It feels like I have not yet understood Raghunandan- Sita - Page 2

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avalonhigh1234 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#11
I have always thought that marriage like life is amalgamation of all the rides in a carnival...up and down as a ferris wheel, wild like the roller coaster, round and round like carousel...😆.On a serious note it takes a lot of love ,respect and commitment to nurture any relationship and for us Indians it has always been about families. And if we can nurture the vital relationships in our lives with honesty and more importantly without distortions and shadows, then it is a life well lived, isn't it?
Savita
Edited by avalonhigh1234 - 9 years ago
jayvenk thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#12
Savita marriage is a carnival.
For some it is full of fun and the ride is smooth. 😃
Some come of feeling sick after all the rides😕
shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#13
@jayashree you bought a good point about children. I have wondered on this child within a year mentality. To get a degree you have to toil for 20 years , writing exams year after year. To get a job you have to clear test, interview, then undergo training before you are given independent work.
So you need to have some qualification, on top of that some training from experienced people to perform the job in the outside world.
What about the most important job of your life. Parenthood. An exam which you need to give from the time you know the conception has happened for the next 15-16 years. Result which you will get only after say 18 or 20 years when the child is applauded by the society for the values, principles and behavior they possess.
Don't you need any qualification for that. Don't you need the knowledge to set the direction for the child from the time it is in your womb.
Mother the first teacher. How many think of the role as that of a teacher. A selfless, tireless job that needs to be given 100% concentration with focus on action than the result. Because if action is right the result will happen.
But for right action, right knowledge has to be there.
Alas the only 2 jobs that doesn't need any qualification at the emotional level in present day society is that of husband-wife and then mother-father. It is all at the physical level.
jayvenk thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#14
Girls as young as 16 become mothers. They themselves are not fully mature and they bring in another life.
Sad but true shruthi the most important task and one does not need any qualification
avalonhigh1234 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#15
Jayashri ,Life is what we make out of it...it is happiness; it is broken dreams; sometimes it is unfulfilled expectations;,disappointments galore...all of us go through all this at reoccurring points in our lives. This is where our faith in God helps us to cope and eventually win over circumstances. One thing I have learnt is that Iam the only one who can make myself strong and happy...it is an ongoing process...

'Hope' is the thing with feathers"
That perches in the soul"
And sings the tune without the words"
And never stops"at all"

And sweetest"in the Gale"is heard"
And sore must be the storm"
That could abash the little Bird
That kept so many warm"

I've heard it in the chillest land"
And on the strangest Sea"
Yet, never, in Extremity,
It asked a crumb"of Me.
EMILY DICKINSON
Edited by avalonhigh1234 - 9 years ago
daydreamers thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#16
I maybe off beat here...
An inexperienced soul who is talking on marriage and parenthood... 😆 apologies in advance if I offend anyone...

I don't think values can ever be taught... They can't...

Again culture cannot be taught...

Thoughts cannot be taught...

Character cannot be taught...

Values,culture,thoughts can only be imitated...

The only thing parents can teach kids is to acknowledge the ability to think...

They can't even teach kids what is right and wrong...

They can only guide... And guiding and teaching are different things...

Parents can only guide... What really teaches is life and experience...

I believe you yourself are the best teacher...

And for parents to guide, education isn't imp... I laugh hard when ppl equate education and knowledge 😆

I c education as shaastra- the civilization/ sanskriti

And knowledge as gyaan- the nature/ prakriti.

To build a good character, is more or less in hands of the person himself... Parents only need to ensure the values, culture and thoughts they emote.. Coz these three things will be imitated by their kid in future...

How much ever you preach of education, knowledge and blah blah but if you present the above three things negatively forget about the good character that u desire to see in ur children...

This is my experience as a kid and the way my parents have brought me up..

jayvenk thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#17
Savita,, I love poems. ❤️
Yes at the end of the day, it all comes to us , I am responsible.
avalonhigh1234 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#18
Jayashri
The three things that have never failed to lift my spirits have been Faith, literature and art. I have to thank my parents for nurturing it in me and my husband for being supportive whether he gets it or not...I am trying to pass it on to my children...
jayvenk thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#19
Over the years there have been many times I have questioned myself. Am doing the right thing? Sometimes society takes precedence over self😕
Each time I learnt to have faith.
Lit and art . Now a days instead of a book it had become ebooks. Me bad I know. The smell of books can never replace a tab or laptop.

shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#20
@DD you cannot teach, but you can set direction. Whether to take the direction or not is the child's choice. But as a parent what direction I want to set for my child it is in my hands. And that depends on what I want my child to be. And that's a question in itself. What do I want in my child. A doctor, an engineer, a lawyer, social reformer. And the answer I had got in this lines of a Malayalam song.
" Ethu deshamakilum, ethu veshamekilum, ammathan amicha palinte madhuryam kathidename"( Transalation: Literal meaning:Whichever country you are, whatever you are doing, always remember to guard the sweetness of the milk your mother gave you. Deeper meaning: Never do any action that will make your mom bow in front of others)
And to ensure this, the only thing I can do is walk a path, do the actions for the child to take based on my knowledge. Whether the child take it or not, will the child meet my expectations only time will tell.
But that doesn't mean I stop trying or setting the direction for my child. I have to do what is in my control.
One more thing DD as a person I always look for things that is in my control and I don't worry about what is not in my control. For e.g for an exam I can only study, I cannot dictate the questions, I can refer a person for a job, I cannot take test or interview for them. I try to give my best more than 100% to things that are in my control so that I don't feel sad that I have not done enough.
@Savitha Emily Dickinson poem. So good of you to put it here. I also turn to literature and music whenever my spirits are down. And then my faith. Yes I have lot of that.
Edited by shruthiravi - 9 years ago

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