Perfection lies in imperfection - 22 June

Posted: 12 years ago
Hmmm, so I was debating whether or not to post a topic today because I had read that today's episode was fairly blah...

I'm going to skip right over that first Nuts scene because...well, you know. 

Coming to the heart of the matter, a few interesting dilemmas and thoughts popped into my head while watching the Vineet-Priya track. Apologies for the slightly whimsical approach to this post - there's not much in the episode that I wanted to talk about save one or two scenes, but there are some concepts that I was keen to explore. 

Now, we know that Ram is the man Priya will marry, so we know that Vineet mein koi na koi khot zaroor hoga. Otherwise such a seemingly perfect man even Priya will not reject last minute. 

But suppose this was not a love story between Ram and Priya. Suppose this was simply a story about Priya finding the right guy for her, and there was no Ram involved. Would Vineet fit  the bill? He said all the right things; in fact he said all the things before Priya could say them, before she even got a word in edgeways. But is that enough? Is saying - or even believing - the right things enough? Could Vineet be the right man for Priya? I am the kind of person that believes in the dictum "if it's too good to be true, it's probably false". I think that life would be extremely boring if we all were the "perfect" people - never fight, never argue, never have a differing opinion etc. Chalo no drinking no smoking is fine...many people abstain from those things. Those are not the things that make a person interesting. But can two people be truly, completely, deeply happy when there is absolutely NO conflict of any sort? I am not so sure. 

The things that we all love about Ram are that he is NOT perfect; by no means. He is often rude, snobbish, a control freak and has a weird thing about cleanliness. He doesn't like rain, or traffic, or time wasters. But he is sweet, and awkward, and protective. He knows how to apologise, how to tease, how to be teased. He is vulnerable, sad, lonely. He is ruthless in business, decisive and determined. He is all of these things, and yet he is not perfect. 

Who would you rather pick? Forgetting the "RaYa" element, just purely on the basis of a deeper question - who would YOU pick? The non-confrontational guy who says all the right things, never argues with you and agrees to let you live your life exactly the way you want it? Or the guy who most probably will agree with you only 50% of the time, will argue and fight his corner, will  make you laugh, and cry, and love and hate? I know which I would choose. 

Priya is very perceptive. Her hesitation towards Vineet was not due to her leaning towards Ram; I don't think she has yet leant towards him in that way, and neither has he with her. Her hesitation towards Vineet was based solely on him and her reaction towards him. She was blind-sided from the moments she stepped into the house, and confused by her own inertia and her own non-reaction to him. Here is a guy who is pushing all the right buttons, saying all the right things, giving me everything I want. Why am I still not sure?

This is a common dilemma for women, I believe. The "good guy-bad boy" syndrome. Ram is not a "bad boy", but in comparison, Vineet is practically a saint. But he's vanilla. And Ram is swirling chocolate, and pecan, and brandy and all the nice and naughty things. (And here I make myself hungry πŸ˜†). It is endlessly fascinating to me how women - myself included - are almost always drawn to the guy who is slightly "unsafe", or who makes us react in some extreme way, good or bad. Or a guy who challenges us. The so-called good guy who doesn't have any bad qualities can make for a very boring life partner. This is why I don't like mahaan characters - they are too good, and always right. How do you argue with someone like that? Life is grey, not black and white. I have always identified with the grey-ish characters more than those who do no wrong. 

Of course, since we know that this is a show about RP, and since we suspect that Ram had sent this guy (as evidenced by his remark "Priya's liked him" in the boardroom), we know that something will happen tomorrow to break off this so-called rishta. What, I don't know. But isn't it strange how these things work? Her entire family is singing this guy's praises, and though Priya acknowledges that he seems to be perfect...uska dil nahin maanta. Her gut instincts, her perception, these are all warning her that this is not the way to go. We all have this gut instinct; the problem arises when we fail to understand it. I hope Priya does not fail to understand it, 

Despite all their fighting, their misunderstandings, the way they get so hyper around each other...indeed, probably because of all these things, there is a spark between Ram and Priya. In the precap when they show Ram come and stand behind Priya as she faces out towards the rain...you get a jolt of excitement, a sense of rightness. There is this...chamak that surrounds them when they are together, this bubble of light and sparkles. Life picks up pace a little more, the world is brighter, more vibrant; sounds are louder. Even I can see this - from this side of the screen. I don't know how they do it. There is not a SINGLE word spoken in that precap. But that precap is more exciting to me than anything I have seen today. It's a little thing called magic. And, of course, it's "meta-magic". We, the audience, see and feel the magic but also, don't Priya and Ram also feel that magic within the confines of the show? Isn't that why they get so animated around each other? 

As much of a romantic as I am, I would love to believe in the concept of soulmates. Unfortunately, the other half of me is a major cynic. I believe in soulmates, but I don't think they exist in today's real life. Or do they? Does anyone here have stories of their own to share - of their loved ones and other halves? Is there magic in your lives? Is the world a brighter place because you made the right, instinctive choice? Or do you believe that there is no such thing as the "right" choice, only the practical one? Do you think that a person can make themselves love anyone, fit in with anyone, make a home and a family with anyone?
Posted: 12 years ago
ur second to last paragraph about the precap being the most exciting part of the show.. i can't agree more πŸ˜³πŸ˜³ as much as i enjoyed the show.. and agree with the fact that this guy's a little too good for priya.. the precap had me grinning ear to ear.. 


no words need to be spoken.. they're meant to be.. 
Posted: 12 years ago
Originally posted by psawyer



Despite all their fighting, their misunderstandings, the way they get so hyper around each other...indeed, probably because of all these things, there is a spark between Ram and Priya. In the precap when they show Ram come and stand behind Priya as she faces out towards the rain...you get a jolt of excitement, a sense of rightness. There is this...chamak that surrounds them when they are together, this bubble of light and sparkles. Life picks up pace a little more, the world is brighter, more vibrant; sounds are louder. Even I can see this - from this side of the screen. I don't know how they do it. There is not a SINGLE word spoken in that precap. But that precap is more exciting to me than anything I have seen today. It's a little thing called magic. And, of course, it's "meta-magic". We, the audience, see and feel the magic but also, don't Priya and Ram also feel that magic within the confines of the show? Isn't that why they get so animated around each other? 




LOVEEE how you worded this, Vas😍  The precap was the best part of the epi to me as well...not a single word but there is MAGIC when these two are in the same frame together!😍...the sense of rightness as you said...


As for the question you posed, I think there is no standard answer either ways...it doesn't have to be just a good boy v/s bad boy thing...the reason that guy...Vineet(?) was giving off odd vibes was cuz he was trying a little too hard to be perfect...and while you can't know who THE ONE is off of basic behavior patterns...there is such a thing as connection...and connection doesn't have to be sparks flying all over the place instantly...but something to build up on...it's not about somebody giving all the right answers and having all the same interests as you...it's about you feeling that TRUST in someone...just SOME kind of trust to start with...which is what Priya once mentioned to her father during their talks as well...and I loved how she said that...

In the context of this show, yes there is some kind of spark b/w R and P...but it's on a subconscious level that they both probably don't see or recognize...given the circumstances that have pushed them together...To bring out my own romantic/whimsical streak here, destiny makes them meet even if they feel they don't want to see each other...and each time they meet, they discover something about each other...slowly and subtly...but NOW they won't dwell on it...one day they'll look back and laugh at it...As for how much that happens in real life...who can really sayπŸ˜†
Edited by nureat01 - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago
@Vasu: Loved today's post. As usual, you nailed it, the entire point of today's episode was to show Priya's conflict over the "perfect" man.
 
Everything else is just moving the plot forward.
 
 
As someone who doesn't believe in soulmates even inside the realm of  tv shows, with the blaring music and slow motion effects, I really like your analysis of the type of choices people have to face when choosing a life partner.
 
Like you said, there is going to be a problem with Mr. Perfect. Most likely, he was paid by Ram to be Mr. Perfect, bribed with that job he seems to always have wanted. But, how much more interesting would it be if there isn't a problem. If Mr. Perfect is truly perfect. He is the guy that Priya is looking for. And she still doesn't want him. Not because she wants Ram (I am really happy that this thought has not occured to anyone, but Niharika is like only one gossipy society matron away) but because she does not want Mr. Perfect, for all those reasons you mentioned. Lack of challenge, lack of conflict, lack of growth. How does someone perfect grow anyway? And isn't one of the best parts about loving someone(not necessarily romantically) watching them grow and change, and realizing that you love "crayon breaky" Willow and "scary veiny" Willow and all the stuff in the middle.
 
I don't know why the rishta will break off tomorrow. It might be because Mr. Perfect(whose name I haven't made the effort to learn) might be paid by Ram, he might be rejected by Priya, or he might be the cofounder of the klepto group of unrequired comic releif with the crazy uncle. But I do applaud Priya for instinctively realizing that something is wrong, this is NOT the guy for her, however perfect he is.
 
Little notes:
 
If Mr. Perfect was indeed molded by Ram, it does seem to show that Ram knows Priya pretty well. But it would mean that Ram was as manipulative as his mother, which seems to go against his character.
 
I have officially let go of the idea that Nuts is clinically insane. She is now just a spoilt little brat who has lived a consequence free life. Also, one who apparently feels no physical pain.
 
Is it me or did i detect a subtle irony in the scene when Niharika says don't mess with Ram's private life? Or am I giving thhe writing staff too much credit?
Posted: 12 years ago
i think this person has been sent by ram and ram has given him bribe he will give him everything if he will get merry to priya.
Posted: 12 years ago
Why is kartik in love with nuts? I mean are they trying to say that opposites attract or love is blind. The first 5-7 minutes were πŸ˜”. 
Now coming to the main part. Priya seemed very uncomfortable yesterday as well as today.. Was it because she never expected a good proposal to come her way? Whether she shows it or not she seemed to be caught off guard.. its like you know this was going to happen but when it happened i was not sure if this is what i wanted.. ( i hope i am making sense).. it's an ekta serial so you can be sure to find extremists here.. Be it natasha or Vineet.. For some relief i wanted a good guy to come in the form of this proposal. i was bored with the normal widow-divorced men track.. Now that he came it made me wonder?

Vineet seemed a nice guy. Atleast he showed some respect towards her independence and education but is that enough? For me if someone is so good i try to dig deep and find out why is he being so nice.. i don't like people who are  sugar coated.. There may be some who are genuinely nice but you cant trust anyone instantly... This guy seemed too good to be true.. Living with him under one roof would be like living in a convent...  Priya wanted to hear all that he said but she is not sure whether its from the right person.. 

The precap: Now this is what i call spark.. I dont know whether its this pair or because we know they are going to end up together but i felt something deep.. On one hand we have vineet who verbally expressed his desire and on the other  we have RP near the window,no words spoken and my heart skipped a beat.. This is romance..Like you said i too want to believe in soul mates (blame it on mills and boonπŸ˜†) but dont know if they exist.. 
Posted: 12 years ago

They say sometimes that when things are too good to be true, then they probably are. Priya's hesitation was a natural instinct. I get that too, when things are going smoothly, I always wonder when there's going to be an impediment in the path. Maybe Priya just cannot believe that someone so perfect can enter her life or I personally think that there was this voice inside her which was not allowing her to accept Mr Perfect.

The precap was truly magical, no words spoken by Ram and Priya and yet, I am looking forward to today's episode. The rain just added to the magic.
 
I'm not sure about soulmates, in fact, to be honest, I don't believe in them. 2 people can fall in love and live happily together or they could end up in an unhappy marriage. Same with arranged marriages too.
 
I truly believe that for a marriage to be successful, both should be able to adjust, compromise to an extent and put that thing called as ego into a locked box. This may not sound romantic, but whether its a love or arranged marriage, if he or she is someone who is worth being with, if the good qualities outweigh any negative traits, then words like adjustment, compromise and putting away ego don't appear to be a punishment.
 
 
Posted: 12 years ago
Vasu again crisp and to the point analysis.
 
She was blind-sided from the moments she stepped into the house, and confused by her own inertia and her own non-reaction to him. Here is a guy who is pushing all the right buttons, saying all the right things, giving me everything I want. Why am I still not sure?
 
 I like this part of your voicing your concern. Yes its very true; if  someone is so perfect and compliment all your thoughts, saying the right words and feels, how come there is always that Xfactor lurking deep inside one that says;"Wait is he the real one for you? think again?"
 
I guess Priya too must have felt something like this and deep inside her heart it hasnt clicked or that ganti nahi baghi".
 
In real life too the man or woman for one, is always imperfectly perfect. Thats the charm and beauty of life.
 
BTW I like the way Ram waddles slowly behind Priya in the precap. Its always reminding me of Elephant!!πŸ˜‰πŸ˜ƒ  
Posted: 12 years ago
That is such a beautiful post. Lovely analysis, and I am haazir to talk to you about soulmates and finding the perfect partner. Just not right now, as getting ready for a meeting, will be back in a few hours.

Oh and for the curious, yes, I do believe in soulmates. I have found mine, and he makes me angry, laugh, cry, love him so much. More later.
Posted: 12 years ago
I just realized on rewatching the precap...Ram is actually SMILING looking at the rain too!πŸ˜²πŸ˜†...Or is it just the magic of Priya's company? :P

They both look sooo adorableee! I can't stop gushing over this precapπŸ˜†

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