OS: Making Up

I enjoyed yesterday's episode since we had Angry MSK back. But after a while I felt really sad. My heart went out to Geet. She has hardly started behaving like his equal and he will again put her down. I know that the CVs are going to resolve it with red dress and all that. But I would really have liked it to be resolved with a conversation.

Since my mind was not at peace, as I felt sad, I wrote this. Feeling better now 😊 Probably, some of your will feel the same.

--

What had she done? She hurt him? His pride? His prestige?

Yes - it was not intentional, but she still ended up doing it. How could this happen, when she claims to know him so well, when he himself has this faith on her that she knows him more than he knows himself.

At that moment, it did not matter to her that the whole incident was triggered because of his prank. He was the one who was embarrassing her in front of every one by holding her hand. But when she exposed him, it probably went out of hands. He could not take all the leg pulling. And then in the office. She was hurting badly when he was telling her all that. That she needs to keep their private moments private. 

But right now, it wasn't her self-respect or hurt that mattered. How could it? He was the person who taught her how to live with self-respect. He was the one who healed all her hurt. And she had hurt him. He had put up with so much for her. He had put up with all her naivety and mistakes and still loved her to death. How far had she gone this time that he was hurt by her behaviour?

That was the only thing that mattered. He was hurt. How could she make amend?. He was so angry, that she was unable to gather courage to go and say 'Sorry'. What if a 'Sorry' was inadequate!

--

As he sat in his cabin alone for a while, his anger started cooling off. And that's when he realized what had he done. 

Why did he talk to her like that? Couldn't he see the hurt in her eyes, when he told her that he would not even touch her. And when he told her that he would no longer listen to her. And when he shouted at her in the office.

This was the woman who had taught him how to smile, how to let go of worries. How could he rob her of her smile! The smile that she managed to keep even when she was going through hell in her life, through the death threats by her own family, through the social stigma of becoming a single mother, through the days of financial insecurities, through all her loneliness. And he robbed her of that smile, which had sustained her all her life. And which now sustained him too.

This was the woman who trusted him blindly. She even waited for the snow in Delhi, because he asked her to. Why did he have to be so harsh with her? What had come upon him? If he wanted her to behave differently all he had to do was ask her. Yes, she blabbered non-stop in front of him, she fought with him in a way nobody dared to, she made fun of him, but none of it came in the way of her true feelings for him. The true feelings, with which she practically worshipped him. Did she ever really say "No" to anything he asked her for? She did not. She could not! What should he do? Go to her cabin and say 'Sorry'? What if a 'Sorry' was inadequate?

--

He could not decide what to do. The day was filled with meetings, because he wanted to finish off as much work as possible before they took leave for their wedding. Meetings that she scheduled because he had asked her to. Even this simple thought made his heart ache. He only had to ask her. Why did he shout at her and utter those hurtful words!

The last meeting ran till 7 pm. He came back hurriedly from the conference room. He would take her home and talk to her. Do whatever he can to heal her wounds. But she was not in the cabin. Pinki was still there, packing her things up to leave for the day. He asked her. Geet had left at 6 pm. She looked unwell, but she did not say anything when Pinki asked her. 

Unwell? Maan almost cried. What happened? Why did she not tell him?

--

She was facing away from the door, leaning on the rod of the bed. He could hear muffled sounds while standing at the door. What was she doing?

He tip-toed to go and face her. She did not realize he was there. What he saw there broke his heart. Her eyes were closed, as if she was trying to control her tears. But they were uncontrollable. They were flowing through her closed eyes. She was biting her lips to not let a sound escape. But he still had been able to hear them at the door itself.

His hands naturally moved to wipe her tears. But he suddenly remembered what he had said in the morning. He will not touch her till their wedding. Not that he cared any longer about that. But he wasn't sure what she thought of it. How will she take it if he touched her. It took him all his self-control, but he decided to hold back for the time being.

Then he slowly called her, "Geet!"

He could see surprise on her crying face. She did not open her eyes immediately. She wiped her tears with her fingers. And then opened her eyes. She was still biting her lips.

He had to read her lips as she tried to say, "Aap?" She had such a heavy throat due to her crying that the voice did not come out.

He looked around and found a jug of water on the side-table. He poured her a glass of water. She took the glass from him, but did not drink. She kept looking at him with eyes whose expressions killed him. Why was she looking so guilty? He was the one who should be guilty?

"Geet! Pinki ne kaha ki tumhari tabiyat theek nahin hai. Kya hua Geet?"

She drank the water now to find her voice back.

"Nahin. Maine to aisa kuchh nahin kaha tha use. Main bilkul theek hoon. Koi ghabrane ki baat nahin hai."

'Woh itna gussa hain. Phir bhi meri tabiyat kharab hone ke dar se bhagte chale aaye,' she thought and felt even worse.

"Kya aap mujhe maaf kar sakte hain?"

"Geet..." Maan grew emotional.

"Mujhe pata hai, mujhse bahut badee galti ho gayi hai. Lekin mera yakeen maaniye, main aapki insult karne ki soch bhi nahin sakti. Ek baar maine aapko galat samajha tha Maan, aur uske liye main itna pachhtayi hoon ki galti se bhi aapki baaton ko mana nahin kar sakti. Please mujhe maaf kar dijiye. Maine anjaane mein aapka dil dukha diya."

Maan's guilt increased a thousand folds as he heard her repeating what he already knew. She would always do what he asked her to.

"Chup Geet. Bilkul chup," he had said this so many times earlier. But this time he did not put his hands on her lips with authority. His own words uttered in the morning were biting him.

"Geet. Tum please apne aap ko zimmedar thahrana band karo. Galti meri thi Geet. Mujhe tumhare oopar gussa nahin karna chahiye tha. Main bhi to jaanta hoon ki tum meri har baat maanti ho, mujhe tum par chillane ki koi zaroorat nahin hai. Main gusse mein apna aapa kho baitha Geet. Subah bhi meri hi galti thi. Mujhe tumhein sab ke saamne pareshaan nahin karna chahiye tha. Main sirf tumhein lekar hi possessive nahin hoon Geet. Main apni is chhoti si duniya ko lekar bhi bahut possessive hoon, jo sirf hum dono ki hai. Ye main kissi ke saath share nahin kar sakta. Lekin in sabke beech maine tumhein bahut pareshaan kiya Geet, aur woh bhi bewajah. I am sorry. Please mujhe maaf kar do."

That was it. Everything was resolved between them. This was how it was meant to be. She moved towards him, but suddenly stopped. His words in the morning... Did he still mean them? He saw her hesitation and spread his arms inviting her. She came to him immediately. As they stood there in each other's arms, where they really belonged, a calmness descended upon them. The calmness that was theirs, but had eluded them the entire day, thanks to a silly fight.