Intertwined | PaRud OS (Mature) POSTED

Posted: 2014-05-06T06:46:26Z

The Author of this post have chosen to restrict the content of this Post to members only.


Posted: 2014-05-06T06:46:42Z

This is the longest OS I have ever written (I think) and also one of the hardest. And that for a few reasons. The biggest two being that its a mature OS and those are always hard to write and two I have never written mature work on anyone but Arnav-Khushi from 'Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon?' and hence this was just...well lets just say I have been writing this since the afternoon and it is now that it has finally finished! Another reason that made this hard to write was the pattern I was trying to follow which I hope makes sense to you.

So heres hoping you do not find it too long to be read or to boring to be liked! That said, constructive criticism is always welcome.

I would like to thank mistyrains for the banner and for also listening to me rant some rather interesting stuff while I went about writing this one and for being the first audience of this and giving me the support and encouragement to keep writing it! 

Cheers and Happy Reading everyone!

PS - Please edit out your Res'.

I have an ongoing drabble series on Rang Rasiya if you be interested - Mirror Images

And for more of my work on 'Rang Rasiya' and 'Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon?', please check -

My Index 


Edited by AngelTeen - 2014-05-06T08:01:46Z
47 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T06:47:15Z
This piece highlighted so many elements intrinsic to their characters. For instance, the leather of his jacket cooling her heated skin, for me at least it symbolised how different one is from the other. He - rugged, rough yet tender. She - soft, supple, coy yet so brave. And not only in that line, there are so many instances of this throughout the OS. It was a delight to the reader's senses - most of them, I think because it was so beautifully descriptive and refined, yet not vulgar even once. One can see him letting go of all inhibitions and embracing this woman with all his being, and his tenderness, his being careful with her was symbolic of the love in his heart. And the man in question, smiles and grins and chuckles throughout the scene, so endearing!' were the actions that mattered, the silences that she had to read' -such a simple, beautiful, poetic line but holding monumental meaning, summing up their entire equation. '...scratchy kiss on her knuckles' - such a cute para, the whole thing. I could listen to her giggle, and picture his smile. And the visuals that followed were rich, brimming with sensuality, yet such innocence. I mean for Rudra it wouldn't be his first time, but his emotions, his expressions, the smiles and the smirks, it was all so new for him - the way you have portrayed it, it was beautiful. What stood out for me was the end, it was so wonderful, so lyrical. Them not parting, intertwined in the true sense of the word, and in this surreal third space altogether - as were we; the aftermath of this amazing piece.

By the end I was blushing, smiling basically it left me a very happy woman. I won't say stunning, since your work doesn't stun me any more. But, it was beautiful, erotic and a great read. 

P.S : Thank you for your very, very amusing and distracting rants. I was thoroughly entertained throughout.
Edited by mistyrains - 2014-05-06T08:35:16Z
16 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T06:48:08Z
waiting for ur posting !Big smile
Edit :
Gawd !! the os, through drenched with blatant sexuality maintained itz aestheticism ! good job darling !Big smile
Edited by shreya_rc - 2014-05-06T09:40:11Z
2 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T06:51:30Z
Wow! Wonderful... Simply superb. I like the way Rudra placed mangalsutra on paro before marking her as his. The subtle way in which you described their communication thru their touches is awesome.Edited by sairam03 - 2014-05-06T09:32:57Z
2 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T06:57:40Z
That. Was. Beautiful.
This OS defines the term 'making love'.. It ws pure, unadulterated, n just moving..this is the best mature OS I hv ever read..
Sry I m gushing a bit, bt cant help it..for once, I read an OS that ws much much more than raw passion n hd emotions n bonding n understanding like none thoda gushing toh banta hai :)
Edited by asmi279 - 2014-05-06T08:34:53Z
4 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T07:04:08Z
Me Too Waiting.
Waise mature content is available only in OS. RR mein sirf laddoo milte hain wo bhi two types ke. - with and without iron


Read it just now. AngelTeen, hats off. That was the longest and the most mature OS I have ever read in this forum. And yes, I liked the pattern and yes, it made sense Smile

Have not read your other works. But definitely this one was written with such detail - I felt that we were looking at time in terms of nano seconds.

And had Rudra and Paro in mind acting this out all the while Wink

And the one which I did not expect was him putting the mangalsutra around her just before he took the plunge and uttering the forbidden three words in the nick of the time Embarrassed

At the risk of sounding repetitive - hats off AngelTeen
Edited by JJKKL - 2014-05-06T22:03:22Z
16 Likes this
Posted: 2014-05-06T07:09:15Z
Lakhon sorry !!! I competely forgot that I had to edit my smiley !
As usual Rae beautifully written .
So passionate yet so loving, both of them so eager in their own way .
Each word described their actions and emotions so clearly that left me spellbound and what a gift for her! both of his actions (love making and mangalsutra) spoke of his commitment and unspoken love towards her .
Keep it up and keep posting !!!!
Edited by vandana73 - 2014-05-13T08:37:04Z
2 Likes this

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