Kaki cum Masi and her airhead Daughter in law are locked away.
DIL: Who is he? Is he a macho man or what?
Kaki cum Masi: Shut up, you impertinent girl. My son's have bigger Moonch than him.
DIL: Sorry, maaji, but this man is leagues above your sons. His moonch has length, breadth and thickness.
Kaki cum Masi: You rascal of hidden meanings! no more India Forums for you. Go stick your head inside red chilli powder. .
Moonchiya carries his light as a feather current captive soon to be future bride into the consumashuns room.
Now, Moonchiya decides to board up the windows and any airways into the room. Hey Devi Maiyy...sorry sorry Jai Ma Trisula, I will phodo three Nariyals everyday from now till consumashuns. Give me more Garam masala and while you are at it Jai Ma Trisula, give Paro some new clothes. I am getting Khujli from her choker and gota.
Then our Phatphatiya goes about partitioning the house making sure the Jacuzzi, the mini lily pond and the wide open window, all of which hold potential for a million dream sequences, are cordoned off to his side of the house. The kitchen and dirty store rooms go to the Masala Queen.
Masala Queen is furiously snorting Asfoetida Powder and wonders when her buff Desi Boyzz sons would be back from their gig.
Paro wakes up and what does she find? Rudra's teen room that hasn't been cleaned or used in the last 10 years.
Paro: Hawww! yeh kya gandi gandi pictures hain?
Rudra walks in with snacks and tea.
Rudra: Thats Raquel Welch and this is Bridgitte Bardot. Pin-up girls. I am not a saint, you know *we know, snort*
Paro: Chi! You were a ganda bacha
Rudra: I am not ready for Gandi baath. But first, eat something. Here is some nuts and dry fruits to get you strong.
Paro: Is there any Imli and Namak? And I need some fiber in my diet, i haven't , you know, in three days.
Rudra: umm, ok, I will fetch Isabgol on my way back. but I got some food...What? Mustard oil and Flour. Ugh! wrong dabba
The flour dust gets so excited seeing he handsome Moochiya, it jumps out of the box to caress his manly moonch. Of course, Moonchiya is a bit vain. He checks himself out and cleans up the flour dust quickly, lest Paro think any less of his Moonch.
Rudra: Ahem, ugh! Got flour on me. But I am handsome ok. See?
And we get a tender tender moment of a small slip up and a wee bit of weakness in RPR5000watt. He cares, awww, he cares how he appears to Paro. I was dusting my screen, over excited and got ahead of myself as usual. Rudra Score 1
Paro: What am I doing here?
Rudra: Don't you get it? We will play ghar ghar here. You be the mummy, I will be the daddy
Paro: Yo, Rudra, yoo hoo, Rudy, isn't that what they call you?
Rudra: Yes, so what?
Paro: do you know Rudy, Shivji is also called Rudra. I am Parvati, you are Rudra. Rudra-Parvati, Parvati-Rudra, get it? get it?
Rudra looks blank
Paro: Ok never mind, just show me your kind side.
Rudra: If I show you my kind side, you will never leave me.
Paro: hain?
Rudra: never mind, suffice it to say, I got third eye with X-ray vision and I like what I see.
Paro: hain?
Rudra: Look. I might sneak a peek at a post or two on India forums, but I am no hidden meaning expert. So spell out what you want,
Paro: Na janay kon se din is se pala pada. Sari ke Fall sa chipak gaya hai. Na khud jaatha hai, na mujhe jaane detha hai.
Rudra: say what? did you say you don't want saree, because I can..
Paro folds her hands: Please, leave. So i can scream for help...please.
Rudra: ok, but this room is sound proof, ya think i don't know a thing or two about secret consumashuns? bwahahaha
Outside, Kaki cum Masi rubs in some more Asfoetida (hing) powder on rudra then she threatens to bring bad Mausam. Meri Amma, I am freezing my behind in Chicago polar vortex with -20Farenheit, if i hear one more person talk about bringing bad weather, I swear, I will murder you.
Tomorrow Desi Boyzz arrive and first remove all the dollars snuck into their G-string thongs before attacking Future bhabhi ka room.
Actually Devar sa was really mad that Bhabhi took that room because he is afraid someone will discover his hidden stash of *ahem cough cough* neela wala movies under the bed. Masala kha kha ke bahuth charbi a gayi hai re!
Thanks Semanti & Miss Teeq for a trip down the memory lane. This song, aha! high point of art and Father of all consumashuns song ( ps. Mamta Kulkarni quit acting after this)
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aXSzhcMy_8[/YOUTUBE]
Edited by serialjunkie - 10 years ago
