Debate: Arrange Marriage Vs Love Mariage

This topic is quite complex..😉 

Arrange Marraige Vs Love Marriage

Arrange Marriage: A marriage where the bride's and the groom's parents decides the match..

Love Marraige: A marriage where the bride and the groom has fallen in love and decides to marry each other..

Which one is better???? Thats a big question?? Isnt it?? 😊

A lot of people who has love marriage says that after a while love fades out and what remains is marriage... On the other hand couples who had Arrange marriage says that we are so not compatable and we married each other because our familes wanted to..

A lot of us might feel that nowadays the boys and girls decide whom they want to marry but in India there are still many families who would want their children to marry according to their choice, family and status because Indian Marriages are Marriage between 2 Families..

So what do u think?????? Share in your thoughts...

Is a known devil better than the unknown one!!! 😆

 

Edited by J. - 17 years ago

Wow kirtz, what a topic!! 😕 😛 All I can say about this is that it's not like one or the other is "better". It depends on whether it lasts or not 😉

When two people get married, they make a commitment of a lifetime (I hope. Aaj ke zamaane mein...u know😔)

If they have a love marriage and their p's are okay with it, then great. As long as they don't have problems with each other later on 😛😉 But if they married against their parents' will AND they have problems later on, that's bad REALLY bad So I guess it's fine if people have love marriages as long as their parents aren't going to commit suicide after the two get married or something 😉

Arranged marriages are great, in my opinion, as long as the guy/girl has a say in it. It's just from people around me (my parents, aunts & uncles, etc. etc.), that I've noticed that arranged marriages work aND last 😳 And this might not be true, par then I have an uncle that got married (love marriage) a couple months ago and now they're filing for a divorce 😭 😕 So I just speak from what's going on around me, let's hear what you all have to say 😊

Im sorry if anything I said in this post offended anyone. I'm only 17, don't know a thing about being married. 😳 Please take it as a debate issue 😉 😳

Cheers,
Himani

i hv to say love marriage.. coz i dont know anything abt arrange marriage.. where i live.. where i come from.. we dont hv arranged marriage... cud be tht 1 person from 100 does.. bt its not in our tradition to go for arranged ones..

we hv to decide whom we want to spend our lives n so on.. n then its how we get into it.. so its all love marriage for us.. 99% 😃

nice one 😛

well! if the person who is getting marrried is mature than he/she knows how to choose a partner,
what really happends is some people actually sometimes dont know wether it is real love or just attraction, if it is attraction than there is a danger that later on in life their relationship might not work out!
when it is arranged marriage, both man/woman should agree and get to know each other before marraige, if they are just gettng married because their parens wants them to than, defenatly there is a danger.
it is true that parents have seen better world than you, but parents may not have seen your choice, the other person's habits and intrests. sometimes relationships does not last for long because both of theirs thinking is differant!
it is not true for sure that love marriages does not last for long! if the person seen other person's inside out,knows how he/she is like and knows that person is right for them than deffanetly love marriage is also good!
i ve seen arrange marriages, its not their choice but of their parents, they might not be happy but just got married coz of their parents, and later i have seen those arguements in the copoule. than here their parents are not their!!!
however its not true for sure that arrange marriages as well dont work out but yes, if they both hve seen each other, got to know each other, and agrees than there wont be any problems!

if we take it this way, arrange marriages are good if your parents knows your choice and you agree with it,
but not good when it is only your parent's chpice but not yours!
love marriage is good when you the person inside out and loves him/her truely and know before marriage that u can handle them for the rest of your life 😃

So I prefer Love Marriage.. atleast u don't feel like an alien to some other house. A girl who has spent soo many years growing with her parents, siblings, a different atmosphere altogether has to go to some other place and adapt herself accordingly. So if she knows th person before hand whom she is going to spend her whole life, it makes her easier to a just and compromises with the situation and become accustomed to the surrounding. . There are basic ingredients of successful marriage, Trust, Commitment compromise and understanding. So whether its love or arrange, these are the basic, but if u knw the person well enough then situations becomes more easy.

In love marriage most of the differences arises because of the reasons like you used to cal me soo many times before marriage n after marriage u hardly give me a call. Before marriage u used to take me out every day, now its not even in a month u take me out. But if there is an understanding between two ppl these small small reason of differences can be eliminated.

In love marriage, two people fall in love without any judgment. So they accept the person as it is. And love changes a person.

But in arrange marriage, there is a list of characteristics which a girl should possess and one feels as if its been slaughter in some market.

Everyone changes with time so is the person we marry with our consent. So, if we understand each other and accepts the other person as it is, life becomes easier.

In the last I can only say, I prefer Love marriage on arrange marriage but with the consent of my parents and elders.

Arrange Marriage or Love?

Well, every individual person leads a different life, and come from a different backgroud. Their upbringing is different, and the relationships they share with their parents is also indivudual.

For example, if i was speaking about myself i would go for a arrange marriage. i have been brought up to beleive that my parents will choose my life partner, but i share a strong bond with my mom. she knows exactly how i am like, my dislikes, likes.. she knows exactly how i would react in different situations. so i completely trust my moms choice, cuz she has brought me up .. and i have been living with my parents for 18 years. who knows me better than them??

on the other hand, Love marriage is also great. as i am currently in a relationship with someone who holds a secure job, is hoping to get a promotion and is upto my moms and dads standards. so when the time comes i will tell them about this person.. but for now i think if they do have someone in mind for me then i would trust them completely.

thanks for reading!

kim

Good discussion topic!


I think love marriage is better...beacause arrange marriage may leave u feeling unhappy...its like ur marrying a stranger!

But....girls/guys have agrange marriages to please their parents...they want to make them proud of them.

I think guys/girls are scared of loosing there familis so they take that option of arrange marriage because if they have a love marriage there parents may not like the guy or girl!

Love marriages...have stronger bonds...a stronger relationship because u know the person....

Some families have left there children because they have married sum1 they didn want them to marry nd it has caused an arugument between two families!

Love marriage is better by far!
id choose that!



😊

I'll post mine later Good Post 👏 👏

love marriage is better 😳

Awesome topic 👏

Many points to be made here

First of all, if its gonna be a love marriage against the parents, or an arranged marriage forcefully towards the spouse-to-be, then its all bekaar.

At the sound of it, love marriage sounds like heaven. In a love marriage, the girl, the boy, both are happy and excited... a sort of confidence grows within. BUT there are so many backdraws each gender has. Girls have mood-swings(most), temper tantrums (some), etc. Guys have an ego the size of Atlantis(most), and a few 'longings'(few). If the girl can't tolerate the guy's behaviours, and if the guy can't stand the girl's characteristics, thats when the fetus of problems starts forming.

Most marriages in US are love marriages. And then again... US has the highest divorce rate... speak any sense?
The thing isnt falling in love, its about who you fall in love with. And in this generation, its LIVING HELL to find out someone's real personality.

WHEREAS, in arranged matrimony, both girl and guy are aware of their own requirements and the requirements of the partner. This way, they know what they should, and should not expect.
of course, arranged marriages are not 100% succesful. And for some, it ruins their life. But if you have a pretty good 68% chance of getting a good spouse to grow to love, your life is made.

Its like Bani and Jay Walia in Kasam Se. Bani loved Pushkar before, but then after she sees the softy in Jay, she realizes that she never knew Pushkar well enough to love him, and it was probably just infratuation. Its like that

So here, love=48%, marriage=48%... with marriage, you can NOT hit 100%.