Eenie Meenie Miney Moo'hogayi Fix
Shipra: "Priya'kya kaar rahi hai'uthja'12 baj gayeh!"
Priya: "toh kya maa'aaj classes nahi hai'sowne toh doh."
Shipra pulls off the bed cover and then seeing that Priya was still wearing clothes from last night, "Chee'Priya'phir se'kya phir se gande kapre pehenke sow gayi."
Priya covers her face with the pillow: Maa go away, aur kapre gande nahi hai'meine sirf do gante hi pehne the. Now buzz off maa.
Shipra stood with her hands on her hips glaring at her daughter and shaking her head. "Priya uth jaa'beauty parlour mein jana hai'bhul gayi'aaaj tere sasurwale anne wali hai. Kaam se kaam Mr Kapoor ke liye toh kuch apne pe kuch dhyan denah."
Priya throws pillow away and sits up, her face screwed up with anger, "Maa'Mr Kapoor aur mei yeh shadi sift Kartik aur Natasha ki liye kar rahe hai. Yeh love match nahi hai'ek samjota hai'tumari khushi aur Mrs Niharika ki khusi ki liye."
Shipra smacks her hand on her head. "Hai bappa yeh larki'kya lata Priya tujhe ke mei tumare sumjaute se khush hoon'aur tumare papa'hum soch rahe the ke tujhe Mr Kapoor pasand hai'"
Priya blows air out through pursed lips, "Maa'Mr Kapoor bahut handsome hai'par mota hai. Aur usse mineral water peene ki adat hai'aur usse har cheez perfectly set hone chahiyeh'aur mei'dekho yeh mera kamra'meri aur Ayesha ki cheese har kone mei rakhi hai'aur mei nal ka panni peti hoon aur mei ek simple aur seedhi larki hoon'toh batao Mr Kapoor kyun mujhse saadi kare'mera boutiful thobda dekh kar?"
Shipra screams, "Haye'Ram akaal do iss larki ko!"
Sudhir walks in with two cups of two, smiling at Priya. "Good afternoon beta. Coffee?" He holds a cup out. Shipra watches with a scowl on her face. "Lei agya tera baap coffee leke. Aree Sudhir'kehdo usse'ready hojayeh'meine beauty parlour mei appointment book ki hai."
Sudhir winks at Priya, "Chalo Priya'get ready'mamma ko beauty parlour mei lejana hai'aaj Mrs Niharika Kapoor ko impress karna hai nah!"
Shipra picks up the pillow and flings it at Sudhir, missing him by a foot. Sudhir and Priya burst out laughing. "Papa you are bad."
Sudhir grins, "Haan pata hai'par tere ser toh nahi kah rahi. Priya..ek baat kahoon'mujhe pata hai Shipra ki kuch adaate buri hai paar uska dil nahi bura'chali jaa beauty parlour pe uski saath'usko dil khush hojayega."
Priya gets up and gives her dad a quick a hug. "mamma is lucky you know."
Sudhir just smiles and pats Priya's head.
XXX
Seven o'clock in the evening'
Ram jabs at the lift button once more and swears. Vikram nudges him, "Chal nah Ram'stairs se chale jaate hain."
Niharika sniggers, "Ram aadat dal de'teri sasural pe lift nahi chalti'seediyaan charne parti hain."
Ram flashes a mean smile at Vikram. "Chaliyeh'" He leads the way up the stairs, on reaching second floor he wheezes for breath. Vikram puts his arm around Ram, "Yaar teri pills toh laya hain na saath."
Ram nods, taking shallow breaths, "Haan'lani hi parti'madam ne phone pe bata diya ki 64 seediyaan hai'"
Vikram, "Oh not bad'meine toh 100 soch raha tha."
Niharika, pats Ram on the cheek, "Come on beta'three more flights."
Ram throws growls in frustration.
Sudhir opens the door on hearing the doorbell. He smiles, "Welcome'Mr Kapoor'.Welcome Niharikaji'welcome everyone."
Shipra rushes up and wraps Niharika in a tight hug. Niharika shudders at the overpowering scent of the perfume. Shipra gives a coy smile to Ram, "Welcome beta'how are you?"
Ram forces a smile, "Fine auntie'how are you?"
Shipra giggles, "Fine'very fine. Peelease'come'sit'" She pinches Natasha's cheek, "Oh my gudiyaan'you look bootiful.' Natasha deliberately steps on Shipra's toe.
"ouch'" Shipra steps away. "Oh sorry auntie." Natasha makes a sorry face.
Shipra hurriedly, "Oh no beta'kuch nahi'yeh toh hota haina'choti accident."
Priya comes out with a tray. Ram takes a double look. What did she do to her face? He thinks'face paint kiya hai kya. And her eyes'what is that black thing around her eyes? He nudges Vikram and hisses, "Am I seeing things? Has Priya plastered her face with makeup?"
Vikram stares at Priya's face and notices it is made up, but it is not bad. "Haan'not bad. I think she looks quiet nice."
"What! She looks like a clown. It doesn't suit her. I like her the way she is'without that muck on her face" Ram snaps. Priya hears this and smiles to herself. Thank god'beauty parlour ka karcha toh nahi karna parega.
Priya holds a tray of glasses in front of Ram and says softly, "Mineral water hai'aur glasses meine personally polish kiye hai'absolutely germ free."
Ram takes a glass and says grumpily, "Thanks."
"Thanks papa ko kehna'who lei aye mineral water."
Vikram smiles and takes a glass of juice. "I will take the juice Priya'I am immune to germs."
They both giggle while Ram makes angry face at Vikram.
Niharika pulls a piece of paper out which has a list of date that the family pandit gave her. She gives it to Shipra, "Shipraji'yeh wedding ki dates hai'aap dekhiyeh'kayi dates aapko theek lagti hai."
Shipra looks at the dates and then gives a look at Sudhir, "Aap woh hamare panditji ne dates di thi who paper leao."
Sudhir brings the paper, "Niharikaji'yeh kuch garbar hai'hamari dates aur aapki dates kuch match nahi hai'aapne pandit ko Priya aur Ram ki kundliyaan di thi nah?"
Niharika arches her brow, "Of course'let me see." She snatches the two pieces of paper and then shakes her head, "I think'meri matlab se 'aap hamare pandit ki dates se hi chunno."
Shipra frowns, "Kyun'mei hamari pandit ki diyeh dates se hi yeh shadi fix karni hai." Both women have a staring match.
Vikram nudges Ram who was busy looking at the floor, "Ram'lagta hai'yahaan Mahabharat shuru hone wala hai."
"What! What did you say?" Ram looks at Vikram.
"Your mother aur sasu'shadi ki dates pe disagreement chal rahi hai."
Ram eyes moves towards Niharika and Shipra and sees both are throwing daggers at each other. "Maa'" he calls out.
Niharika gets upset at having to look away, "Haan Ram."
"Maa can I have a look at the dates'let me tell you which is suitable."
Niharika hands her paper over. Shipra jumps up, "Mr Kapoor yeh bhi dekho'yeh hamari dates hai."
Ram searches for Priya, finds her standing by the window. He tries to catch her attention. When he fails, he coughs. Sudhir instantly calls out, "Priya beta'pani leiaa Mr Kapoor ke liye."
Priya smiles, "Papa, pani ka glass uske haath mei hi hai." She then looks at Ram, who smiles and waves the paper at her, "Do you mind'please'meri saath yeh shadi ki dates'cough'please."
"Oh'" Priya walks upto him, "Hmmm let me see." She tugs at the paper in Ram's hand. Ram doesn't let go. "please'mujhe bhi dekhni hai'Vikram'what days am I free?'
Vikram pulls out his Blackberry, punches some keys, "This week you are free this Friday evening. Nothing for next two weeks'conference in Bangalore and Pune at weekends. The weekafter'oh'free on Wednesday'I mean no meetings or anything'you can skip office that day."
Ram feels embarrassed, "Leave it'let me do this the easy way'Priya'do you mind'aap ki koi appointments hai joh aap cancel nahi kar pati."
Priya purses her lips, "Haan'two weeks ki notice dene paregi'Dean ko'weekends free hai."
"Ok then let me see, dates after two weeks'here we go'eenie'meenie'miney'moh'" Priya and Vikram sniggers while Shipra wears a shocked look. Ram closes his eyes, "This one'" Opens his eyes, "August 9th'fixed and final." He arches his brow at Priya, who shrugs her shoulders. "Maa'August 9th'Auntie'ok with you?"
Shipra looks at Sudhir'looks at Priya'looks at Vikram'looks at Niharika and then says quietly, "OK'chalega'koi aur ko problem nahi hai toh mujhe kyun."
Sudhir claps, "Very good, August 9th'Priya'beta go and get the matki with the kulfi'lets celebrate. Ram'aapko kulfi pasand hai'meri Priya ki favourite hai."
Ram feels his stomach protest, kulfi'and that too'those sold by road in those matki. He feels like puking. Vikram slaps Ram on the back, "Uncle'Ram ki bhi favourite hai'pata hai'koi baar toh raat ke baara baje hum kulfi khaane nikal parte hai."
Ram feels like punching his friend in the stomach, saala'ulta seedha bol deta hai'
Priya comes with a tray and plates holding malai and pista kulfis. She stops in front of Ram first. Ram hesistates. Priya says quietly, "Please'mera papa ki khatir'" Ram takes a plate and stares at the kulfi that is already starting to melt. Vikram takes two plates, "I will have two'aaj bahut garmi hain."
Everyone is eating kulfi, except Ram'he just cannot pick up the soft mush and shove it in his mouth. He stares at Priya, who is perched on a stool by the window, licking the kulfi'her pink tongue darting around the kulfi. He feels a chill running down his spine, what else am I going to have to put up with?
Vikram pokes Ram, "If you don't want that kulfi'can I?" Ram darts a quick glance but Priya is too busy licking her kulfi. Ram grabs Vikram's empty plate and shoves his into Vikram's hand and then sits back and lets out a deep breath. A smug smile forms on his face as he sits and watches Vikrma lapping up his kulfi.
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