After Irrfan’s demise, son Babil was depressed, reveals having suicidal thoughts: ‘I crashed’

It’s been a year since Irrfan Khan left all of us after his two year long battle with cancer. He is one of the finest talents in the history of Indian cinema and his loss will always be difficult to fathom.

On Irrfan Khan’s first death anniversary, his son Babil Khan opens up about he slipped into depression and had suicidal thoughts after his father’s demise.

While speaking to Times of India, Babil shared that in the first few days, he was putting up a brave front and running around, doing everything, making sure everything was fine at home and at the hospital. He also recalls a heartbreaking moment from the time Irrfan was hospitalised.

“I can’t explain the amount of pain he was going through when he was conscious. I particularly remember when they were going to put a catheter, and asked me to leave the room, and he almost yelled, ‘Babil, tum kahin mat jao mujhe chhod ke!’ They pulled me out of the room and he screamed my name. I never felt that much pain and helplessness. I just stood there outside, hearing him scream my name. I dealt with it well in that moment, but after he passed – initially, Mumma was surprised how well I was taking it – but two days after he passed away, I crashed. I just crashed. Everything shut off. I went into deep, deep depression. I can’t even explain.”

Further, the 24 year old Babil reveals having suicidal thoughts after the unfortunate loss of his father. 

“There was no will to wake up. I was very suicidal. "I was done. I didn’t have any will to live. I still struggle with it a lot. And at that time, Mumma was the strength. She has always been the strength of our family. Throughout Baba’s career.”

Babil also adds that the only thing he regrets is  that his father was unable to see him act. He recalled how he played an extra during the shoot of Qarib Qarib Single and Irrfan beamed with joy as he saw him in front of the camera.

Meanwhile, Babil Khan is all set to make his acting debut with the upcoming film, Qala that stars him and Bulbul fame Tripti Damri.