PaRud SS::Piya Na Rahe Man Basiya(Angst)Part 2 up, Note on PG 10(4/05)

Share
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:08:28Z

Hello Shello, Rangrasiyans.

As  you can see it's my first post, I am new here for you guys. Let me quote "for you guys". Because I have been here for nearly a month now but wasn't an IF-member. But after going through all brilliant stories and lovely posts, I have decided that I too want to be a part of this family yaar...

 

So as this is my first post here, I would like to name out few members, who had kept me hooked to this forum and thus can't resist joining it.



 

Napstermonster"Who? I mean who don't know your stories? I mean it's a crime to come on this forum and not to read your stories. I always read your stories and appreciate the hard work you put into each update. I apologize for not commenting on your stories, reason I have explained"Just registered today.  But I love you and your stories.Hug



 

Princessunara"You are such a sweet girl.HugI love your beautiful posts and snaps and not to forget your lovely analysis. I just love it and love you more for the efforts you put.


 


MoronsKiMallika--- You know I love your analysis. The way you describe Paro's  emotions and pen it down so beautifully, I just love it. My fav was the 8-Vachan shaadi wala analysis. I really loved it.Hug



 

-Zara- -- Another brilliant writer of this  forum. You just keep me hooked by the twist an turns you bring in your stories. I love your stories and you more for sharing it with us.Hug

 



All in all I love everyone here, and I hope my love is being reciprocated.Hug


So here is my futile attempt to write something. I know I am nothing close to a writer but RR is really really something, can't keep yourself away from the bug PaRud, now can you? No right. So if you are still there after listening to my boring speech than go ahead and get yourself little more bored and read the first part of Three shot on PaRud.





Part 1




 "Haa..." the acerbic tone of her Kaki-sa reached Paro's ears as she was about to pass the aangan to place her wet clothes on the rope to soak the cloth dry but her steps halted as her ears perked to hear what her Kaki-sa was telling. Usually that tone is singularly reserved for her. So her innocent heart consoled her that she was not eyes dropping and thus she can stay and listen to her Kaki-sa.

 


"Nahi Maaji-sa, sach kahu hoon. Devar-sa saach main Paro se nafrat na karte. Balki who toh zara sa kharoj bhi na dekh sakte Paro par. Maine dekha hai unhe" Maithili's face adorned a beautiful smile and an illusory glow on her face. Her mind went back to the night her frantic Devarji-sa had knocked at her door, asking her to change Paro's wet cloth. And that day, her obeisant Devarji-sa had won her respect, and who can forget the pain"the pain that was inflicted on  Paro's body but was mirrored through her Devarji-sa's demeanor.



But the smile on her face was short lived as she heard her Maaji-sa's next remark.



"Ha ha...bilkul. Nafrat kyun karega? Balki woh dona Rudra aur Paro na hain. Who toh Shiv aur Parvati hain." Kaki-sa joined her both hands in a mocking prayer. "Ek doosre ke bina reh hi na sakte, kyun Maithili binddni?" no one can beat Kaki-sa  in her sarcasm. "Waise, agar teri baat maan bhi le, toh chaar mahine ho gaye unke shaadi ko, toh ab tak kuch kushkhabri kyun na padi maare kaano pe, ya phir maare kaano ka mausam kharab ho gaya hain?..." Kaki-sa continued after a seconds pause. "Ya phir aisa to nahi ki apne Jija ki tarah Paro bhi khushkhabri dene ke kabil hi na hain?" her sardonic tongue raced, uncaring about the hurt she was causing on the two innocent soul.



Maithili's eyes misted instantly and she held her head down, as if ashamed of the thing which was not in her hand. If Bhoolenath is taking pleasure in keeping the beautiful gift bestowed upon every women, away from her than she will take it.




The hand which was holding the yellow transparent curtain, fell to her side as she bit back a sob. All vows her husband has taken while marrying her and the harsh words that had followed along this four months, came back to haunt her. Paro closed her eyes, she don't want to recall all that. She really don't want. She wants to be strong, strong enough to take all the pain her husband was giving her and fight back with a smile. She knows this is the only way she can reach her destination. This is her test, her Bhoolenath and her husband were taking her test, and she was passing every level by ducking all the indifference of her husband. Her legs came to life as she started where she was about to go.


It was not like her husband was beating her physically, like she had heard around her village and even from some of the workers of Kaki-sa. She will have to make peace with that. She was taking anything and will take anything as long as her strength will allow her. But...Paro swallowed as she hung her ghaghra on the rope. His...his late night gracing was bit difficult to take. Sometimes he comes so late that its time for her to wake up. And sometimes...Paro tried to control the tears from falling down her cheek. Sometimes he even doesn't shows up for days. She don't want to nurture any vile thoughts about her Major Sahab. But...but the woman in her was unable to take this. She is ready to take his every harsh words but...but in exchange she only wants him to return home on time, dine with her, sleep on his bed, where she can see him. Was it too much to ask?


What was lacking in their relationship? Now he knows she is innocent, he knows she hadn't tried to harm Bapu-sa, she was not the one who had provided her pictures to media. She had proved it all. Than what is holding him back? Why wasn't she forgiven for the crime she had done unknowingly? Paro closed her eyes as more tears spilled from their never ending source.



 "chaar mahine ho gaye unke shaadi ko, toh ab tak kuch kushkhabri kyun na padi maare kaano pe"



Kaki-sa's taunt rang in her ears, like a needle prickling her heart. A sob wracked her body as she slummed against the pillar. What sin she has done to be treated like this? Why was she so unwanted by her own husband? She needs to do something, this loneliness, this ignorance has started killing her now. Will...will he start considering her if she gave her body to him? Will it make any difference to him? Will he then return home early? Will he then dine with her? Will he then whisper sweet nothings in her ears, just like Samrath Bhai-sa whispers in Jija's ear? Will he?  She is ready to do even that if he will reciprocate the tiniest bit of her love. She loves him, he is her husband, so if giving herself to him will bring him closer to her than she is ready to do even that.


Paro supported herself against the pillar to get up. She will wait for him today. She smiled.


Major sahab's bride will wait for him tonight!




Part 2 -- PG 6





So? Liked it? Hate it? I really dont know what I have done there.Ouch So if you want to read further than please let me know otherwise, its  ---The End--Big smile Actually I have two more parts(not ready...just in my mindLOL) But will not continue if you  guys dont want . Smile

 

Edited by tic-tac - 2014-05-04T08:51:28Z
81 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:37:22Z
amazing piece of work..u described paro's feelings so well! do continue :)
1 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:43:33Z
Continue soon dear
Nice story
1 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:45:58Z
Awesome work.. would love to read more.. 
1 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:46:06Z
Don't stop here please :(
Really enjoyed reading it...you described Paro's pain really well :(
Please continue soon...waiting  :)
1 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:51:48Z
u have to continue !!!!!!!!!!!!!
1 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:56:36Z
Hello!
First of all AWWIE! You read my little stories!?!? Thanks so much for enjoying them! Hehehe *blush*

And to your fab story. Paro's feelings are really well displayed and it really does hurt to see Rudra comeing late and even disappearing for a few nights. I'm not going to go straight to the obvio of Laila as it could be Rudra is feeling guilty for accusing Paro as it seems all truth about her innocence is out in the open. Rudra could also be hateful and avoiding of the Thakuraiyn aspect or he's too scared to get any closer to Paro cuz he's already fallen for her. SO LOTS of possibilities here, LOL. 

I LOVE ANGST btw. Especially if Rudra's hurting inside as he's done alot of hurting for Paro's little heart on the show so I have had enough. Time for Rudra to feel a little guilty and pain...*sigh* 

So that's my rant and intro and compliment and comment done :)
x
4 Likes this
Posted: 2014-04-15T05:57:33Z
Thank you so very much! I am honored beyond words! You totally made my day, you know!
I loved your story. Loved the build up to the explosion I can imagine in the next part, and it can go in so many different directions-sensual, anger filled, devastating, tragic. It cam even be funny, given Paro's zero knowledge of what seduction and being a proper bride means and rudra years and YEARS of experience with all that! I really like how there is very little in this part to indicate the direction you'll take us in the next one--thats hard to convey, and you've done the whole movement to the final act very nicely!

What I liked the most--because it was so subtle-- is the small sense of worry you've inserted--Paro is thinking---at least Rudra doesn't physically beat me--the image it brings to the reader's mind is immediate--so what does he do to her, that the physical act of torture is missing and she is GRATEFUL for that small mercy? As women, we all know that there are worse things than physical violence, though that is of course heinous. But to psychologically tear down a person give her emotional blows every day, especially to play with her feelings and exploit the honesty and truth of those feeling-s-thats some serious damage there.

You've upped the ante by bringing the action for them tonight, when Rudra gets home right back to the one thing she has not sacrificed to him--her body. And the reason she is now ready to--her mental acceptance of him. And of course, its the one thing he wants, above everything. But he will always hate her if her finally gets--khoobsuraat aurat jo hai! Looking forward to how you continue from here, and where your next few parts take you--please write!

I hope you'll continue, and I hope you'll be someone who we can also get to know very well over the next weeks, as we obsess over the exact same thing! This forum, and the people in it,are particularly nice, much MUCH less crazy//judgmental  that the other one I've been on, so this is a good place for you to really explore your writing, and express yourself openly and without any worry. I am really really touched you read my work, (please feel free to comment, now that you have joined!) and even more happy to welcome another writer to the community!

-Navin
Edited by napstermonster - 2014-04-15T06:21:14Z
5 Likes this

Related Topics

Topics Author Replies Views Last Post Reply
Parud Edit:Parud Sangeet

Mano.M   42   5375

Mano.M 42 5375 2014-11-19T12:37:55Z _sush_
Swenna10 3 2691 2014-05-23T19:39:04Z sadhnasoumya
O RE PIYA HAYE O RE PIYA :)

natkhat..anki..   26   2598

natkhat..anki.. 26 2598 2014-01-07T22:55:55Z natkhat..anki..
SwathiAnthy 16 2262 2014-06-27T23:20:09Z SwathiAnthy
-Zara- 2 23941 2014-03-03T14:37:36Z -Zara-

Topic Info

  • 87 Replies
  • 17577Views

Topic started by -NatureLover-

Last replied by Parud7

FORUM QUICK JUMP

TOP