they too get stuck with or comes out of that passion -attraction world...as sri says,ii is finding it more difficult as she cant blame anyone else!!😆

I don't know what to say...
If II has 0.1% doubt on Dad she should not stay in MM...

Airtel 😡

Career
Dude in Delhi
Appa loving Dude
Dude loving Dad

She can't get everything...

Thanks Kajal but this is wht I m feeling now

Abhi tak nahi aaya?

Nahi abhi Nahi I think till 9 😭