Outburst of Dormant feelings !!

mjtruelegend thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#1
Rano, the younger daughter in law of the 2nd generation of the Kashyap household! Her mother and father in law call her "CHOTI" with affection. She is the wife of their youngest son Alok and the mother of Ishaan and Ishika.

Being the youngest bahu, she has always been in the background, carrying on with her role as the choti bahu. She loves and is in awe of her elder sister in law (jethani) Badi Maa-Shailaja. She calls her Didi, she sees her like her own elder sister and follows her Didi's shadow like a little child. Whatever Didi says, goes!

The elders have loved and cared for her just like their own little daughter. They have kept her out of any problematic situations and have always dealt with things without her participation or even her knowledge. Of course as that is not necessarily a good thing! Especially now that all the children have grown and she has become a mother in law. It is almost like a mockery of her status! If the elders do not show any deliberation then how will the youngsters treat her?

What is she? An ornament for exhibition or just another person merely just existing under the same roof?


They all should take her into consideration, they should listen to her views and they should involve her in all matters because she is a part of the family too!! The family has always treated her as more of a naive and innocent human being because of her lack of worldly ways but that does NOT justify them taking decisions, especially when its about her own children! A mother can never tolerate anyone else taking a stand for her child while she still is alive, no matter WHO that person is.

So Rano's feelings and behaviour now not just a matter of her dislike for her daughter in law's involvement in media, but its a feeling that has been lying dormant for decades! Its just now the patience and the constant neglect has reached its pinnacle.

It true what they say, people never grow up..as in no matter how much we may age, the child in us will be alive and the child inside Rano has woken up. She now wants the attention and she will make sure she gets it! She had been sitting quietly in the back of the classroom (Kashyap's residence) and she has absorbed everything and has obeyed whatever was delegated to her. She tried to speak up but not a single person gives her time or credit. Enough is enough, she cannot withstand this anymore. She must put a voice to her frustrations, her ambiguity, her disillusionment and her misconception! Her outburst was a liberation from the confined and constant lack of attention or respect. Perhaps its the non-participation of Rano, that makes others doubt her ability to judge, comprehend or be decisive!

It is the habitual disregard from the family has damaged her self esteem and confidence. She may be right, but as she hasn't had the opportunity to refine her acumen skills, her actions are usually very inappropriate and wrong! She is not able to keep level headed or think! This is a very real depiction of such characters. Often people loose control and do and say things they don't mean! Shruti Ulfat is doing a grand job in her enactment of Rano. I just hope that the track remains real and normal, true to SGP's nature.
Edited by mjtruelegend - 13 years ago

Created

Last reply

Replies

11

Views

1.5k

Users

6

Likes

30

Frequent Posters

MadameX thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#2

Very beautifully written, Sheemu-sama. Rano is very much a realistic character who hasn't been given enough importance. For the most part, BM has taken the important decisions along with Alok for the household, not really asking so much for an opinion from Rano. Rano, however, has been very nice about this to say the least. She hasn't thrown any tantrums or anything like that. Rather, she also accepted their decisions. However, because of that, it seems that BM and Alok have gotten used to this kind of role from her and assumes it will always be like that. I know they don't mean it but it does happen!! Some people are born leaders and some are born followers. But that doesn't mean that there can't be a role reversal. Rano has just as much right to make decisions. She just chooses not to do so for the most part but only during the important times (ie, things concerning Ishaan and Ishika). So Kashyaps must take her opinions into consideration as well.

Another thing is Alok's attitude towards Rano. He oftentimes cast her problems aside as trivial. I don't think this is because he thinks all her problems are trivial but that his way of thinking is very different from Rano's. He is very open-minded with a lot of things that Rano isn't. For example, he has no issues with Suhana coming home late. His character is quite modern in that Indian society always looks down on women working late hours. So this sort of thing appears trivial to him whereas Rano finds it problematic since she worries about what people would say of Suhana's character and their family. Therefore, to Alok, Rano is "making a big deal out of nothing" and that she should not take concerns over what society says. To Alok, this is backwards thinking but to Rano, this is something she knows people will talk about and she doesn't want anyone in the family to lose face because of it. She is merely being protective. So there's quite a bit of miscommunication between the two due to their different thinking. Personally, Alok should try to understand Rano more. He should also understand that although he and the other Kashyaps are a bit more modern in their ways, it doesn't mean society is going to be accepting. People are going to talk and things can get ugly because strength usually comes in numbers. Society vs Kashyap family, who will win? Definitely society as it is stronger in numbers and hasn't accepted women working late hours. So if Alok puts more effort in understanding where Rano is coming from when she is bawling her eyes out, he can talk to BM about it and share Rano's views. Talking it out will put everyone on the path of solving the problem properly.

If Kashyaps want to prove that Rano is wrong, then they have to ease her frame of mind by showing that what is happening will have no harmful effects (ie, people outside talking negatively about them, media rumors causing distances between Ishaan and Suhana, etc, etc). Otherwise, Rano is right for being upset over these issues and Kashyaps need to listen to her. Once they do listen to her, her outbursts will greatly decrease in frequency and less problems will arise from her outbursts.

shilu999_balani thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#3
beautiful and sensible post Sheemu...now you understand why i put up "poles apart" remark...? your english is remarkable...you have said it all ...and dittoed by my bahu...so at the moment i wont say anything as ive just got up and need my tea to give my brain a jump start...but just to say i always admire and eagerly read your posts...
abhi786 thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 13 years ago
#4
Sheemu... Good post..Rano character is realistic and she obeyed all the decisions takend by BM and Alok...She was happy and accepted the truth and doesn't complain, for not involving her in family decisions. The family understood, particualy BM and Alok thought even though rano initially disagree some matters later will understand, just like in Ishika and Ishaan case...

But in Suhana case, she couldn't and she feels, all are supporting suhana, none are even listening to her even Alok and ishaan... So now she wants her feeling should be considered, and suhana as her DIL should listen to her, rather than BM and others...
infinity00 thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Commentator Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#5
What to say accept instead of reading articles in Guardian , about situation in Syria , Afghanistan and rising cost of living in UK ...I read your post which made Rano,s dilemma much more heart wrenching ( I am God Forbid not comparing the severity of human loss in those places ) ...you have got an art of putting words in sentences which irrespective of the significance of the subject makes it very interesting read and teaches not only wisdom but few new words!! You are very articulate in the way you write, even if one wants to disagree and disagree , feels shame to do so. But on this occasion I fully agree on your portrayal of Rano,s personality. She is our very common mother ...who is not very good in expressing and controlling there emotions . I would really salute Shruti for giving such a marvellous performance , that for one second Rano does not look like a fictional character..and that is the beauty and mastery of a good actor. So good to see her being given a chance to show case her talent which uptil now was only given once or twice. Shruti , Bhairvee and now Ridhima are doing characters which are not given much significance in Sgp over the last year but they did not leave the show and waited for there turn to come and really showed what good actors they can be and what committed professionals they are.
Edited by venture - 13 years ago
566912 thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#6
Sheemu... You definitely have a way with words... Awesome Post... 👍🏼
Ekts -- You said it all girl 😊
Here are my few cents...
Sheemu... I so agree with you n Ekts... sometime the outburst is not only coz of one events or situation... It might be coz of constant neglection or the compromise the person has done over time... 😊
I know someone very close to me... and have observed... coz of lacking to put your point in a convincing manner... ppl around her ignored her or never gave the due credit/importance... which resulted/increased her lack of confidence...😔 this continued for years... and later on She ended up shouting on unnecessory things...😕 which was many a times not appropriate... but when I think closely... the outburst is not coz of present situations but it's coz of years of compromise/negligence... that the frustration is now coming out on every little things...
so, when I read your post... and look at Rano... I easily compared that person with Rano.. Rano's outburst is not coz of one thing... The feelings have been always neglected... She has never been given the due importance in any decision... rather she has always been avoided and later on she had made to accept the decision by convincing her in either ways... 😕
It's not easy to find Rano's good qualities in person in reality who never questions or argues to Jethani and respect/folllow her Jethani in everything... BM wudn't have been the same great BM if Rano wudn't have been there to support her all the while... It's not easy to put someone at front and just follow her without doubting her for years😊 [having said this... I m not against BM but just showing Rano's +ve side/her contribution in Journey of BM in becoming great personality😊]
mjtruelegend thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: MadameX

Very beautifully written, Sheemu-sama. Rano is very much a realistic character who hasn't been given enough importance. For the most part, BM has taken the important decisions along with Alok for the household, not really asking so much for an opinion from Rano. Rano, however, has been very nice about this to say the least. She hasn't thrown any tantrums or anything like that. Rather, she also accepted their decisions. However, because of that, it seems that BM and Alok have gotten used to this kind of role from her and assumes it will always be like that. I know they don't mean it but it does happen!! Some people are born leaders and some are born followers. But that doesn't mean that there can't be a role reversal. Rano has just as much right to make decisions. She just chooses not to do so for the most part but only during the important times (ie, things concerning Ishaan and Ishika). So Kashyaps must take her opinions into consideration as well.

Another thing is Alok's attitude towards Rano. He oftentimes cast her problems aside as trivial. I don't think this is because he thinks all her problems are trivial but that his way of thinking is very different from Rano's. He is very open-minded with a lot of things that Rano isn't. For example, he has no issues with Suhana coming home late. His character is quite modern in that Indian society always looks down on women working late hours. So this sort of thing appears trivial to him whereas Rano finds it problematic since she worries about what people would say of Suhana's character and their family. Therefore, to Alok, Rano is "making a big deal out of nothing" and that she should not take concerns over what society says. To Alok, this is backwards thinking but to Rano, this is something she knows people will talk about and she doesn't want anyone in the family to lose face because of it. She is merely being protective. So there's quite a bit of miscommunication between the two due to their different thinking. Personally, Alok should try to understand Rano more. He should also understand that although he and the other Kashyaps are a bit more modern in their ways, it doesn't mean society is going to be accepting. People are going to talk and things can get ugly because strength usually comes in numbers. Society vs Kashyap family, who will win? Definitely society as it is stronger in numbers and hasn't accepted women working late hours. So if Alok puts more effort in understanding where Rano is coming from when she is bawling her eyes out, he can talk to BM about it and share Rano's views. Talking it out will put everyone on the path of solving the problem properly.

If Kashyaps want to prove that Rano is wrong, then they have to ease her frame of mind by showing that what is happening will have no harmful effects (ie, people outside talking negatively about them, media rumors causing distances between Ishaan and Suhana, etc, etc). Otherwise, Rano is right for being upset over these issues and Kashyaps need to listen to her. Once they do listen to her, her outbursts will greatly decrease in frequency and less problems will arise from her outbursts.



Aray vah vah...kiya baat hain!!👏⭐️ Loved reading your post!! Thankyou for being as sweet as pie!😉

You know I see shades of Rano in most women in my community but at the same time I have not seen anyone to behave the way she does. She wants to be taken seriously but acts carelessly, she wants to be known as mature lady but behaves very immaturely, so what is one to do?😕 How does one help her and how does SHE help herself? People like her can only be happy when they help themselves.

She has been blinded by anger for her action was wrong and she needs to realise that because such inappropriate behaviour only exacerbates the situation and we have seen proof of that more than once!

I think the real reason is the years of volcanic neglect which has finally erupted! So the real people she needs to consult and be talking are all the elders, especially Alok! I really don't like the way he undermines her in every situations. Ok the others don't consider her but what about Alok, why doesn't her think "What about Rano?" SHE IS HIS WIFE!.. They all need to see the bigger picture..Rano needs to widen her horizon too as this is depicting her as more of a narrow minded person who is being very obstinate!

mjtruelegend thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: shilu999_balani

beautiful and sensible post Sheemu...now you understand why i put up "poles apart" remark...? your english is remarkable...you have said it all ...and dittoed by my bahu...so at the moment i wont say anything as ive just got up and need my tea to give my brain a jump start...but just to say i always admire and eagerly read your posts...



Thankyou very much Ma'am. You kind words are very encouraging and uplifting. I hope I don't disappoint you next time. 😊
MadameX thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: mjtruelegend



Aray vah vah...kiya baat hain!!👏⭐️ Loved reading your post!! Thankyou for being as sweet as pie!😉

You know I see shades of Rano in most women in my community but at the same time I have not seen anyone to behave the way she does. She wants to be taken seriously but acts carelessly, she wants to be known as mature lady but behaves very immaturely, so what is one to do?😕 How does one help her and how does SHE help herself? People like her can only be happy when they help themselves.

She has been blinded by anger for her action was wrong and she needs to realise that because such inappropriate behaviour only exacerbates the situation and we have seen proof of that more than once!

I think the real reason is the years of volcanic neglect which has finally erupted! So the real people she needs to consult and be talking are all the elders, especially Alok! I really don't like the way he undermines her in every situations. Ok the others don't consider her but what about Alok, why doesn't her think "What about Rano?" SHE IS HIS WIFE!.. They all need to see the bigger picture..Rano needs to widen her horizon too as this is depicting her as more of a narrow minded person who is being very obstinate!



Very well said….I really have nothing more to add as you actually summarized everything I feel about the Rano situation and character. I especially liked the part you said about there being a Rano in many women but not the whole character herself. I have some elements of Rano in me too….in that I tend to initially let things slide when they bother me but then all that accumulates and I reach a bursting point, the volcanic eruption. But I don't think I reach a point where I embarrass myself like Rano had in front of national tv. Khair, Rano's character and situation was a good case study more than anything else in this whole track. 😆
mjtruelegend thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: MadameX



Very well said'.I really have nothing more to add as you actually summarized everything I feel about the Rano situation and character. I especially liked the part you said about there being a Rano in many women but not the whole character herself. I have some elements of Rano in me too'.in that I tend to initially let things slide when they bother me but then all that accumulates and I reach a bursting point, the volcanic eruption. But I don't think I reach a point where I embarrass myself like Rano had in front of national tv. Khair, Rano's character and situation was a good case study more than anything else in this whole track. 😆



Well I certainly hope not Ekta. Inappropriate behaviour is not a good thing and it does not benefit anyone and it is certainly not justified by anything! If you ever have a problem, talk about it. If its a small one, frivolous matter, then let it go but if its big then its best to be dealt with. Communication is the key. Its best to prevent things getting out of hand...keep things at the minimum..the more you bottle, the more the anguish and the more the potential damage!

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".