DARK KNIGHT- A SwaSan FF- DELETED- AN- PAGE 1- PLS READ - Page 25

Originally posted by: Javeria3991

awesome update

it has begin, revenge for sanskar, sacrife for swara, indifference for ragini and stubborness for laksh.

I am eager to know how the unfold now.

Originally posted by: bones123

Absolutely loved Chapter 4.

I like the whole Sujata Annapurna and the equation they have with the other's child angle. Reading through your story, its as if the other mother has yielded a greater influence on personality of the princes. Be it bratty and whimsical, or strong yet unyielding and focussed. Very well etched.

"I shared my house, my baba" ha...Ragini (even though the show doesn't do enough justice to explore the many layers she could have) is generally self victimised and believes she's owed many priveleges. Would love to see how you take that further.

As for Sanskaar...what a royal presence indeed. The effect Swara has on him transcends the equations he has in his other relationships. It's beautiful that Swara is able to discern that something is amiss and looks to find more in those eyes, somethign which his mother has been fooled by. I really liked how well you've spun the magnetic pull they feel even if at this stage it is not realised or apparent to either. How he'll feel in the future to his decision of sacrificing her as collateral damage will be great to read *if you intend to take the story in that direction*

Kudos for this...i repeat...super stuff !!

Originally posted by: Niyatiswaragini

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Shruti wat can I write about ur updates, they always come up with package of awesomeness, every time making me to praise u more n more over your brilliant command of language. Wow!! I have a notebook full of quotes , this quote is there. One among my favorite quotes.

I would say that this reaction was all wat I expected from the immature prince , he has nothing to do with the feelings of the poor princess ragini, whatever it might be here too he will be the reason for ragini turning against swara. Rana do had head so y not to strictly deny this offer, let him commit suicide, but ya being a father, his emotional corner starts tearing wen comes to son. Fine but Samar has all the rights to protest wen his daughter is not willing to marry that weird prince. Ragini's words were wrong instead of blaming laksh , she was criticizing swara grow up girl she is the same girl who for ur sake is dening such mind bobling offer, any way swara seems to be sensitive enough to connect with ragini's sadist side. Omg now real threat is coming in from the actual hero, the sanskar, gosh this is going to be really waiting wat he will do.

Historical element of this chapter I would like to mention is the one that women are often sacrificed for the sake of the family and kingdom. I mean how easy is that for any father to just let her daughter be in hell or heaven no matter to him as in the just is all worried about his kingdom, here it is being shekar who sacrificed swara's dignity and ragini's emotions for baadigunj. How unfair is that. This reminds me situation of heer kunwar (popularly known as jodha bai) who just for sake for kingdom was given I would like to use the term mortgage for this , to the mughals , phew sorry for taking this comment to another levels but I was taken away.

Please update asap shruti neva forget one reader is always at her peak for ur updates.

Lots and lots of love

Niyati

🤗

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

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So here we had the spoilt brat princeling taking a stand, asking for a toy that had suddenly caught his fancy. 🤢 And, shallow and impetuous as he was, much he had been displaying signs of being drawn to the external friendliness and liveliness of Swara's nature (being way too indolent to plumb further into either her psyche and insecurities, or for that matter, of his actual intended, Ragini). However, the fact that he chose to take this stand immediately after literally ogling Swara when she was drenched in the jets of the water fountain seems---I don't know---somewhat perverse. 🤢 Probably it has to do with your portrayal of him as being literally at the shallow end of the pool--intellect wise, emotion wise, capability wise!! 😉 All water related puns intended!! 😆

This part of Lakshya taking a stand of breaking his engagement with Ragini, and then insisting that he would not marry anyone else if he couldn't marry Swara, the scene he created, was similar to the serial yet deftly modified to suit your setting. 👏 But the entire way he went about it, Shru--the entitlement complex ridden, juvenile, brattish route of asking for a toy: Give me this or else I shall yell at the top of my lungs and roll on the floor in public!!---It is too much at odds with the person who connived against Sanskaar. I just cannot believe it was Lakshya...and I am sure you will not put him as that person, ultimately. 😃 I noticed you studiously avoided 😉 answering my query in my last comment: what did Kavita mean in that dialogue to Sanskaar in Chap 3, where she refers to some past misunderstanding with Lakshya? Had he set his cap on her as well? Did Lakshya think that Kavita was leading him on for a time? Do tell na, Shru. 😛 And why, Oh why, do I have this feeling that Madame Kavita is very much alive and kicking, probably happily the mistress of someone else? 🤢

I really liked the family dynamics you portrayed of both the Maheshwaris and the Gadodias. Ram Prasad---always kingmaker, never King! 😉 Ram must be seriously grateful to you, Saku and me for giving him such space in our works, much more than the serial ever affords him! 😆 And he did manage to persuade his revered elder brother, with his quiet logic...

I really wondered at the barb Annapurna aimed at Durga Prasad---about how the Maheshwari men always fell for the wrong women--a fatal, inherited flaw! So did Durga Prasad have a dalliance with Kaveri in the past? 😕 Good Lord, was Kavita his illegitimate daughter? 🤢

As for the Gadodias-- Janaki and Sharmishta as Draupadi and Subhadra. 😃 The Mahabharata reference made me absolutely rejoice, as you, I am sure, knew it would! 😉 That entire touch was very deftly handled: Ragini's sorrow and intense rage at having to give up her intended to her half sister, when she has already had to share so much with her throughout her life---her father's love, even her mother's attention, her status as the only/ preferred child...The accumulated resentments, well masked as they were, would have served even to tear apart full siblings, and here, they are, after all, only half sisters...
I also liked how Ragini sobs in Sharmishta's arms and seeks reassurance from her step mother; while Janki, in turn, persuades her step daughter to accede to the Maheshwari's changed choice of her as Lakshya's intended bride. Nice touch, continuing the description from the earlier chapter.

And to end it all, Sanskaar, watching and listening to the hurried, panicked murmurs all through the castle, his pretend madness allowing people to gossip freely in his presence. Somehow I thought, after Chap 3, that he would have some more qualms about Swara being collateral damage--"burning in the pyre" as he puts it--for the kindling he is about to light! He has judged that Ragini is well primed for that judicious spark from his side, and she will burn down all he wanted to destroy, especially Lakshya. He definitely wishes he did not have to harm Swara, but I guess moving from that thought to actually wanting to shield her, is still a way off---though somehow, as I said, after Chap 3, I felt the moment might well be nigh.

Well, I guess he has held that bitter memory of what he imagines as his dear love being snatched from him, of his honor and good name being dragged through the mud, for too long for him to give way to his tender impulses just yet.

Waiting for Chap 5 Shru darling! 🤗