FF: HumRaaz.. Update Page: 4

Posted: 2013-02-20T02:10:17Z

AGI : Agarwal Group of Industries.
Rukmini Devi: Daadi. Mother of Amarnath agarwal.
Amarnath Agarwal: Head of the AGI. - Babuji
Krishna Agarwal: Wife of Amarnath Agawal. - Maaji
Ram Agarwal: Eldest son, most responsible and loving family member. Heads all the branches of AGI.
Gaurav Agarwal: Second son. MD of the AGI.
Shilpa Agarwal: Wife of Gaurav Agarwal.
Chaya Agarwal: Daughter. Loves her brother Ram. Has major differences with Shilpa.
Kamal Agarwal and Rishab Agarwal: Twins. Not very happy with Shilpa bhabi. 
Natasha Agarwal: The youngest and most loved family member. 

Vikram Shergill: Ram's best friend.
Neha Shergill: Vikram's wife.

Janki Associates: One of the biggest Architectural Firms in the world. Owns the biggest educational trust in India.
Narayani Devi: Head of Janki Associaltes.
Janki Devi: Daughter of Narayini Devi. (Lives in NY)
Sudhir Sharma: MD of Janki Associates.
Priya Sharma: Daughter of Sudhir Sharma. GM of Janki Associates.
Karthik Sharma: Son of sudhir sharma.

Suyash Mehra: A well known industrialist. Head of Atlantic group of industries.
Rajeshwari Mehera: suyash's wife.

A twisted tale of trust, love and values.

Will update once a week. 

Edited by BawraMann - 2013-03-16T23:11:20Z
14 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T02:34:21Z
like the character intro
but one problem: dont change the surname.kapoor is the best
names sounds like u taken it from kahaani ghar ghar ki.
2 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T02:36:14Z
Originally posted by sandhyasn

like the character intro
but one problem: dont change the surname.kapoor is the best
names sounds like u taken it from kahaani ghar ghar ki.

ya even i was about to say the something u kept sharma as it is so use kapoors for ram's family rest janaki devi n all is fine
2 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T04:40:06Z
Ram Kapoor suits best so please keep it like that other than this sounds superbly interesting, nicely done character sketch, will wait for the update
2 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T05:23:35Z
Chapter 1: 

Apne the.. Apno ke pyaar thi.. 

Its about 5:00 early in the morning.. Ram drove through empty streets.. the air was frsh and cold.. the touch of the cold air.. brought a smile on his face..He had been busy with an international client all night and was tired.. he thought to himself.. Maa se daant padegi.. aaj farmhouse jaana hai.. aur itni der ghar laut aaya.. The gates of the mansion open to his royal bently..  He parked his car and got out..  Kamal and Rishab waled out dragging the luggage out of the main door.. 
Ram smiled as he saw them.. Chaya who was slightly over weight panted as she dragged her oversized suitcase.. 
Chaya: Shouting.. Kamal.. Arre jaldi bansi kaka ko bhejo!,
Kamal giigling.. Arre didi.. Toda kaam karo.. Wazan kam hojaayega.. Nutz Rishab and Kamal burst out laughing.. All of them help bansi kaka and mansuk load the lugguage.. Ram walks and helps them.. 
Amarnath and Krishna walk towards the car together.. 
Ram takes their blessings.. 
Maaji: Kuch raho..
Bauji: Ram beta tera saara saamaan Rishab aur Kamal ne milkar pack kardiya hai.. 
Ram: Ji bauji..  Thinking.. Kuch na kuch gadbad kiya hoga dono milkar.. 
Maaji: Hum waha Sharmaji ko milne jaa rahe.. Mehras ke saat coloboration ke baare mein baat karlena..
Ram smiles.. Ji maa.. Joh aap tik samjhe..
Vikram Neha come with their kids.. And take blessings from Amarnath and Krishna.. 
A girl of about the age of 4 runs towards Ram.. Papaa..
Ram kneels down and hugs her.. 
Ram: Shruthi tumhaari bag kisne pack kiya..
Shruthi: Papa.. Woh chaya bua ne kardi! 
She runs to Ridhima Sameer and Rahul..
Vikram: Bauji.. Aap aur Maaji chaliye.. Hum abhi aathe hai.. 
Eveyone get into the large car.. 
Ram looks at his family.. They meant the world to him.. Vik Neha started chasing the children into the car.. While Kamal and Chaya fought woth eachother.. Rishab was busy planning pranks with Natasha.. While bauji and maaji disscussed bussiness with Gaurav.. Shilpa looked annoyed with all the work she had to do.. And was grumpy.. 
Ram smiled to himself.. The cool breeze brought him back.. From his thoughts. He walked and sat in the last row with vikram and Neha.. They were all set.. 
Bauji: sab log aagaye.. 
Kamal: Haan bauji.. 
Bauji: Chalo raju!
The entire family started off to lonawla.. The kids satbwith Mansuk and bansi Kaka.. Rishab and Nutz sat together and disscussed their college.. Kamal and Chaya fought while everyone else laughed over their conversation.. Ram smiled.. This was what he loved.. They were his pride.. His love.. His honour..
Vik Neha slept in eachothers embrace while Ram dozed off..


In lonawla.. 
A beautiful.. Garden.. A woman dressed an a peach saree walks with a silver plate in her hand.. Her knee length long hair let loose.. A beautiful bindi adorning her forehead.. She had a fair complexion.. Lovely bright eyes.. Lined with kohl.. Her ears had small gold jhumkas.. Her red lips curved into a smile as she picked the jasmine.. She wore gold bangles.. Her thin long fingers sofltly plucked the flowers she chose.. And put the on the plate.. She walked on the lawn bare foot.. Her gold anklets shone on her smooth skin.. They didnt jingle.. They were as quite as the cold breeze was.. Which blew by her face.. 
Karthik ran to her: Di... Good Morning..
She turned around.. Good morning.. He took her blessings.. Di mein tayaar hoke aatha hu.. Papa aapko bularahe hai..
She smiles.. Haan.. Tum jao.. Mein abhi aathi hu.. 

Narayani Devi looks down from her balcony and smiles.. As she sips her coffee.. 
Her phone rings.. 
ND: Haan bolo Suyash beta.. 
Suyash (Anup Soni): Mein maaji aur bauji ke saath kuch dino ke liye waha aaraha hu.. 
ND: oh thats great!
Suyash: Ji Narayini ji.. Waha Amarnath uncle bhi aarahe.. Agar bussiness ki colaboration ki baat bhi hojaathi toh..
ND: Of course.. Tum sab aajao.. Baitke baat karenge.. waise yeh Amarnathji kaun hai?
Suyash: AGI ke maalik.. 
ND: ok beta.. See you.
Suyash: Namaste.

12 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T05:54:10Z
everything set for raya first meeting so ram has a daughter already 
how easily u manage to write about so many characters keep it up n cont soon
1 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T06:07:13Z
nice but  i dont like sar name agarwala Wink
1 Likes this
Posted: 2013-02-20T10:21:53Z
Chapter 2:

Tere dil ka mere dil se.. Rishta puraana hai..

Ram woke up from his nap.. Vik Neha were still asleep.. 
Chaya: Ram bhaiyya.. Dekhiye na yeh Kamal.. Kitna chedtha hai..
Kamal: Arre mein kuch galat kaha.. Dekho apne aap ko.. Bhai se bhi moti hogayi ho.. 
Chaya: oye.. Tujhe na mein baad mein dekhlungi..
Rishab: Chaya didi.. Aap narraz mat hoyiye.. Ram bhaiyya.. Aap apne chasme isse dedijiye yeh jee bharke Kamal ko dekhlenge.. 
Everyone burst out laughing.. Ram nodded in negative as he giggled along..
The children were engrossed playing chinese whisper..
Nutz: Finally hum bhabi se milenge.. 
Ram looked astonished: Bhabi? Shilpa toh aage baiti hai.. 
Nuts and Rishab look at eachother and smile.. Shilpa turns and gives all of them an angry look.. 
Shilpa: Kya bhabi bhabi laga rakha hai.. Pehele toh Ram bhaiyya ko milne do unse..
Ram stared at all of them.. Kisse? Yeh kya baatein horahi hai.. ?
Rishab: Aamm.. Woh.. Bauji.. Aap bauji se puchiye.. 
Amarnath: Haan Ram beta humne tumhaareliye rishta pakki kardiya..
Ram with a shocked expression.. Par bauji..
Amarnath: tumhe koi aitraaz hai Ram?
Ram: Nahi bauji.. Jaise aap aur maa tik samjhe.. He looks out of the window.. Thinking.. Mereliye jeevan saathi chunliya sab ne.. Aur ab bata rahe hai.. He smiles..
Kamal: Ahem.. Bhaiyya.. Waise bhabhi na dekhne mein na.. Woh..
Rishab: haan.. Bhai.. Woh bhabi naa.. 
Ram is waiting to know how she looks.. Haan bolo..
Nutz: woh kya hai na.. Chaya didi jaisi hai.
Ram widens his eyes.. Kya..?
Chaya: Arre jao jao.. Mein unke jaisi bilkul nahi hu..
Everyone starts laughing..
Krishna: haan.. Tumhaari jaisi bilkul nahi hai.. Bohot acchi hai..
Ram: whispers.. Kamal tere paas photo hai..
Kamal loudly.. Bauji.. Aapke paas bhabi ka photo hai.. Everyone laughs loudly..
Amarnath: oho Ram beta. Vikram ke paas hai.. Lelo.. 
Ram smiles embarassed.. 
Kamal holds his ears.. Sorry bhaiyya..
Everyone giigle.. 
Rishab: Vikram bhaiyya utiye..
Vikram wakes up.. Kya hai Rishab..
Rishab: Hume woh bhabi ki tasveer dijiye...
Vikram gets up with all enthusiasm.. And smirks at Ram.. Oho toh Ramji ko apne begum ko dekhna hai.. 
Ram: In an angry tone.. Haan toh..
Vikram takes a picture out and Chaya snatches it.. 
Chaya: Haaaww.. Yeh bhabi hai.. Shilpa snatches it from her.. 
Shilpa: Kya.. Impossible..looking at the photo..
Kamal and Rishab take the photo from her.. They kiss the photograph.. Bhai.. Uff!
Ram thinking.. Yeh sab aise kyu react karrahe hai.. 
Nutz takes the photo: Kya?! No ways.. Vikram bhaiyaa.. Aap yeh kaise mazaak kar rahe hai? And giggles..
Vikram: Arre koi mazaak nahi hai.. Waise yaha kisiko pata hai ki bhabi ka naam kya hai?
Ram: Arre pehele photo toh do mujhe..
Nutz: Arre puri zindagi unke saat hi bitarahe hai.. Toh abhi kya jaldi hai.. 
Everyone giggle.. 
Krishna: Arre ram beta.. Ab toh hum aagaye.. Khud apni biwi ko pehechaano.. And she takes the photo from Nutz..
Vikram: haan yeh hui na baat.. Dekthe hai.. Ahem.. 
Neha gets up.. Yawns.. Arre wah.. Were almost there.. Chalo baccha party.. 
Shruthi looks at Ram..Papaa.. And smiles.. He lifts and pulls her into an embrace.. Bolo..
Shruthi: hum mumma ko dekhne jaarahe ?
Ram turns red.. Everyone laughs.. 
Ram: Haan.. And scratches his temples.. Shruthi smiles at him..
They enter the large gates open for them.. 
It seems like an endless garden.. With mexican grass.. Bushess.. Flowers.. And trees.. The place looked lush green and colourful with various species of plants.. They parked the vehicle and got out.. Ram looks at the huge farmhouse.. It was bigger than any of his farmhouses.. It had a beautiful portico with hanging pots.. All of them got down.. He recognised.. Sudhir Sharma and Karthik Sharma.. As they greeted the family.. With Shruthi in his arms.. He managed to just smile.. He saw a woman coming out of the farmhouse.. Rishab Kamal and Natasha ran to her.. Shouting.. bhabi.. 
She smiled. As they took her blessings and hugged her.. Shruthi distracted him..
Shruthi: Papaa.. Aapki chasma do na..
Ram: Nahi shruthi.. Tum jao.. He puts her down and she runs along with the kids.. Everyone goes inside as he walks towards her.. She took blessing from everyone.. 
He looked at her.. Shruthi.. Went up to her hugged her and kissed her on her belly.. She huged shruthi back.. Shruthi looked at her.. And smiled.. Everyone else walked inside.. Ram walked up to her.. He smiled to her.. She carried herself with dignity.. She looked flawless.. Her eyes twinkled neatly kohled.. She looked divine in the peach saree..  He put his hands forward..
She did a namaste.. He bangled clashed with each other..  Her bindi was a big one with intricate designs.. He was lost in her beauty.. Simplicity.. The traditional values she had..
Ram smiled.. He too did a namaste.. Mein Ram hu.. Aap ? 
She looked at him and smiled.. Mein Priya hu.. Andar aayiye..
She turned around.. Her hair was ver long.. Straight silky and shiny.. Her perfume was enchanting.. It wasnt rose.. His sisters never used this he thought.. He smiled at his thought process.. 
Everyone stood before god.. Ram left his foot wear and came.. 
Maaji: Priya.. 
Priya smiled.. Ji maaji.. And went to her..
Maaji: Aaj meri badi bahu aarthi karegi.. Ram aao.. Bahu ke saat aarthi karo.. 
Ram walked towards Proya who took the magalaarthi in her hands.. He held her hands.. her skin wasnsoft.. his heart skipped a beat.. as she moved her finger avoiding his touch.. he held her hands firmly purposely.. and they did aarthi together.. He looked at her.. And she smiled while she looked at god.. Her ears turned pink.. Her cheeks flushed..
There were no exchange of words.. They hadnt met before.. But her acceptance made her his.. 
Shruthi came running.. And hugged Priya.. Mumma mein bhi karu?
Priya helped her hold the aarthi.. And made her do the aarthi.. Everyone smiled.. Ram observed her care and love..
Kamal: Bhabi mujhe bhi karvaayiye na..
Rishab: mujhe bhi. Nutz rushed along with Kamal and Rishab as the all held her hands.. She giggled.. 
Ram smiled..thinking.. Risthe jodne se pehele hi.. Bhabi, maa aur meri dost bangaye.. He smiles.. There was something about her.. So much love and calmness in her..  He snapped out of his thought process.. As she placed prashad in his palms.. 
Shruthi skids and crasshes into Ram and Priya: Ouch..
Both Ram and Priya: Sambhal ke..  They looked at eachother.. And smiled.. 
Kamal: Ahem.. Bhabi.. Waise shaam ko shaadi hojaayegi.. Toh aap offically Shruthi ki maa.. Ram Bhayya ki ardhangini.. Aur khas karke meri pyaar bhabi banjaayenge.. 
Priya smiles.. Ram: Shaam ko shaadi? He smiles.. 
Rishab: Bhabi chaliye na.. Mehendi lagalijiye.. Bohot saare rasme hai.. 
They pull her away.. Shruthi runs behind her holding her pallu.. 
Ram smiles..
He watches her walk.. He is lost incher beauty.. Thinks.. Ek baar mudho.. Sirf mereliye.. 
Priya feels like Ram had called her.. She turns to look at hime.. He smiles miming a thankyou.. She smiles back..
Chaya puts on some instrumental music.. 
Everyone turn to Ram.. And together they shout.. Bhabi keliye ek gannaa.. 


Tere dil ka mere dil se.. 
Rishta puraana hai.. 
In aankon ke har aansoo..
Mujhko churaana hai.. 

He looks at her..  There is a sudden emptiness in both of them.. It felt like they had been separated.. And longed for each other.. 

Tere bechaini kaa.. 
Tere tanhaayi kaa.. 
Ehsaas hai mujko sunn...

Priya: looks at his eyes.. They cared.. They loved..

Mein joh saath tere hu..
 Phir tujhe hai kaisa ghum.. 
Dar baatlenge hum sun...
In palko mein khushiyon ka..
Sapna sajaana hai..

Everyone was delighted.. Everyone was busy with the preparations.. 
Her voice had translated his hearts emotions.. Their hearts.. It was a new safar.. Joh was saath mein tai karne jaarahe the..

10 Likes this

Related Topics

Topics Author Replies Views Last Post Reply
luvsakshi 1180 85344 2017-06-15T10:54:36Z rampriya7aug
luvsakshi 1255 72363 2016-10-16T23:45:13Z luvsakshi
luvsakshi 1215 75263 2016-10-16T23:43:18Z luvsakshi
jeena1993 330 50358 2016-04-19T20:07:32Z leena04
SanjanaS. 161 22596 2013-11-30T16:04:25Z RAYAFAN2

Topic Info

  • 29 Replies
  • 5752Views

Topic started by BawraMann

Last replied by sreev12