Nazar

Nazar/ Piansh Stories - Page 37

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Madhura.. thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

Okay! Got your point. πŸ‘πŸΌ


But honestly, I feel you have a preconceived notion that I want to take revenge from Ansh. πŸ˜†


It's not like that at all. In fact, nothing can really justify Piya's action in this story too. So what? She just got accepted at a program that didn't suit her and it gave her the right to bash her husband? No way! In my opinion, Ansh was the better spouse in this story because he only gave it back after Piya had crossed her limit. Even at the end, he took the lead and assured her that they'll make it work.


Ansh had every reason to be angry with Piya because she practically called him useless. It's very natural for anyone to reply that they are completely capable of taking care of themselves and they don't need the person accusing them. Now Ansh definitely had no idea that there will be Kohrayan essence and it would send him back to another dimension. So how is he the criminal here? He is rather the victim of the circumstances. 


I have issue with particular tracks and I am being honest here, I had issue with Bhootu and YMMKD at particular tracks too! Those stories were finite so the list is short, Nazar is 400+ episodes so the list is long. And I would be honest, both the writers of the other two shows had planned their stories in a much better way than Gul and Mrinal did. 


So no, I  have no issue with Nazar in general and I am more than happy with the way it ended. πŸ˜ƒ


So far, the stories have been continuation from the show's particular tracks like Pari Revival or Adi-Piya reunion. So I had to work with the information given in the show itself.


I still tried to include Mridul in the revival one and probably I'll add other details in future, considering I get any idea.


Don't get me wrong, but I'll quote your dialogue here. Try reading the stories with an open mind.


You are way too attached with Ansh's character as I feel no matter how much I try to humanize Piya or portray her shortcomings, you always feel I have tried to glorify her and paint Ansh as the black sheep. That's not the case here.


As the writer I have complete clarity on that. If you still feel otherwise, then we can agree to disagree. πŸ˜Š After all every one of us has different way of interpretation of the same thing. πŸ˜Š 


I don't have any such notion honestly. Like if I have, I would prefer not reading a story for my peace of mind.


I did tell you, the overall feel was that, I did appreciate the conversation you mentioned, cos both talked it out. So this reference is void. Ofc circumstances were unexpected and it was a normal fight.


Yes, can happen.


Yeah, see it depends on flow.


Sure, you could quote me, and I did read with an open mind, but I got a flavour which I just shared. Like I said, preferences and perception can play differently. Morrow I may write a balanced story, acc to me, but you could totally feel I messed Pia. So let's agree to disagree!!πŸ˜ƒ


If you see, in both my replies, I confessed that I appreciate Ansh as a character, and hence may have felt that.


PS : Thanks for explaining time zones, hence you continued from the show itself.

Nush_Rat thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

True! you have much better control over yourself and I admire that. πŸ‘πŸΌ


Totally agree. Our connection and interpretation differs and it's very much possible that tomorrow I might find bias in a story which according to you is balanced. So it's not necessary that we'll agree on everything all the time. πŸ˜Š

Madhura.. thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

True! you have much better control over yourself and I admire that. πŸ‘πŸΌ


Totally agree. Our connection and interpretation differs and it's very much possible that tomorrow I might find bias in a story which according to you is balanced. So it's not necessary that we'll agree on everything all the time. πŸ˜Š


Thank you! I do have, helpsπŸ˜ƒ.

Exactly, but we can just share . 

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Posted: 4 years ago

Okay, Nushy if you don't mind I want to add a conversation between Ansh and his alter-ego as a chapter after this last one...

Just felt like writing something and I wrote a scene between these two.

Edited by Nikki_srk - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Nikki_srk

Okay, Nushy if you don't mind I want to add a conversation between Ansh and his alter-ego as a chapter after this last one...

Just felt like writing something and I wrote a scene between these two.

Why would I mind? It has been a collaboration after all. πŸ˜Š Let me edit my chapter's name and you add last chapter in the bracket when you upload, okay? πŸ˜Š

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

Why would I mind? It has been a collaboration after all. πŸ˜Š Let me edit my chapter's name and you add last chapter in the bracket when you upload, okay? πŸ˜Š

Okay thanks... πŸ˜Š

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Posted: 4 years ago

Chapter 05- https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/153067702

Okay, so I was just bored sitting in my room. Felt like writing something and wrote this khichdi... To me, it made absolutely zero sense. But still, I posted this here... 

This was originally written as a separate OS but I thought to include it here...

Don't kill me for this one please... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         Chapter - 06 (Last Chapter)

Finally, their running around the room ended and they both sat down. Pia got up and was about to leave when Ansh stopped her...

"Where are you going now?"

"To check on the kids." Pia replied. "They must have stopped doing their homework and must be fooling around. I need to check on them. You take some rest."

"Ummm Pia..." 

Pia stopped and turned around. 

"I am hungry..." he said, looking at her sheepishly.

"Well, you would be. After all, you have been sleeping since morning." She said, giggling. "Just wait for a few minutes. I'll bring you something to eat."

Saying this, she left the room and returned after some time with a tray of food. Then she left him with it and went to check on the kids.

Ansh sat on the bed more comfortably, resting his back on the headboard. Putting the tray of food in front of him, he picked up the knife and fork and was about to begin eating when...

"Hello Mr. Rathod..."

He turned his head on hearing a familiar voice. His alter-ego was sitting next to him with a huge grin plastered on his face.

"Oh it's you... I was actually wondering why didn't you appear till now..."

His alter-ego raised one eyebrow and then said,"From which direction did the sun rise today?"

"Huh?" Ansh was confused.

"Well, I have come to meet you for the third time and this is the first time that you are greeting me so normally without getting annoyed. So, it's a miracle indeed!!"

And that was indeed true. For the first time, Ansh was not annoyed at his sudden appearance. In fact, he was actually smiling at him...

"Ah wait... Let me guess. You are flashing your 32 teeth because you are back to your own world??"

"Of course!! Why else would I be so happy?" Ansh said. "Everything is fine now... That was all a dream. Nothing was real. I am so happy that everything is normal."

His smile got wider and tears brimmed in his eyes remembering the conversation he had with Pia not long ago.

"Hey you!! Why are you crying now? Were you some Nirupa Roy fan in your previous birth or what? Shedding tears all the time..."

"I am not crying... They are just the tears of happiness."

"Seriously... Tears of happiness? I thought people smile and laugh when they are happy. Till date, I never understood why they cry when they are happy."

He paused for a few moments and then again continued...

"Remember that nursery rhyme: 'If you are happy and you know it, clap your hands'?" He got up from the bed. "In your case it should have been: 'If you are happy and you know it, shed some tears'."

He started singing...

"If you are happy and you know it, shed some tears"

"If you are happy and you know it, shed some tears"

If you are happy and you know it and you really want to show it, shed some tears."

He came and sat besides Ansh...

"What an amazing voice do you have!!" Said Ansh. "Listening to you is like hearing fingernails on a chalkboard."

"Oh thank you so much..." Said his alter-ego cheerfully.

"I was not complimenting you."

"No problem... I'll still take it as a compliment."

"Anyways... Why did you come here again?"

"Well, first of all, I came to congratulate you that everything is back to normal. And second..."

"Second?"

"Well, I heard you telling Pia that Naman was an even bigger creep in the other world..."

Before he could complete his sentence, Ansh spoke up,"Well, I just said that to bring a smile on Pia's face."

"Well, I don't care about that. Whether you said it as a joke or not is none of my business." He shrugged his shoulders. "But your words definitely made me think."

"And what did you think??" Asked Ansh, irritated.

"Well, you just said that Naman was an even bigger creep. But do you have any idea how your family or your ex-wife Ruby are in the other dimension?"

"Means?"

"Means... Here, you have the most loving and caring mother in the world. But what about the other dimension? What if she would have been a total vamp-ish step mother? Like Lalita Pawar from those 70's and 80's movies? You did not come across her, right? So, you can't say for sure that she would have been exactly how she is here, right?"

Ansh stared at him...

"Ah that reminded me of your narakwasi ex-sasurji... Since everyone was a normal human in that dimension, then he also should have been a human. No?"

"So... What?"

"So... Since he was a demon king here, he could be a similar person there too? What if he were some underworld don or mafia?"

Ansh kept on staring at him, not speaking a word...

"Now tell me, who would be needing help? You or Pia??"

By now, Ansh was totally annoyed...

"So, this is the second reason why you came here... To annoy me!!"

"Of course sweety!!" He said in a sweet voice. "Why else would I come here? I can't sleep without having a chat with you... You know?" He replied with a wink.

Ansh was staring at him with a frown on his face while cutting his food with the knife.

His alter-ego's face suddenly broke into a smile...

"What??" Ansh asked his alter-ego when the latter didn't stop smiling for some time.

"Unique taste buds..." He replied sarcastically.

Ansh looked down and saw that he had spilled the ketchup on the napkin and was trying to cut it with his knife.

"Do tell me how it tastes..." Were the last words which he said before disappearing again.

Ansh turned around and not finding his alter-ego there, resumed his food in silence. 

Finally, he lay down on the bed and closed his eyes, waiting for Pia to come back so that they could break the news to their families and celebrate it together...

Edited by Nikki_srk - 3 years ago


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Nush_Rat thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

🀣 πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£


Man! It was awesome! I can't get over the nursery rhime. πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† I was thinking about Ved all the time AE was singing. 


Hey! Is there any way we could set him up with Ved on a trip so that he could pakao Ved?   


Ansh's reference to AE's voice and his reference to Ansh's taste buds were epic. πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† 


Besides, Narakwasi Ex Sasur Ji and Ved as a cruel step mother. πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£


Unbelievable behna!!! πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†

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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: nushy1995

🀣 πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£


Man! It was awesome! I can't get over the nursery rhime. πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† I was thinking about Ved all the time AE was singing. 


Hey! Is there any way we could set him up with Ved on a trip so that he could pakao Ved?   


Ansh's reference to AE's voice and his reference to Ansh's taste buds were epic. πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜† 


Besides, Narakwasi Ex Sasur Ji and Ved as a cruel step mother. πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£ πŸ€£


Unbelievable behna!!! πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†

Thank you so much... πŸ€—

I am glad you liked it.


Well, that nursery rhyme was not planned initially. While writing, I was humming this rhyme and then I used 'shed some tears' in place of 'clap your hands' and bas achha laga to add kar diya.


Unfortunately, he is Ansh's alter-ego... To he will not be visible to Ved. But yes, even I was thinking about Ved while writing this...


Bold: thanks... πŸ˜†

Waise bhi, if everything was different in the other dimension, then baaki characters ke traits bhi to thode different hone chahiye na? πŸ˜†


Thank you once again... πŸ˜Š

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Posted: 4 years ago

I would rather request you to write another part. Like Piya and Ansh getting romantic and Ansh imagining his AE. Is it possible to write? πŸ˜Š