NOVEL~*Hiding behind a Stranger*~Thread 10 - Chapter 15 - UPD 11th SEP

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Pooja

@Jais1

Voyager

Posted: 9 years ago

#561

Hi, Lashy
How are you?
I know I am very late in this but still congrats Lashy for your new story. And what I say about this story, i thought last one was brilliant but this one it's amazing. You are really a very amazing writer. You have a way to write the stories, which always makes your reader curious , fascinate and asking for more.
And thanks for pm me , Lashy.

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#562

Originally posted by: neepobithi
Everyone is so worked up here on the revelation of USTAD.So here I'm posting something different altogether.Something which reflects BAHADUR'S GRATITUDE [I don't know why but I'm feeling that this aspect of chap.15 is somehow getting neglected in all the discussions]

Now I can run on the wind
My skin like a velvet shiver on the breeze
My hooves passing over the grass
In leaps too great to be measured
My mane tumbling like the boiling clouds
You will feel my breath
In the warmth of summer
You will hear my heart beat
In the sounds of the sky
Now I can run
In these great wide rolling hills of time
I am truly free
Here in the spaces of your heart

[A poem from the internet]

I am truly free
Here in the spaces of your heart

Lovely poem, Neepobithi👏 (now I am so sorry if you mentioned your name.. but errr... I'm just really not one with the greatest of memories... so can you please tell me how you'd like to be called😳)

Thanks for bringing this up... once again...

😳

Saraswathi Periyamma (karukuzhali) posted her own words on Bahadur a few pages ago... did you come across that? It was beautiful...

Somehow with animals - they're truly grateful... need nothing except basic care, food and affection...

Heera and AMK assumed (playfully) that Bahadur stood beside Heera because of a bag of peanuts

When in reality, what it was trying to show, by coddling her palms was just plain gratitude for bringing those changes in its master..

Thanks again, for this🤗

Edited by lashy - 9 years ago

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#563

Originally posted by: ---jais---
Hi, Lashy
How are you?
I know I am very late in this but still congrats Lashy for your new story. And what I say about this story, i thought last one was brilliant but this one it's amazing. You are really a very amazing writer. You have a way to write the stories, which always makes your reader curious , fascinate and asking for more.
And thanks for pm me , Lashy.

Pooja... how have you been? Didn't think I'd see you here... so you've been following the story too? I'm so glad... thanks for the compliments dear... 🤗 hope to see more of you...

Are you planning to catch up on CGM too when it airs?

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#564

Originally posted by: alffim
Dear Lashy!
I have long realized that I should just relax and follow Scheherazade ... 😃
Loool... Zhanna... 😆
Your new chapter, as always, stunningly intriguing. No way out of the labyrinth and no easy ways ... Behind each turn again a new maze and puzzle. 😉
Yes though I think we have sort-of reached the end of quite a few puzzles now... now it's more HOW the story unfolds... 🤔

I guess, I didn't read attentively, but it seemed to me that Ustaad adult male age 40.
No no Zhanna... you read attentively... I didn't state the age of the Ustaad... but I did, use adjectives like 'retired' (retired from battle) respected (for warfare) and experienced (with weapons) that made him sound 'old'
Why even the word Ustaad which means 'Master/Sir', one would instantly imagine an older man... not a young 25 year old... 😳

I imagine that Akbar has a secret mission, but not the second dangerous opponent Heera. I thought he was in opposition to Shahzade.
Dangerous opponent?
He is in the enemy camp no doubt... but at this point, Zhanna, he is her least dangerous opponent.. he is still her safest bet!
Ironic isn't it? The man who's supposed to be her biggest enemy (spying on her, intercepting her scrolls, looking for the Farmaan and even responsible for training Khalil) is the one man who somehow knows the unadulterated truth... who somehow wants to protect her... and the only one who will be able to!😊 Fate...

Very heavy feeling, Heera doesn't know what everything around lies and deceit, and there is no help, letters intercepted. There is nothing worse than a devotee of confidence.
In the longest run, the heavy feeling will not be there...
For now though, poor Heera is surrounded by lies and deceit, yes...

It was assumed (just me?) that Akbar doesn't know about Durga's death. But maybe he avoided her because he knew about her grief too?
Of course Ustaad/Amk knows about Durga's death... that is why he was given the assignment by prince to cover up Khalil's botch job... But AMK is against the kind of things that happened to Durga... of course, AMK has killed many men too... but those victims would be soldiers in a war.. or armed enemies of the Shehzaade.. or deceitful plotting nobles from the opposite camp... not people like Durga/Heera, who aren't really out to harm anyone!

There will be a major conflict between love and duty?
Basis of the story!😃

Heera and Bahadur: a remarkable understanding of Heera, the horse shows resentment, and not a "betrayal."
Not resentment... you mean... affection... no he's not betraying his master... he's just thanking her for changing him😳

I apologize for the confusion. I'm still sick.
I hope you get well Zhanna.. it's been so long... 🤗 Hugs to make you feel better!

Edited by lashy - 9 years ago

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#565

Originally posted by: luvuyuvi
Akanksha... before I go ahead, I must tell you that these comments were absolutely stupendous!👏 Bulls-eye, I'd call it!

In three paras you listed everything so crisp and clear.. and brought out many salient points too..

I'd call this chapter gamechanger. Because with this chapter many equations have changed .one could see many things in clear light now.so you finally raised the curtains and revealed khan sahib's real profession. Khan sahib and heera were bound together by this assignment even before their first meeting.
Firstly this, 👏YES AMK and Heera's connections go back... even before she met the lone stranger that night in the forest... they start from the minute Shehzaade handed Ustaad the assignment 😊

As you disclosed, that the mighty ustaad is none other than our khan sahib.it was very unexpected and therefore shocking as well. It's definitely major turn in the story. You very intelligently put AMK above khalil . And the fact that he is close to shehzade would be useful to him in future, it seems. AMK appears more powerful than ever.
Very well noted... I had a broad grin when you brought up this point... he is in an oddly-intriguing position AMK... he's not a prince, not even a royal, he doesn't boast the high-position Khalil does... yet, as of today, in his own way, he is more powerful than he'd be if he was any of this... 😃

So it was shehzade who had helped akbar in childhood and made him mighty warrior. Akbar is fiercely loyal to the Prince as of now. Future me to aap pe depend hai sab.
Lol!

Heera... she is surrounded by problems. Mahinder, shehzade, khalil , AMK (?) And the list is endless. No place is safe for her actually, because her enemies are too cruel. And biggest problem, she don't even know many of them are hiding in the guise of well-wishers (even we are clueless). But as of now, aidabad is safe. Hopefully this is temporary phase..
Wow... well said... again!👏

Mahinder...he is a traitor. Thrust for Power has made him murderer. He would create problems in future too, I guess.
Hmmm

Bahadur...he is so cute and intelligent. I've heard lot about horses. Loyal, smart and trustworthy. But still last para amazed me.
Oh you must read it from Horse owners themselves... I read a few Horse forums to see what owners have to say about their animals... and the funny stories and scenarios they posted, were quite amusing! Btw, horses are good actors too...😉

The game of ganjifa...conversation between AMK and Prince. Both of them seemed equal as they were talking. The involvement of politics in this story makes it more interesting. AMK's standing against khalil proves that he would stand for his views, even if it meant standing against Prince
Another well-observed point... 🤗
Thanks so much dear.. and I hope college-life is fine...

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#566

Originally posted by: amitaprasad

Oh my GOd khan sahib is a traitor who destroyed all her agonized painful endeavour to write those heart wrenching scrolls...this act of khan sahib has aptly justified the title ...he is a stranger whom heera bai aiong with me misunderstood as a businessman..
Yes and that is why he is a stranger... in fact, he is a stranger to himself too... has been leading a double life for so long, we don't know who the real man is... Ustaad or AMK.. 😉

i want to hate this khan sahib but can not as i know being an intelligence officer it was his duty.
No... I guess, hate would be a strong word... since he hasn't done anything callously wrong... 🤔

Lashy how craftily u have brought havoc in this story..u have failed all my presumption...indeed an unimaginable unpredictable turn in the story...weaving a story with all this amalgamation either suspense ,thrills,romance and many more remind me what a writer u are?
Thanks so much, dear... 🤗

and for ur punctuality i have no words ,i am speechless..i want to write a lot but my vocabulary is not strong how poor of me?but i want to do it a standing ovation for my Writer-e-Khas.thanks for pm to this wonderful story which keep me energetic while waiting for an update.
Thanks for the thumbs-up on my punctuality... lol hope I keep it going...😆 yesterday my husband asked me 'how many more chapters' (he's obviously losing patience...)
when I told him it's 60 in total, he was like 'Next year? Oh God!'

🤗 Thanks again, Amita

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#567

Lashy Di!!🤗👏👏

What can I say after reading this chapter again for second time! For the first time when I read the chapter at a glance as time was short, I was very much excited, even was trying to visualize the whole scenario between Shahzaade and Ustaad to be enacted in front of my eyes for countless time, was to imagine about the future of the story of Heera and Akbar... this chapter had literally made me mad for some hours, and I was dying to read it again and again and again. 😆

I actually can't believe it, Stuti... it feels so nice to find out what went on in the minds of the readers... very gratifying... if there is one thing I wouldn't forget after HBAS, it's these reactions...

Like the brain-freeze reaction Shyamala Periyamma said... or the fact that Bindup complained she couldn't sleep well that night...or how Shruthi dropped her phone ...

Sorry... and no dear, I'm not trying to be mean by enjoying it... but more 'taken aback/enthralled' at the desired effect it had

But after going through the chapter again, much vividly this time, when I have sat to write about what I felt, words are not coming on the tips of my finger... speechless in a true sense all of a sudden. 😲 😆

If I have not mistaken, we had a glimpse of this Ustaad before in chapter 8- the prince talking with him on Parnagarh matter, followed by a short encounter between him and Khalil. Now my whole concentration was on prince and khalil at the whole place, never took the Ustaad much seriously; I had actually presumed the ustaad to be an old, experienced, aged muscular man with expressionless vicious face and gray hairs with a pony 🤣, how would I even think in my dream that that man can also be our heartthrob- the one and only young and vigourous Khan Sahib? 😲Though it was quite expected from the development of the story, from the comments, and mostly from the mysterious lifestyle of him that Khan Sahib can never be only a horse-merchant, and he was already suspected to be dark, in the team of Mughals, so this revealation did not shock me much that it did in Mahindar's case; but you know... Ustaad and Khan Sahib are the same man, and he is like the right hand of the prince himself was truly a dhamakedaar surprise package!!😃⭐️

Thanks dear... yes, I loved your visualisation of Ustaad.. and I think 25 years from now, that's how he'd look.. (with a ponytail, if Heera allows him to sport one!😆)

but as of now, he's a 'dark' heartthrob... in your own words!😉

I like the prince from the first. [I always have fascination towards black that pure white 😆] He may be darkest, and he is the lead of the enemy camp that is behind Heera and her land, but still I do like his regal appearance and princely attitude, calculated visionary, methodical approach to his targets and all... I loved the whole conversation between Akbar and the prince regarding the matter of Khalil, and over all liked the chemistry between the duo. Somehow remembered me Karna and Duryadhan of Mahabharat. 😆 Eager to know the whole story of Akbar's past-life from now on.

I quite like etching his character too... not-too-much not-too-little edge-of-the-seat kinda guy he is! Never know what he'd do next...🤔

Aurangazeb was quite like that.. impulsive & unpredictable...

Akbar's inner turmoil between loyalty vs new-find love... Wonderfully crafted!!👏😳😳 I am again in love with the story- the was the love is slowly budding... the conflicts and turbulence... and the untimely spring of love... Just too beautiful!

Thanks a lottt❤️

The farmaan is the key of the story and everyone is in search of it!! This part is growing even more interesting day by day!!⭐️⭐️

And not the least, the card-game part, the explanation was just wow!!!⭐️👏

Farmaan is the key to the story, till the Shehzaade decides to stay patient... and look for it...let's see how long his patience lasts... 😆

The last part, the bonding between Heera and Bahadur was so lovely! Is Bahadur going to be the cupid? 😉 However, this only 16 years old young heiress had to see so many things in this little scope of time around her; the black shadow of dark politics clouding around her entity, her sister's cruel death, those whom she believes turned out to be backstabber and she is yet to know that truth, the person who gave her shelter, on whom she is building fascination is actually from enemy team... a dirty game of politics and a competition for power and more power is being played around her, making her the center of that with which this innocent girl had no direct connection till that day also... still, despite going through such a terrible uncertain situation, she has not lost her innocence, her smile and the positive vibe within her heart- that will give her the energy of standing against all the negative strengths again... for sake of her own, and her men of Parnagarh, and to give justice to her sister Durga, whose precious life has been sacrificed in this game of politics and powers for no reason!!

Yes difficult to imagine that one (nearly) innocent 16 year old is the 'lone force' that alters the course of the actions of 4 very powerful men AMK, Shehzaade, Khalil and Mahendar.🤔 All want her for different reasons

Someone asked me if there would be any evil-women in this story... but I guess... no... I never realised when I started writing it... but in a Male chauvinistic 17th c society story, I guess (and hope) that the female villains wouldn't be missed...😆

Update soon Di. Can't wait. 😳

Thanks da... 🤗

Edited by lashy - 9 years ago

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#568

STILL Reeling from All of it ...

You visit us, after 15 chapters...😆 but what a *whiste-adi* entry you make Sokku podi.. beautiful.. loved it... I read it twice... 😉

The AWE I felt for Heera as she bravely took the responsibility as a ONLY leader and heiress of Parnagarh Could !👏

The JOY I felt for the small mercies in the life of the man , whom possibly have spent most of his Adolescence in darkness when a Healer finally had found a way to inject some light in it !😳

The ECSTACY I felt when both the tormented souls took a little break from their pasts , ONLY to find a different emotion they have never experienced before for - each other!😃

Ecstacy was my favourite.. need I even say why? 😉

The SMILE I had when two different personalities recognized the inner character of other , rather than what they display outwardly and RESPECT them for the same !😊

Again... what a beauty.. 👏

The UTTER SHOCK I had when I got to know of the treacherous thoughts of the Kunwar Mahendar! 😲

The SORROW I felt for the Godfather , who cared for his godchild just as much as when he would have had his own child !😕

The MISERY I felt to think of Durga Bai , the true Rajput yoddha as she lived and martyred for her lands !😭

I know..

And to top it all , The ANGER & ANXIETY I felt for the situation in which Heera is now entangled btw the web of enemies ( Partly including & Removing our Hero here ) .😡

Loool till I read the last bit, I wasn't sure if you'd reach chapter 15... but yes...

Lashy , u r one devilish Author to have made a young Man - a Ustaad and made us all think of him as a Old man 😡😡 . But u r a clever one too , to have delivered other Gem- yes , once again a gem amongst all the other FF's in this forum !!⭐️

Thank you so so so much, dear.. thanks a lot!!! 🤗 Pls don't tell me you'll be back only after Chapter 30 now... 😆

Love you loadssesssesss... Mwah!

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Shraddha

@lashy

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#569

Loool my hands are feeling a little bit like this now...😆

Sandy and Adwi... your two brilliant reviews... 🤗 I will reply to them tonight or tomorrow... ok?

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karkuzhali

@karkuzhali

Inactive

Posted: 9 years ago

#570

My very dear Shyamala,

@bold:.The so called hunars of mine all put together will never stand against the Akarshan Shakti you have. I recall some of my comments about your reviews which I posted some months back in your Jodha Akbar threads...

Saraswathi Akka.

( From the thread,"From Bad to Worse")

Who are you?

Diplomat? By being diplomatic in responding to everyone's post.

Essayist? So very articulate, chatty, declamatory,stylistic, picturesque, emphatic, poetic, diffuse ( sometimes), idiomatic, humorous and soothing way of writing.

Psychologist? Probing into the inner sides of the characters while analysing a situation.

Anatomist? Showing how to dissect/treat and understand a situation.

An astrologer? Predicting what would happen under the circumstances.

A lawyer? As a Prosecutor while arguing for Akbar and his kingdom, and as a Defense Counsel (very rarely) for Jodha.

A Debator? Producing counter arguments for the comments in the Forum.

A Connoisseur? Admiring and enjoying the nuances of the several sequences.

A Critic? Expressing your views impartially,but strongly, like Sri Subbudu !

Saraswathi.

( From the thread, "The Gordian Knot")

Dear Shyamala,

I have adorned the role of a Bharatanatyam critic and reviewed your analyses of the episodes so far. I have tried to compare the nine bhavas with your write ups.

(Disclaimer

I am not a Bharatanatyam dancer and the following review done by me is purely based on the knowledge I got from the books on the subject.)

Here goes my take.

1. Shringaram ( Love): You have shown a trace of this bhav in your performance of the item, Imperial Strategems, when you did you abhinayam for Jalal-Jodha:&I and Jalal- Mischief abounding. But it is not sufficient for a critic like me. However I am happy that you raised my hopes with the promise (I read it in a magazine called JA forum) that you will be looking into it in your next performance titled Sunlight on the Butterflies' Wings.

2 Hasyam. ( Humour, laughter, mirth): I understand that it is your favourite bhav and I have seen you showing this rasa beautifully in almost all of your performances. But I can say that the best portrayal of this this bhav was wonderfully done in your item, the Pall of darkness lifts . In spite of issuing the statutory warning before the start of the item, the audience stayed back and enjoyed the piece, barring a few who can be excused.

3.Bibathsam (Disgust, aversion): Who can forget the difficult bhav you had exquisitely shown in doing the nrityafor the lines "Jodha-bizarre Obsession" in the item , Darkness before Dawn? And also the touches of the same rasa in "Maham- viciousness-unfounded" and "Ruqaiah-mindless plsticity" in your theme "Changing Equations?

4.Karunyam (Compassion, empathy): You chose to take up the piece the darkness descends from the same Darkness before Dawn to showcase your talent in presenting the sanchari bhavas and how well you added dimensions to the not-so-easy a rasa!

5.Roudram ( Anger, Fury): I know that this bhav comes to you very easily as I can see from the expressions you show in several pieces while portraying the foolishness of the nayak or nayaki of your subject.

6.Adbutham (Wonder, Awe ):Oh god! I had goosebumps when I watched you perform the "Emperor strikes Back" which gave you ample scope for exploiting this bhav! I can bet that no other artist can do such a choreography as you had painstakingly done for this one! Throughout the program I never felt that I was watching a dance recital, but , I felt like being in the company of the characters effectively portrayed by you!

7.Shantham :(Tranquility): This bhav cannot be shown but should be felt. You are very talented in portraying this throughout in your performances ,whenever you want to show a gesture for a neutral stand taken.

8. Bhayaankam ( Horror, Terror): So far I do not remember to have seen you doing this rasa in any of your recitals.But I am sure you will be capable of doing this also without any effort.

9. Vikram - Veeram : (Heroism) I have been watching all your performances for quite some time and I could say that this bhav is present in all your programs whatever theme you choose for your choreography .

* * * * *

"To revert, Akka, it is so very clever, this idea of yours, and I am amazed at how resourceful and tenacious you are! Really wonderful. I am 9 years younger than you are, and I do not have even half of your drive and your hunars!👏"

Shyamala

Edited by karkuzhali - 9 years ago