KZK2 FF: ~A happy Ending~ Ch1 updated

Hey guys,

So I really wanted to write a story on KZK2, I’m really sick of the current storyline and the past few storylines. I decided to give it a shot and write what I would have loved to see in the show. This story is about KZK2 and not just a particular couple. Before reading the prologue, please read the points I have mentioned below to understand the story better.

- Prerna was saved by a couple of fishermen (NOT by Mr.Bajaj) she hasn’t been in contact with Bajaj all these years but he does have an important role in this story

- Anurag did not marry Komolika and did not have a baby with her. Komolika always persisted him to get married to her but he kept saying that he needs time to forget Prerna. Komolika lives with him and is okay with not being married as long as she gets to be with Anurag while everybody else outside the family and the society thinks they are married but the reality is something else.

- Anupam and Nivi are still together but don’t behave like a married couple. Anupam hates Nivi and cannot forgive her for what she had done to Prerna. For Anupam, this marriage is just for namesake but Nivi really loves him and always tries to get their love back.

- Moloy and Anupam are still in touch with Prerna

- Mohini finds out everything about Komolika and tries to find Prerna everywhere but in vain. She has been living in guilt all these years but can’t do anything.

- Anurag hates Mohini and doesn’t treat her as his mother anymore because of what she did to Prerna

- the storyline about Sneha remains the same

- Lastly, Rajesh is ALIVE. After the accident, Moloy was paralyzed just like in the serial and Rajesh was saved too after sustaining a permanent leg injury but Moloy and Rajesh are not in contact with each other after whatever the Basu’s did to his daughter.

- Prerna has been living in London all alone while her family is back in Kolkata.

Prologue

7 years later ~

It had been 7 years since that horrible incident. The incident that had changed Prerna Sharma and Anurag Basu’s lives forever. An incident which had become the reality of their lives.

It had been 7 years since Anurag had decided to throw Prerna out of his life in order to save her. He knew that he had to save her, save her from the wrath of Komolika. Even though it nearly killed him knowing that he would never be able to hold her again, he had to make that sacrifice, for his Prerna and his baby girl Sneha. When he pushed Prerna off the bridge, he threw away a part of his heart that knew would go away with her. He knew he needed to be strong, for this was his harsh reality now. The pain that he had to live with forever.

London~

“Ma’am, can I get you anything else?”, asked the shy waiter who couldn’t get his eyes off her.

“I think I am good for now, thank you”, smiled Prerna as she grabbed her cup of coffee and walked out of her favorite coffee shop.

This had been her routine for the past 7 years. She would religiously grab a coffee and leave for office every single day. This was the only time of the day that she had to herself. She was usually always surrounded by people so when she would get these 15 mins between the coffee shop and her office, she would cherish it.

As she sipped her coffee, she couldn’t help but notice how much everything had changed. Her eyes, that once sparkled and had the power to light up the room now had calmness in it. For the first time in her life, she wasn’t running away from anything or anyone, for the first time, she was happy and in the moment.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard a similar voice calling her out.

“Ma’am you seem to have forgotten your phone in there” said the waiter who had earlier served her the coffee

“Oh, I think I must have forgotten it in a rush, thank you so much”, said Prerna as she passed him a genuine smile

“No worries, I am glad I could be of help. Do you mind if I ask you something?”

"Sure what’s up?”

"Would you like to go for dinner with me sometime?"

Prerna smiled as she closed her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she continued,

"I really appreciate your offer Alex but I am actually moving back home"

"Oh", said Alex, disappointment clear on his face.

"It was really nice knowing you Alex, I am going to miss your coffee, take care and good luck"

"Thank you, I wish the same for you", said Alex as he side hugged her.

Prerna picked up her bag and and started to walk towards the train station when her phone rang.

“Prernaji, jaisa aapne kahan tha, woh sab hogaya hai"

"Great, aur meri flight kab hai?"

"Ji Kal raat ki hai"

"Okay great, thank you"

Prerna took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she heard the line on the other end disconnect.

"It's time to go back home"

I would really really appreciate if y'all would read it and give me your honest feedback!

Really looking forward to what you guys have to say! 😊

Love,

Kiara

Please do update soon it’s good story thanks

Chapter 1:

Sharma Niwas~

The house which once emitted laughter and noise had been quiet since the past 7 years. The Sharma’s had lost their daughter, not physically but they knew that their happy go lucky Prerna had mentally been murdered by the Basu’s. These 7 years had been hard for each and every member of the family, the pain and the hatred they carried had been pinned into their hearts forever.

Their routine was the same everyday.

The Sharma’s would wake up and exchange fake pleasantries, Suman would serve breakfast, everybody would eat silently. Once everybody was done eating, they would go back in their rooms and spend their entire day there. They would only see each other again when the next meal was due.

It had been years since the sound of prayers had been heard in the house. Veena and Rajesh had stopped performing Aarti like they used to everyday. They had no reason to pray anymore. They had given up on God just like they thought how God had given up on them.

But something was different today, it had to be different, Prerna was coming back. After 7 long years, she was finally coming back home. The house was rather cheerful today.

“Arre Suman, zara diye ke liye tel lana”, screamt Veena trying to catch the attention of her daughter in law

“Abhi laayi, yeh lijiye mummyji”, said Suman as she handed her the bottle

“Waise mummyji, humne toh Bhagwan ke Aage puja karna bohot Pehle hi band kardiya tha na, toh aaj yeh kyu?”

“Woh isliye kyunki pehle humare pass koi wajah nahi thi Bhagwan ke saamne sar jhuka ne ki. Sab toh cheen hi gaya tha lekin aaj bohot waqt ke baad ek nayi asha ki kiran aayi hai, meri Prerna aaj ghar aa rahi hai”, smiled Veena, pain visible in her eyes.

Suman rolled her eyes as she walked out and into the kitchen.

“Maa, main aur Mahesh zara Ghirdhari lalji ke dukaan jaake aate hai, Prerna ko wahan ki mithai bohot pasand hai na”, said Shekhar as he walked into the living room with Mahesh by his side.

“Theekh hai beta, jaldi aana, Prerna ki flight bas abhi thodi der mein hi pohochti hogi”

Basu Badi~

“Debbu, Debbu”, Screamt Mohini as she walked down the stairs

“Kahan margaya yeh”

“Ji badi memsaab”

“Kabse awaz laga rahi hun, agar sunai nahi deta toh jaake apne kaan ka ilaj karwao”

“Sorry memsaab”

“Sabka breakfast unke room main pohoch gaaya?”

“Ji, aur sabne khaana bhi khaliya sivai Anurag baba ko chodh ke”

“Anu ne khana nahi khaya?”

“Nahi, aaj toh baba jaldi hi office ke liye nikal gaye”

“Theekh hai, tum jaake apna kaam karo”, said Mohini disappointment clear on her face.

Mohini couldn’t remember the last time the family had sat together and had a conversation. It had been years that the Basu’s did anything together. The meals were served individually in everybody’s room and sometimes it would be days that they would go without crossing each others paths.

Mohini’s room~

“Oho shasurji, itni subah apne mujhe apne kamre mein kyun bulaya?”, asked Anupam as he walked into Moloy’s room and lazily sat on the bed

“Abey kumkaran ki aulad, tu toh bas sota hi reh. Tujhe pata bhi hai aaj kya hai?”

“Aaj toh Thursday hai na?”, asked Anupam innocently

“Mein bhi kisse baat kar rahan hun”, said Moloy as he slapped his hand on his head. “arre mere naadan se damad, aaj woh din hai jiska hume kabse intezaar tha, aaj Prerna wapas aar rahi hai”

“Arre hai, finally woh din aahi gaya jiska hume kabse intezaar tha”, said Anupam excitedly as he crossed his legs waiting for his father in law to continue

“Haan yaar sach mein Bohot wait kiya iss din ka, God is Great”, said Moloy as he looked up and passed a salute to God

“Waise Aage kya?”, asked Anupam curiously

“Bas kuch nahi, sab ready hai, ab toh bas intezaar hai toh Prerna ka, kahani mein toh twist ab aayega”, said Moloy as he winks at Anupam.

Originally posted by: sahra1977

Please do update soon it’s good story thanks

Aww thank you so much for commenting, the first chapter has been updated!😊

M loving this, its somewhere on the same lines of how I wanted the show to be with AnuPre only no extra marriages with the villians n egohini ji liking loving prerna nivipam ka pyar n all please keep updating

Grr. There is a reason the industry is anti prologues..... because in most instances the author needs to tell themselves the story first.....

That's harsh I know but there's some serious talent here - that's stumbling a bit due to execution issues.

Backstory belongs in writer's notes - they form part of the history you allow to trickle through as the story progresses. As a writer you need to know everything beforehand, as a reader it switches you off because you already suspect where the story is going to go.

A good writer knows when to reveal what and that flying by the seat of your pants is VERY DANGEROUS. Yes, a story takes on a life of its own when your characters are strong and opinionated enough, but then the story evolves to compensate (or you cut and edit).

The first three paragraphs:

"7 years later ~

It had been 7 years since that horrible incident. The incident that had changed Prerna Sharma and Anurag Basu’s lives forever. An incident which had become the reality of their lives.

It had been 7 years since Anurag had decided to throw Prerna out of his life in order to save her. He knew that he had to save her, save her from the wrath of Komolika. Even though it nearly killed him knowing that he would never be able to hold her again, he had to make that sacrifice, for his Prerna and his baby girl Sneha. When he pushed Prerna off the bridge, he threw away a part of his heart that knew would go away with her. He knew he needed to be strong, for this was his harsh reality now. The pain that he had to live with forever. "

First question: Who is the reader actually with?
You need to decide from which perspective you are going to narrate the story from. You can change this between chapters but try to decide on starting a chapter whose side you're on.

Second warning that you have not fully worked this out: You repeat incident 3 times in the first 4 sentences. You have repeated/ reworded the same thing 3 times before getting to the incident. To an experienced reader this spells: lots of frustration to come, because a story where a writer rewords and repeats themselves is almost as difficult (slow) to read as purple prose (excessive use of adjectives) It comes across or conveys a sense of uncertainty (which sentence said it best?).

Dialogue: Be very careful here, you tend to overwrite the dialogue. Listen to people talking - even if it's not English. Very few people speak in full sentences or have perfect grammar when speaking, I know I don't. Remember dialogue also conveys education, class and opinion to the reader. A police officer speaks different to a millionaire and a beggar.

What your writing does show is consideration of your character's emotions - but you need to show more not tell it.

Example

"Would you like to go for dinner with me sometime?"

Edited

He cleared his throat, hesitated, scolded himself for it and then asked, "Would you like to go for dinner sometime?"

In that sentence, without telling the reader the character's feelings, the character is shown as being hesitant, but determined and brave - he actually asked her. There is depth there that you cannot get by telling a reader what the character is feeling.

Redundant phrases like "with me" makes a character come across as insecure. It's okay if a character is insecure and downtrodden though.

Example 2

“Ma’am, can I get you anything else?”, asked the shy waiter who couldn’t get his eyes off her.

Edited

The waiter glanced at her again, a little longer this time, for a moment forgetting why he had approached her table, but then fell back on his training, "Ma'am, can I get you anything else?"

The character comes across as awestruck to the point of being unable to speak in her presence, yet he remembers his place and is not overbearing or obnoxious.

To start the story, keeping in mind what follows, should have been from Prerna's pov.

Something like:

Prerna sat staring into her coffee. This day, this date, she hated it. It marked another year passed, totaling seven since that fateful day that had changed everything . She had come to accept what had happened, had done everything she could to move on in her life. But fact remained, it was that part of her past that held her back, rendered her unwilling to even consider another relationship, because she had trusted blindly, loved completely... and it had gotten her thrown from a bridge by the very person she had trusted more than herself, Anurag Basu.

There were questions that remained unanswered. An innocent child had lost her life, their child. If ever she was going to move on, she needed answers, justification, revenge even. Which was why she was going back.

***

The part with Anurag should be kept for when he is introduced, and his mood and regrets are revealed. That way the reader has some familiarity with their emotional investment in events.

Good job on the tenses and grammar.